My holidays are here. So just trying to update whenever I am free.

Disclaimer: I do not own CCS

( ) author's note

' ' thoughts

" " speaking

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Last chapter:

Walking slowly back to my room, I went to prepare myself for the night. I chose a plain white kimono and left my hair untied with only a flower pin in my hair. Crying had not done much damage to my face and I quickly applied a light coloured lipstick. Checking my reflection in the mirror, I looked like a virginal apparition.

Walking towards the hall, I met Maki. I could see approval in her eyes as she scanned my attire for flaws. When she found none, she led me towards the room where my next customer was waiting . . .

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(Sakura's POV)

My heart grew heavy with each step I took. In my mind, I felt as though I was betraying Syaoran but I know even if that was the case, I still had to do it.

I bowed to my customer who turned out to be a young man with piercing golden eyes and light brown hair.

"This is Emerald. She will serve you tonight and satisfy your needs," Maki introduced us and then she left. I cringed at her words but my face did not betray my emotions.

The man had a slight resemblance to Syaoran, a strong face and a well toned body but that was where the resemblance ended.

"Pleased to meet you. I am Hiro Najime."

I bowed and started to pour him some sake. His hands closed over mine when I handed him his drink. "Emerald, you are really beautiful."

Empty words from the heart. Men could only see beauty and nothing past that but still I lowered my eyes in mock embarrassment.

I felt nothing when his lips touched mine or when his arms went around me, molding my body to his. Not even a start of desire but still I carried on my role.

I parted my lips obediently and slowly wrapped my arms around his neck as though I was hesitant. Hiro's eyes were dark with desire as he drew labored breaths. Now for the kill.

I pressed my lips to his, drawing his tongue into my mouth while my hands roamed his body. He was already hard with desire and both of us were still clothed. I rubbed my body against his and he trembled. It was too easy to manipulate him.

I slid his shirt off his chest and slowly unbuckled his jeans, sliding my hands down his length. I rose to meet his lips again, ignoring my thoughts about how sordid and boring this was.

Smiling to myself, I pushed myself away and looked at him. His eyes glazed over as I slowly untied my yukata, letting it pool at my feet. My bra stripe slid off my shoulders and I removed my bra. His jaw nearly hit the ground and I could see that he was happy with what he saw.

I closed my eyes when he kissed my neck. An image of Syaoran appeared in my mind and I moaned with delight. Hiro mistook my moan and thought it was caused due to his actions, grinned and peeled off my panties. His erection more evident in his briefs.

"I want to feel you inside me," I whispered and he quickly disposed off his briefs. We both fell on bed, kissing and teasing each other.

I tore open a condom and rolled it on for him. He did not protest, he did not even seem to know what I was doing, his mind only filled with lust.

"I can't wait any longer." He thrusted into me and I was filled up with his length. Only a few moments before this ordeal is over.

I pictured Syaoran's face, imagined that he was the one making love to me and I climaxed with a shudder. Feeling my release, Hiro gave a groan before emptying himself, withdrawing his already softening erection.

I prayed hard that a pregnancy would not result from it. Although I always took precaution, this time there was a need that it would not happen.

"You were good, my sweet." Caressing my face, Hiro placed a soft kiss on my lips. I could not tell him that the only reason why I could go through with it was because I pictured Syaoran making love to me. The memory was deep in my head.

Hiro fell asleep with exhaustion, his arm around my waist. Tears rolled down my cheeks as I forced sleep to claim me.

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When I woke up, Hiro was gone and in his place were a note and the payment for the night. The note read:

Darling Emerald,

I enjoyed my night with you and I promise you I will return to your welcoming arms.

With love,

Hiro

I crushed the note and flung it to the door, guilt overpowering me.

Maki came in and I hid my nakedness beneath the blanket. She was smiling.

"I applaud you, Emerald. You have won the loyalty of the heir of the Najime Foundation. He was very pleased with you and left me a big tip," Maki smiled, her eyes filled with delight. "I shall forgive you for what happened and make sure that it does not happen again."

I hid my disgust behind a smile. To her, I was nothing but a toy, something that just earns money. However, if not for her, I would have been abandoned on the streets after my father and Touya died. Many times, I have cursed them for not letting me go with them, for letting me stay behind on this blasted earth but if not for them, I would have died along.

Scenes of that night filled my mind and I desperately tried to rid them off my mind.

"I am tired. I would like to rest now." Lying back on to the bed, I shut my eyes tightly, feigning sleep. If she knew I was pretending, she did not show it but just left the room, shutting the door after her. . .

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Soon days turned into weeks and it has been about a month since I was with Syaoran yet each day turns into a deep longing to be with him.

I have seen him on magazines and newspapers, picturing him with other glamorous girls. Jealousy burnt through me but there was nothing I could do. It was not as if I was faithful to him, sleeping with every guy that comes my way.

Hiro soon became a regular like all my other customers, however unlike others; I felt that he was falling in love with me, just like Ryu. He did not show it but his actions were always very obvious, showering me with tiny gifts. I could give him my body but I could never give him my heart. I always pretend that I was happy to receive his gifts, feeling another burden being placed on my shoulders.

Yet when I received a huge gift box from him, I was very surprised. The box was neatly tied with a huge bow and it was relatively light.

"Open it." Hiro's arms encircled me as I sat on his lap.

Hesitantly, I slowly untied the bow and lifted the cover. Inside was an emerald dress covered with tissue. It was beautiful yet it was not as breath-taking as the dress I had on when I was with Syaoran.

Cursing inwardly, I sighed. I had to get Syaoran out of my head. Surely this was not good for my mental health and I would never see him again. I must move on.

Hearing me sigh, Hiro looked at me worriedly. "Is the dress not to your liking? I was so sure that you will like it."

I shook my head. He really had it bad. "The dress is lovely," I assured him. "But what is the occasion?"

"My friend is holding a ballroom party tomorrow night and he invited me to bring a companion. A female companion." He grinned, chucking me under the chin. "And I couldn't help but think of you. Would you do me the honors of accompanying me to this party?"

Immediately my first thought was to reject his offer. It was simply not fair to him as he should have someone who loves him.\

"B-B-But it will cost more to have me taken out and I couldn't bear for you to spend another cent on me!" I pouted prettily, hoping he would take the hint and take back his offer.

However my efforts were wasted as he grew to be more persistent. "I don't care about the money. All I wish is for you to go with me," he pleaded insistently. "Please my darling. Maki has already allowed me to do so and now all I need is your consent."

Maki agreed? That means I had no choice but to accept as that was what she wanted.

Feeling my heart grow heavier, I agreed to go. Hiro was so happy that he showered me kisses which I responded half-heartedly. I had a bad feeling about this and it seemed to grow with each second. Something was going to happen yet I did not know what it was.

"Go and try on the dress. I want to see whether it fits," Hiro urged.

I took my clothes off and slid on the dress. It did not matter to me whether Hiro saw me naked or not. He saw me too many times undressed to be counted. The dress was a perfect fit. It hung on to me like a glove and showed my every figure. It was an off-shoulder dress with a long slit up the thigh.

"I don't know whether I like you in or out of this dress. They are both so provocative," he whispered huskily, his hands moving up and down my back. "I think I prefer you out of it. It seems easier that way."

Before he could even remove my dress, his cell phone rang. He cursed then excused himself to answer the phone. I thanked god for that interruption, another surprise and I would have fainted dead away.

"I am so sorry. It appears that my company is having problems with a new system and they require my assistance," he apologized profusely, kissing me lightly on the lips before deepening the kiss. "I will pick you up tomorrow night. I will make it up to you, I promise."

When he left, I walked to my cupboard and opened it. I took out the dress Syaoran bought for me and hugged it tightly. It was the only reminder of our time together, other than the memories I have of him. Each time I held on to this dress, I ached inside but yet I could not bring myself to get rid of it. It was like a sting in my skin. It hurt for it to be in and it hurt like hell to take it out. It was a no win situation. I would still feel pain both ways.

The dress Hiro gave me was beautiful indeed and it complimented my eyes but its value paled in comparison to the dress I held. If I had to go to the party, I wished with all my heart I could wear the dress Syaoran bought but in doing so, I might anger Hiro and Maki would blame me once more.

I kept the dress back into the cupboard, hiding it from Maki and all other occupants of the brothel. They would surely take the dress away and keep it as their own.

I walked to the window and waited for what tomorrow had in store for me. . .

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Hiro opened the door for me as I alighted from his car. Before my eyes were a huge mansion yet it was smaller than Syaoran's. Hiro held my hand as we walked up the steps, giving everyone the impression that we were a couple. I went along with the act; I could not afford to do otherwise.

I wore the gown Hiro gave and styled my hair in a chignon with a long wavy lock down my back. Hiro looked dashing in his suit which looked as though it cost more than his car.

He led me inside, the party already on its way. He introduced me to the host and hostess to which I greeted with great politeness. His arm snaked his way possessively around my waist as he introduced me as his "girlfriend".

I managed to muster up a smile as I tried to engage with a conversation with them. They were all pleasant people however I could not quite feel at ease. I felt as though someone was staring at me, eyes boring at my back.

I turned my head and scanned the room and found the culprit across the room. I felt my legs root on the floor, quivering like jelly. My tongue felt swollen and useless and my heart was thumping like crazy.

Why was he here? It could not be so coincidental that we will meet. Japan is so big, the possibility of us meeting is so slim and yet it happened.

His eyes were like shards of ice piercing through me and when he saw Hiro wrapping his arms around me, his eyes narrowed and hardened even more. His companion was a pretty brunette with a body so perfect that she was no doubt a model. She was trying to engage him in a conversation to which he answered but his eyes never left me.

"Emerald?" Hiro's voice jolts me and I turned and looked at him. "Mr Hakata was asking if you wanted a drink."

"Sorry. I was just gazing around. You have a lovely home Mr. Hakata."

Mr. Hakata swelled with pride. He was obviously very proud of his home and even more obviously in love with his wife. He kept gazing at her even when she left us to welcome other guests.

"What were you looking a-." Hiro faltered in his words as he turned his gaze to where I was looking at before. Then a huge grin broke out across his face. "Yo Syaoran! Over here!"

I felt my heart stop. I knew something would happen but I did not expect something this big would occur. How on earth did Hiro know him? I was so hoping to ignore him and avoid making contact with him. I knew he would not come to me after I had broken his heart and left.

Syaoran walked towards us, his arms leading the brunette forward. It was the exact same gesture he saw Hiro doing to me. He was doing it on purpose; he knew that I would not be able to ignore it.

"Emerald, this is Syaoran Li. One of Japan's hottest singers and one of my closest friends," Hiro introduced, his voice filled with warmth. It was obvious that he held Syaoran in high regard. "And Syaoran, this is my girlfriend Emerald, We have been seeing each other for about a month now."

Syaoran introduced his companion as Rikiko Sanada. I recognized her as one of the models for Vogue. However to my relief, he introduced her as one of his friends, not that it would make any difference to me. I was destined never to be with him. It was forbidden.

"So you say you have been dating for a month huh?" Syaoran's eyes flared up and narrowed dangerously on me. "Well I congratulate you Hiro for having such a beautiful woman by your side." His words grated on the word "beautiful" but no one except for me noticed his sarcasm.

"May I have the honors of dancing with your companion, Hiro?" Syaoran asked, his voice suddenly soft.

My eyes pleaded with Hiro to not accept but he did not receive my message. "Of course. Now Ms Sanada. May I escort you to the drinks table?"

Hiro led Syaoran's companion away, leaving me alone with Syaoran.

"Well Sakura," his voice sarcastically calling my name. "You certainly look beautiful with that dress on. Hiro bought it for you? I remember you once said that you did not have any gowns. It is a pity that Hiro did not realize what a great actress you are. I am sure you would let him down nicely as you did with me!"

I backed away cautiously. His every word dripped with sarcasm and cruelty and was like a blow to my heart. He would not understand that I did all that just to save him. Save him from the tangles that would hurt him if he was with me.

I looked at him coldly. I cannot allow him to faze me. "Nice of you to ask of my wellbeing, Syaoran. I am sure I have never felt more welcome than I do now."

With that I walked away only to have Syaoran grabbing hold of my hand tightly. "We need to talk."

"I have no time to entertain your childish antics." I tried pulling away my hand.

"We need to talk NOW!" Syaoran bit off, dragging me to one of the rooms. His grip every bit powerful as it is painful.

"I have no wish to converse with you and will you please let go! We can't just enter people's rooms without asking!"

"Yes we can. Mr Hakata is every bit my friend as he is Hiro's. In fact," Syaoran snapped, his body shaking with anger as he pulled me along. "I was the one to introduce them. Besides, I have been offered one of the rooms to stay for the night and I chose this one!" With that, he pushed me into the room, locking him inside with me.

I was filled with loathing for him as well as anger that I could not form proper sentences. "W-W-What are you c-c-crazy?"

"Maybe I am!" Syaoran shouted, backing me into a corner. "I would like to know what the hell you are doing with Hiro! I can't believe you can actually move so fast."

"What about you? You are the one that have been reported to have a hundred of flings over this past month." I could not believe his nerve. He was the one conquering all the female all over Japan! "What I do with Hiro is none of your business!"

"Hiro is one of my close friends. I do not wish for him to be cheated by some money-grabbing bitch like I did!" Syaoran retorted, his words hurting me more than anything. "You don't even love him!"

I felt very numb but I was not going to let him have the final word. "How do you know I don't? In fact I love him with all of my heart! I love him more than I have loved anyone." Except you, I silently added but I was not going to let him know my true feelings.

Syaoran's angry retorts fell silent. His chocolate bangs hiding his eyes. I could not help but feel a shiver up my spine. Shouting and hysterics would be better than this.

Suddenly, he pushed me against the wall, his mouth on mine. His kiss was harsh and brutal and his tongue forced entrance into my mouth. I was so shock that I could not react. All I knew was that I had been waiting for this for a long time.

Without thinking, my arms went around him, drawing him closer to me. My mouth opened and I tried drawing his tongue into my mouth. His mouth softened and slanted over mine, his fingers already undoing my chignon, letting my hair fall down to my back.

I could not get enough of the taste of him. It was as if I was starving and was packing a lifetime into one kiss. His tongue skillfully swept the insides of my mouth thoroughly and I could not help but moan and shudder in delight.

"How could you even be with him when you are kissing me like this?" Syaoran murmured his lips against my neck. "Oh god. I missed you so."

"Don't speak. Just don't say another word." I arched desperately, wanting the feel of his lips on my body. When his lips reclaimed mine, my mind went blank, only with the thought of wanting him more and more. "Oh Syaoran. I love you so much." Oh shits!

In a brink of passion, I lost my mind and blurted out my feelings for him. Praying that he had been overcame with desire that it affected his hearing, I looked at him. He looked as though he had been stunned, the desire completely out of his eyes. The chances of him not hearing me declare my love for him was zero.

"What did you just say?" his voice completely soft. My eyes widened and I desperately scanned the room for an escape route. "Did I just hear that you told me that you loved me?"

"No! I did not say that! I mistook you for Hiro!" Oops! That did not sound so good. I was never good with words when I start to panic.

"You did not fucking mistake me with Hiro for god's sake! You said my name clearly and I heard it!" Syaoran's hands were clinging on to my shoulders and I had the slight suspicion that he would start shaking me anytime now. "Lie to anyone, even yourself but do not ever lie to me!"

Tears pooled in my eyes and I had to get out of his embrace soon before I completely break down.

"I need to go." I hurried ran to the door and turned it but it did not open. I had forgotten that Syaoran had locked it when he dragged me into this room.

Syaoran walked to me and drew me into his arms. "Stop denying it! I know you want me. Why did you hide your feelings from me?"

I started sobbing immediately. "Syaoran please let me go! I cannot stay with you. I will ruin you instantly. Don't' you understand? I can't be with you."

"Sakura what are you talking about? I can't let you go. I have wanted you for an entire month since I left you. I burn for you. I need you so damn much." Syaoran's mouth began to descend and with aching tenderness, started to claim mine. "I don't care if I am ruin. All I know is that I will be ruined if I am not with you. You are mine"

I was lost immediately when his mouth went on mine. I could not fight my burning desire for him. Like a fire, it would not be put out so easily. It had to consume and burn hotly before it would even begin to die out and that was only the starting.

His lips trialed down my throat as he removed my dress. "Say that you will be mine." His eyes bored on mine as he removed all of my clothing. "I will not allow any more men to invade you. You are only mine to see, mine to touch."

My nipples hardened at the sudden contact of cold and stood out at the light. His tongue circling and licking them, creating erotic sensations in my skin. Then he began to suck gently. I nearly collapsed in delight if he did not hold on to me.

He laid me on the bed and proceeded to remove his shirt. I marveled at the sight. It appeared that he added a few more muscles to his already impressive body. I ran my fingers down his chest, feeling his muscles bunch up. I love the feel of his body, the taste of him when he devoured my mouth.

The primitive strength in him enthralls me. Pulling him down on to the bed, I kissed him deeply, sucking hard on his tongue. I reached down, wanting to help him unzip his pants but I had another idea. I unzipped it slightly and slipped my hand into the space provided and zipped the zip up. He was as hard as a rock. I could not help but admire his restraint as I played with his erection.

He obviously needed release. Removing my hand, he took off all the clothes off my body. "That will be enough."

His fingers skillfully seek out the warmth between my legs. I shuddered, begging him to stop his sweet assault but he would not listen. He slid his finger in and out while repeating his actions in my mouth with his tongue.

"Say that you want me." His finger quickened with each word, causing stabbing pain of delight. "Say it now."

"Oh yes I want you. Oh God I want you so much."

When he replaced his finger with his tongue, I felt the first rush of release. Licking away, he gazed at me. "From now on, there will be no one else, promise me that."

"I promise." I held on to his erection while taking the tip inside my mouth and started to suck.

"Sakura!" he gasped out, breaking my hold on him.

He positioned his swollen erection at my entrance and without warning, thrusted deep inside. I cried out, feeling his strong heat inside of me. He began to move, each thrust swift and deep. My hips moved desperately to match his pace.

His mouth captured mine in a mouth opening kiss as he filled me up whole and finally seek his release. I felt him shudder, his mouth in a silent cry then he grew limb.

Both of us were exhausted. Our bodies covered with sweat and the room reeked of sweat and sex. I could hardly move my body but yet Syaoran was able to move. A mischievous glint in his captivating amber eyes.

"Ready for another go?" And with that, Syaoran began his lovemaking all over again.

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Finally exhausted, Syaoran laid down beside me, his arms bring me closer to him. I felt contented and strangely calm. I knew this was wrong from the start but the temptation was too great to resist. What he said at first was right. We had a connection with each other, a strange connection that brings us closer together.

I nuzzled his neck, inhaling his masculine scent while running my hands through his dark brown hairs. It seemed unfair that he should have such lovely silky hair and gorgeous amber eyes that most women would die for. I had to admit with his looks, body and skills, it was one huge package.

Kissing him on softly on the lips, I smiled as I watch him sleep. Funny how I never felt so happy when the other guys slept beside me. It was an indescribable feeling that I never had, not even with Hiro.

I immediately jolted up. I had completely forgotten about Hiro and the party. I got out of bed and quickly search for my clothes. I was about to zip up my dress when a lazy drawl was heard. "What do you think you are doing?"

I stared at Syaoran. His delectable body sprawled on the bed, his hair mussed and messy. His eyes smothered with desire and his lips curled into a satisfied grin.

"I have to get back to Hiro. He would be looking for me," I said as I checked myself in the mirror. My hair could not tie up anymore and I ran my hair through my fingers, not noticing Syaoran creeping up on me.

I turned and smacked into him, his arms holding me tightly. "I won't let you get back to him. You promised me that you are mine only and no one else. I will kill the next sorry bastard that lays his hand on you."

I sighed. Syaoran would have to understand that it was only for tonight. There was too much at risk already. "I came with Hiro and thus I must leave with him. It would only for tonight, although I cannot promise that my body would only be yours, only my heart."

"I want both," he growled, his voice shaking with anger. "I would do anything to have you, even if I have to kidnap you from the brothel, I will."

"The only way you can have me is by buying me from the brothel which I won't allow it," I said, laying my hand on his cheek, hoping to soften the impact of my words. "We can see each other often. I will still be with you, although not always. I can't have you spending money on me like this. You make me feel like some kind of item that needs to be bought."

"I don't want often, I want always. I can't stand the idea of sharing you," Syaoran said, raising his voice with every word.

Feeling suddenly exhausted, I had no wish to continue anymore. "You have already betrayed Ryu, I don't wish to add Hiro to the list."

"Then what about me? Have you ever thought about how I would feel thinking of another man having you? The thought makes me sick with disgust already!"

I kissed him, hoping to pour my feelings into this kiss. He responded with equal passion, moving his mouth over mine. "I don't want to talk about this anymore. Can we continue some other time?"

"Fine. If that is what you want," he replied with a grim expression on his face as he led me outside the room. Thankfully the party had not ended and was continuing enthusiastically.

I spotted Hiro and slowly walked up to him, pecking him on the check. I looked at Syaoran and saw his dark expression and disapproval at what I had done. I shook my head at him and gave him a smile.

"Where have you been? I have been searching for you," Hiro asked, concern evident in his voice.

"Syaoran and I went for a tour around the house and I somehow got lost and he had to go and find me," I lied, thinking of what to say next. Luckily Hiro changed the topic but it made Syaoran's already murderous expression darken even more.

"Thank god he found you. Or else I would not make up for you for last night," Hiro exclaimed, kissing me lightly before wrapping his arms around my waist once more.

"Last night?" Syaroan grated out, his eyes on both of us. I could tell he was already reaching boiling point and soon blows will be exchanged if something was not done.

"I had to leave her alone last night as something cropped up," Hiro explained, squeezing me on my butt. That action did not go unnoticed by Syaoran, who took a menacing step forward.

I quickly blurted out the first thing that came to my mind. "Hiro darling, I am tired," I pouted prettily, hoping that he would sent me back. I tried to look exhausted which quite an easy feat considering what I was doing just ten minutes ago.

"Of course. How inconsiderate of me. Good bye Syaoran. Would be seeing you soon." Hiro said his goodbyes and led me to his car. I turned back and saw Syaoran staring after us, an unusual glint in his eyes, as though he had some kind of plan.

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Hiro stopped me outside the brothel and was about to follow me in when I stopped him. "Hiro, I am really tired. Can we continue this some other day?"

Hiro nodded his head before kissing me passionately which I pretended to respond with equal fervor. Giving me one last kiss on the cheek, he left.

I sighed thankfully, happy that the night was over. I walked into the brothel and was met with Maki. I was so shocked that I did not notice the person beside her.

Maki greeted me and the next words she said shocked me the most. "Emerald, from today onwards you belong to Syaoran Li."

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TBC.

A/N This was a rather long chapter for me and I tried to make it as interesting as I can. I hope to start the next chapter soon if my schedule allows and I hope that you will continue to review and support me.