I am so sorry this took so long. I have not been inspired to write lately. This isnt very long and I am not too sure on it. Let me know what you think! Reviews seriously make my day! :)
Chapter 11 - I'm not going anywhere.
Quinn's POV
Quinn was sat on the front table in the classroom feeling like she had been punched in the stomach. She couldn't understand how Rachel could believe the things Finn said to her. She obviously believed it otherwise she wouldn't be acting or dressing like that. She was trying to prove that she was good enough, or pretty enough, to be liked or spoken to. That had to be it, Quinn knew her, she knew that the Diva was trying so hard to be what everyone and society sees as good enough. Quinn just wished she knew that all the Diva had to do was be herself and she was better than everyone already.
Santana pulled her into a hug and Quinn let her final tear fall. She had to do something. Rachel needed to know that she shouldn't feel like that. She was perfect in everyway. She was everything Quinn had ever wanted and now it was time Quinn showed her. But how?
"Santana, I need to show Rachel that Finn is wrong. I just know she believes him." Quinn said as they left the classroom with their arms linked. She needed to show her that she was worth everything to Quinn. She felt a pang of guilt as she realised she hadn't yet told Rachel how much she really meant to her.
"I know you do, Q. I should too. God knows we haven't been the nicest people to her." Santana said, and Quinn could tell by the look on the Latina's face that she was deadly serious and was feeling regret in her actions. Quinn nodded in agreement and gave her a quick hug while she set off towards the cafeteria, hoping to talk to Rachel in private.
As she reached the cafeteria, she saw Rachel sitting with the rest of the Gleeks in the back, also noticing Finn was sitting with the football guys instead of his usual seat at the Glee table. It took everything in her to not go over to him and punch him in the face.
After taking a few calming breaths, she made her way over and joined them, taking a seat next to Rachel, who looked up and smiled, but not a real Rachel Berry smile like usual, it was one that said 'im in so much pain and no one even cares' and Quinn could tell.
After ten minutes of chatting about nothing, Santana joined the rest of the group. She sat across from Quinn and Rachel and instantly looked at Quinn with a knowing look. She too could tell Rachel was hurting. Having been there when Finn said most of her pain would probably help, but there was more to her pain than just what Finn had said.
The bell that signalled the end of lunch rang and Quinn saw this as her chance. She watched as Rachel got up with Brittany and walked from the cafeteria. Awesome, she's avoiding me. Quinn thought as Santana gave her a sad look and linked arms with her. They walked to class, which all four girls shared, and sat together at the back behind Rachel and Brittany who were having an animated conversation together.
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Quinn spent the whole class watching Rachel, and observing her body language. She decided that talking to her as soon as possible would probably be the best way to deal with the Divas fears and doubts. She knew it would only be a matter of time before the Diva did something she would regret. She needed to end her fears, but the only problem was what to say to her.
The bell for end of class rang and Quinn got up as fast as she could and beat Rachel to the door. As the diva approached Quinn smiled and grabbed her books for her. "I'll walk you to your locker then glee?" She asked.
"That would be lovely." Rachel said happily and lead the way. As they walked down the halls, Quinn noticed many people staring at their linked arms, but no one really seemed to think it was a bad thing. She couldn't see any glares, or anger of any of the students which she thought was pretty great, but people seemed a little uncomfortable. She laughed in her head thinking what they would do if she kissed Rachel infront of them.
Rachel opened her locker and took her books from Quinn, giving her a weird look as she noticed the blonde was lost in thought. "What's gotten you all quiet?" Rachel asked in an amused tone. Quinn looked at her and smiled, sensing the Diva seemed to be being her normal self at the moment.
"Nothing much. Just noticed people looked at us as we walked then. No one seems to care and we haven't even came out yet." Quinn said looking at Rachel's face to try and see what her reaction was.
Rachel smiled and put her books in her locker. "That's good. Oh! That reminds me! When did you want to do that?" Rachel asked, in a slightly hushed voice, so that no one could over hear them.
Quinn's brow dropped to indicate she was in deep thought and leaned with her back to the locker, watching people walk past. Rachel studied her face and could tell she was conflicted. Quinn looked at Rachel and gave a small smile. "I don't know. Part of me says soon, but another part of me is hesitant because of my mom and your dads and the school, you know, judging us." Quinn said and Rachel furrowed her brow in confusion. "Well, we don't exactly live in the most open-minded town." Quinn explained.
Rachel nodded in understanding. "Well, we don't have to worry about my dads."
Quinn laughed and linked arms with Rachel again as they made their way to Glee club. "It's not the being gay part that I'm worried about."
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"Alright guys, this week we don't have a proper assignment but I still want people to sing something. Whether it's to someone in the group, or to yourself, or a group number, I just want some great songs to be sung." Mr Shue said happily as he sat in his stool next to the piano. Quinn beamed and looked at Rachel who was staring at the floor lost in deep thought. "Alright, you can go off in groups somewhere or you can stay in here and figure out a song but just make sure everyone has something prepared and I'll ask some of you to sing your songs."
At that, Mr Shue left the room for his office and everyone seperated into their own groups. Mercedes, Tina and Kurt went off as one group. Mike, Artie and Sam as another group. Finn didn't show up, obviously still pissed about recent events. Puck and Lauren went off to the Janitors closet, which left Quinn, Rachel, Santana and Brittany to themselves in the choir room. Rachel looked around at the other three and looked towards the door.
"Not that I don't want to sing with you guys, because I do, but I really want to go this one alone." Rachel said looking to Quinn with pleading eyes, begging for her to understand.
Santana nodded in understanding and Brittany looked sad but nodded, grabbing Santana's hand. Quinn decided to hide her hurt and nodded. Rachel leaned in and kissed Quinn lightly before turning to leave. Quinn watched as her girlfriend walked away from her for the first time. If she was honest with herself, it felt like crap. She knew she wasn't really walking away from her, but in some way thats what it felt like. It wasn't like she wasn't coming back, she knew she would still have her girlfriend at the end of the lesson, but she couldn't stop thinking what it would be like to actually lose the girl of her dreams. And it scared the absolute crap out of her.
"I hope she's gonna be ok. I hate it when she's sad, it makes me sad." Brittany said with sad eyes.
"She will be Brit, we just have to talk to her ok?" Santana said and looked to Quinn for comfirmation. Quinn nodded but kept her gaze at the floor. How could she fix it when Rachel wouldn't even stay in the same room with her for more then ten minutes? She had to talk to her as soon as she could, before it got worse. She glanced at the couple and saw that they were talking and giggling again as if Rachel hadn't just stormed out.
Quinn was zoned out as Santana and Brittany continued gossip for what felt like hours and never even asked Quinn what she wanted to sing. They had been too focused on eachother and talking about what they were planning on doing that weekend. Quinn spent this time thinking about what she would say to Rachel to make her see that Finn is a douche and is completely wrong in everything he said. The Diva was unaware that Quinn knew he said something to her. She wasn't planning on telling her she knew about what he said until it was neccessary.
Deciding that she should actually do homework tonight, Quinn walked to her locker to pass the time and get her books. As she closed her locker after staring into it for about ten minutes, she checked her phone and saw it was 4.34pm. Four minutes past Glee ending, which means everyone would be long gone, and that would mean Rachel would be gone. Quinn sighed as she decided to stop by Rachel's house on the way home to talk.
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As Quinn walked slowly past the choir room to get to the parking lot, she noticed Rachel sitting on the back risers staring at the whiteboard absent-mindedly. She cautiously made her way to the door and silently slipped in as to not scare the Diva. Rachel saw her from the corner of her eye and jumped in her seat.
"Oh its you! You scared me Quinn." Rachel said with her hand over her heart, trying to calm her fast beating heart.
Quinn gave an appologetic smile and sat next to her in the risers. "I'm sorry, I was actually trying to avoid that." She said while she looked at her hands. "Rachel, we need to talk." Quinn said quietly and looked up to find the Diva with a look of comlpete sadness and realisation.
"You're breaking up with me." Rachel whispered as she looked down at her hands in shame. Quinn's eyes widened in fear and grabbed Rachel's hands, making Rachel look at her.
"No! Oh god, no Rach, I'm not!" Quinn said reassuringly. "I would never break up with you." Quinn whispered. Rachel smiled but then her brow dropped.
"I would never break up with you either." Rachel whispered back. "So, what is it you wish to talk to me about then?" She asked hesitantly. Quinn took a steady breath and looked at Rachel, she could see the sadness in her eyes even though she was trying her absolute best to hide it. She must have interrupted some serious thinking.
"Rachel, you are the most beautiful girl I have ever met." She continued as Rachel huffed in disagreement. "Seriously, you are. I know I used to tell you otherwise, but I honest to god was jealous of your bravery and confidence. You have always known who you are. I am only just learning who I am this year, and it's wonderful, because who I am is only happy being with you." Quinn wiped the tear that slid from Rachel's cheek. She saw that the Diva was having trouble believing her. She leant in and kissed the Diva tenderly on the lips. She rested her forehead against Rachel's and waited for a reply or comment.
"Quinn, as much as I would like to believe that, I just have always found myself preparing for people to leave me. It happened with Shelby, it happened with Finn. And I know that you have changed, but how I am suppose to know that you won't find someone better and-" Quinn put her finger over the Diva's lips and waited until she understood that Quinn didn't want her to finish that. Quinn leant in and kissed her tenderly once more.
"You, Rachel Berry, are the most beautiful person I have ever met. Inside and out. I will always be here to tell you that, because I know what it's like to feel alone, suffocated by my own thoughts and fears. To have one person cut me down and make me feel like nothing. I'm here to show you that they are wrong, I am going to prove to you that you are worth more than anything to me as many times as I can. I'm yours Rachel Berry, and I am not going anywhere."
Rachel let the tears fall, as did Quinn, and pulled Quinn in for a wet but passionate kiss. After a few seconds, Rachel pulled away and rested her forehead on Quinn's. "Please don't leave me." Rachel whispered, feeling the most vulnerable she ever has.
Quinn smiled and gave her a reassuring kiss. "I would never dream of it."
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Rachel's POV
"Does this mean you are going to wear your owl sweaters again?" Quinn asked as they lay on her bed with the TV playing a movie that they had not payed an ounce of attention to. They had been talking and holding eachother and sharing sweet, innocent kisses for more than two hours and Rachel was happy to lay there all night if they could.
"Hey! I thought you liked what I was wearing!" Rachel said slapping the blonde playfully on the shoulder.
"I do! But... In the privacy of your bedroom... Or mine." Quinn said with a wink. Rachel made a cute giggle and hid her face in Quinn's neck to hide her blush. "Seriously Rachel, I like them. They make me feel happy knowing you are comfortable at school, because I know you love them too." Quinn said pulling her head back to see the Diva's face, who was still blushing.
Rachel smiled and she nodded. "I do love them, they are so cute and are really comfortable." Quinn smiled and kissed the Diva's forehead to show she agreed. "So I was thinking... We should come out to my dads."
Quinn froze and looked at the brunette with wide eyes. "What, tonight?" She asked in a shakey voice.
"No, whenever you are ready. But I thought that if we came out to my dads, who are gay as well, then it would be much easier on you to be comfortable with." Rachel said, knowing that the blonde is still uncomfortable talking about her sexuality and confronting her feelings.
"Yeah, about that. I don't want to come out for a bit longer, if that's ok with you. I just, I don't want you to be bullied again. I know that I kind of put a stop to it and stuff but I don't want to risk you getting slushied ever again." Quinn said seriously, Rachel being able to tell there was something else but not wanting to push her girlfriend's comfort zone any further.
"Quinn, no one will slushy me, or you for that matter. So you definitely don't need to worry about that. And if they do, well, we have Santana to beat the crap out of them. Not to mention, Santana nor Brittany haven't been slushied as of yet so we should be fine." Rachel said trying to ease the blonde's worries. Quinn shifted hesitantly and looked into the Diva's eyes. Rachel saw there was something else worrying her but she didn't know if she should be asking.
"I- I don't know. Cant we just wait and see how this week goes?" Quinn asked in a shaky voice.
Rachel nodded and took the blonde's hands. "Of course, if you want to wait a month I will, but I don't think I can go that long without being able to kiss you whenever I want." She said as she leant in to kiss the blonde. Quinn smiled into the kiss and returned it.
"You're not suppose to be looking after me, I am suppose to look after you." Quinn said after the need for air became to much. Rachel smiled and kissed her again.
"It's not about one person being weaker or stronger than the other. It's about being there for eachother no matter what." Rachel said smiling sweetly. Quinn smiled and Rachel cuddled closer to the blonde. "That's why we work so well, because we look after eachother and can keep up with eachother emotionally." Rachel said through a yawn and closed her eyes to let sleep come. Quinn smiled and closed her eyes as Rachel ran her hand over Quinn's stomach soothingly. Rachel kissed the back of the blonde's hand. "We were made for eachother."
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Ok so that's that. Do you guys think they should come out sooner or later? Im not sure about it yet.
