Hey everyone. :) I apologize for the wait, but I ended up finishing chapter 11 quicker than I thought and I decided I should post it after doing my read-throughs. We'll be starting right where we left off in chapter 10, except in Leonardo's head this time. ;)
Now for the dreaded disclaimer…know what? I have written disclaimers on ever chapter so far. So let's just pick your favorite one and just –insert it here-. Sound good? Good.
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-Flashback: Leo-
"Then open the box."
Leo stared at his sensei, confusion causing him to drop his jaw to the floor. "I'm sorry?"
Master Splinter repeated himself, "Leonardo, you must open the box." There was a twinkle of amusement in his eye, as if Leo's reaction to the earlier statement was comedic somehow.
Leo failed to see the humor, and he couldn't help asking, "May I ask…why?" His mind struggled to kick start itself back into working condition. 'Didn't he just say that if the box opened I'd lose myself? Why would he—'
"Leonardo, I understand your confusion. I have a theory that if you open the box yourself then the crisis will be averted."
As that reply sunk into him Leo found that he felt hurt, scared and betrayed. "So…this theory…will it work?" He asked timidly, fearing the answer that he guessed would greet his ears.
There was a pause before his fears were confirmed. "I do not know for certain."
"Sensei! You would have me do this without any guarantee of success?!" Leo objected, feeling his heart begin to race in panic, "What if your theory is wrong? What if my inner world collapses like your friend's did? What if I try to attack you? What if I hurt…" He couldn't bring himself to finish that statement. No, it would be like giving in to his fears, his insecurities. And Leo did make a vow to never fail Master Splinter…his father ever again.
"There is that possibility, my son." Leo heard Sensei's calm voice reach out to him. "But in the case of my friend, he was too far gone by the time I realized it. His had already started to crumble. That is why I believe this will work. You are strong, stronger than you realize." Leo felt the warm glow of pride at the compliment, a small grin spreading across his face. "I believe that if you open the box, and are able to conquer your feelings, that your inner world will become more stable than even my own."
Leo took in a deep breath, steeling his nerves as he confirmed, "All I have to do is open the box, right Sensei?"
"Theoretically…yes, my son."
The slightest shudder passed through him as he reached out to the box, hesitating for the briefest moments as Leo asked, "Sensei? Whatever happens to me…Please tell everyone that I…" His voice died, and he cast a desperate glance upon his father.
His father bowed his head slightly as he stated "Of course. Just know that it's twofold, Leonardo." When his father raised his head, their eyes met. Leo noticed the depth of the love his father had for him, and he had to struggle to look away and concentrate on the task at hand. 'Not now' he reprimanded himself. 'You have a task to complete.' Narrowing his eyes, he channeled his willpower into the twin forms of his beloved katana and with a swift jab into the lock the box burst open.
The first thing that Leo noticed was that his headache intensified, causing him to close his eyes tight to prevent them from watering. And then it completely vanished, leaving him feeling empty. A startled gasp erupting from his sensei caused Leo to open his eyes, and stare in shock at what stood before him.
"Is that…me?" He stuttered, staring fixedly on the figure before him. It…looked like him. A lot like him. In fact, Leo thought that he was staring at his own reflection in a mirror, except that the figure was staring at the floor before him. The figure even held a pair of katana, just like he did! And then the figure lifted its head and Leo noticed the first clear difference between them. The figure's eyes were completely solid black!
The figure spoke, its voice layered thick with malevolence, "Well, if it isn't the supreme ruler of this world? How lovely it is to meet you. Call me Kage." Kage smirked, his expression just as mocking as his words.
Leo suppressed a shudder. Everything about Kage felt wrong. "Who are you? What are you doing here?" He growled, trying desperately to hide his unease from both his father and this Kage.
"I told you. I'm Kage. Think of me as the embodiment of your true feelings. And I'm here because you so foolishly tried to seal me away. I don't take kindly to such insolence and rudeness. Especially not from one so weak and frightened as you, you little brat!" Kage spat as he glared intensely at Leo. "And don't even try to hide your fear from me. I know everything about you. I am the real you."
Startled, Leo glanced over at his father who was observing Kage with narrowed eyes. If Leo ever wanted his father's advice, it would be at this very moment. 'What am I supposed to do?' He thought frantically, watching his father for any signal that would indicate the correct path to take.
After about a minute of silence, Kage's laughter rang out, bringing Leo's attention back to him. "Hahahaha! And this is why you are a little brat! You are so reliant on your Daddy it's pathetic! I'm embarrassed to be a part of you! Always seeking his approval, terrified of disappointing him, worshipping the ground he walks on. Well guess what? Your precious Sensei isn't as perfect as you think he is! And deep down, you know he loves your brothers more than he loves you. You're the oldest, the perfect bodyguard for his truly precious children! Your loyalty is nothing but a –"
"Shut up!" Leo yelled, interrupting Kage's mocking words, his decision made on what he needed to do. It was not so much due to the way Kage's words stung him, he had expected as much from the malignant figure. Instead it was the way Kage was attempting to dishonor his father who looked like he had been stabbed in the heart that cured Leo of his indecision. Tightening his grip on the handles of his katana, Leo stood, facing Kage with a heated glare. Leo's fury was screaming at him 'Let me at him! I'll destroy him!' but Leo kept it leashed tight as he growled ominously, "I will not allow you to say another word against my Sensei! You are not worthy of being in his presence! If you don't leave on your own" he crouched into a battle-ready position, "then I'll make you leave."
"Leonardo," he heard Sensei protest, "you aren't prepared for battle! You've only been training for three months with your katana! That isn't enough time! I order you to stand down!"
Kage smirked at Leo and mocked, "Well, I guess you'll just have to do what Daddy says. You wouldn't want to disappoint your idol, would you?"
Leo cast an apologetic look at Sensei. "Gomen ne, Sensei. I can't obey that order. Please understand."
Master Splinter shook his head slowly before stating, "Then I will stay here and watch."
"Sensei, go back to my brothers. I'm sure they have questions. I will beat Kage, I promise."
There was a long silence before Leo heard his father ask "Hountou ni?"
A huge smile on his face, Leo gave his dad a thumb's up as he replied, "Zettai ni. I'll be home soon."
Leo watched his father's face change from defeat to a confident determination as he said, "Very well. But you will have to clean the kitchen as punishment for disobeying my orders, my son." With that, his father left.
Leo let himself revel in the knowledge that his Sensei believed in him. He knew he thrived on his father's praise, and criticism always hit him hard. He had grown to accept that part of himself. When he heard Kage clear his throat in a very self-important manner, Leo turned a glare in the figure's direction.
Kage let out an impressed whistle. "Well well. I never thought I'd see the day when you disobeyed your 'god'. I must say I'm impressed that you had the ability to feel happy for a brief moment. You know he is secretly glad to be rid of you, don't you? Not that he'd ever say that out loud, of course. Oh no, it wouldn't do for the loyal guard dog to suddenly resent the master." Kage stopped to observe how Leo was taking his taunts.
"Are you done?" Leo growled, his eyes blazing with the desire to clash swords with the monster in front of him. "You may as well get it all out now. Because soon, you won't have much to say."
Kage scoffed, "Hah! As if you had any real control of the situation! I'm sorry, Your Highness, but there is no way you can defeat me."
"And why is that?"
"Why, I told you already. I know everything about you. All the skills you have trained to master, I know them as well. Not only that," Kage gave Leo a condescending smile, "I know how to hurt you."
That gave Leo pause, but only for the tiniest second. 'I swore that I would beat Kage! I promised!' "Heh. You never know until you try!" Tightening his grip on his katana, he leapt forward, preparing to swing downward at Kage's unprotected arm.
And suddenly, it wasn't Kage standing before him. It was Raph!
Leo stopped himself, stumbling backward as his confused mind struggled to make sense of the change. "But…weren't you…huh?"
Kage's voice came from Raph's body, "See how foolish you are? How many times must I repeat myself before you finally understand? I know EVERYTHING about you. I know your deepest fears, your biggest regrets, and your inner desires. I know what makes you tick, and I am able to use that to unhinge and destroy you. Remember your sensei's friend? He tried to do the same thing you are doing right now. And he failed! Let's not forget your 'perfect sensei' either. He had nearly fallen into the same trap when he lost his wife and daughter! But then he found all of you turtles, sparing him the same fate. And now you, my dear Leonardo, are caught up in my web."
"How-?"
"How do I know about Splinter's near fall from grace? It is because I, Kage, reside in every single living person or animal as an existential being of this realm. I have no real face because it changes depending on where I'm summoned to be. While I am in your inner world, for example, I appear as you. And then I can shift my appearance to defeat those who foolishly attempt to control me."
Leo blinked, "Ok. So how would I control you?"
Kage snorted, "How amusing. Very well. You must pass a test."
"A test?" Leo asked warily.
"Yes. But first you should know that if you slay me, than you will be incapable of showing any emotion for the rest of your life. You'd become like a machine."
Leo nodded, "Very well. Tell me more."
Kage grinned, "You need to defeat me. Simple as that."
Leo raised a brow incredulously, "Really?"
"Yep. That's it. You should know that no one has ever passed before. Of course, you could always just skip and live the rest of your life the way it is now."
"What'd happen if I did that?"
"Well, I would always be here. Any time you became too emotionally stressed, I would completely take over. And there's no clue what would happen then." Kage paused as he witnessed the expression on Leo's face turn to concern. He smirked as he continued, "As for your brothers, since they didn't try to seal me away like you did, you don't need to worry about me controlling them. No, only you have to live with this."
"And if I am unable to pass the test?"
"Well that's simple really. I will destroy the foundations of your inner world, and you will be crushed. Your will would cease to exist, and you would be forced to watch yourself commit horrid acts until you are put out of your misery. You still sure you want to try?"
Leo stared at his hands holding the katana blades, feeling disgust and fear as he found that he absolutely hated his hands. They were responsible for hurting Raph, for traumatizing Mikey and Donnie, for bringing Kage into his life and thus allowing for Sensei's honor to be dragged through the mud. The thought of ever possibly losing control of himself around his family was more than he could handle. "If I don't defeat you, either by ignoring you or losing to you, then my family will be at risk. It's not about trying anymore, but a matter of doing. And I made a promise to my father that I would defeat you, and I swore never to fail my father by endangering my family. This is my burden to bear, no one else's." Determination rushed through him as he declared, "Prepare to lose, Kage! There isn't anything I wouldn't do for my family!"
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Dun dun dun! Hahaha! I hope this chapter makes up for the wait ;) I personally really enjoyed Leo's little declaration at the end there. I think our young Leonardo is turning into quite the fine young lad, wouldn't you agree? Next chapter will have action! Yay! Lol. Let me know what thoughts you may have! :D
-Ariane
