I wasn't supposed to post this until Tuesday, but I got it done really early and everyone was so good about reviewing the last chapter that I decided to post it now. See—those reviews are for the benefit of everyone ;).

love-for-eva: I take it you enjoyed the scene. It was fun getting her to write it and I have several texts that will forever be saved in my phone from our conversations during the whole ordeal.

mixtapesandcellmates: It's one of the things that annoys me most about the show. I actually don't hate Finn even though you might think it from my story, but I hate what the writers did to him and how they don't make him own up to anything.

Whispering Molly: Your reviews always leave a smile on my face so I just wanted to thank you. Also, I really loved your BlackThroated Green Warbler story and was surprised when I saw you commenting on mine.

And thank you to everyone else. I read and love every single one of your reviews and I wish I could comment on all of them, but commenting to 30+ people would be too much. Hell, this was probably too much and you're wishing I would shut up right now, so I will.

Enjoy…


Chapter 11 – The Way You Watch Me

Rachel walked into the choir room and waved to Quinn before sitting down between Puck and Kurt. She was sitting directly in front of the blonde, who was flanked by Santana and Mercedes. The first bell hadn't rung yet and the girls didn't get the chance to meet at the bleachers as planned since Finn had called an emergency Glee club meeting; no one really wanted to be there, but none of them wanted a lecture from Mr. Schue on commitment and teamwork.

"So, how was everyone's break," Rachel cheerfully asked after sitting down. She looked around to everyone in the room and noticed that everyone was decidedly less cheerful looking than her.

Puck grunted. "Too short."

"Tense," Kurt replied. "But I already told you all about it last night."

Rachel nodded; she had heard Kurt's entire story when he called her Sunday night. Finn had been pouting all break; Kurt finally snapped at the dinner table and told him to get over himself. He was then grounded for the rest of the weekend even though he didn't think it was very fair. While she did not approve of the timing of Kurt's outburst, she did agree that his parents were being unfair in punishing him.

"I went over to Britt's family since mine doesn't really do the whole Thanksgiving thing," Santana said, shrugging.

"My mom tried to fix duck instead of turkey, so I set him free," Brittany answered.

Rachel looked to Santana, but the other girl shrugged and Rory added, "But dinner was still wonderful; it was my first Thanksgiving."

"My family drove to Columbus to have dinner at my Mamaw's," Mercedes said, smiling. "Did you end up going to Illinois?" Mercedes nudged her shoulder into Quinn's.

"No," Quinn replied, briefly shaking her head.

"Why didn't you call?" Mercedes asked. "I told you there was more than enough room for you to come with us. My parents wouldn't have had any problem with you spending Thanksgiving with us."

"I spent the weekend with Rachel," Quinn said, receiving a few shocked looks—mostly from Mercedes and Finn.

It was common knowledge that Rachel and Quinn had some unexpected friendship going on, but it still seemed to surprise people to hear that Quinn had willingly spent time with the brunette. Rachel didn't know it was so shocking, though, and was always slightly insulted and hurt by their behavior.

"All weekend?" Mercedes asked, appearing to get over the shock of Quinn's news.

Quinn nodded. "She invited me to dinner and being Rachel, wouldn't take no for an answer." Quinn gave Rachel a smile as if letting her know she wasn't insulting her. "I stayed the night since it was late and then they asked if I wanted to go with them for the weekend, so I went." Quinn shrugged and then smiled to herself. "It was fun; Rachel's family is really nice and it was actually the best time I've ever had during a holiday."

"Seriously?" Puck asked, receiving a slap on the leg from Rachel. "I mean—that's cool."

Rachel rolled her eyes when Puck grinned at her. "Quinn and I had a wonderful time together; I don't know why all of you sound so surprised by that information. You know we're friends now."

"Yeah, but there's being friends and then there's being friends that take holiday road trips together," Mercedes said. "It's cool, though." She looked at Quinn and scratched her head. "Just surprising."

"Don't listen to them," Blaine said, leaning forward to look around Kurt. "We're all happy you and Quinn have finally put aside your differences."

Mike and Tina nodded in agreement and Artie added, "You two fighting was getting old."

Rachel turned to see Finn scowling at Quinn from his seat at the edge of the room; he was slouched in his seat with his arms folded across his chest, not looking happy. Rachel decided to ignore it and turned around in time to see Mr. Schue walk into the room. He looked around, Rachel assumed to make sure everyone was in the room, and then stepped in front of the class.

"Alright guys, Tuesday after school Finn came up to me and asked if we could have this meeting before school," Mr. Schue began. "He had a great idea for this week's assignment, so I'll let him step up here and explain it to you guys."

Will took a seat and Finn walked over to the board, grabbed a black marker, and wrote 'lady music week' on the small whiteboard.

"Not again," Puck said, shaking his head.

"Why is he doing this?" Rachel whispered to him.

"I don't know," Puck replied. "She knows we're all behind her—that's obvious." He looked at everyone sitting around Santana and then at Finn's seat, which was separate from everyone else. "Wasn't last time about him wanting her to know we're all with her and not wanting her to hurt herself or some crap?"

"Well, at least this time you're not going to see a song to my mother," Rachel whispered harshly.

"Can we pretend that never happened," Puck asked, shrinking slightly under Rachel's glare.

"I was wrong when I said what I said in the hall," Finn said, standing in front of everyone. "I was just mad that you were insulting me and I stepped over the line. I can't take back what I did, but I can try and make up for it. I've been seeing a lot about how gay kids are killing themselves and I wanted you to know that every single one of us are behind you, including me."

Santana scoffed. "Are you crazy? I'm not going to hurt myself, Bibendum."

Rachel frowned and tilted her head for a moment and then turned back to look at Santana. "Bibendum?"

"It's the Michelin Man," Santana whispered, rolling her eyes.

"How do you know that?" Rachel asked. "Do you just look up names to insult people with?"

"She does," Brittany confirmed. "She actually keeps them in this little notebook and—"

"Britt!" Santana said, clamping her hand over the blonde's mouth. "Remember how we talked about keeping certain things private."

"That was one of them?" Brittany mumbled behind Santana's hand.

Santana nodded, released Brittany, and then turned back to Finn. "Listen, this is not necessary. It's been a month; I'm fine and will kick anyone's ass that tries to say anything to me."

"Still, I think it would be good for us to sing music that was created by ladies and for ladies," Finn said. "This is my apology to you and my way of honoring you this week."

"Well, I think it's a wonderful idea," Mr. Schue said, standing up, and clapping Finn on the back.

Finn beamed at Rachel as he said, "Thanks, Mr. Schue."

"And now we see why he's really doing this," Puck whispered.

"What? Why?" Rachel asked.

"He wants you back," Puck replied.

Rachel scoffed. "That is not happening."

"Maybe not, but he isn't doing this as an apology to Santana; he's doing it as a way for you to forgive him."

Rachel looked at Finn and could see what Puck meant; Finn kept looking at her and giving her what he probably thought were charming smiles. She sighed and looked back at Santana, but she was talking to Brittany and completely ignoring what was going on at the front of the room. Rachel caught sight of Quinn, though, who was scowling at Finn.

"Are you okay?" Rachel asked.

"Peachy," Quinn replied.

"I would like everyone to spend the rest of the day thinking of songs they would like to sing for this week's assignment," Will said, bringing everyone's attention back to him. "Finn has already prepared something for today's meeting, so we have that to look forward to after school."

The bell rang and everyone stood up to gather their things, preparing to head for their first period classes. Rachel sighed as she grabbed her bag, noticing that Finn was heading in her direction. Before he could get to her, though, Quinn had stepped in between Rachel and Finn, effectively stopping his pursuit.

"Can I walk you to class?" Quinn asked, much to Rachel's surprise and Finn's obvious annoyance if the look on his face was anything to go by.

"Sure," Rachel said, giving her a thankful smile.

Finn huffed as they walked by and Rachel noticed, out of the corner of her eye, that Quinn was smirking.

"You had that look of 'oh no, Finn is coming to talk to me' so I thought I would save you," Quinn finally explained when they were far enough away from the choir room for Finn to not overhear them.

Rachel smiled. "Noah thinks he's doing this because he's trying to win me over; he thinks that's what this assignment is really all about."

"And what do you think?" Quinn asked.

"I'm not positive, but I hope Noah is wrong," Rachel replied. "I have made my feelings perfectly clear to Finn and he should know that there is no possibility of us rekindling any type of romance. I told him we could be friends, but I don't even see a possibility of that anymore; not after the way he's been behaving."

"So, there's no chance you're going to get back together with him?" Quinn asked.

"What makes you think there would be?" Rachel asked, turning to look at the blonde.

Quinn shrugged. "Given your guys' track record—well, it wouldn't be the first time you broke up and started dating again."

"I know, but just trust me when I say it is not going to happen this time," Rachel replied. "We've had our time and it's never going to happen again."

"Is there any specific reason why this time is different than the last?" Quinn gently asked.

"There are many reasons," Rachel said, shrugging. "Mostly, I realized he isn't the one for me. A long time ago, I thought he was, but I know better now. I want someone who's going to support me and my dreams. I want someone who isn't going to hold me back and I know he's not that person." Rachel sighed. "Thank you for walking me to class, Quinn."

"Yeah, you might want to get into your class before you're late," Quinn quietly said, smiling. "I'll see you at lunch, Rach."

Rachel watched as Quinn walked down the hall; when the blonde got to the end, she briefly turned around and locked eyes with her. Quinn gave her a shy smile and then rounded the corner. Rachel took a deep breath, smiled to herself, and walked into her class right before the bell sounded.


"Hey, guys," Finn said, bringing his lunch tray up to the table.

It was the first time he had sat with them in weeks. His plan for this week's assignment seemed to sway several people over to his side and no one really put up a fuss when he sat his tray down next to Rachel. Santana still seemed annoyed by his presence and Quinn had her eyes narrowed at him, though. Puck and Rachel locked eyes from opposite ends of the table and Puck just shrugged at her.

When he sat beside Rachel, she noticed Quinn stiffen. Rachel eyed her curiously and tilted her head as she watched the girl across from her; she couldn't figure out why the blonde hated Finn so much. She had always seemed to tolerate him, but now she seemed to actively hate him and make it known and Rachel couldn't figure out what was different between the first time around and now. She wanted to ask her, but it would probably be one of those things that Quinn didn't want to talk about so she hadn't even bothered asking her yet.

"How are you?" Finn asked, turning his head toward Rachel.

"I'm fine, Finn," Rachel said with a nod.

"Great," Finn said, smiling at her; she was looking at Finn but could see Quinn rolling her eyes.

"So, do you plan on singing something this week?" Finn asked as he shook his milk carton.

"I haven't really decided yet," Rachel said, shrugging.

"I think it would be nice if you did," Finn replied. "You know, since you and Santana are friends now. It will be nice for her to know that you support her and everything."

"Santana knows I support her," Rachel tersely said. "She doesn't need me to sing a song to tell her that, but I will still think about it and let you know what I decide."

"Cool," Finn said, looking pleased with himself.

"What, not going to ask how the rest of us are doing or ask us if we're going to sing a song to Santana?" Quinn asked.

Finn looked at Quinn and seemed to narrow his eyes slightly before tensely asking, "How are you?"

"I'm wonderful," Quinn gritted out. "Although, I would be better if you weren't so obviously doing this whole thing to get back in everyone's good graces and get back with Rachel."

"I don't know what you're talking about," Finn replied.

"Don't play stupid," Quinn said, dropping her fork onto her tray. "You know exactly what you're doing and it's obvious, so quit pretending this is about apologizing to Santana. Once again, it's all about you and what you want."

"You're paranoid, Quinn," Finn said, shaking his head. "The only thing this is about is making up for what I did. I'm trying to show how sorry I am and I really wish you would give me a second chance."

Quinn rolled her eyes and stood up, walking off, and leaving her tray behind. Santana stood up to go after her, but Rachel put her hand on the other's girl's arm.

"I'll go after her," Rachel murmured.

"Why are you running after her?" Finn asked as soon as he saw Rachel standing up.

"Because we're friends, Finn," Rachel said as she walked away.

By the time Rachel got into the hall, she couldn't see Quinn anywhere. Since she couldn't possibly have enough time to get very far, Rachel checked the nearest bathroom, which was only several yards away.

"Quinn, are you in here?" Rachel asked, noticing that one of the stall doors was closed.

"Yeah," Quinn replied.

Rachel leaned against the wall. "Are you okay?"

The door to the middle stall opened and Quinn came out, sighing. "Yeah."

"Why did you storm off like that?" Rachel asked, taking several steps toward the blonde.

"Finn just—he makes me so angry sometimes," Quinn replied. "He pretends like he doesn't know what he's doing and then expects everyone to forgive him for everything because of it. He did it with you a million times; he would be the world's worst boyfriend and then expect you to forgive him because he didn't really know what he was doing and it's bullshit."

"Quinn!" Rachel said, having never really heard the girl swear that much before.

Quinn rolled her eyes. "It's not like you've never heard the word before."

"Not out of your mouth," Rachel said, smiling.

"I just think he manipulates people and I'm tired of it," Quinn said, shrugging.

"So—is that why you glare at him so much?" Rachel asked.

Quinn sighed and looked down. "Partly."

"And the other part?" Rachel asked.

"Other things," Quinn said, looking at Rachel with an almost questioning look.

Rachel laughed. "Must you always be so vague?"

"Maybe," Quinn said before her face broke out into a smirk.

"So I take it you won't be singing a song for this week's special assignment," Rachel said, turning her back to the mirrors so she could lean again the sink.

"Actually, I plan on singing a song tomorrow," Quinn replied.

"Oh?" Rachel said, raising her eyebrows. "What song do you plan on singing?"

"You'll just have to be patient," Quinn said, shaking her head.

Rachel huffed; being patient was never one of her most known qualities. "Am I ever going to be able to get anything out of you?"

"Maybe you just need to find the right way to do it," Quinn said, smirking at her.

Rachel opened her mouth to speak, but then cocked her head and frowned at Quinn's statement.

"Anyway, since I don't really feel like going back to the cafeteria and it might be weird staying in the bathroom for the rest of the lunch period, would you want to go to the choir room?" Quinn asked. "Unless you want to get back."

Rachel shook her head. "The choir room is fine."

"Great," Quinn said, pausing to allow Rachel to get in front of her.

"Any chance I will get a sneak peak of tomorrow's performance?" Rachel asked, looking back as they walked out of the bathroom.

Quinn laughed. "Be patient, Rachel."

"Fine," Rachel said, sighing. "But it was worth a try."


"Hey, Berry," Santana said, walking into the choir room.

"Hello, Santana," Rachel said. "You're early."

Santana shrugged. "I wanted to ask you something, actually. Since you're Quinn's bestest new friend, I was wondering if you knew what hell is up with her lately? Every day I think she's going to rip Finnept's head off and take it to the zoo to feed to a bear or something."

"Honestly, Santana, I have no idea," Rachel said, shaking her head. "His mere presence just seems to annoy her lately."

"You haven't asked her about it?" Santana asked, raising an eyebrow at her.

"Of course I asked, but she wouldn't say what was wrong," Rachel replied. "If you haven't noticed, she isn't exactly the most open person. Usually when I inquire about personal matters, she either tells me she doesn't want to talk about it, is very vague with her answer, or just flat out ignores that I asked anything to begin with."

"It's weird," Santana frowning. "I haven't seen her like this since—well, since you."

"What do you mean?" Rachel asked.

"When you were trying to steal Finn away from her sophomore year," Santana clarified. "She glared at you a lot. It makes me think of that, which is weird."

"Are you saying she's jealous?" Rachel asked.

Santana shrugged. "Just making an observation."

"You could ask her," Rachel suggested.

Santana scoffed. "And have the bitch bite my head off? No thanks; I'll leave that one to you."

Rachel rolled her eyes and watched as the rest of the Glee members filed in, one by one. Quinn was the last to arrive and Mr. Schue closed the door behind her.

"Alright, who has something prepared for us today?" he asked as soon as he got to the front of the group.

"I do, Mr. Schue," Quinn said, standing up.

"Well, that's wonderful," he said, stepping aside to give the floor to Quinn.

Quinn walked over to the piano, but stopped next to the bench and faced the group. "I wanted to do this to show you how proud I am that you finally started being honest with everyone—even if it wasn't quite your choice." Quinn gave an annoyed look in Finn's direction before moving her eyes back to Santana. "We listened to this a lot while we were freshman and I thought I would sing it to you today. And someone told me not too long ago that I need to play the piano more, so here I go." She let out a small laugh and gave Rachel a quick smile before sitting down.

"All of these lines across my face
Tell you the story of who I am
So many stories of where I've been
And how I got to where I am
But these stories don't mean anything
When you've got no one to tell them to
It's true, I was made for you"

Rachel didn't know the song, but she looked at Santana, who had a huge grin on her face, and Brittany, who was beside her looking equally as happy. Clearly it was a song that meant something to the three of them.

"I climbed across the mountain tops
Swam all across the ocean blue
I crossed all the lines and I broke all the rules
And baby I broke them all for you
Oh because even when I was flat broke
You made me feel like a million bucks
You do and I was made for you"

Rachel was in awe as Quinn's fingers glided effortlessly across the keys and she suddenly couldn't seem to take her eyes off the blonde. As she continued watching her, she unexpectedly found tears threatening to come. She didn't know what it was, but Quinn had her entranced. Maybe it was because Quinn seemed so free when she was a singing and playing, but whatever it was, it was mesmerizing.

Quinn took her eyes off the piano and turned her head, giving Santana a lopsided smile. Rachel quickly glanced at Santana, who had a similar smile; when she looked back, though, she locked eyes with the blonde. Quinn's hazel eyes seemed to bore into her and the two held their gaze as Quinn started singing again.

"You see the smile that's on my mouth
It's hiding the words that don't come out
And all of our friends who think that I'm blessed
They don't know my head is a mess
No, they don't know who I really am
And they don't know what I've been through like you do
And I was made for you"

Rachel was vaguely aware that someone had nudged her left side, but she still couldn't tear her eyes away from Quinn's.

"All of these lines across my face
Tell you the story of who I am
So many stories of where I've been
And how I got to where I am
Oh but these stories don't mean anything
When you've got no one to tell them to
It's true, I was made for you
Oh yeah and it's true, that I was made for you"

When she finished the last note, everyone started loudly clapping and Brittany jumped out of her seat, running up to Quinn, and pulling her into a hug. Santana wasn't far behind and Brittany pulled her girlfriend into a group hug.

"That was wonderful!" Mr. Schue said and everyone else murmured in agreement.

"That was pretty badass," Puck said, nodding toward her.

"You were amazing," Rachel said as soon as Quinn had made her way over to her.

"Thank you," Quinn said, blushing and giving her a shy smile.

Finn huffed and stood up. "I also have another song I would like to sing."

Rachel only half listened to what Finn was singing; she was too busy glancing over at Quinn to really pay attention. Every time she would look at Finn, she would think about what she had just seen Quinn do and it couldn't compare. Where Quinn's performance was beautiful and heartfelt, Finn's was just awkward. He kept looking at Rachel to see if she was paying attention and after the fourth time, she rolled her eyes. Toward the end of his performance, Rachel could feel two sets of eyes on her: Finn and Quinn's. She ignored the fact that Finn was staring at her again and looked to her right. Quinn appeared to be studying her, but quickly turned away as soon as Rachel looked at her.

When Finn finished, Rachel absentmindedly started clapping with the rest of the group, but her eyes never left Quinn. She did notice that everyone seemed far less exacted about his performance than Quinn's, though.

"How was I?" Finn asked.

"Fine," Rachel automatically replied.

Rachel finally looked away from Quinn when Mr. Schue started speaking; since no one else had prepared anything, he gave them a short lecture on participation and then dismissed them.

"She's amazing isn't she," Puck wistfully said as he watched Quinn walking across the room.

Rachel smiled. "She is."

"I just hope she realizes it one of these days," Puck said, shaking his head. "She's always been so hard on herself to be perfect and never realized that she is perfect." Puck sighed and looked at Rachel. "I hope when the right person comes along, they'll make her see what the rest of us see."

"You love her, don't you?" Rachel asked, but she didn't need him to confirm it; she already knew the answer.

"I do," Puck replied. "But I'm not the one that's going to make her see how special she is."

"How do you know?" Rachel asked. "You're here for a reason—maybe it's to get your happy ending."

Puck shook his head. "I wish that's why I was here, but I think I'm here to make sure she gets her happy ending."

"You don't know that, Noah," Rachel replied. "Maybe you're both here to get your happy ending together."

Puck smiled sadly. "Maybe—"

Puck shrugged his backpack higher on to his shoulder and walked out of the room, leaving Rachel alone. Rachel walked over to the piano and ran her hand along the smooth surface. Sighing, she sat down on the bench and furrowed her brows. She didn't know why, but she couldn't get Quinn's performance out of her head or the look in Quinn's eyes as she stared at her. Quinn had looked at her with such intensity that she had never seen from her before and it made Rachel wonder how long she had been looking at her like that. She wasn't going to dwell on it, though, since she was probably just imagining thing, so Rachel shook her head at the thought and finally left the room.


"First of all, congratulations to Kurt, your senior class president," Mr. Schue said, leaving the group in a round of applause. "And I would also like you to extend a congratulations to your father from all of us."

"I will let him know," Kurt said, nodding and smiling.

Rachel put her hand over Kurt's and gave it a squeeze as she smiled at the boy. "I knew you could do it."

"Thank you for everything," Kurt said, squeezing her hand back.

"As we all know, Sectionals is next weekend, so I want everyone coming up with ideas for our performances," Mr. Schue said. "We've got an amazing set list and I think we're going to crush the competition this year!" Mike and Brittany both cheered and Rachel couldn't help but smile. "Next week is going to be a lot of hard to work, so I want everyone to rest up this weekend and be prepared to work when we come back."

"Do you think we'll ever have our performance down more than a couple hours before the competition?" Kurt said, rolling his eyes.

"No," Rachel said, shaking her head; she never understood her teacher's insistence on waiting until the last minute. Practice made perfect, so it was hard to be perfect when they always waited until the last minute to learn their routine or sometimes even what their set list was going to be.

"Now, Santana has asked to say something to you all," Mr. Schue said, motioning to her.

Santana walked to the front of the room. "I just wanted to thank you all. I know I give you a lot of crap, but most of you mean a lot to me." She looked at Brittany and Quinn and then, much to Rachel's surprise, her. "While this whole week was completely unnecessary, it was still sort of nice. Although, if you ever tell anyone I said any of this, I will deny it and then kick your ass." Several people laughed and Santana smiled. "Yesterday I finally came out to my parents; they actually weren't all that surprised and were very supportive. I plan on telling my abuela tonight, so all the people that I care about most will know. Since you all have been singing songs to me this week, I figured I should sing one of my own."

As soon as Santana started singing, Rachel turned to Puck and whispered, "Do you think I should talk her out of it."

Puck shrugged. "It didn't exactly go well last time."

"She was crushed last time," Rachel stated. "To have one of the most important people in your life reject you—I don't want her to go through that again."

"So talk to her," Puck said.

"What do you think I should say?" Rachel asked.

"I don't know," Puck replied. "You're the one that's good with words and stuff. You've managed to get this far, this shouldn't be any different than what you've already done."

Rachel watched as Santana sang the rest of her song and clapped with the rest of the group. She smiled brightly when the other girl looked her way and Santana winked at her. She sat there the rest of the period trying to come up with the best tactic to talk to Santana. When Glee ended, Rachel walked up to her and asked, "Can we talk for a second."

"Wait for me, Britt," Santana gently said to her girlfriend.

Brittany gave Santana a kiss on the cheek and then reached out and squeezed Rachel's hand as she walked by. "See you tomorrow, Rach."

"What is it, Berry?" Santana asked, turning to her.

"It's about what you said earlier," Rachel said, smoothing her skirt out to sit down. "I think it's wonderful that you finally had the courage to tell your parents about you and Brittany, but how is your grandmother going to feel about it? From what you've told me, she's very traditional and I don't want you to be hurt if she doesn't react the way you would like."

Santana sighed and sat down beside her. "I know it's a very real possibility. She is a very proud and traditional woman and I just hope she loves me like I think she does. I know it's a risk, but she's one of the most important people in my life and I can't hide it from her anymore, even if it might mean losing her."

Rachel nodded; if this was important to Santana, she wasn't going to push any farther. "You can call me if you need to talk tonight."

"I know, Berry," Santana said. "Now, enough of this sentimental shit. Britts and I has got to get our mack on before my parents get home. They've set up rules now," Santana rolled her eyes, "as if that's going to stop us."

"Good luck tonight," Rachel said.

Santana waved without turning around and Rachel sighed as soon as she was out of the room. Santana was doing so well and Rachel hoped tonight didn't make her backtrack any. She didn't want to see her hurt again, but it wasn't her decision to make. She could only be there to help with the fallout.


The song Quinn sang was The Story by Brandi Carlile.

Please take a second to leave a review; I always love reading your comments and they keep me happy and motivated. Plus, they're the only way I know how I'm doing since I don't think my best friend will tell me if I start to suck.