Thanks Tambug18 and WordsAreMusic for the reviews, I really apreciate them.

The song used in this is Plan B's Recluse but in this I've passed it off as if Ella wrote it herself and edited some of the words.


Ella's POV

I went over to the table they'd laid out at the side, a load of food and drink was on it, anything from pizza to cakes, water to soda, cheese to chocolate... There was a lot of food.

I wasn't much of sad eater but I just felt like eating today, and eating a lot, so I grabbed the biggest piece of the most delicious chocolate cake I could find and stuffed it into my mouth. Soon I was grabbing all sorts of food and shoving onto a plate to soon find their way into my mouth.

This wasn't healthy but it was making me feel better.

"Hey Ella," smiled Ryan stepping out from behind me.

I froze and suddenly remembered what the food had helped me forget.

He knew.

"Ella, it's ok, I know what you're going through," he insisted, how could he possibly know what I'm going through! My face boiled with anger, Rihanna's was music playing in my ears loudly, I looked desperately over to my friends, hoping one might come to my rescue and as soon I'd thought that though I was breathing heavily- hyperventilating.

"Ella, come on, calm down, I get it, you don't want anyone to know, it's just between us, honestly I understand," he cried his hand going out to touch my arm.

I gasped, "Don't- touch- me!" I stumbled back away from him; tears were beginning in my eyes, my face so red. "How can you possibly know what I'm going through, nobody knows, nobody cares."

"Ella, that's not true, I saw all your friends earlier, they're really concerned," he said earnestly, and put my head down, knowing what he said was true but I couldn't tell my friends, they'd think, they'd know I wasn't clean, know I wasn't pure like all of them. He continued, "And you're not the only girl who's b-"

"DON'T SAY IT!" I screamed desperately.

A new song I didn't recognise was playing in my ears and everything was dark. I couldn't see Ryan's face, he couldn't see mine, I let go, letting the tears flow more freely.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to upset you like this," he sighed, "I know this is hard, my sister found it so hard, it still bothers her but she handles it much better now. What bothers her the most that she let him do it to another girl before she spoke out- one of her friends. She just wants revenge, he's in prison now but she doesn't feel like she has closure."

He talks about it so casually. How can he do this? He doesn't understand.

"The last thing I want is revenge- that was already taken care of" I said bitterly... I wanted to go on but I didn't. I never talked about this, not even to my counsellor.

"You don't have to tell me, but I know talking about it helps, maybe I'm not the right person, maybe you should talk to one of your friends, someone you trust," he suggested in a caring voice.

"No!" I yelled. I breathed deeply and turned my head to the side, towards the food and away from all the happy, dancing people, I couldn't take it. "I can't tell my friends, they won't... it won't be the same."

Ryan said gently, "But Ella, look at yourself, look at today, already nothing is the same, don't you think they should know why."

"It's not just that, I'm not..." I began preparing myself to admit something I hadn't said to anyone before. But I needed to; I needed to get it out into the open.

Suddenly Sander was here marching angrily up to Ryan, clenching his fists.

I didn't know what was going on, I was terrified, of what I wasn't sure so I cried, "Sander what are you..."

Before I could finish the sentence Ryan was on the floor. Sander had hit him.

I could barely process what happened but other people were approaching. I was still so scared and vulnerable- so I ran.

I didn't know where I was going but soon I found a building, it was small and I walked in a found toilets and showers. There was a lock on the door even though the whole thing was public- probably to keep boys out.

Soon I heard the others banging on the door, yelling for me to come outside. I approached the sinks, turned on the tap and splashed some water on my face.

I wasn't sure what was going on. Everything seemed so unreal. So I began to sing...

"Oh yeah they call me the recluse
Cause I don't go outside for nothing
No one, is gonna make me leave this room
Oh no they can't tell me nothing, no way

You see I'm being a fool
It gets so I don't care about being cool
What's it to you?
If I just stay here in this hole that I've fallen into

I kept singing while just staring into that mirror, looking into my red watery eyes and feeling so scared and insecure and vulnerable, I hate feeling vulnerable.

Oh yeah they call me the recluse
Cause I don't go outside for nothing
No one is gonna make me leave this room
Oh no they can't tell me nothing, no way

You see I ain't thinking clear
It's gets so I don't know I'm feeling sorry for myself
But why should you interfere?
Would you really know what is and isn't good for my health?

Why don't you leave me alone
Oh I ain't hurting no body why you up in my face?
Get up out my soul
Why can't you let me get through my time this way?

Oh yeah they call me the recluse
Cause I don't go outside for nothing
No one, is gonna make me leave this room
Oh no they can't tell me nothing
No way, No way, Heyy
Can't tell me nothing
They can't tell me nothing
They can't tell me nothing

I sang the next part with my back against the door, I could hear heaving breathing but nothing else, nothing except my voice. I knew my friends were in shock and were scared but they weren't as scared as I was.

Sitting here by myself, looking round at myself
Thinking I don't want to go out there
I don't need no help looking after myself,
I got everything I need right here
I ain't trying to impress anyone in this messed up world I just don't care
I ain't gotta smell fresh for nobody so I'm blessed not washing my skin or my hair
They can call me the recluse they ain't gonna remove or cut me lose from this place I'm locked in hidin'
Like a rocker wall moves cause you know I've gotten used to this space that I'm occupying
There really ain't anything out there but the wind that he'd enjoy more than seeing me crying
So I do it in my room where none of these goons can see me though I know they've been trying
I ain't cut out for this shit
I'm a coward I admit
I ain't never been no big thing
The thought of killing makes me sick
But I don't want to be no victim
No way not again
So I just stay in this room like I'm bricked in
and hope that it stops me from getting hurt again
Even if it earns me this nickname with my friends

Oh yeah they call me the recluse
Cause I don't go outside for nothing
No one is gonna make me leave this room
Oh no they can't tell me nothing

Oh yeah they call me the recluse
Cause I don't go outside for nothing
No one is gonna make me leave this room
Oh no they can't tell me nothing"

Tess' POV

We had no clue what was going on. Sander had just punched a guy, Ella had ran off and we had all ran after her. She'd locked herself in the toilets and just as we got there started to sing.

"Wow, she's amazing," stated Caitlyn.

I had to agree. I couldn't ever remember her singing this well before and she wrote her own songs too, it was deep if kind of depressing.

"This is better than glee," commented Finn, her and Eoin stood a bit behind us all eating a bowl of popcorn (they'd actually stolen a whole bowl of popcorn off the snack table).

I yelled, "This isn't a TV show, this is real life, Ella's life," then I only realised it as I said it quietly, "Something bad has happened to her."

They both looked pretty taken back. Then I started crying, well more sobbing, stressed out not just over Ella but over my stupid half siblings and how I didn't hate them but I did.

I stumbled away, turning round and knocked right into some guy.

"Hey, watch where you're going!" I yelled angry at him even though it was my fault.

Looking up to face the guy I realised it was East, Christos McClure's kid, great way to get on his good side, a place anyone who wanted to be successful really wanted to be. Though I wasn't really sure if I wanted to be on East McClure's good side, I'd read in magazines some of the things girls has to do to get on his good side. I didn't go that low.

"Sorry," he mumbled, kind of bashful.

Ignoring my better judgement I smiled at him, no matter if he was a man whore or not he was still pretty cute. But no, he's a man whore so I really should walk away.

Before I could walk away, which honest to god I was going to, he grabbed my wrists and pulled me closer to him. I had no clue what was happening. Then he said, "Are you ok? Have you been crying?"

"Uh oh, yeah," I mumbled embarrassed by the fact he'd knew I'd been crying and about close he was, if I had been watching this I would've yelled "get a room" but this was me so I explained, "Well Ella's really upset, it's getting me down."

"Oh, are you sure that's all?" he asked.

I mumbled yes but gave it away by looking back at Finn and Eoin.

"Are they your brother and sister?" he wondered, or more like assumed.

"HALF," I corrected loudly and clearly, "Half brother and sister, and they're complete insensitive bitches, well the girl is anyway but the guy is too nice and..." I trailed, realising I was blabbering on to a complete stranger (who is a man whore) and that the twins could probably hear us.

"Don't worry, my sisters a bitch too and I'm pretty sure she's worst," he said, I figured he was talking about North or Nora or whatever her name was; "Do you want to go for a walk?"

I nodded and we were walking before I realised what the hell I was doing.

MAN WHORE!

Caitlyn's POV

Tess' exchange with her half brother and sister was awkward but after she walked off they just continued to eat popcorn as if nothing had happened. They are cool people.

Luke rushed up yelling, "What happened? Everyone was just congratulating me and I was just about to make a speech about camp and then this loser goes and punches another loser and now some freak is crying in our toilets!"

I smacked him hard around the head.

"Luke don't be a git, something is seriously wrong with Ella!" I screamed at him.

"Sorry," he whispered in shock that I'd hit and yelled at him and it hadn't just been playful teasing, "Let's go get a drink."

I got this as code for lets go talk in private so your friends don't figure out we're best friends and followed him towards the stage. As we were walking away Mitchie gave me a "why is he being so nice to you" look I shrugged my shoulders casually and mouthed "just go with it". She didn't seem suspicious after that.

We walked round to the back of the stage and he pulled me in for a hug.

"Are you ok?" he asked, I nodded, he apologised, "I'm sorry for being insensitive earlier; I guess when I'm not with you like normal I go back to being really selfish."

I teased, "As supposed to being just selfish like you are now."

"Oh, you," he laughed in that joking way.

"Oh you," I replied in that same teasing, happy tone. Then I changed and admitted, "I'm really worried about Ella, she's never been like this before."

He sighed, "Don't worry, she has great friends, like you, and we're at music camps, you can deal with anything by singing about it here."

I gave him a small smile at that, he kissed my forehead and repeated, "Don't worry."

I blushed, he hadn't kissed my forehead before, but it was Luke, it didn't mean anything, it was just my best friend comforting me, right?


What an ending! Laitlyn is developing so quickly I can't write it down fast enough. A harmless, caring kiss on the forehead, means nothing between two best friends right? As always, I would love to hear your opinons on Laitlyn.

Next I dedicated a small part of this chapter to developing Tess and her siblings relationship but ended up just introducing Tess' love interest too. Possibly at least. What do you think? (I love saying the words man whore!)

Then of course the start was all about Ella again, I felt so bad writing it, hopefully you can understand how she feels and what did you think of the song? (I love Plan B) And of course what do you think of Ryan and Sander punching him!

Next chapter shall probably be the last bonfire chapter, probably, and they'll probably perform in it. Ideas?

Thank you for reading and please review. Next update should be this weekend, earliest friday, lastest sunday.