Jack watched as a five year old Danny raced around the sands, happily running away from the camel that chased him.

"Danny!" A strong voice called. Danny stopped, turned and patted the camel, then raced toward his father, who scooped him up in his arms. "You've been wearing out Suskoo again, haven't you?" Jack frowned. He knew the words were being spoken in Arabic, but something was translating for him. He understood every word.

"He's fun! Daddy, when's Mommy coming back?"

Melbourne Jackson chuckled. "She's back now, that's why I came to get you. And she's got a surprise for you!"

Danny wiggled to get out of his fathers arms, screaming in shrill joy. "Yay! A surprise!"

Jack wrapped an arm around Daniel's shoulders, seeing the tears and smile on his face. "You were loved, Danny," he whispered in lover's ear. He felt Daniel's hand move up to squeeze his in thanks.

Danny was racing across the sands, having no more difficulty running on the shifting stuff than any normal child would have had running across grass. He ran right around the corner of a tent, and Jack stared.

The woman standing in front of him was beautiful. He had always expected Daniel's parents to be geeks, but perhaps he should have known better. Melbourne Jackson was a fair sized man with a strong face full of character. Claire Jackson was a small woman with the bluest eyes Jack had ever seen, even bluer than Daniel's. Her face was delicate, and when she smiled at the small boy she caught in her arms, Jack could see the same beauty of soul reflected in that smile that he could see in Daniels.

"She's beautiful, Daniel."

"She was, yeah. I'd forgotten, how pretty she was. The last image I had of her-" Daniel stopped abruptly. Jack squeezed his shoulders again, recognizing that perhaps these good memories were even more painful for Daniel than the bad ones.

"She deserves to be remembered, Danny, and she deserves a smile from her son," Jack repeated. Daniel looked up, surprised, then he smiled and nodded.

"Mommy! Daddy says you have a surprise for me!"

Claire laughed. "I do, Danny!" Turning, she brought out a leather bag. Jack squinted, and immediately recognized the leather tool case Daniel carried around. It was in considerably worse shape than the one Claire was handing Danny, but still recognizable.

Danny opened it carefully, and squealed in delight as he saw the case was full of the same tools his parents used. Face shining, the child looked up.

"Thank you! Now I'm an archaeologist too!" The Jackson's laughed as one, the arms they held around each other indicating the love between them was as strong as the love they had for their son.

"Not quite, Danny. But you have just become our official helper. You'll have to be careful, and listen to everything your mother and I tell you. If you do that, then I think we can start training you. We'll have to step up your studies," Mel warned. But Danny was still grinning.

Jack glanced at Daniel, and saw that same sad smile on his lips. Realizing he was being looked at, Daniel shrugged.

"They did it, too. Trained me as though I was their apprentice. Sometimes they were tough on me, but I never complained. It was what I wanted to do most in the world. You see, Jack, why I stayed with it after they died. They worked so hard to train me. I wasn't going to let that go to waste. Archaeology was everything to my parents. They could have easily put me to the side, and continued with their careers, but instead they got me involved. I was never given the chance to be jealous of their work, because I was so much a part of it. It was hard work, and I loved it."

Jack nodded, a small part of him wishing he could have had the type of job that would have allowed him to involve Charlie. Just then, a funny thought struck him. Military, Special Ops, and a thousand missions that could have left Charlie fatherless, never had.

Instead, it had been two archaeologists who lost their lives in the line of their work, leaving a small boy an orphan. Somehow, Jack decided, the fates had messed up. The Jackson's were supposed to be safe. Were supposed to have been able to raise their son in relative peace.

Daniel's quiet words interrupted his not so happy musings. "You know, if it had happened here, then I would have been fine. Rashid would have taken me in. He and my father went to University together. They've been working together ever since. There was a part of me that loved him as much as I loved my parents. But it all goes back to the Stargate, doesn't it? If that had happened, I wouldn't be where I am today."

"Danny, it doesn't make you a bad person to want the life you've got. You've paid a hefty price to be here. That you're willing to go through it all again in order to still be here, it just makes you a stronger person than most. And we already know you're ten times as stubborn," Jack joked.

He was surprised when Daniel didn't laugh. Instead, he had a very large frown on his face, as though he were trying hard to remember something. "Danny?"

"It all goes back to the Stargate," Daniel repeated to himself, moving forward. The memory hadn't ended like the others. The Jackson's were gone. It was only Jack and himself standing outside a tent. Daniel started moving toward it. There was something niggling at the back of his mind. Something here he knew he needed to remember.

Jack followed, unsure what Daniel was doing, but knowing enough from the expression on Daniel's face to realize he was working something out. He followed Daniel into the tent and watched as he knelt by a small cot. From the various stuffed camels on the surface, Jack gathered this was Daniel's bed.

He watched as Daniel got down on all four, and searched under the bed. A groan of frustration came from Daniel.

"It's too soon. We need to move on to another memory," Daniel announced. And with that, the scene changed.

They went through a few happy memories, and each one, Daniel searched under the bed. Finally, he seemed to find what he was looking for as the Jackson's celebrated Danny's 8th birthday.

"Daniel, what are you looking for?" Jack asked. Daniel held up an object wrapped in leather with a grin.

"This! I found it on my very first dig. I kept it, because I knew my parents would never let me. So I hid it. I never knew what it was. I was never able to translate it. I lost it when they died. Here, Jack." Daniel handed it over to his friend.

Curious, Jack carefully unwrapped it, and gasped. It was a tablet, with seven Stargate addresses on it.

"Daniel?"

"I didn't know what it was. I had completely forgotten about it until now. Jack, four of those addresses aren't on the Abydos cartouche! Three of them aren't among the ones you downloaded! Three brand new gate addresses! Give me a minute. We don't know when this memory will end, and I need to memorize them."

Jack watched as Daniel worked, stunned. Daniel had barely paid the least bit of attention to the passing memories in his search for this tablet. Everything they had been through had suddenly faded to the background. Jack could sense Daniel's total focus on the object in front of him. Nothing else existed.

Jack felt his dream falling away from him. He sensed something vitally important was happening here. He was being offered a choice. He could allow Daniel to bury everything that had happened in the light of this new discovery, and thereby protect him. Or he could force Daniel to face everything they had seen, and what it meant between them.

This is my test, Jack realized. He glanced at the birthday party being had in the background. And it had become just that. Background. Daniel had dismissed it completely.

"Daniel."

"Jack, I'm busy. I've got to get these into my head before we lose them. They could be important," Daniel replied absently. Jack marched over to the young man, and grabbed the tablet. "Hey!"

"Daniel. Look. That's your birthday they're celebrating. Those are your parents. Your friends. The last birthday you ever had with them. Don't you think it deserves to be watched?"

Daniel sighed. "I remember it, Jack. As much as I need to. This is more important. This is an incredible opportunity. If these addresses work, then we have three new worlds to explore, with little chance of occupation by the Goa'uld. That's worth more than a cake and silly hats."

Stung, Jack lowered his head. "It's never been about the work for you, has it? It's a mask. Something to hide behind. If you don't see past your own little world, then you don't have to see the reality of the real world. You'd never have to open these crates if you were too busy doing everything else, worrying about everyone else."

Daniel remained silent, knowing that at least part of what Jack had said was true, and unwilling to lie about it. He didn't understand why it seemed to hurt his partner so much. Whatever his reasons, he was a workaholic, and Jack had known that.

"Is that why you hold back from me?" Jack asked sadly. "Is that why whenever things get too tender, or too emotional, you delve into a translation, or an artifact? Because when I finally let you down, at least you'll still have your work to go back to?"

Anger flared through Daniel that Jack was turning this into a personal attack. "And what if it is? You're my best friend. And we went through hell together. We were almost coming apart at the seams in friendship. Forgive me for needing a safety net. It's not you, Jack. It never has been. I love you. I want this to work. But I just can't see it happening. As this little test should have proven, I have issues. Deep ones. How long are you going to put up with it? How long before you figure out I can never be the man you want me to be?"

Taking a deep breath, Daniel looked stricken. He hadn't meant to say all that. He could see the hurt in Jack's eyes, and he knew that, at last, he had managed to destroy this precious relationship before it had even had a chance to begin. But, then, maybe that's what he'd been subconsciously trying to do from the start. He wasn't worthy of Jack's love. He never had been. He never would be. He knew that. And he knew it was only a matter of time before Jack figured it out too. Time to finish this.

"I could never give you everything you deserve, Jack. I think we both know that. I've been fooling us both. Maybe it's time the truth came out. I've never loved anyone like I love you. Not even Sha're. What we have goes so much deeper than that, but it's not enough. I thought it could be. I really did. I'm sorry. So sorry to have dragged you into this."

Jack glanced toward the party. He saw the totally happy smile on Danny's face, and wished he could put that smile back on Daniel's face. Sadness welled through him as he realized Daniel still hadn't looked over at the simple, but festive scene.

"I would hope that wherever he is, Charlie remembers his last birthday with us. It was larger, fancier than this. But the love was no different. Funny how totally different your last birthdays were, but all the basics were the same. It was never about the cake, or the silly hats. It was about being loved. It was about celebrating the light that person's life brought into the lives of those around him. It was about having people around you who were glad you were born. Watch them, Daniel. You made them happy. Not their careers, not the upcoming project at the museum. You. They lived for that smile."

Jack turned to his lover, watching Daniel try and stare through the scene in front of them, and failing. Tears brimmed those blue eyes, as Daniel shook his head. He didn't want to remember that life had been better. That he'd been loved. He didn't want to remember that his parents had given it all up by standing underneath a heavy coverstone.

Kneeling down in front of his lover, Jack reached over and cupped Daniel's face. "If you were worthy of their love, why not mine?"

"Jack, please don't. I can't think about that again. In some ways, this memory is the most painful one of all. You could lose so much for me. It's just not worth it." Daniel's plea broke Jack's heart for the thousandth time since this test had started.

"You stand to lose just as much. Being beaten up everyday by homophobic marines isn't exactly a pleasant thought. They could, and eventually would, drive you out of the Stargate program. A little closer to home. What will General Hammond, Doctor Fraiser, Carter and Teal'c think, if they ever found out? Could you stand to be seen as less in their eyes? Am I worth those risks, Danny?"

"Yes!" Daniel answered firmly, and through his connection, Jack felt the truth of it.

"Are you sure? I'm a mean old soldier who has, can and will probably kill again and again without thought, for his country. I've been a POW. I'm a father who didn't teach his son to respect guns. I'm a husband who was so wrapped up in himself he couldn't see how much his wife was hurting. And didn't care. I'm a man who accepted a suicide mission just to escape himself. And I'm a friend who let his best friend down when he needed me the most."

"And each of things worked to make you who you are today. I love everything you are, and were, and will be."

"Then why is it so hard for you to believe that I might feel the same about you? I'm ready to retire for you. Just so I can shout how much I love you from the rooftops. So I can kiss you in the middle of the grocery store. So I can hold your hand when we go for a walk. God, Danny. I want all that and more. If I'm more than those things I said, then it's because of you. You've changed my life for the better. You've been a guiding light in even the darkest times. How on Earth can you believe I can do better than you?"

Daniel licked his lips then looked over at the memory again. Seeing for the first time since the day it had really happened the happiness in his parents. The sheer thrill of having surprised him. He felt the warmth of the sun, the smell of his mother's perfume, his father's cologne. He could taste the slight spice in the Egyptian air. He felt an echo of that moment's happiness.

Closing his eyes, he smiled. The few times he'd ever taken this memory out, it had been clouded and darkened with grief. Would his parents be out there somewhere, hurting because he had chosen to remember only the event itself? When it was the smaller details that had made the day so perfect? It had been the last time he'd ever felt completely loved and safe.

Until Jack. There was a safety in those strong arms that he hadn't felt in such a long time. There was a tenderness, a gentleness in every small touch, every expression of comfort, or support. Even their banter expressed a security in their friendship, in their connection, that they could do this without offense. A trust that ran so deeply between them that it had never been questioned.

At least, not until had let his own self-doubts intrude. It was the next revelation that hit him. He opened his eyes quickly, and stared at Jack.

"You loved me all along."

Jack smiled gently at the wonder in Daniel's eyes. He nodded. "In one form or another, Danny. As you loved me. It wasn't until our brains got in the way of our hearts that we started to go wrong. And this memory is more than just one more thing to be buried. This is your last chance to refresh all these scents, expressions, and laughter. You've been given a gift, Danny. Don't throw it away. Not for some gate addresses you've already got memorized. Not for me. Take a moment and allow this to happen. "

Daniel nodded, and turned his full attention back to the small scene. Pain welled in his heart for the parents, the security and the love that he had lost. But he was realizing he had made it lost to himself. All he'd ever had to do was look back at this one special day. All the information was here. Every nuance gave a hint at the joys surrounding the small group of people. And countless other memories had been stored away, hidden.

He'd been convinced he didn't deserve the happiness he was witnessing. These precious memories had become dusty, and cloudy with self- doubt and grief. He let the tears fall for the first time since his parents had died. He let the love of those two people swell in his heart. He let the laughter flow through his soul. Closing his eyes, he tilted his face toward the sun, letting the sounds filter through.

Jack watched silently as his partner embraced the memory for perhaps the first time. There was pain, yes, but also joy. It was hard to stand by and simply watch. Hard to see the pain, the tears, and not rush to hold Daniel. Wrap him in his own arms and keep the world out. But he knew Daniel needed this. Maybe he wasn't the only one. Maybe the idea wasn't to try and protect Daniel from everything. There were some things, Jack suddenly realized, he had to let Daniel experience on his own. Good or bad. Jack's role was to be there and comfort when it was over.

"Guess we both had lessons to learn," Jack murmured.