a/n: Small warning I'm skipping around a bit as you know, so this is right around the end of their senior year, and there is a very small amount of sex in this chapter.

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Emily stood front and center in the middle of the crowded room, everyone around her either in Army dress or high end dresses and suits. She scanned the crowd looking for people she knew before she sighed and started.

"Every thought you've ever had as a child was always free and fun loving. You never worried about war or money, or what was happing in your family. We unfortunately can't get back to that time again, no matter how hard we try. Just like we'll never be able to get Andrew Debus back. Andrew was a great guy, and I honestly don't know why he asked me to give this speech but it's what he wanted. Andrew was suppose to return from tour for a three week visit with his wife and newborn daughter, on his way to the launch site his platoon came under fire. Andrew will never see his daughter grow, he'll never watch his wife have more kids, and he'll never grow old with his wife now. Andrew was too young to die, and yet he was the biggest kid I ever knew. Every time I saw him even after his first tour he was smiling and cracking jokes, dirty jokes no less. He reminded me so much of being in 6th grade and not having a care in the world. So to Andrea his daughter, live life without a care in the world but be safe, and your daddy loved you very very much." Emily stepped off the stage, it wasn't her first time giving a speech in front of so many people but she still felt ill. She knew Andrew would be proud of her and thankful that not much was said about his solider life because it wasn't his whole life. Emily made her way to the hall and to the restrooms; she immediately lost the contents of her stomach. She rested her head against the stall wall and cried. Andrew being 8 years older than her was one of the diplomat's sons that she met as a young girl, and he loved her like a little sister so naturally she loved him like a brother. Emily pulled her legs up to her chest and sobbed. She didn't even lighten up when someone walked in. when her door opened and JJ sat down next to her and wrapped her arms tightly around her.

"I'm so sorry Emily." JJ kissed Emily's cheek. "No one should have to do that." Emily grabbed on to JJ's collar pulling her close she bawled.

"My mom didn't even come!" JJ felt her throat tighten up; she started rubbing small circles on Emily's back. "She loved him! Swooned over him! Wanted me to marry him."

"Emily…"

"I love you. I love you. I love you, don't you ever leave me. Please." Emily cried looking JJ in the eye.

"I wont."

"Thank you…for coming here."

"Nothing could've kept me away." Emily nodded and cried into JJ's shoulder. JJ held Emily close rubbing her back. Shocked didn't even fit what she was when Emily kissed her forcefully, but she fell right into it. After a minute or so Emily started kissing down a panting JJ's neck, she stopped and sucked at her pulse point.

"Emily…not here." JJ moaned and Emily quickly stood up, pulling JJ with her. Emily pulled her out to her car her mom sent her in and tapped the divider window signaling to go.

"Yes Ms. Prentiss."

"Ugh! Don't call me that!" Emily yelled to the driver who apologized. Emily turned back to JJ and started kissing her again. JJ kissed her back pulling her closer till Emily was sitting in her lap. Emily braced herself with a hand on either side of JJ's head kissing her fiercely.

"Emily…" JJ cupped Emily's cheek looking at her softly. "I know you're hurting but dealing with it this way isn't going to help…" She kissed her just as softly as she previously looked at her. "I love you Emily Prentiss and tonight I'll let you do what you want but I promise that it won't happen like this each time." JJ wiped the tears away from Emily's face and kissed her again allowing Emily to take over once again. This time Emily wasn't nearly as fast or forceful, she took her time to admire her lover. Emily lowered JJ to lie across the full length of the back seat. She kissed down JJ's neck sucking lightly at her pulse point. Before she could leave a mark she moved down to her collarbone, she shifted to slide her thigh up between JJ's, making and keeping pressure on her center. JJ moaned starting to move against Emily's thigh, JJ took Emily's hand and moved it down her body o the top of her skirt. Emily gave a pitiful smile and started bunching the skirt up. She ran her fingers up JJ's legs barely brushing the skin. Emily kissed her lightly, running her hand all the way up her thigh when she was met with heat she stopped.

"Emily…" JJ looked up at Emily her eyes a few shades darker. Emily kissed her gently, moving her panties to the side she eased two fingers in to JJ. JJ gasped and rocked against her hand. Emily kissed JJ's neck working her fingers in and out slowly. JJ wrapped her arms around Emily who grabbed them and forced them over her head. Emily picked up pace and quickly added a third finger. Rotating to hit every spot she could with her bent knuckles Emily watched as she brought JJ up to the very tip of the edge. Smiling she flicked her thumb over JJ's clit and watched as she crashed over the edge. Emily fixed JJ's panties and skirt, staying cuddled up with JJ. When JJ calmed and came back to herself she wrapped her arms around Emily.

"Baby," JJ held Emily as she cried. When the car rolled to a stop JJ wrapped her arms around Emily's waist and helped her into the house. She took her upstairs to Emily's room and watched as Emily crashed on the bed. JJ grinned and pulled Emily's clothes off down to her underwear and then did the same, she curled up next to Emily and held her close.

"He was there for me when mom would leave, when I just needed someone to not be a friend or a parent, when I needed a mix of both." Emily said about an hour later, breaking the silence.

"I remember" JJ kissed her shoulder.

"Emily…" There was a knock at the door, it was Emily's mother.

"No." Emily whispered. "I don't want to deal with her tonight."

"Emily." The door opened and Elizabeth walked in. "Emily, I should've been there…We need to talk." Elizabeth walked over pulled Emily up out of her bed. Emily sighed and followed her mother out of her room, she looked back at JJ and mouthed she'd be back and she was sorry. Elizabeth led Emily downstairs and into her office. Emily walked over and sat down legs draped over the arms of the chair.

"Alright mom you have 10 minutes to rip into me as much as you want before I go back upstairs to JJ."

"Emily…" Elizabeth looked an almost naked Emily over, she knew JJ was making Emily stay fit but she never realized how fit. Emily's body looked like it was sculpted from marble, arms defined and abs even more so. Elizabeth couldn't see an once of fat on her child. "Emily if I've told you once I've told you a million times that child doesn't cross my threshold without my knowing about it! I don't care that I've known her since she was just born I do not want her in my house. You will not settle down with her instead of a man." She watched as Emily stood and leaned against her desk.

"What says I can't? I love her and she loves me."

"Your naïve Emily." Elizabeth sighed. "You'll go to Yale and won't have to worry about her anymore, she wont even think about you darling. Now this is the last time she will be in my house understood?"

"No. She's always been there, where were you when I had nightmares as a child? Where were you on my birthdays? Where was I on Christmas and Easter every year? Where was I every birthday I had? Where was I when I couldn't get a hold of you 9/11? Where were you compared to JJ?" Emily waited for a moment before going on. "Not here! I was at JJ's or Jordan's or Garcia's! You were half way around the world! JJ's mother held me as I cried because I couldn't find you when the pentagon was hit! I spent every Christmas and Easter that dad couldn't make it home at JJ's! Now tell me again about love mother."

"Emily you know I love you!"

"Where were you today when I watched as Andrew Debus was lowered into the ground? Here, alone in this fucking house. Mother you know nothing about love." Emily looked Elizabeth up and down just like Elizabeth had her when she was sitting. "Look at you it's 1 am and you're still in a work suit, in your own home." Emily picked up the picture of her when she was 10, in a dress standing between her mother and father, it was amazing how you can catch happy for a split second. "Children had no spot in your life and yet you still had me. Just another thing to add to the great Elizabeth Prentiss wall here put me in-between the picture of you shaking hands with the Queen of England and the one of you selling your soul to the devil." Emily threw the picture back down on the desk and marched back to her room.

JJ looked up when Emily slammed her door.

"You ok?" JJ asked concerned.

"Yeah." Emily smiled, lying next to JJ, she pulled her to her and sighed. "God I love you. Everything about you." Emily kissed JJ's neck.

"I love you too." JJ smiled kissing Emily's hands.