Disclaimer: I do not own any of these characters. I am not Stephenie Meyer. The Twilight series is owned by Stephenie Meyer. No copyright infringement intended. Obviously, there is a lot of dialogue from New Moon. I'm not saying that it's mine, it belongs to Stephenie Meyer. Only what Edward is thinking is mine.
Author's note: Finally! It's actually my plot now. Some of the things that Edward does are what Stephenie Meyer says he does but what is Edward not telling Bella?
Jacob
After I had watched Bella sleep fitfully through the night, I reasoned that since I hadn't seen her for the entire day, I could see her all day. The thought made me giddy with happiness. After Bella had tried desperately to talk to Charlie about the "cult" Jacob was in and tried to call the Black's house she drove to La Push. I stood on the boundary line and hoped that Jacob's house wasn't so far in that I couldn't hear. Bella drifted in and out of my range of my hearing. It was extremely irritating not being able to listen to every conversation she had. She talked to someone named Quil for a while. She took him home and stopped outside what I assumed was the Black residence. She sat for about a quarter of an hour when there was a sharp rap against her truck window. She gasped, startled.
"What are you doing here, Bella?" Jacob rumbled in a deep voice. I immediately connected this voice to the brown-red wolf in the meadow.
"Jacob?" she asked in disbelief. He must not have usually been that rude. I tried to concentrate on his elusive thoughts.
What… doing here? Doesn't she… I am? She… smart. Usually… things out pretty quickly. Especially… Edward. His thoughts were angry and jealous when he thought my name. Was he her boyfriend or not? And his thoughts kept drifting in and out of my range. It was all very annoying.
"What do you want?" he said with echoes of his anger in his tone.
"I want to talk to you," she said, perhaps not as furiously as she had hoped.
"Go ahead." Bella don't listen to me. So… sorry. Can't… stop lying. Control. Control. Control!
"Alone!" she hissed at him, gaining some of her anger.
Can I do it? Can I… not kill her? Have to… Sam.
"Okay."
"You know what I want to know," she said almost pleadingly. When he didn't answer she said, "Can we walk?" I could almost hear her silent plea. Hopefully they would move in my direction so I could hear better.
"Let's get this over with." Look at what you're doing to her, stupid! Stop being so mean! She looks like how she did after the bloodsucker broke up with her. A brief mental image of Bella at her worst flashed before, causing me to cringe in guilt.
"It's not what you think. It's not what I thought- I was way off," he said exhaustedly, weighed down with grief.
"So what is it, then?" She demanded answers he could not possibly give. I almost felt pity for him.
"I… can't tell you."
"I thought we were friends," she stated unfeelingly.
"We were." I still want to be, Bella. I love you! I love you! My pity immediately evaporated. How dare he love my Bella? She was mine. But wasn't this what I wanted? Someone human. No. He was half human. I could kill him. He would probably put up a fight. I would win. Or die trying.
"But you don't need friends anymore. You have Sam," she imitated his blind love of his alpha. "Isn't that nice-you've always looked up to him so much," she added sarcastically.
"I didn't understand him before," he stated simply.
"And now you've seen the light. Hallelujah." Again with the sarcasm. I smiled, loving how her words were like acid on his skin.
"It wasn't like I thought it was. This isn't Sam's fault. He's helping me as much as he can." His voice burned with rage.
"He's helping you," she repeated. "Naturally."
Jacob was taking deep breaths. Calm. Calm. Think. Think. Think of freaking ponies if you have to, Jacob. Rainbows and freaking ponies. Get. Under. Control. N-O-W. I was impressed with his control. But Bella probably realized something was wrong. She had to get out of there.
"Jacob, please," she beseeched him. "Won't you tell me what happened? Maybe I can help."
"No one can help me now," he moaned pathetically.
"What did he do to you?" She said with barely contained fury in her voice. She kept blaming Sam. Ha! If not for Bella's obvious pain, this would have been extremely entertaining. She must have reached forward to brush his arm in comfort because he immediately said,
"Don't touch me." If you touch me I'll explode. Too much emotion.
"Is Sam catching?"
"Stop blaming Sam." Did Sam tell his little pack to defend him whenever possible? No wonder Bella thought it was a cult.
"Then who should I blame?" She shot back at him.
"You don't want to hear that."
"The hell I don't! I want to know and I want to know now!" She said shrilly.
"You're wrong!" He snapped at her. He was being rude to her. If he loved her like her said he did, she would know by now. He hadn't imprinted on her. Thank God. Almost everyone imprinted, contrary to their legends. He would hurt her if he left her for his "soul mate". Then maybe she would come running back to me. I was lost for a minute in my happy fantasies. Then I remembered they were still talking.
"You're being ridiculous." For some reason, she sounded like she was talking to two people.
"Fine. I won't argue it with you. It doesn't matter anyway, the damage is done."
"What damage?" She shrieked at him. I smirked.
"Let's head back. There's nothing more to say."
"There's everything more to say! You haven't said anything yet!"
I heard footsteps walking away from her. "I ran into Quil today!" she shouted at him. The footsteps stopped but no sound.
"You remember your friend Quil?" she asked, bitter sarcasm in her perfect voice. "Yeah he's terrified." She was rubbing it in.
"Quil?" He asked stupidly.
She added salt to his wounds when she said, "He's frightened that he's next."
Jacob mumbled something and began and succeeded in breaking a nearby tree.
There was a short silence then Jacob stated "I have to get back to Sam."
"Back to Sam!" she shouted. He mumbled something I couldn't hear from the distance.
"Wait!" She pleaded. The same words she said to me. She must have been in so much pain. Dumped by the two people who seemed to have loved her the most.
"Go home, Bella. I can't hang out with you anymore."
"Are you… breaking up with me?" So had they been going out? It seemed like they were just friends. I prayed it was just a poor choice of words.
As they got closer and closer to the house I strained to hear what they were saying.
"…why? Sam…other friends? …Jake. …Promised. I need you!" It sounded like she was choking.
"…sorry, Bella," he sounded like I had when I had left her. Each word was painful (for her) in its own special way.
"…don't quit on me now, Jake. I…take it."
I wished desperately wished I could hear what Jacob was thinking.
"…not you. …all me. …not about you."
I assumed she said something so softly I couldn't hear it.
Jacob spoke again. "…not good…friend anymore…. I'm not good." His voice was husky with emotion.
"You're my friend, that's what you are! Jake…." She shrieked so loud I could hear perfectly.
He said something indecipherable. It started to rain. I stood alone in the empty road waiting for her truck to come rumbling by. But it didn't. What was she doing? Standing in the rain? Probably.
I jumped out of the way when she finally came slowly out of the little town. Her face was empty of all emotion and for some reason she was clutching her heart. I couldn't tell if the water on her face was rain or tears. Eventually, after she arrived home, she put on her pajamas and crawled into bed. She stared at the ceiling and thought hard for a while. The tears began to stream down her face. Then she fell asleep. I looked at her through the window. For almost two hours I watched the tears still glistening on her face. I lifted the window and silently climbed in. There was no chance of her waking up but I still crept around like a robber. I stood over her slumbering form and just breathed in her delicious scent. I barely noticed the burn in my throat. Carefully, always carefully, I wiped away the tears from her porcelain face.
"I'm sorry," I whispered.
Edward is so sweet when he's breaking his own rules. Please review!!
