Chapter 11: A Teachers Wedding

The day of Genslinger's wedding had arrived, Schmidt was over excited as was Winston. Jess was sat on her bed religiously smoothing her navy blue dress over her thighs, Schmidt had once again been directing her on how to shave her limbs. Since the overly awkward visit from Nick she had completely withdrawn herself from everyone, playing the last few weeks over and over in her head, torturing herself. That was until Cece came in, guns blazing,

"Hey Jess. I hope your ready. Time to go!"

Cece entered her room looking beautiful as usual, a deep red dress clung to her curves in all the right places. She was sure Schmidt had passed out somewhere, thanking god he was now allowed to take her best friend to public events.

Standing up she looked at herself in the mirror. To say she had been wallowing around the flat for the last few days she looked pretty good. Her hair was down and flowing and her navy blue strapless dress showcased her figure elegantly. After completing a spin for Cece she grabbed her bag and followed her friend out of the door.

On her way to the front door she peeked into Nick's old room. The new tenant hadn't moved in yet due to issues with their current landlord, which made Jess wonder if they had chosen the right candidate. Before they could leave the apartment, she began to panic,

"I'm sorry guys, I don't think I can do this. I mean, I'm still really bummed were a man down."

Schmidt nodded for Cece and Winston to continue to the lift whilst he helped his friend,

"Come on Jess. Nick isn't going to be there. He wasn't here when we got the invitation, remember?"

She slowly started to nod, her eyes slowly reaching Schmidt's,

"I suppose I could do with some fresh air.."

He locked the door behind them and slowly ushered her to the lift where Cece and Winston were holding the doors open,

"Yes you do Jess. Just think, fresh air, canapés, champagne and maybe even some dancing."

She smiled. Maybe this is what she needed, alcohol and time with her friends. She turned to Winston who was now pressing the ground floor button,

"Hey, do you think Paul will sing? I mean, he does have a lovely singing voice..."

He shrugged, an image of Paul singing the Bohemian Rhapsody made him feel a little uneasy,

"Actually, I'm more concerned about him getting tooo emotional. Ugliest. Crier. Ever."


Bubbles, doves, munchkins and flowers. Thousands of flowers. She knew the wedding would be over the top but this was something else. Before she had chance to make a hasty exit, the blushing groom bounded towards them, engulfing them all in bear hugs.

"Hey guys. Thank you so much for coming!"

After he smothered her friends with his hugs he saved Jess for last, nearly suffocating her in the process,

"And Jess! Thank you! If it wasn't for you this would have never happened!"

After flashing her his biggest smile he soon noticed one of the room mates was missing,

"Oh no, where's Nick?"

Jess looked to Schmidt who had already placed his hand on Paul's shoulder,

"Look bro, Nick can't make it. He's really sick, bartenders flu. I'm sorry."

The room mates braced themselves for what they thought would be Paul's embarrassing tears but they never came as he managed to pull himself together,

"Oh ok. That really sucks. Listen, the ceremony will be starting in about ten minutes so why don't you go find your seats. Just follow the yellow brick road."

Sarcasm dripping from her words, Cece couldn't help her next sentence,

"Yellow brick road? Seriously?"

Laughing, he ushered them towards the delicately dressed chairs,

"Yeah. It's Jen's favourite movie. Go! Have fun!"

As instructed they followed his direction and were ushered into their seats. Fifth row back, far enough so if needed, Jess could knock back a few gulps if Winston's flask she had 'borrowed.'

Other guests began taking their seats and the wedding began to take shape. Schmidt and Cece were holding hands and making googly eyes at each other which made Jess immediately clutch at the flask which was hidden in her clutch. She noticed the chairs to her right were vacant which meant there was a passing out spot if needed. The music started and Somewhere Over The Rainbow filled the garden, someone tapped her on the shoulder,

"Excuse me? Can we get..."

Caroline.

How many times am I going to bump into her?

As her sworn enemy ignored her and pushed past to the vacant seats she was once again face to face with Nick.

Fantastic. Sat next to lovey dovey couple at a Wizard Of Oz wedding. Well done Jess.

The music grew louder and and the guests stood and watched as the bride walked down the yellow brick road, accompanied by her parents. After a few minutes the music faded to stop and and the guests once again took to their seats, some more comfortable than others.

The reverend had begun the traditional welcoming. Jess was now panicking, sandwiched between Cece and Caroline with nowhere to run. Well, without making a scene. She hastily pulled the flask from her clutch and took a huge swig of the liquid which as it turns out wasn't Vodka.

Her spluttering didn't interrupt the ceremony but her coughing fit after did. After what felt like an eternity and after receiving death glares from the majority of the guests her coughing subsided. She felt she had to say something,

"Sorry everyone! Please continue getting married, its great!"

Closing her eyes she sat back down, hoping the ground would swallow her whole. She looked at Winston who was whispering something to her,

"Jess is that my flask?"

Her bottom lip was out and she nodded slowly. His whisper became more serious,

"That's not Vodka, Jess! Remember my boss Joe? That is his home made moonshine!"

Immediately she regretted 'borrowing' the flask and tossed it back to Winston. Folding her arms she ignored the shocked looks from Caroline and Nick and focused back on the wedding.


The wedding though incredibly cheesy was beautiful. Jess had dabbed fiercely at her eyes ever since the vows. They were now at the reception where drinks were flowing and the sounds of Mr and Mrs Genslinger's karaoke version of Time after Time filled the tent. She had now resorted to hiding under one of the tables, swigging a bottle of champagne. She had been sat there for a while, reminiscing about how the last time at a wedding she was rescuing a drunken Nick from Caroline and the slow chicken dance.

Ah, that song is a classic!

Schmidt soon joined in on her wedding fort, his tie now undone,

"Hey Jess. How you holding up?"

It still amazed her how through all of his douche baggery ways he was a good person. She smiled and squeezed his arm, slightly fuzzy from the champagne,

"Hey Schmiddy. Can I...Can I tell you something?"

He grabbed the bottle from her, placing it out of her reach. He nodded for her to continue.

"I think I've fallen for turtle face. He makes me feel all twirly and fiery."

He said nothing as she proceeded,

"I haven't told anyone, not even Cece. I didn't know what is was until Blondie was back in the picture."

She emphasised 'Blondie' with as much disdain as she could muster,

"We were going really good. Until Caroline came back and brainwashed him."

She stopped talking as she was suddenly consumed by hiccups. Schmidt's face lit up,

"Finally Jess! The truth comes out. Winston! Damn, I owe you fifty bucks!"

Winston and Cece soon joined them under the table which had now become more cramped. He snatched the money out of his friends hand and focused his attention back to Jess,

"So you finally admitted your feelings and I'm fifty bucks richer. Thanks Jess!"

She looked to her best friend who was avoiding her gaze, she knew immediately she was once again kept out of a shenanigan,

"Cece? Cece what's going on?"

After squeezing past the guys and throwing Jess her most sympathetic look she made it to her best friend,

"Jess. Sweetie. We all kind of knew you and Nick had a weird thing going on. We just knew you had to find it out for yourself. I mean, remember what happened the last time I tried to tell you?"

Jess looked at her best friend, the champagne still tingling the back of her throat. Cece smiled and continued,

"You told him you didn't use toilet paper and spent the entire afternoon worrying about where his feet were pointed."

She couldn't quite comprehend what was going on and made a mental note to blame it on the alcohol.,

"Well, I'm glad I told you guys because I have felt horrible these last few weeks. I lost my feeling stick which made it even harder to tell you guys."

Winston flinched, realising that sooner or later he would have to confess to 'borrowing' the feeling stick to help his boss deal with his issues. Before Jess could confess the twirly kisses Genslinger popped his head into their fort,

"Hey guys. I put your names down for karaoke and its your go! Come on!"

His head disappeared and as they left the safety of their table fort their names were called by the DJ,

"Ok everybody. Please welcome Winston, Jess, Schmidt and Nick who will be singing Alright by Supergrass!"

Jess attempted to runaway but was stopped by Paul he pushed her towards the DJ who was dressed as the tin man,

"Please Jess. I wouldn't be married to the girl of my dreams if it wasn't for you. This will make a great wedding present and if I remember correctly you loved listening to Supergrass while we made lovelies."

She turned to face him, jaw open due to shock,

"Paul, seriously! You are a married man now so please stop referring back to our sexual encounters!"

She grabbed a glass of champagne and joined Winston and Schmidt on stage where four mics awaited them. To her surprise a drunken Nick had also made his way to the stage,

"The slinger! This is for you and your beloved new wife! Relationships, woo yeah!"

The music started and after shooting daggers at Nick she began to sing,

"We are young, we run green,

Keep our teeth, nice and clean,

See our friends, see the sights, feel alright,

We wake up, we go out, smoke a fag,

Put it out, see our friends,

See the sights, feel alright,

Are we like you?

I can't be sure,

Of the scene, as she turns,

We are strange in our worlds"

Schmidt and Winston, encouraged by their best friend alcohol had now joined Jess to Cece's delight. Jess was now jumping around and playing air guitar,

"But we are young, we get by,

Can't go mad, ain't got time,

Sleep around, if we like,

But we're alright,

Got some cash, bought some wheels,

Took it out, 'cross the fields,

Lost control, hit a wall,

But we're alright,

Are we like you,

I can't be sure,

Of the scene, as she turns,

We are strange in our worlds,"

Nick now had one arm around Jess and the other around Winston as he joined them in terrible unison,

"But we are young, we run green,

Keep our teeth, nice and clean,

See our friends, see the sights, feel alright,

Are we like you,

I can't be sure,

Of the scene, as she turns,

We are strange in our world,

But we are young, we run green,

Keep our teeth, nice and clean,

See our friends, see the sights, feel alright."

As the song came to a close they had all bust into their own weird dance moves to the audiences delight. Caroline watched them, arms folded.