Footprints in the Clouds
Part Two: The Shadowcasters
Chapter 4 - The Cabin Fever - Induced Plotline Hiccup
Day Three, Lunchtime.
Revan sat quietly in the common area of the Hawk, gingerly sipping at a cup of badly replicated soup. He briefly missed the presence of Gizka aboard the ship, as boiling one up with salt and large portions of hot sauce, chopping it into little, tiny bits and adding it to the bland broth might have made it taste just a little better than cleaning fluid.
As he continued fantasizing about better food, Mission bolted through the common area like a frightened tach. His eyes followed her as she skid to a halt at the hyperdrive, flung her hands in the air while screaming at shadows and ran toward the cargo hold. Moments later, he heard her screech just before the entire ship shuddered, sending the steaming liquid he had been trying to drink all over the crotch of his pants.
He yelped as the liquid seeped through and stood up abruptly. Canderous came in from the cockpit the moment he did, which was also just as mission skulked through the common area toward her quarters looking like she'd narrowly escaped a thermal detonator. Moments later, Bastila crossed briefly through the room, a self-satisfied smirk on her flushed face.
Canderous looked back to Revan, who was inspecting his pants.
"Man, if you're that scared of your own woman, there's something wrong with your relationship."
Revan paled as the Mandalorian turned back towards to cockpit. He could just make out the snigger that came from the other man's general direction.
Day Seven, Mid-Morning
The sudden jerking about of the ship was so intense that it nearly knocked Revan off his feet. He raced to the cockpit, only to find that Carth and Mission were on top of the matter. Their hyperspace jump took them a little closer than Revan liked to the gravity well of a black hole, but all it did was rock them a little. They were on course, on time and alive, the latter being most important of all.
He suddenly felt a sickening sort of pain rush over his link with Bastila, and shot off toward their quarters. He found her in the fresher, puking her guts out.
"You're sick? I thought that you were over that."
She shot him the dirtiest look he'd ever recalled seeing her shoot. "I thought Mission was too young to drive!"
Day Twelve, Early Morning
A loud roar of indignant manly rage echoed through the paper-thin bulkheads of the ship. Revan heard it from the cockpit and rushed out to the common area, just in time to see everyone else scatter like cats in a rainstorm.
Canderous came into the area seconds later, every last inch of his stark naked frame as red as his force aura. Revan's eyebrows shot up as the obviously angry Mandalorian cast peevish glares all about the room. In one hand, he held a pair of underwear. In the other, he held a simple undershirt.
"All right you little blue twerp. What did you do with my clothes!"
A strangled noise came from behind the wall of Juhani's little spot. Suddenly, a blue finger reached around and pointed to a set of cabinets on the far wall. Canderous flung them open, grabbed his clothing and threw the underwear and shirt to the floor before stomping away.
Revan cast his eyes downward. The underwear had little red hearts on it, and the shirt had the word "Booty-licious" printed across it in glittery pink ink.
It was the former Dark Lord's turn to snigger.
Day Seventeen, Evening
He was quietly reading somethingorother in his quarters when another loud crash echoed through the Ebon Hawk. He winced, having noticed that the crash sounded less like the normal sound of a human body getting thwacked into a table or lodged in a bulkhead and more like a droid shattering into bits.
Examination of the common are revealed a very agitated Bastila standing facing a battered HK-47.
"Exclamation: Master! Help! Your meatbag concubine is trying to destroy me! You must stop her! It would be a shame for my perfect engineering to be marred or damaged by such a lackluster opponent!"
She lifted her arm. An unseen hand grasped HK by the neck servos and bashed it repeatedly into the wall.
"I." :bash: "Do." :clunk: "Not." :slam: "Like." :thwack: "That." :crunch: "Term!"
And for good measure, the unseen hand lifted the droid to the ceiling, then dropped it to the floor.
Revan winced again. "Honey, it's going to take days to fix that!"
Her cold glare was all the answer he needed. He quickly turned around and retreated back to his quarters before she turned him into the same kind of sparking, twitching scrap heap she'd converted HK into.
Day Twenty-Four, Mid-Afternoon
All hell broke loose right after the Freedom and Liberty hailed them.
Mission was on the run from both Bastila and Canderous, having reprogrammed the fresher to blast the Jedi with nothing but cold water and provide the Mandalorian with nothing but pink laundry. HK, upset over its recent "incident," also had it in for a certain pregnant Jedi. Jolee had the misfortune of catching the small flamethrower blast HK had intended for Bastila, singing what little hair he had remaining, and Mission ran into Juhani, then moved just in time to let the rotten fruit that Bastila and Canderous had armed themselves with miss their intended target and hit the bewildered cathar. Carth and Dustil, in the middle of another argument, looked up in time to see both fruit-wielding crewmembers barrel into the common area and straight into them. Juhani, more than a little peeved, chased them with handfuls of what had landed on her. HK came from one end, Mission the other, and the common area was a big mess of bodies when Revan, Zaalbar and T3 arrived to see what was happening.
Somehow, Revan got swept up into the giant pool of bodies. Somewhere in the fray, he lost his pants.
This was the scene when the first Republic officer boarded the ship.
"Uh…sirs?"
They all stopped and looked up.
"The, uh…the Admiral wants to speak with Revan and Bastila briefly before the squadron gets underway."
Revan crawled out from underneath everyone else, snatched his pants from around T3's optical sensor and put them back on. Bastila stopped smacking Mission with HK's captive head and gingerly crawled off the mountain of bodies. They straightened themselves up, then left the Hawk with the officer.
They could both read the young man's trepidation.
"So . . . rough trip?"
Revan snorted. "No. Just about normal."
-
Hee.
Anyway. . .