Clueless chapter 11

She died quietly. I had to do it. She was next on the list. At least her death was sealed with a kiss... But I must keep at it, time is running out.

"Cartman, how many times do I have to tell you? Get your greasy fingers off the cupcakes until they're cool." Wendy slapped his hand away. "You'll burn yourself."
"So glad you care..." Cartman rolled his eyes and slumped down into the dining chair next to Butters. "Can we give her aids tonight too?"
"Eric, that was so fourth grade!" Butters sighed. "But we can give her Chlamydia?"

"Did I hear the word cupcakes?" Stan asked, entering the kitchen and slipping his hand round Wendy's waist. "Wendy's cupcakes are the best guys, delicious."
"Is that an inuendo?" Kenny muffled, looking up from his video game."
"No, I tend to leave those up to you." Stan spoke smoothly and Kenny winked at him.
"It's not something to be proud of dude." Craig piped up from the opposite end of the table. "You need to grow up..."
"Yeah, you really need to grow up." Cartman agreed and everyone frowned at him.
"Oh what and like flipping people off all the time isn't immature?" Kenny scoffed.
"Yeah it's immature." Cartman nodded and everyone looked again.
"And you're a hypocrite." Wendy told Cartman, placing a cupcake down in front of him and then walking away. Cartman glared at her for a few seconds but seemed more intent on eating the cake.
"Yeah, we're definitely giving her chlamydia." Cartman whispered to Butters.

"Guys has anyone seen Bebe?" Kyle asked as he entered the room.
"I thought she was in her room." Wendy shrugged and everyone else gave the same reaction.
"Nope she's in there, just checked." Kyle frowned.
"Well you'd be the one to know about it, after what happened yesterday." Wendy smirked and everyone turned to look at her.
"What happened yesterday?" Everyone chorused, looking intrigued.
"Nothing." Kyle shot Wendy a look.
"Wow... I almost believed you there for a second." Stan droned sarcastically. "I've known you since we were babies, I can tell when you're lying."
"It'll be nothing interesting." Cartman voiced, matter-of-factly. "He probably just made out with Bebe or something..."
"Oh, yeah that's not interesting." Everyone shrugged, going back to what they were doing.

"How is that not interesting?" Kyle exclaimed, in a high pitched tone.
"Because it's you and Bebe." Stan raised his eyebrows. "We thought that happened a long time ago."
"Yeah, you're meant for each other." Wendy fantasised, staring into space.
"Well clearly not that much..." Craig muttered, staring down at his phone.
"What? Why?" Kyle whined, clearly pissed off at how no one was interested in the fact he had finally pulled.
"Because she took off." Craig said in an uncaring tone.
"Took off?" Wendy repeated.
"Yeah, just checked my phone and she texted me this morning." He raised his voice slightly.
"Why would she text you?" Kyle pulled a face and then checked his phone again, ensuring he had not been alerted of Bebe's disappearance.
"Hahaha!" Cartman sniggered, pointing at Kyle gloatingly. "She didn't text Kyle! She didn't text Kyle." He sang joyfully. "Clearly not a match made in heaven, it's probably why she left! It was probably your kiss, it's not like you've had much practice!"

"What and you have?" Kyle retorted, cooly. "Shut up fatass, at least I'm not still a virgin."
"I'm not a virgin." Cartman lied, looking across at Butters. "He is."
"Yeah well maybe you can lose your virginity together then." Kyle shot and turned back to the conversation in hand. "What did she say Craig?"

"Ehem." He cleared his throat. "Hi Craig, first number in my phone as I deleted Cartman's number after the prank calls and Butters is too lame to have in my phone..."
"Fair-play." Butters shrugged and continued with his dot-to-dot.
"Oi, those prank calls were awesome!" Cartman objected and everyone rolled their eyes.
"Shut up fatass." Kyle yelled and Craig returned to reading the message out.
"...So I'm hoping you'll let everyone know that I've gone back to South Park as my grandma has died. The holiday was a blast, but I have to pay my respects. Have a good holiday and please don't worry about checking up on me."

"Wow, dropping like flies aren't they?" Kenny's eyes widened.
"Yeah, how odd..." Stan nodded.
"She didn't even mention Kyle." Craig looked over the text again.
"Clearly wasn't that memorable." Cartman grinned, cramming another cupcake into his mouth.
"At least I've kissed someone." Kyle argued.
"I've kissed someone." Cartman preened and everyone frowned.
"Who?" Kenny muffled.
"Wendy." Cartman pointed his podgy finger in her face.
"When?" Stan questioned, looking disturbed.
"3rd grade, in assembly, you all watched." Cartman cried and everyone shrugged.
"Clearly wasn't that memorable..." Kyle smirked and everyone laughed but Wendy, who surprisingly did not seem bothered by the situation.

"...Bebe's grandma is already dead." Wendy piped up, looking confused.
"What?" Stan inquired, turning to face her.
"Her grandma died last year." She recalled and everyone looked at one another.
"What about her other grandma?" Butters chimed in.
"Died before she was born." Wendy frowned, looking up at Craig. "Are you sure it says grandma?"
"Um... Yeah, says it right here." Craig checked his phone again.
"Maybe she just used it as an excuse because we're all so boring." Kenny voiced.
"Who'd use their grandma's death as an excuse?" Stan shook his head.
"Me." Cartman admitted, bluntly.

"I'm going to go and call her." Craig sighed, beginning to leave the room.
"Craig, you can't, she told people not to check up on her." Wendy yelled, following him out of the room along with everyone else.
"Well she also told us her grandma died and that's a lie." Craig hissed. "Look I'm just going to check she's ok." He began walking up the stairs dialling the number.
"She will be, don't interfere in her business!" Stan seconded and they all continued to follow Craig up the stairs.
"I should be calling her if anyone is!" Kyle tried to reach for the phone.
"Well you can all listen." Craig raised his hands.
"Kyle, stop thinking you're so important!" Cartman shouted, grabbing the phone out of Craig's hand. "I want to have a few words with this lying slag."
"She's not a slag Cartman, give me the phone!" Kyle chased after him as they ran along the landing and up the next flight of stairs.
"Guys, you're not allowed into the top floor!" Stan bellowed, running after them, followed by everyone else.
"Cartman stopped at the top of the stair case and everyone stared up at him as he put the phone on speaker. Kyle was on the step below, followed by Stan, then Wendy, then Craig, then Kenny, then Butters.

Everyone waited as the phone began to ring... And then another phone responded.

Ring ring... Ring ring.

The gang stood with baited breath, confusion written all over their faces as the phone rang out.

"What was that?" Kenny questioned, breaking the silence.
"It's coming from behind that door." Kyle pointed to the big wooden door that lead to the third floor.

There was silence until Cartman shrugged and spun around, twisting the door handle firmly as the door creaked open.

Everyone followed him through the door, with Stan still muttering how 'no one should be up here' under his breath.

It was pitch black in this new room which no one had seen before. Well, no one but one of them. Wendy clicked on the light and screams of terror and gasps of horror sounded.

There, lying on the floor, were the bodies of Tweek, Token, Clyde and Bebe...