The day passed rather quickly. Jim came and spent the afternoon with Kate and Castle. The conversation was light and comfortable. Kate decided not to fill her dad in on the recent developments just yet. She didn't care if he knew, but she just didn't want to talk about it anymore. If she told him, she would have to talk about it. Her conversation with Castle had been draining enough. Thankfully, he decided it wasn't his place to tell Jim and let Kate guide the conversation without bringing the topic up. Jim headed out after dinner.
"Do you care if I stay tonight?" Castle asked a few minutes after Jim left.
"No, it's up to you."
"Well then I will."
"You sure?"
"Yeah, let me just call Alexis and my mother so they know," he said.
"How was Alexis last night?"
"Good. I think she's handling things really well."
Kate just nodded.
"You shouldn't feel guilty about anything. You know that, right?"
"Yeah, I do," she replied unconvincingly.
"But knowing it and believing it are different things."
"Yeah, they are."
"Kate, you didn't do anything to feel guilty about."
"I put so many people in danger."
"Everyone is fine, and everyone is going to stay fine," he answered.
"Your family should not have to go through all this."
"Neither should you, but we are in this together."
"I know, but..."
"But nothing. Everything is going to be ok. No matter what we'll figure it out. This is not your fault and you did nothing to deserve what happened to you. Got it?"
"Got it," Kate whispered after a moment.
"I'll be right outside," Castle said as he gave her hand a squeeze and stood up.
He kept his call brief. Martha and Alexis were not surprised he was staying at the hospital and promised to come by and visit tomorrow. When he went back in Kate's room, Amy was in there, so he just took a seat.
"How are you feeling?" Amy asked as she recorded her latest vitals check in Kate's chart.
"Good. Kinda tired, but no pain really."
"Something wrong?" Castle asked noticing Amy's tone was slightly concerned.
Amy nodded and turned back to Beckett, "You're running a fever."
"I feel fine," she said quickly.
"It's only 100.1, but we want to be really careful about infection. Dr. Geller is on call tonight. I'm going to page him and see if he wants to give you anything," she explained and headed out.
Castle got up from his chair and went to stand by Beckett's bed.
"I really feel fine," she said softly.
"I believe you," he nodded and leaned in to kiss her forehead. "But you are warm."
"I didn't want any more setbacks. After that arrhythmia..."
"Hey, let's see what Dr. Geller says. It could be nothing, like you said you feel fine."
"Ok," she answered and laced her fingers through his.
Amy and Dr. Geller walked in a few minutes later.
"How are you doing tonight, Detective?" The doctor asked.
"I thought pretty good, but I guess not."
"I wouldn't worry yet. I want to do some repeat blood work, but I took a look at yours from this morning, and it doesn't look bad. We look at your white blood cell count as indicator of infection. Your count is on the high end of the normal range, but still within normal. The concerning thing is that it is higher than it was yesterday. Not by a lot, but I still would like to start you on a low dose of antibiotics and some fluids to be safe."
"Why didn't you guys do that this morning?" Castle asked.
"Like I said her white count isn't abnormally high, and she wasn't showing any symptoms, so there wasn't a need yet. Now that she has a fever that changes. We want to be careful about the amount of antibiotics we use since she was on a pretty high dose right after surgery. It was important to head off the initial infection risk, but we need to watch that we don't overuse them," Dr. Geller explained.
"Ok," Castle nodded.
"I need to take a listen to your lungs as well. They've been clear, so if there is fluid starting to build up it's another indicator that an infection is starting. Pneumonia can be a big problem after the kind of surgery you had. We want to stay on top of everything," Dr. Geller told Kate.
"Ok," she answered and began to lean forward.
Castle put his hand on her shoulder to help.
"I'm fine," she bite out quickly. Kate knew she was being snippy, but she really didn't want to deal with this right now.
"Ok, take a deep breath," Dr. Geller said as he placed his stethoscope on her back.
Beckett did as she was told. Well, she tried. Deep breaths were not the easiest thing in the world.
"Another," he instructed as he moved the stethoscope to the other side of her back. "Ok, sounds good. We need to get some new blood work and see if your white count is continuing to increase, but your lungs are pretty clear so it looks like we are catching it early. That's very good. We can stop the infection before it gets strong."
She just nodded.
"Try to get some rest," he said and left.
Amy drew some blood and started Beckett on the fluid solution. "Dr. Geller will decide what antibiotic to give you after he sees your lab results. I'm going to be heading home for the night, but Julie will be here if you need anything," she told them kindly and headed out.
"Do you want me to call Lanie?" Castle asked.
"No, I'll call after my blood work comes back, or maybe in the morning. He didn't seem to think it was a big deal."
"Ok."
"This sucks," she huffed out.
"I know. I'm sorry."
"Not your fault."
"Anything I can do?"
"Nope," Kate shook her head.
They sat in silence for a few minutes. Castle wanted to say something, but he didn't know what to say.
"I really wanted to get out of here a few days early," Beckett admitted after a some more time passed.
"Maybe you can. We caught the infection early, so the antibiotics should knock it right out."
"Yeah, hopefully."
"And you've been doing really well the past few days."
"Yeah, it's just that things were going well. Lanie said I was most likely to have another arrhythmia within a day or two after the first one, and after that I was probably safe. So I was finally over that fear and now there's a new problem."
"I know this has to be impossible for you," Castle said taking her hand in his. He kept waiting for her to yell at him about the constant need for contact, but she didn't.
"It's not easy on you either."
"I'm here with you. I'm doing ok."
"I just want things to be back to normal."
"They will be soon."
"Well I don't want everything to go back to how it was," Beckett said with a small smile.
"What do you mean?"
"Us. I don't want us to go back to denying everything."
"Me neither," he agreed with a smile of his own spreading across his face.
"I do wish we could have gotten here an easier way though."
"Definitely. I'm not a fan of this method," he agreed.
They looked into each other's eyes and the love between them was almost a physical thing in the air. Nothing mattered but the two of them. Castle couldn't help himself, he leaned in to kiss her. But he snapped back to reality and turned to kiss her cheek.
"I don't think I'm contagious, Rick." she chuckled.
"Hmm?"
"You can kiss me."
"Oh, um, I didn't think, uh."
"God, Castle, so eloquent."
"Sorry, I just... I'm so glad we took these steps forward in our relationship. So glad, but I'm not really sure what I'm allowed to do," he explained.
"Whatever feels right. I'm not in charge here. We're equals. Figuring it out together, right?"
"Yeah, together, " he smile.
"So..."
"So..."
Castle leaned in again, but just before their lips met-
"I have your lab results," Dr. Geller announced walking in the open door.
A/N: I'm a cruel person lol Forgive me because this chapter is really early. Thank my biochem professor for moving my exam back. I promise the real kiss is coming soon. I've had my fun. Thanks for reading. Thoughts? Yay for reviews!
Disclaimer: I own nothing
Also some shameless story advertising for a previous story of mine
SPOILER FOR 6x04:
I wrote a story a while back about Castle's vest coming to the rescue if anyone would like to check it out in light of recent events. It's called Close to the Vest. Different circumstances but still relevant lol
Meagan
