I dug my fingernails into the floorboard and with a couple of tries picked up the loose board, but what I recovered underneath the floor made me drop the piece of wood I was holding. My hands were trembling as I reached for the contents I had just discovered. The pictures and a blank labeled CD were laying there. I grabbed the pictures out and turned then over in my hands, they were the ones from the camera I received for my birthday, the pictures from the last days with Edward. I picked up the CD next and stared at the back of it letting my room's light glare off of it to make sure it wasn't a blank, there was writing on it. Uncontrollable sobs ran down my eyes, I couldn't catch my breath I sat there on my knees rocking back and forth pressing the contents of the floor against my chest so hard. I stayed like that for minutes, every few seconds glancing down at the pictures and pressing them against my chest over and over.

Eventually I worked up enough strength to make my way over to the bed, both hands still holding the pictures and CD. I opened my CD player and with shaking hands put the disc inside. I hesitated though before I pushed play, what would the consequences be when I did push play, would all of this throw me back into my state of being before Jacob? It only took me a second to decide that I didn't care. I pushed play and my lullaby started.

I screamed, not in agony but in sadness, I was crying loudly almost drowning out my lullaby I placed the pictures of Edward on my bed and kept my eyes on them and at least one finger on them in case they decided to mysteriously float away. The CD player was on repeat as I listened through the entire CD again and again, and each time it restarted, my crying grew quieter.

Why did he leave these here, why in the floorboards? Was I supposed to find them? Was he too lazy to really do away with them? Did they hold some other sort of meaning? Why?

The same questions ran through my head, all without answers. I lost count of how many times the CD repeated, but eventually my eyes fluttered closed and my crying was just a sniffle, I exhausted myself from crying so much, I drifted to sleep.

I woke up when I heard the phone ring. I glanced at the clock, 1:00 o'clock, it must be Charlie. I gasped remembering the pictures as my lullaby still played. I paused the stereo and picked up the pictures that were next to me. I jumped out of bed, pictures in hand and turned around and glanced at my CD player, I thought for a second to take the CD out and with me but decided that would be going too far. I raced downstairs and answered the phone.

"Did I wake you?" Charlie asked.

"Yeah I hope you didn't try calling a lot, I was pretty out." I certainly sounded awful, my throat groggy from crying.

"You don't sound too good Bella; I hope you aren't getting the flu. I don't think it has been going around school, has it?"

"No dad, I don't think it has, I don't feel that bad." He had no idea how I felt.

"Alright, well I'll be home tonight, don't fix dinner, I can pick something up for both of us, if you feel like eating."

"Okay dad thanks, I'll see you tonight."

I hung up the phone and raced up the stairs back to my room.

The CD was still in the stereo. I sat there staring down as I could see the revolutions of the disc spin round and round. I drifted back to my previous thoughts before I fell asleep. Why did he leave these? I should accept my first notion that he wouldn't think I would be smart enough to dig up the floor to look for them, but what if there was more reason for this action? Why? I pondered for a while but had to stop before the pain in my heart made me physically ill. I lay back onto my pillows again and stared at the pictures. The picture I kept in my mind did no justice to the picture of him I was holding now.

A few hours passed as I lye there being flooded by my memories of him. I let my lullaby play over and over; my cheeks were getting raw from wiping away all the tears. I glanced over at my alarm clock, 3:00 o' clock; school will be getting out soon. Hopefully they had a recount of ballots today and found out that my nomination wasn't correct, I would happily accept that mistake.