"It's happening today!" Severus arrived with a pop.
Harry reached for his invisibility cloak as he heard his father speak, "Be careful Harry, we lost you once to that long bearded idiot. I don't want it to happen again."
"It won't happen again." Harry looked up to Charles' portrait, "I'm better prepared and know what he's like. I'll keep my eyes open."
"He'll watch out for the rest of us too." Remus pulled him to the floo, "From the window in the apartment above the shop."
"Remus!" Harry whined this was the part of the plan he wasn't crazy about.
"You can't afford to go Imp on them." Remus reminded him.
"Hurry." Severus reminded them before he popped away.
Harry arrived in the twin's apartment just as they were heading down to open the shop, "Harrikins!"
"Come to work at the shop for the day?" George grinned happily.
"No, unfortunately, death eaters are going to attack." Harry explained, "Do you have the traps set?"
"We did that several nights ago." Fred nodded, "We charmed the glass in the window so we can see where they are. Let's go have a look."
"Excellent." Harry gazed out at the multicolored dots on the window, "I knew you could do it."
"Stop it." George faked shyness, "You're embarrassing us."
"Here's the control panel." Fred attached an object to the window, "Each colored button will cause a reaction in the same colored prank in the same area as seen on the window."
"We'll each watch an area and push buttons to fire off pranks in our area." George added and pointed to the control panel and then a corresponding spot on the window, "If I pushed this yellow button, the yellow prank here will douse the prankee in itching powder that sticks and can't be vanished without our countercurse."
"Remember if Volde gets near an injury trap don't set it off." Harry reminded them, "I don't want him to have any excuse when I beat him. Caged traps are for him and Dumbledore if you can."
"Got it boss." They answered together.
The three of them got into position at the window. The twins had enlarged it enough for the three of them to stand together and see the whole street. Even the entrance to Knockturn alley was within their range. Harry saw a ward go up at the entrance of that same alley and knew Severus was there under the cloak. Remus was still in the shop. They'd leave the cloak behind the counter when the fighting started. Severus would join after Sirius/Voldemort was captured. The twins had been kind enough to make an exception on their spelled front wall. Severus could now come and go as he pleased.
Right on time pops occurred at each end of the alley. People in the alley began to run and scream as always. It was like watching billiard balls ricochet around the table after being hit. Remus called the order and aurors as planned. His excuse was Harry's scent trail had come into the alley again. More pops announced the next arrivals and soon enough there was a battle in the street.
"Volde." George announced before hitting a button, "Got him."
"Excellent!" Harry was grinning madly and punching various buttons only pausing to let Severus know to join, "What is this green one again?"
"Ball buster." Fred answered, "That's the one that jumps five feet in the air unless it runs into something."
"Well, Dumbledore will never have children now." Harry stated gleefully as he watched the old man crumble to the ground. The killing curse that had been aimed at Dumbledore's back hit the death eater he'd been fighting, "I can claim I was just helping him too."
"I don't even want to think about him having sex with anyone." George muttered, "Let alone having actual children or what they'd look like."
"Are you sure your cage will hold Volde?" Harry asked belatedly.
"If he tries to use any magic or touch the bars it hits him with a sleeping spell." Fred answered, "Even if he got his spell fired off he'd still be sleeping like a baby until the counter curse is applied."
"Remus tested it for us during the full moon." George added, "He didn't stay awake long enough to wrap his hand all the way around the bar. We woke him in the morning when he returned to human."
"We stayed in the protected room." Fred added before Harry could ask.
"I hadn't heard the results yet." Harry nodded pushing another button and chuckling evilly.
"We figured Remus would tell you." George shrugged before he cackled, "I got Malfoy."
"What did you get him with?" Fred didn't take his eyes off his own section. He had a few good death eaters on his end.
"The one we didn't bother naming." George cackled.
"Which button?" Harry asked.
"Silver." Fred explain, "That one takes his voice away first, then it makes his hands and feet go numb, it breaks his kneecaps and if he's still trying to use magic it makes his hair fall out."
"I used one on Bellatrix." Harry grinned, "I didn't see what all happened but she's still down."
"Fighting has stopped on my end." George stated.
"Mine to." Harry frowned, "I didn't manage get Dumbledore in a cage, though he is still down rolling on the ground from the ballbuster."
"We'll just have to keep trying." Fred clapped him on the back, "Aurors seem to have a handle on things. Can we watch you take care of You Know Who?"
"Sure." Harry grinned and led them down to the store, "We just have to wait for Remus and Sev to arrive."
"I'll go let them know where we are." George waved them off, "You head on down to the lab, that's where the cages are."
"Did any get near the door?" Fred asked.
George checked the spells on the door, "Two. Did you tell Harry about the courtesy cards?"
"Each death eater arrives at the ministry with a bow and gift tag saying complements of Weasley's Wizarding Wheezes, see us for all your pranking and crime fighting needs." Fred explained as they went to the basement lab.
Harry chuckled, "I bet they love them."
"Why is he just standing there?" Fred asked as they arrived at Voldemort's cell.
"I don't know." Harry cocked his head, "Do you have magic dampeners on the room?"
"Yes, to keep our spells and testing from hurting the upstairs merchandise." Fred answered.
"This will be easier than I thought." Harry chuckled again.
"You didn't start without us did you?" George asked when he arrived with Remus and Severus in tow.
"Our magic dampeners are doing something." Fred explained.
"I need to give him a potion." Severus held up the vial.
"What does it do?" Fred asked cautiously.
"I'll explain later." Harry offered, "Can you take some of the protections off so he can give it through the bars?"
"Whatever you want Harry." George shrugged and tapped the top of the cage with his wand.
"On three." Severus said after pouring the potion in Voldemort's mouth.
"One, two, three." Remus called the spell that he was assigned.
Harry and Severus followed suit and Voldemort was surrounded in a bright light that flashed three times before fading and in his place stood a simple old man.
"Harry, did you know that was going to happen?" Fred asked astonished.
"We did." Remus answered for him then addressed the old man, "Are you ok?"
The man turned to look at him for a moment before his eyes rolled up and he passed out. Harry and Remus looked to Severus for the answer to the unasked question.
"I suspected that would be his reaction." Severus commented lightly, "We'll have to keep him contained until we are sure he is free of influence."
"Contained to a bed in the manor?" Harry was just making sure.
"If you must." Severus answered glibly.
"What's going on?" Fred and George asked at the same time.
"The short version is this." Harry turned to them, "Voldemort died the same night as James and Lily Potter. Since then any sighting of him was actually someone either working with Dumbledore or under his control, like this guy here was. Dumby wants me to die killing Volde then he can finish him off and be the hero."
"Including the times you've faced him since coming to Hogwarts?" Fred asked.
"Quirlmort was being controlled by Dumby, spells on each of us made it impossible for him to touch me without dying." Harry explained, "I really fought the basilisk but the Tom Riddle I fought was another poor soul. The one from the graveyard was the same one at the ministry but when I saw Sev's memory of this Voldemort I knew it was a different person. Dumby didn't have quite as good of control on this one as he did the others."
"Then the diary that hurt Ginny?" George asked.
"Something made by Dumbledore." Harry answered.
"Let's go Harry." Severus put a hand on his shoulder, "Remus has already left."
"Ok, I'll see you guys later." Harry told them as he made his way to the floo.
"That went rather well I think." Severus stated when they arrived back at Harry's manor.
"Have we sent the decoy in?" Harry asked taking a seat.
"Yes." Remus replied, "I sent it along as soon as I returned."
"Where did you find a body to take Sirius' place?" Harry asked.
"I found him in an alley in London already dead." Severus explained, "A bit of the same potions and glamour that Dumbledore used and we have a dead Voldemort to turn into the ministry with enough injuries to denote a battle but no dark magic."
"Delivered to Amelia with your note attached." Remus finished.
"I need to warn the twins." Harry turned back to the floo, "I didn't tell them about the decoy."
At the ministry Amelia was pulled from her office by an auror who looked to be in a panic. She followed him to the middle of the auror office, where they had found the other two death eaters, and found a body floating above a few desks. Several aurors were trying to reach it but it kept floating out of their reach and their spells were deflected. When she arrived a paper airplane flew from the body. The note stated that this was Voldemort, Harry had killed him and his suggestion to toss the body through the veil before anyone could reanimate it and say Voldemort was back again.
Meanwhile Dumbledore was in St. Mungo's trying to get his privates repaired. He had just sighed with relief when the pain potions kicked in and the nurses had all left. His peace was broken when one of his pawns arrived.
"Albus, I have the most wonderful news." Kingsley smiled down at the man, "Not more than ten minutes ago Aurors threw You Know Who's body through the veil. Harry did it! The war is over!"
"That's wonderful news." Albus attempted to smile but his aggravation at Oliver Potter came through in gritted teeth.
"I'm sorry you're in so much pain." Kingsley misinterpreted the aggravation, "You probably aren't up for visitors."
"Not really." Albus agreed but tried to continue the charade, "But I am extremely happy about that news. Thank you for bringing it to me."
"Not a problem Albus." Kingsley turned to leave, "I just hope Harry will come out of hiding now."
Albus had never considered the order to be anything more than pawns or an audience to spread news of his greatness. He was barely able to control his anger until his auror pawn was out of the room. As soon as Kingsley was gone the glass of water beside Albus' bed shattered. He took a few deep breaths to settle himself. True, Oliver Potter had once again screwed up his plans but another opportunity would present itself. It always did.
"Headmaster?" the healer came into his private room.
"Healer Smith." He nodded serenely having calmed enough to present his grandfatherly image.
"How is the pain level?" he asked.
"Fine." Albus smiled, "Your potion master did his job well."
"Excellent." The healer sighed in relief, "If you were younger I'd worry about telling you this but at your age I'm sure sex stopped a long time ago. We had to remove the testicles because they were beyond repair. Other than anything of a sexual nature you should not see any other side effects. You'll be able to leave shortly."
"Thank you." Albus turned away from the healer and reached for his clothes, hoping to hide the anger on his face, "It will be good to get into my own bed for the night."
"I'll leave you to dress." The healer turned to the door, "A nurse will be in shortly to have you sign the proper forms."
"Of course." He managed to still sound nice despite the intense anger.
As soon as the man was out Albus got dressed and left the room. He tracked down the nurse, signed the papers and apparated away to his home in Godric's Hollow. There in his heavily warded basement he let out his anger.
"Wasumhapan." Harry looked up from his book to see the man on the bed waking up.
"Misty let them know he's waking please." Harry whispered before he stood and walked across the room, "How are you feeling?"
A groan was the only reply. Not knowing what else to do Harry sat on the edge of the bed and patted the shoulder nearest him, "You'll be fine soon."
Severus and Remus entered the room and Harry stepped away so they could tend to the man. A series of potions and spells later and Sirius Black was sitting up in bed.
"What's going on?" he looked at the three men around his bed, "Harry?"
"First what can you remember about the night James and Lily died?" Remus asked.
"Not a lot." Sirius scratched his head and took a sip from the cup of water someone placed in his hand, "I remember finding James' body. The next thing I remember I'm off hunting for Peter. I know I wouldn't have just left him there. I wouldn't have left Harry there. I just can't remember what happened."
"Should I explain it to him?" Harry asked the others.
"Wait for a bit." Severus stated, "Let's get him in a bit better shape first."
"Who are you?" Sirius stared at him, "Snape would never talk that nicely."
"Sirius." Remus huffed.
"It's ok." Severus grinned, "Under normal circumstances he is correct."
"What's going on?" Sirius looked dubiously at them all.
"We'll explain when you're not so confused." Remus said as he helped him sit up.
"I don't think I'll be less confused until you explain." Sirius stated.
"Ok Sirius, it's a long story but I'll give you the short, short version." Harry grinned, "Everything is Dumbledore's fault."
Sirius blinked at him for a moment before he replied, "Can I get just the short version?"
They spent the next hours getting Sirius caught up to speed on all that had happened and what was going on now. Harry had left for a while during the telling so that Remus and Sirius could morn the real baby Harry. When he returned he brought tea.
"Where did we get to?" Harry asked.
"We're finished." Remus informed him, "Where have you been?"
"Twins." Harry replied, "They asked St. Mungo's for the results of the pranks to see if any were something they could sell to the ministry. Evidently the ball buster causes unrepairable damage but the rest are perfectly fine. No one has seen Dumby since Kingsley told him Voldemort is gone."
"They named that one well." Remus agreed.
"Dumbledore is most likely letting off anger." Severus offered, "He doesn't do that at Hogwarts."
"You know…" Sirius paused mid-sentence before his thoughts were gathered, "Are you planning on telling him you know you're Oliver?"
"No." Harry shook his head.
"If he were to find out…" he began with a gleeful look on his face.
"No." Severus shook his head.
"But what if…" Harry started getting excited.
"He'd kill you." Severus turned to Harry, "He wouldn't bring up you 'killing' Sirius. He would just use a killing curse and be done. He doesn't have a reason to keep Oliver or Harry alive without Voldemort. He's already trying to get people to think you've gone dark."
"He's what?" Sirius gasped.
"No one believed him." Harry huffed.
"They were all ready to until I questioned it." Remus offered.
Harry nodded as Misty popped in, "Dinner is ready Master Harry."
"Thank you." He responded.
"There is also a special edition of the paper at your place." She added before popping away.
Harry was out the door running through the house before the rest were ready. Sirius watched him run off before he turned to the others.
"What's going on?"
"Book list?" Remus questioned with a glance as Severus.
"Has to be." Severus agreed and left ahead of them, "Come along mutt you'll most likely enjoy this."
Remus helped Sirius to his feet and down the hall. They could hear Harry's laughter well before they arrived to find him rolling on the floor. Severus had the paper and they could both see the vicious smirk on his face.
"Good news I take it." Remus stated as he help Sirius to a chair.
"They did indeed put it together and went a step further." Severus answered.
Harry had calmed by this point, "They did realize he wrote more than half the books on the book list. They're calling for his removal as headmaster and for all the proceeds of the books to be turned over to Hogwarts from his vault. They think that is appropriate payment for his abuse of office."
"He is not going to be happy." Severus handed the paper over to Remus, "I'm going to warn Minerva."
"Are you going to the school?" Harry turned a concerned face to the potions master.
"No, I'll floo her." He explained.
"Good." Harry began to fill his plate and eat.
