Do I see a couple unexpected arrivals in the future? And is that bacon I smell?
Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight.
"Shit," I said quietly, or at least I thought so.
"What's wrong?"
"Alice is calling. I think she knows that I slipped up," I said, I'm pretty sure that my eyes got really, really huge.
"I'm sure it won't be that bad, it's just a shopping trip," Edward said, walking up behind me as I stared at my buzzing phone in horror.
"But you don't understand," I complained, turning around, "It's torture! All day on your feet, taking cloths on and off, on and off again. And not to mention all of the shoes! And sometimes we go to a spa. Oh, and then there's the times when the drag me into Victoria's Secret."
I saw his eyes light up, "Really?"
"I shouldn't have had that hot kitchen sex with you. Now I will suffer. Damn you, Edward Cullen, damn you," I scolded.
"The food's getting cold," he said to me, pulling me towards the table where the really, really good smelling food was sitting.
"I'm not going to forgive you," I warned him.
"Uh-huh," he said, giving me a pointed look. I stuck my tongue out at him.
"Don't do that, Bella, or else I just might have to kiss you," Edward warned, I laughed.
"Seriously, this means that you're going to have to give me a back rub every day for the next week and give me a couple of foot rubs," I informed Edward.
"I'll take it. And you'll let me sleep in our room?" he asked.
"Maybe. I'm considering it," I told him, crossing my arms as I sat down.
"Good. Now, let's get to eating food," he said. I saw a twinkle showed up in his eyes, "Can I feed you?"
"You'll just spill things on me."
"I promise I won't spill anything on you," he vowed
"Okay."
Edward grinned like a little boy as he scooted over to sit next to me. He picked up a spoon of soup and fed it to me. I think I let out a really, really loud moan.
"That good, huh? Maybe I should cook for you more often," Edward said, causing me to snort. I promise that it was a rather lady-like sound.
"Oh, shut up and feed me. I'm hungry after that intense physical work out," I said.
"Good to hear it," he said.
Dean and Angie POV:
Angie, I did it!
You did it?
Yup, I managed to get Bella and Edward to have hot sex, and in the process stick her in the torturous situation of shopping.
You know what, things will be okay. She'll at least get some pretty nice things to wear for Edward. Hey, was this part of your evil plan? *Angie eyes Dean suspiciously*
So, you see what I was trying to accomplish …
You don't sound so sure of yourself there.
Uh, well … um …
BPOV
When we finally got back to our house … shit. I acknowledged it as 'our' house. Anyway, I walked into the living room and spread out, laying on top of Edward because he was already sitting there.
"Watcha watching?" I asked.
"Spongebob Squarepants."
"Seriously? Didn't take you for someone that likes children's cartoons," I told him.
"You don't like them?" he asked.
"Of course I do! I would have to be crazy not to!" I exclaimed.
"I knew I was right when I married you," he said to me, kissing me on the forehead.
"Eww … I felt your spit," I wiped it off my forehead, "Good thing you're growing on me."
"Oh, so I'm made a dent in the hull of your stubborn personality! I knew you'd see reason," he told me, nodding seriously.
"It's more like a small hole. I'm not punishing you too severely for seducing me and causing me to attempt to survive a very painful shopping trip with Alice and Rosalie," I told him.
"I'm glad to hear that. But not the painful shopping trip part," he said to me.
"Of course."
The two of us laid on the couch for a few hours, just enjoying the silent company as we watched the pointless childrens TV shows. But yet we laughed. Out of nowhere Edwards head bent down to capture my lips in his, he kissed me long and deep, so when we parted I was panting for breath. I saw Edward's eyes get wide, I looked at him, rather confused when I heard a throat clear and I turned around, seeing my bear of a brother, Emmett.
"Emmy Bear!" I cried, jumping up and running to give him a huge hug, he, of course, picked me up and spun me around a couple of times, succeeding in making me obnoxiously dizzy. It wasn't very nice of him to do that.
"Bells! It's so good to see you. But first things first. Who is that guy?" Emmett asked me.
"He's my husband," I said, rubbing the back of my neck nervously with a sheepish smile.
"Of course. And when did this happen and why wasn't I invited to the wedding?" he asked, putting his hands on his hips and setting himself in the position an annoyed thirteen year old girl would stand in.
"This happened about a month ago and we got married drunkenly in Vegas, so, no one was really invited," I explained.
"Okay … Now, where are my video games?" he asked, bouncing on the balls of his feet. "But don't think I'm done with you, Bella, it's just that I haven't seen these games in forever and you know how much I love them."
"I know, follow me."
And so my day moved forward. Emmett played video games for the rest of the night while I talked to Edward. Emmett's arrival meant that Edward was going to have to share my bed with me. Or I could make him sleep on the floor … but as I admitted before, he had made a small hole in the hull of my ship, so I wasn't going to be able to force him out of it or anything. I told Edward to move his stuff into my room as soon as Emmett was raiding the fridge. Sooner rather than later, it was time for us to all fall asleep. It would be the first night that I slept with Edward, literally slept, like dreaming slept, willingly.
When I was about to slip into sleep, I felt Edwards body press up against my back, pulling me close to him. I smiled to myself and soon I was fast asleep in my husbands arms. And god damn it, he was making me fall in love with him.
EPOV
Well, things are going much better than I expected. Bella is actually letting me in, I'm sleeping with her, and she's stopped resisting so much. I feel like I'm in a rather good place right now. Bella shifted a little in my arms, mumbling something about fluffy stools and singing textbooks.
I can't believe I got so lucky.
Ever since I saw Bella at that first function for some author called Maddy Mang, I fell in love. I don't think Bella ever even glanced in my direction, but I certainly noticed her. That author never showed at those things, but Bella did. Apparently, she was there to represent the author since Maddy Mang could never actually make it.
I loved watching her talk to all of the people there, dealing with them so naturally, like it was what she was born to do. I smiled as I looked down at her. She looked so peaceful, even if she was talking about dancing scarfs in her sleep.
I was about to slip into sleep myself when I heard her whisper my name, my chest swelled and I thought for a moment my heart would burst out of my chest. She rolled over, snuggling into me as she unconsciously threw a leg over mine as my name escaped her lips once more. I chuckled, placing a kiss on her head before I fell asleep.
BPOV
Ah, shit. Edward's in my bed isn't he? And I was liking it.
I wasn't aware of my surroundings at first, but that didn't really matter. It took me a few seconds before I realized that my head was nestled in Edwards chest and my leg was thrown over his. His arms were holding me tightly to him. It was time for me to get up. Cuz I was hungry and I wanted some bacon.
When I started to wiggle out of his arms, they only pulled me closer, tightening around my waist. I growled to myself as I got myself out of his death grip. I ended up falling off of the bed by doing a backwards summer-salt. Landing hurt. I stood up quickly, though, and tip-toed out of the room. If Edward woke up before I got out of there he probably would pull me back to bed and hold me hostage.
Now, where did I put the bacon?
Since Emmett was visiting, I knew I was going to have to make all of what I had, and probably duel Emmett for the last few pieces, otherwise he would eat them all. He never did learn how to share properly. This would end up being rather interesting. So, I started making the bacon and as soon as I finished the first round I counted to ten before I heard Emmett thunder down the stairs yell "BACON!" at the top of his lungs.
"Geez, Emmett, it's still early, don't yell," I scolded.
"But there's bacon, Bells," he pouted.
"And I get this batch because I know you'll eat the rest. You don't have to share with Edward, Emmett, at least be grateful for that."
"Fine. Be that way. Just get me my bacon, woman!"
"Do you want me to hit you?" I asked, placing the next round in the microwave as I grabbed a piece of bacon from my plate and munched on it.
"Nope. But hey, you know I like bugging you," he said.
"I know, I grew up with you, remember?" I told him.
The next round was released and Emmett consumed it. Once the last of it was made, the show down began. I was honestly surprised, though, that Edward hadn't woken up yet. "Emmett, I challenge you to a duel for the last five pieces of bacon, do you back out like a wuss or meet the challenge like a man?"
"I choose to meet the challenge! I will save you, fair bacon!" he cried, "Now, where are the foam swords?"
"It the closet," I told him. He nodded and brought them out, handing one to me.
"First one to get their head chopped off loses, ready?" I said, Emmett nodded and we were then sword fighting each other for bacon. I was cutting off Emmett's left leg when Edward came down the stairs. I was facing the stairs, so I got to see the wonderful look of confusion on his face when he saw Emmett and I fighting. I started laughing, giving Emmett the opportunity to chop off my head.
"Ah! Victory is mine!" Emmett said, doing a happy dance. He picked up a piece of bacon and was about to eat it when I jumped on him, grabbing the bacon from him and eating it myself.
"Hey! No fair!" he yelled at me.
"It's a bacon war, there ain't anything fair about bacon wars fought with foam swords."
"I'll take the last of it," Edward said, grabbing the last of the bacon and breaking up Emmett and my fun. I was tempted to jump on him and steal it back.
Do it.
Bella, don't make a fool of yourself anymore than you already have. Besides, you should eat something else besides bacon.
Damn. Angie was right.
"Edward! I command ye to make some omelets!" I said.
"Yes, my queen," he bowed to me. I smiled at him as he cooked breakfast for Emmett and me while Em and I caught up. It was nice. I hadn't had a fight over bacon in ages, and I think that was just what I needed.
Emmett was currently out and about, searching for the best place for us to eat tonight. I told him we could just order in, but he didn't agree with me. Now, I was just waiting for him to come back home and tell me 'fine, we'll order pizza, but we better be ordering a lot of it because I'm hungry', and then crossing his arms across his chest and stamping his foot. Gotta love the two-year-old Emmett.
That meant, right now, I was alone with Edward. And he was staring at me with an entirely perplexed look. It was just beginning to make me uncomfortable. "Stop staring at me," I ordered after it had gone on too long.
"I'm not so inclined to," he told me, smiling at me. God damn it, he was smiling. And I really liked that smile. It melted my insides.
Don't be such a sap, Bella.
Shut up, Dean, I think it's adorable.
Will you two shut up? I don't need you commenting on my life right now, thank you very much.
You're not getting rid of us that easily, Bella. This is only encouraging me.
I'm so sorry you have to put up with him, Bella.
Leave me alone, right now, or else I figure out a way for you too suffer. Maybe I'll start mentally singing Brittney Spears songs, how about that?
NOOOO! Anything but Brittney Spears!
Calm down, Dean. Not EVERYTHING she does is terrible.
True. But she did shave her head.
You've got a point there …
I shook my head, clearing my mind and began to be slightly embarrassed that I had a conversation with Dean and Angie. Damn, I going more and more insane. Maybe that's why Edwards growing on me.
I heard Edward take a breath and then his voice speaking to me, "You're a mystery to me, Bella."
"Good. Let's keep it that way," I told him, nodding.
"It's a good thing," he told me.
"Well then, I guess I should start filling you in on what's going on in my mind … but I think it would frighten you so much that you would curl up and die just from hearing me utter the words to describe what's going on in there," I told him.
"Of cource, you're definitely out of your mind," he replied.
"You bet your ass I am. It's dark and scary in there. You have no idea some of the things that like to manifest in there," I shivered.
Like me!
Leave her alone.
Fine.
"Like what?" he asked, looking at me curiously.
"Robotic monkeys taking over the world. Or, I guess Cyber Men coming to take all of our brains out and stick them in bodies to make us like them. That stuff is really creepy. Don't you think?"
"Sure, of course," Edward said to me. Hmm. I guess he didn't catch the reference. Or maybe he did, and didn't want to add on. If not, well, I'd have to educate him if he still stuck around.
"Now, excues me as I wait for Emmett at the door to tell him 'I told you so'." I stood up and walked to the front door. Edward followed behind me, wrapping his arms around my waist when I stopped walking.
"Did I say you could come with me?" I asked him.
"Nope, but I don't really think that you could get rid of me if you tried." He placed a kiss on the top of my head.
"Eww … Edward cooties …," I trailed off just as Emmett burst back into the house.
"Bella! Where's the phone! We need pizza! And you're paying …," he yelled/sang to me.
"I told you so!" I said back to him, "And the phones over there, the number next to it. Go crazy, as long as you'll finish everything you order, I'm good with it. Now hurry your big ass up because I'm hungry and I want to send you and Edward off to go pick up a movie, okay?"
"Sounds good to me," Emmett said, starting to dial the phone.
"Bella, is he going to give me the 'hurt her and you die' talk?" Edward asked me, whispering in my ear.
"I'm giving him the opportunity, what kind of unwilling wife would I be if I didn't? And if you're a persistent, annoying, butt face, of a husband, you'll put up with it. And help him pick something out. Here's whats going to happen, when you pick out the movie, you will pick out a chick flick. Got it? If you get a horror movie I promise either you or Emmett will lose your hand because I'm squeezing it so tight," I told him, "Also, you're sleeping on the couch if you get a horror. Just a heads up."
"Good to know," he pulled away from me and walked over to Emmett.
"Bell has ordered us to pick out a movie," he informed Emmett, making sure he heard the first time.
"Yeah, got that," Emmett narrowed his eyes at Edward, "Are you sure you can handle it?"
"Positive. Let's go and hurry back," Edward said, Emmett nodded in agreement.
"Hey! It's not like I'm going to get hurt if I'm home alone," I said.
"Sure," they said at the same time. Emmett looked at Edward and snorted. Edward rolled his eyes.
"But seriously, go, now, or I'll kick both of your asses."
"Alright, alright, we'll go. See you in a few, Bella," Emmett said, heading towards his car. Edward following behind. I let out my best maniacal laughter. Emmett would disapprove of Edward when he saw what he was like, and then he would beat him up and get him to leave him alone. And evil smile crossed my face.
Hey, she's learning.
It's not a good thing she's learning, Dean.
Stop talking about me like I'm not even here.
Fine.
Fine.
I heard the door bell ring about ten minutes later and walked over to receive the monstrous amount of pizzas and whatever else Emmett decided that we were going to eat for dinner. I opened the door and guess who was there again.
Awh, Shit.
It's Jake.
My sentiments exactly.
This is my LAST UPDATE for the next THREE WEEKS. I'm sorry I'm not going to be able to update, but life happens. Oh, and if you review (which is a really, really awesome thing to do) if you can tell me what Bella is referenceing when she talks about Cyber Men. All who get's it right will have the next chapter dedicated to them. So ... I hope you enjoyed the chapter and I hope you review. :) (I smile at you)
