Have I ever said that this doesn't belong to me? I mean, the story line does as well as Katie and Carter and everyone else that doesn't jog your memory. I'm sad to say that Alex Rider, as hot as he is, belongs to A.H. Damn. Enjoy. -RC
Chapter Eleven
"Oh, Alex, it's so good to see you up and about. How are you?" Jack asked sitting down.
"Better. How about you?"
"Oh. Not bad."
"Be honest, Jack," he said.
"Is that what you've been learning here?"
"Sort of. Don't change the subject; I wanna talk about you first," he said turning in his chair to face her.
"Well, after I first admitted you, I was worried sick. And angry. I wondered why you would want to do something as drastic as suicide and why wouldn't you tell me that you were thinking of suicide. I know you've heard this before, but that's how I felt. After that, I felt useless because strangers were going to be closer to you than I could. But then, that girl, Katie? She started calling me and I felt guilty because someone else was telling me about you. But it was the only information that I had so the guilt sort of abated."
Jack looked over at Alex and cried, "What's wrong?"
"I'm so sorry that I put you through that. I knew you felt bad, but not that bad. I was just so angry and hurt that I didn't care how others felt because no one cared how I felt, you know?" he said quietly as tears rolled down his face.
Jack reached out her hand and softly wiped his tears with her fingers.
"For that, I'm sorry. Come here, honey," she said as she opened her arms.
Alex leaned into her and allowed her to hold him. For the second time in his life, he didn't try to mask the pain because hiding the pain led to a deadly spiral that he didn't want to or couldn't get out of. He knew that Jack was there for him but he didn't realize how much until then. Katie had a weird way of putting things in perspective.
When he had felt that he had shown enough emotion, he slowly pulled back.
"Thanks for that, Jack. So," he said casting around for a topic that steered away from his emotional state, "you wanna see my room?"
"Yeah, I'd like that.
888
"This is where I sleep and talk to Katie," he said walking into the room, which finally showed some of his character. Instead of the bare white walls Jack saw the last time, Alex's side was filled with books on football and science fiction. There were even a few posters of his favorite team. There was even a bean bag chair and a few sketch pads lying around.
"Where is Katie?" Jack asked, glancing towards Katie's side and sitting down on his bed, that was made for once.
"I don't know. I told her she could join us," he said sitting down on his desk chair.
"Maybe she wanted to give us some time alone, so we could talk. So, about that."
"What?"
"That talk. When are we going to have it?"
"Now. It's time I told you."
For the next hour and a half, Alex told Jack about all of his missions and the way he felt before, during, and after each one of them. By the time he was finished, Jack was crying and he didn't think that she could handle Maria just now.
"I should have done something, Alex. I shouldn't have stood there and let them do that to you."
"Jack, you did what you could: be there for me when I got home."
"Alex, you tried to kill yourself! If that's not a big flag that I wasn't doing enough then I don't know what is!"
"Jack, they would have used me no matter what. If you would have stood up to them, you would have been deported and not allowed to come back or worse. I would have been sent to some fucking orphanage in Wales or something and they still would have used me. Face it, Jack, I'm good at what I do. Did."
Jack gave him a watery laugh. "You always were able to make me see it your way, even when you were trying to get out of homework."
"Yeah, well, I'm a spy."
"Was a spy," she said firmly and they shared a smile.
888
"Have you talked to Tom?" Alex asked as he bit into his burger covered in ketchup.
"No, have you?" she asked, talking around her chicken ceasar salad.
"Nope. I need to talk to him, to explain."
Jack nodded her head and they ate in silence for a few moments.
"What do you think he'd say?"
"Alex, you've never cared what others thought of you, so why start now?"
"I never let what people thought of me get to me. There's a difference."
"Okay, I'll give you that," she said pointing her fork in his direction.
"So, what do you think?"
"He would wonder why you didn't come to him."
"Yeah, that's what I thought."
Just then Carter walked in and started on his rounds around the room.
Alex called out to him. "Dr. Carter."
Carter smiled and walked over to their table. Before he seated himself, he extended his hand to Jack.
"Nice of you to come down for a visit."
"I've missed him. He's almost back."
"Hey, I'm sitting right here," Alex said with a pout.
"Yeah, and?" she asked with a mischievous glint in her eye.
"Oh, I see. Go on ahead and talk about me behind my back. See if I care," he said as he got up to put their trays up.
Instead of going back to their table, he decided to go outside on the balcony. On his way there, he stopped to check his room to see if Katie was there. She wasn't. He had a sinking feeling that something was going on with her and he was going to find out what it was, even if she said otherwise.
