Disclaimer: I do not own iCarly… not even a little.
I was up at six in the morning from Em's crying and just couldn't go back to sleep. Today was my show! I was so excited. Freddie and Crazy and Em were coming. I was also nervous Carly (and of course Spencer) was coming. What if she recognized me?
But I didn't want to focus on that. Freddie was wearing a brown suit. He knew I loved brown suits. Black was just too traditional, brown was new, different. His tie was light blue.
He bought Emmalynn a new dress. It was brown with light blue plaid pattern and a light blue sash. She had a brown hat with a light blue bow and white tights and mary-janes to go with it.
Crazy bought a dress. It was light blue with a brown sash at the bust. If you can't tell from this and our last outing, we like to match. Well, Freddie does… everyone else just goes along with it.
Right now, I was sitting in Emmalynn's room, rocking her. Her eyes were heavy. I could tell she was tired.
"Baby, you are going to my show tonight. You are the prettiest baby in the whole wide world. Are you excited to go to Mama's show? Mama's excited to have you there.
"But Mama's scared too. Your Aunt Carly, you remember the brown haired girl from me and daddy's show? Anyway, Aunt Carly is gonna be there, but she doesn't know about your daddy and me. She doesn't know about my dancing, you, daddy's work, or about me and daddy being in love.
"When she finds out, she will be mad at us. She might cry. What it she never talked to us again? We should have told her.
"Daddy says it will be okay, that we can get through it. I believe him. We can get through anything. Me, you, and Daddy. And even Craz- Nana.
"Remember, that you aren't gonna be one of those little babys of teenage parents who grow up living a shitty life. Your life is gonna be amazing. Okay? You know why? Because me and Daddy love each other, and nothing is ever gonna change that," I said with a smile.
"You've got that right," I gasped and looked up to see Freddie in the door way.
"You scared the shit out of me, idiot!" I said. He just chuckled and walked over to kiss me. I handed him Em, who was sound asleep, and he put her in the crib. He walked back over, helped me up, sat down, and pulled me back on his lap.
"I love you," he said into my ear.
"How much did you hear?" I asked. He smiled.
"All of it," he said, I groaned, "But Sam, you have got that right. It's gonna be okay, Carly will eventually understand."
"I guess," I mumbled.
"Can't sleep?" He asked. I nodded.
"I'm nervous, but excited," I replied.
"I know," he laughed.
"Why did you come in here?" I asked.
"I rolled over and you weren't there. I figured you would be in here," he said with a smirk, "And I was right."
"You ass," I chuckled.
"Go to sleep," he mumbled. I fell asleep with my head on Freddie's shoulder sitting on a rocking chair.
I woke up to a flash. Crazy was standing there with a camera.
"What the…" I trailed off standing up.
"I came in to walk you and it was so cute, I had to get my camera," She smiled. I scoffed.
"You are really crazy," I said. The rest of the morning went normal. Freddie made me bacon. I got in the shower, got dressed and grabbed my dance bag.
Freddie handed me my lunch. Creamy Peanut butter, Strawberry jelly sandwich, not crust. Just the way I like it. Freddie makes fun of me for not eating the crust, well he did, but then I punched him in the face.
I walked to Vanna's. Man, I was nervous. What if I mess up or some chizz like that? I mean, I was always the lead so my fear seems ridicules because I always did amazing.
What if Carly finds out? She is gonna be so mad, super duper mad. It would have been easier if I just told her. Of course, dance, dating, baby, and Pear are all related. If you find out one, you find out them all.
Freddie and I wanted to tell Carly about us, but we weren't sure it was going to work out and didn't know what her reaction would be. Of course, it worked. We were just too afraid to tell her we've been hiding it for that long. When I got pregnant, that was just an 'Oh crap we sure as hell can't tell her now'.
You see, Carly was totally against teen pregnancy. I mean, she would have understood, but she would have been disappointed and mad at us for not telling her we were dating, much less having sex.
Em was a surprise baby, I was switching between pills, Freddie's condom broke. We still love her, but she was a surprise. Could have happened to anyone.
Carly would have still have been upset with us for letting it happen. She is, of course, little miss Perfect and thinks it wouldn't be fair and such to the child. I think Em has an awesome life, thank you very much.
Carly is a bit hypocritical. I mean, she had sex at 15 with Griffen. Well yes, Freddie and I did have it sooner than her but we still took precautions and Carly's not a perfect little virgin either. I knew she would be disappointed about Em. Makes me mad. Of course, I still love Carly like a sister, but she isn't perfect.
Ah, who am I to judge? I'm far from perfect. A teen mom, a liar, a bully, everything people thought was imperfect, I was. Oh well, life is too short to dwell on unimportant things.
Freddie thinks I'm perfect. Crazy likes me. Carly sees the good in me (even if not for long). Emmalynn needs me. Spencer thinks I'm a cool person. Guppy thinks I'm fun to be around. And Gibby, even thought I hurt him, still thinks of me as a friend.
Freddie loves me.
I debated whether or not I should post this. It's so different from everything else in this story's humor. But I worked hard on this and I liked it. I hope Sam seems in character.
This is pretty much a chapter of Sam being worried about her show and thinking about her life. I like this chapter, it's not funny, but I still like it.
