As Emma waited she realized one of the questions she should have asked was how long it would take. She supposed it didn't matter because it would feel longer than it was in reality.
They had gotten to the hospital yesterday - just her and Regina - after having a talk with Henry about why he wasn't coming this time. They had arrived and the doctor ran some tests and the nurse asked a long list of questions, some of which Emma answered on behalf of Regina when the other woman seemed at a loss. They were questions Emma could easily answer honestly such as how Regina's appetite had been.
She wasn't sure Regina appreciated her honesty.
Then came time for the doctor, a kindly older man named Travis Morgan, to go over the results of the tests. Emma tried to concentrate on Regina to gauge her reaction but as soon as the doctor said there was no discernable change in the cancer, Emma forgot to watch Regina.
"Are you sure?" Emma blurted out. It seemed inconceivable that there wouldn't be a change. Regina had been torturing herself with these anti-rejection drugs that made her sick. It wasn't possible in Emma's mind that all of that was for nothing.
"I am sure," Dr. Morgan said. "But it isn't all that uncommon for there to be no change after one treatment. That is why they are done in a series."
"There is a higher success rate after the first treatment when the stem cell donor is related to the patient," Regina said as if she was reciting some study. And maybe she was, Emma didn't know. Again she thought how unfair it was that Regina had no family alive to be a donor for her.
Regina spent the night in the hospital that night since her procedure was the next morning. Emma had slept like shit in a hotel that Regina insisted on paying for since Emma was doing her the favor of coming with her.
And now all Emma could do was wait.
"How long have you and Regina been together?" One of the nurses asked, rousing Emma from her thoughts.
"What?"
"I asked how long you have been together."
"Regina and me? No. We aren't."
"Oh. Sorry I didn't mean to offend you. It's just I heard you say 'our son' earlier about Regina's son Henry and you were with him before after the first round I assumed."
"I wasn't offended," Emma said. "I have no issue with same-sex couples or anything. That isn't how she and I are. Henry is my birth son. He is Regina's adopted son."
"Oh," the nurse said as if that didn't clear it up at all in her mind. "I am glad she has someone with her regardless. When she came here the first time she said she didn't have anyone in her life to be here with her. I am sure it means a lot to her that you are here now."
"We are just ... um friends I guess. I'm just helping her out a bit."
...
When another nurse came to get her she was led to a room where Regina was asleep.
"She will sleep for a few hours,"
"Did it go ok?"
"Yes. It went fine. She should be in better shape after this one. The first one is always harder."
"Thanks," Emma said taking a seat next to the bed.
She watched Regina as she slept. She wondered, not for the first time, if Regina slept this well normally. She had only seen Regina asleep when she was sedated or drugged up that she slept like someone in a coma.
She laughed thinking about how the nurse thought she and Regina were a couple. There probably weren't two people less suited to each other than they were. If they were a couple they would spend their time fighting that was for sure. The only thing they seemed to agree on was Henry. They were both willing to do whatever it took for Henry.
She supposed some relationships had been built on less.
When Regina woke, she hoped Regina would tell her how she felt about how the treatment was going. Besides that one burst of emotion, Regina hadn't been forthcoming about how she felt about it all. She knew Regina wouldn't be able to hold it all in forever.
…
Regina watched the landscape go by as Emma drove them home. She had woken at the hospital to see Emma asleep in the chair beside her bed. She wondered once again why this woman was giving up so much of her time for her. She knew it was for Henry, but even this seemed a little above and beyond.
She tried to think of how many people in her life were the kind of people who would do something like this for her – it was a very small list.
She knew it was because of the life she had lived. She knew the things she had done were unforgivable.
Emma woke when the nurse came into check on her. She smiled at Regina and asked her how she was doing. Regina simply said "tired."
She slept off and on that day. Every time she woke, Emma tried to engage in her conversation, mostly about how she was feeling and how she felt about how she was feeling.
She had no idea what to say so she said very little.
Emma must have thought she was depressed or something because she tried to "cheer her up" by telling her how the nurse thought they were a couple. Emma laughed about it. She had not.
When she didn't laugh, Emma asked her if she had something against same-sex couples.
"No," Regina said. "Why would you ask that?"
"I don't know. I mean how are things like that viewed back in fairy tale land?"
"I don't know. I guess I never really gave it much thought. People like who they like, I don't know why this world seems to take an issue with it. I mean there are people in our land who would be against such things but that is nothing more than ignorance."
"That is probably the best thing I have heard about that land yet. I can't believe I am going to say this but there are times I am thankful I didn't grow up there."
"Yes, but you should have," Regina said looking away.
"Hey, we can't change the past, either of us, so let's just keep it there – in the past," Emma said touching her hand.
They had released her the next morning, and they were actually nearing Storybrooke when Emma's phone rang. Emma answered it, while still driving and Regina bit her tongue although her instinct was to lecture her about. From the conversation she knew it was Hook. Emma got off the phone quickly.
"It was Killian," Emma said as if she owed an explanation to Regina.
"Meeting up with him?" Regina said making an assumption from the part of the conversation she heard.
"Yes. I'll get you home and make sure you have everything you need first."
"I will probably just sleep when I get there, so you can just drop me off."
"What kind of caretaker would I be if I didn't make sure you got tucked in?"
Emma smiled when she saw Regina smile.
….
Emma sat in the booth at Granny's more staring at her coffee than actually drinking it. She was so lost in thought she didn't notice Ruby sit down across from her until she spoke.
"Tired from your trip to Boston?"
"No,"
"Then why have you been staring at the coffee long enough for it to grow cold?"
Emma shrugged.
"Come on, if you can't tell me who are you going to tell, your new BFF Regina?"
"She's not my best friend."
"I know. That title belongs to me," Ruby smiled. "And as your best friend I demand you tell me why you are all depressy looking."
Emma paused before saying anything. "I was with Killian last night. He asked me not to take Regina to Boston when it's time for her next treatment."
"Oh."
"That's all you have to say about it?"
"I am not surprised actually. What did you tell him?"
"I told him I had to. He was … I don't know being really difficult about the whole thing. He said I was spending too much time over there. I told him it was my time to spend and he had the nerve to say what about his time. I didn't even know what to say. I was like she has cancer, and he just said maybe we should talk about it later. Did you know he hasn't once asked me how she is doing?"
"I am not surprised."
"Why do you keep saying that?"
"Look, the other night, the day you left to take Regina to Boston, I went out to the Rabbit Hole. Killian was there along with some of his cohorts. They were drinking pretty heavily. Are you sure you want to hear this?"
"Tell me."
"One of his guys asked where you were and he said you were in Boston with Regina. Someone said something about Regina being sick and someone else made a comment about her deserving it. And Killian tells them all to be quiet and then he stands up, raises his glass and says, 'may we all be drinking at her funeral soon.' And then they all toasted to it."
Emma stood up and stormed out without saying a word despite Ruby calling after her.
