As always I would like to thank you all for your reviews, but it's been a few weeks since I started to write on FF and some of you are especially loyal, so special thanks go out to Elena Zanettini and sweetBitterKH who review not only Adore You regularly but also were a big support during my first story.
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ADORE YOU
Chapter 11 - The In-Between
"You're kidding me, aren't you? Granger..." George stared at her with his mouth wide open, one arm still casually around her shoulder.
"You can't tell anyone."
"Are you crazy? Ron behaved like an idiot, plus he lied to all of us. He said, he never confessed to you and that you two fought because of Romilda."
"Well, half of it is true..." Hermione tried, but George shook his head vehemently.
"No, you have no idea what Ron has done. It's-" He jumped up and started to pace the small corridor between the stairs. "Why didn't you tell us when it happened? We would have set Ron straight in no time."
"That's exactly why," Hermione gestured at his pacing. "I didn't want you to fight with him too. Ron and I both said awful things to each other and I moved to Paris two days later. If I had told you, I would have left a battlefield. It really wouldn't have been worth it. It was our fight, our problem. And I basically tried to force him to decide between me and his girlfriend, so I'm not much better."
"Of course you are! Romilda was-"
"-his girlfriend and he loved her, no matter how annoying and mean she was."
"But Hermione... Fred-" George looked pained but Hermione only sighed.
"That's another reason. I didn't want Ron and Fred to fight because of me. I wasn't even sure if they knew of each other's fee- interest in me." The main reason, if Hermione had to be true. She couldn't instigate a fight between brothers.
"And by interest you mean being head over heels in love with you?" George snorted amused and Hermione felt a hot rush on her face.
"Granger, you have no idea." Tired George sank down beside her again. "I don't have secrets from Fred, at least not real ones, and I never lie to him. I hide sweets and my best whiskey from him and sometimes I tell him some exaggerated lie for a laugh, but never something important."
"I know," Hermione sighed. "Tell him if you must. It's probably not longer important anyway. It's been years since everything and fighting about it now would be really foolish." George shot her a look like he wanted to say something, but at that moment her mobile gave a small beep and Hermione saw a text from Blaise.
Young lady, I hope you're out to get fresh air and didn't actually leave me behind here like the freaking out Weasley is saying. Is everything okay?
George snickered when she showed him the text.
"There is a heart behind his snobby, noble facade, isn't it?"
"Yeah, Blaise actually is a mother hen." Hermione grinned and quickly send her reply. It took Blaise under two minutes to arrive in the corner where George and Hermione were huddled together, bickering if tonight was a good time to tell Ron off. And maybe sock him one, as George suggested.
"Well, well, well," Blaise rolled his eyes, casually leaning against the wall. "While I had to witness the worst case of unnecessary freak-out ever, you're here cuddling with a ginger. Care to explain, Granger?" He grinned a Cheshire smile.
"The fair lady had a not so pleasant conversation with my brother. Apparently he wanted to confess his love to her-"
"-AGAIN?" Blaise grimaced.
"He knows?" George inquired.
"Yes, he does and now he will accompany me home where I will fall into my bed and try to forget this day. Maybe one of you can hit me on the head and help things along?" Hermione asked in a sarcastic tone.
"Not before you tell me all dirty little details about this." Blaise grinned and offered her his hand to stand up.
"Warn me before you let the cat out of the sack. And don't be too hard on Ron." Hermione whispered while she hugged George goodbye and then left as fast as possible with Blaise. They caught a cab and arrived at Blaise's flat soon.
"So, you're going to talk now or what?" Blaise asked with a twinkle, handed her a black tea and they made themselves comfortable on the sofa.
"There not much to tell. Ron tried to confess again and I - stupid as I am - blurted out that he already did that. And then I ran away. Caught George and Angeline snogging." She sank down deeper into the sofa.
"Ah, so then Fred is the twin you were eyeing the whole evening. You would never go for a taken man." Blaise grinned and Hermione could have smacked herself. "Thank you for that. I thought it would take more to get that information out of you."
"Breath a word about that to anyone and you will be a dead man." Hermione hissed.
"So, there is something to tell?" Blaise smirked. He obviously had a lot of fun. "Is that the thing you're not telling me?"
"No," she added hasty, "I just don't need you spreading rumours. The whole situation is awkward enough. You can't imagine how stressful all of this is." With a sigh Hermione laid herself completely on the sofa, her feet in Blaise lap.
"Well, I could help you to relax." With a suggestive wiggle of his eyebrows Blaise leaned down to her. Hermione had to admit to herself, that his offer was quite tempting. Blaise really did know what to do and it wouldn't be the first time.
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Ron was running circles in the flat. After his little freak-out about his memories and Hermione's departure, Harry and Ginny had declared the party was over. Reluctantly the guests had gone home, but a few stayed to help with the cleaning.
While Ron paced he could see how Fred, Harry, Ginny, Lee, Angelina and Susan cleaned the empty glasses and cups, collected bottles and adjusted furniture back to their rightful places. He tried to help them a few times, but apparently he was in the way and Ginny finally shooed him into his room.
Ron collapsed on his bed and closed his eyes. Now that the memories were back, he felt the guilt and the shame like it was a fresh wound. But he couldn't help but to be also angry at Hermione. He had been a git, but she had been too. They both were at fault for letting the fight escalate, for not apologising and ignoring each other. And maybe that was the reason they both hadn't told anyone in the last years. Ron remembered what Hermione had told him at their first meeting a few days ago.
"So, we didn't speak for three years because we were idiots?"
"Well, you were still together with that bimbo. I would have rather jumped off the Eiffel tower than to apologise."
"But you hung up this morning. I thought for sure you would be angry."
"It wa- I wasn't angry.. but rather scared. Frankly, I still am."
"Of what?"
"Of you getting your memories back. We both said some awful things."
Good god, she had been as scared as he was to contact him and apologise. They both had been frightened of being rejected by their best friend. Of not being forgiven. They really had been stubborn gits, both of them.
For what felt like an eternity Ron just laid on his bed with closed eyes and let his mind wander. His whole reason he had hold on for Romilda so long, has been that he wanted to prove to himself and everyone else that he had made the right choice with deciding for her and not Hermione. That Romilda was worth it. The first cheating he had forgiven for the same reason. God, he had been so stubborn. And dumb. And childish.
Lost in thought Ron startled when the door creaked open and Susan tiptoed in. He felt how she covered him with a blanket and he opened his eyes. Surprised Susan took a step back.
"I thought you were asleep?"
"Nah, can't get my mind to shut off."
"So, what's going on in there." Susan knocked on his forehead and sat down on the edge of his bed with unwavering confidence.
"Hermione," Ron sighed, but Susan only rolled her eyes.
"Yeah, I heard that when you had your dramatic five minutes earlier. Want to specify that?"
"Urg, it's- Hermione ran away after I tried to tell her something but apparently I already told her four years ago and it didn't go well then. It's just really complicated."
"You tried to confess again, didn't you?" Susan raised an eyebrow that clearly said what kind of idiot are you?
"You knew about it? I thought no one knew?"
"You told me one evening after work when we got drunk, a few weeks after your breakup from Romilda, I think. I think it weighted on your conciseness and you wanted to get it off. But that's thousand years old history, why are you pondering over that?" Susan asked in a light, joking tone.
"I'm just... tired of discovering how messed up my life is and what an idiot I've been."
"Well," Susan carefully choose her words, "like I said last time you were challenging your whole life. Don't be too hard on yourself. You can still try to be a different person."
"Yeah, sounds good. It's just- forget it." Ron blushed and groaned at his own stupid thoughts.
"No, tell me." Susan smiled and for a change she wasn't teasing him but seemed genuinely concerned for him.
"It's just... Swear you will never tell anyone." She nodded.
"I just have the feeling that it's my fate to be miserably in love with Hermione for my whole life. Always unrequired and damned to be either her best friend or not in her life at all. And I don't know if I can do that. And I don't know if I can ever love someone like I love her. I hate that, I don't want that."
"But you already were in love with someone else. Maybe your feelings will change when you remember it."
"And what if not? When I remember this mysterious girl and I feel nothing for her? I was together with Romilda, thought I loved her, but in reality I was still pinning after Hermione. What if it was the same with the mysterious girl?" Susan bit on her lower lip nervously and shrugged her shoulders.
"Maybe it's better to never remember this girl." Susan shook her head and stood up.
"Sleep and think about it when you're not longer so emotional." She bid him goodbye and left Ron once again alone with his racing mind and aching heart.
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Ron woke up the next day with a decision. Quickly he dialled Hermione's number and hoped she would pick up.
"Ron?" Hermione's voice sounded tired and fortunately not angry.
"Hermione, I would like to apologise for yesterday and-"
"I don't think we should do that over the phone." She interrupted him quietly, sounding like Ron felt.
"I think so too. That's why I'm calling." He took a deep breath. "Mione, we need to talk but firstly I need some time to think about everything, clear my mind and sort my memories. If it's okay, I would like you to wait till I'm ready."
"I'm more than okay with that, Ron. I will wait." Hermione said relieved and Ron felt like a thousand pounds were pushed off his heart and lungs.
"Thank you. So.. bye." He concluded awkwardly.
"Bye." With a beep the call was ended and Ron jumped up. He was eager to side-track himself and after a shower and a quick breakfast he walked down to the shop. Sunday was the only day when the shop was only opened from 10 to 12 o'clock and the twins offered brunch. The afternoon and the evening were closed, as well as the whole Monday, to give the twins and their employees free time.
"Morning," Ron greeted George, who was behind the bar. His older brother was grumbling a reply while he made a bunch of perfect coffees and handed them to Verity.
"Where is Susan? I thought she was going to take the shift for you?" Ron asked while he started to clean the counter. He wasn't scheduled to work today but he guesses help was always welcome. The shop was full and George appeared like a walking zombie.
"She was here but looked terrible. Has caught something, I sent her home."
The morning went by pretty fast as George and Ron were busy with preparing orders behind the bar and Verity almost ran to deliver everything. After they finally closed off, finished cleaning and waved Verity off, Ron sank down on one of the plush armchairs. George instead opted to lean against the counter with crossed arm. He eyed Ron like he was measuring him carefully and goose bumps ran down Ron's spine.
"Ron, I need your advice with something." George started, frightening calm. "See, I am in a tricky situation. I know something that I absolutely want to tell to the person whom it concerns, but if I do that it will probably cause a big fight. And I love both persons involved, I don't want to choose a side. So, what should I do? What would you do, Ron, when one of your brothers betrays another? When you stand between your older brother, your twin, and your younger brother and can't decide how to proceed?" George's eyes were dark and sad at the same time. Ron gulped. He had seen George in all kind of emotional turmoil. Overjoyed, happy and mischievous was his usual state. Concentrated and ambitious was also a common occurrence. Angry and sometime even aggressive during a soccer game or when a teacher had been unfair. Sad, grieving and distraught when Fred had been in the hospital. But disappointed was an expression that Ron had never seen on his older brother's face and the sight alone made his throat clench.
"I ran into Hermione yesterday before she went home. She was quite shaken up from your conversation and told me what happened." George's voice was icy. "Ron, I really don't care about your fight with Hermione. I'm not pleased with your behaviour but she was adamant that it wasn't my business and that you two would settle this down on your own. But what really make me boil is that you lied to Fred. You two had that damned agreement and you lied! You took Fred's chance."
"George," Ron swallowed hard. He hadn't thought about it himself yet, but it was obvious. His jealousy had made him lie to Fred, that was the real reason why he had never told anyone about his confession. He hadn't been mature enough to offer his brother the small possibility.
"Look, I don't care for your reasons or apologies, I just want one thing. Tell Fred. Tell him or I will do it. You have three days to sort yourself out or talk to Hermione or whatever. But after that I will tell Fred." Stonehard determination was engraved in George's eyes and Ron only nodded. He wasn't able to find words. But then George surprised Ron by walking and patted him on the shoulder.
"Okay, now let's go and get something to eat so that we can wake up the lazy lot upstairs." George smiled.
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Hermione hung up the call from Ron and needed a moment to orientate herself. She was still half asleep and sprawled out on the sofa, Blaise laying awkwardly beside and on top of her, tight asleep.
"Blaise," she shook the tall man, "wake up. We fell asleep." Grunting Blaise blinked and then pulled Hermione closer. He was quite the cuddler, when he was either drunk or sleepy.
"God, wake up you giant, you're heavy." Hermione pushed him hard and with a groan Blaise rolled to the side, right over the edge of the sofa and fell to the floor.
"Is that what I get for cheering up your distressed arse, Granger?" Blaise huffed from the floor. "I can't wait for you to move out."
"Please, you're the one hiding my stuff so that I will have to come back all the time. Don't think I haven't noticed, Zabini." Hermione deadpanned. She let her eyes wander through the room, which showed the remainders of the last night.
There were opened snack boxes, popcorn, chips and sweets everywhere, beer bottles and two wine glasses occupied the table and used tissues were scattered everywhere. The TV had shut itself off during the night but the cases of all Bridget Jones-DVD's still lay on the table. It was the perfect image of a leisure Hermione's-and-Blaise's-guilty-pleasure-night. Blaise had a guilty pleasure for romcoms, the more cliché the better. And Hermione, as the daughter of two dentists, had a guilty pleasure for unhealthy food. In combination with alcohol it was the perfect remedy against stress.
"Good, I need to go to the gym immediately." Blaise groaned as he also eyed the room.
"Of course, god beware if your perfect eight pack would be ruined." Hermione snorted. "Breakfast at the Leaky before you go and torture yourself?"
"Sounds like a plan."
It's a bit hard to motivate myself right now. So, I try to push through it and in order to set myself a goal I entered a challenge for a new story. I have to submit the first chapter till end of August, which hopefully leaves me enough time to finish this one.
As always, please review. It's heavily appreciate.
Inspiration for this chapter was In Between by Linkin Park. I just love this song.
Let me apologize to begin with
Let me apologize for what I'm about to say
But trying to be someone else was harder than it seemed
And somehow I got caught up in between
Between my pride and my promise
Between my lies and how the truth gets in the way
The things I want to say to you get lost before they come
The only thing that's worse than one is none
