Hello, this is a bit of a filler chapter, but never mind. It's sweet. And I'm only working up to killing off a major character. Review and I'll save them.

Thank you Timelord, Gray-Ember and Renaissance Book Lover! Hey you're back!

Do you mind if I come over? I need to get out of babyland for a bit. ~ Morgana xxx

Sure xxx, Gaius is at some conference so I have the place to myself. U OK? ~M

Tell u at yours ~Morgana

Merlin opened the door, frowning at the sight of Morgana. She looked awful. Her face was pale, her eyes red from crying. He kissed her gently, wrapping his arms around her and was startled to find her shivering.

"Hey, what's the matter?"

"I love you," she murmured in to his shoulder, trying not to cry. He laughed, kissing the top of her head.

"We've only been apart, what, three days? Hey come on, I love you too." He shut the door behind them, and steered Morgana in, sensing she was on the verge of meltdown.

"How's Morgause?" Morgana smiled.

"Oh it's great having her home again – doctors have told her she just needs to rest a lot, and there'll be quite a few home visits. Her and Ken are just spending as much time with Lizzie as they can before Ken flies off to Cape Town again. She sat down at the kitchen table, looking around. She was pretty sure that the house was late sixteenth century, or perhaps early seventeenth as she ducked her head to avoid the criss cross beams of the kitchen. The warm glow of the fireplace lit up the small room, and there were piles of books – some old, some brand new textbooks everywhere. The wooden floorboards were rough and uneven, and the whole house gave out the impression of home – to be ridiculously clichéd, it was cosy. Merlin put on the kettle, getting out a tin of cake.

"Gaius has started baking – he's not bad actually," Merlin chuckled, showing Morgana a picture on his phone of Gaius in a flowery apron and oven gloves. Morgana laughed, taking the phone and scrolling through his pictures. Most were of him and her, or Gwen or Arthur and the boys from school, but eventually she came across an older woman, shielding her face from the camera but smiling gently.

"Is that your mum?" Morgana asked timidly. Merlin nodded.

"Yes that's mum – she's called Hunith. She had me when she was seventeen, raised me all by herself. Works as a neo-natal nurse at the hospital back at home, but growing up we never had much. I'm worried about her though, the landlord's threatening to chuck her out and she won't have anywhere…" he broke off, smiling self consciously. "Sorry, I meant to ask about you, but I got…"

"No," Morgana placed a hand on his, her eyes meeting his. "Please tell me more – have you got any photos in this house?" The kettle whistled, and Merlin poured two cups of tea, cutting two generous slices of the cake.

"Ginger cardamom and earl grey – Gaius likes to experiment. Come up to my room, I'll show you some pictures." Morgana warily ascended the uneven wooden staircase, dodging past various ancient manuscripts until they reached the attic, Merlin's room." It was quite a large room, but much of it was uninhabitable, due to the sloping roof beams. There was a bed, a warm red rug and a portable heater, which as Merlin explained was useful seeing as there was no heating at all in the house. There were bookshelves all over the walls and on his desk, as well as a rickety old laptop Merlin had done countless paper rounds for. They sat on the rug together, their legs entwined and their heads touching, occasionally taking a sip of tea or a bite of cake as Merlin showed Morgana his photo album. Morgana smiled at the picture of a short woman with long black hair and wide blue eyes with a toddler on her hip, both grinning at the camera.

"Your ears were adorable." Merlin swatted at her and she grinned, taking the opportunity to kiss him. For a moment they were lost in each other, Merlin drinking up the scent of her hair as they broke apart, breathing gently, those smiles that couldn't keep off their faces playing on their lips. Morgana looked at the photo then.

"How old is your mum there?" Merlin checked the date.

"About nineteen." Wow. By the time Hunith was Morgana's age her son was nearly six years old. Merlin asked, tentatively,

"Do you have any family pictures?" Morgana hesitated for a moment, wondering if it was wise to do this so soon after her attack. Brushing the thought aside, she delved in her handbag, picking out two photographs. Merlin laid them gingerly on the floor. In one was a dark haired, bright eyed couple, playing with a toddler on the carpet. The toddler had a mop of dark ringlets and bright green eyes, and was grinning up at her parents.

"Is that your mum and dad?" Morgana nodded, looking at the photographs fondly. The other photograph was of her, Uther and Arthur. Uther's face was elongated with a beam, his green eyes alive and the skin around crinkled. Arthur was grinning too, his face splattered with mud and wearing a school football shirt that was obviously too big for him. He had his arm protectively around Morgana, who was rolling her eyes in her trademark manner, but was smiling too, perhaps a little reservedly, but it was genuine. Her leg was covered in a plaster cast, adorned with signatures, and there was a long jagged scar on her forehead.

"You look like Harry Potter," Merlin teased, and Morgana poked him playfully.

"This was taken about six months after I got out of hospital." Morgana murmured. Merlin's arms tightened around her and she snuggled in to his shirt. She wanted to talk to him about it, because she could talk about it now. Morgause kept talking about avoidance issues. She was past all that now, and she didn't need to go back on the anti-depressants. "Do you remember that massive rail crash, in 2001?" Merlin nodded.

"I remember my mum talking about it – Jesus Christ, were you in that?" Morgana nodded, a tired half smile on her face.

"It killed my parents. I watched them die. Their heads were bashed in and their limbs at funny angles and – no I'm sorry I can't." She balked, and Merlin stroked her hair.

"Hey, that's fine. You don't have to talk about it."

"I feel sick."

"Have some tea?" Merlin suggested, and Morgana accepted with a grateful smile.

"Anyway, that was the day my world turned upside down. I moved in with Arthur and Uther, started going to boarding school. That was when the nightmares started. I kept dreaming I was in the crash, and I knew it was going to happen, but I couldn't stop it and then it would happen again – sorry." She apologised.

"Don't, don't say sorry." Merlin insisted. "But what happened today?

"Morgause wanted me to talk about it. When I was younger and she was finishing her doctorate I would talk to her about my dreams and worries, and she would analyse them. She was the one who took me to Doctor Aglain and insisted that he diagnose me with PTSD. Even then Uther didn't like it. Kept saying that there was nothing wrong with me, I just needed to get outside more, or something. Anyway, today Morgause wanted to tell me about what – what it was like at home, with Uther. And I did start telling her, but then I panicked and started to have flashbacks. Eventually I passed out, gave Morgause a right fright." Merlin interrupted,

"What, you passed out? Are you all right – do you want to lie down." Morgana rolled her eyes.

"I'm fine, Merlin, honestly. I just – really wanted to be here." She smiled faintly. "You know, I'm really bringing down the mood." Merlin sat for a while, lost in thought.

"I always used to worry so much about my mum. She worked herself so hard for so little. I mean all the way through her twenties, she should have been out with friends and enjoying herself, but when she wasn't working she had to look after me. So I made a promise to myself that I would get her out of that flat and in to a posh house somewhere, as soon as I was making money. And I loved biology, so I thought I'd train as a doctor – and I loved my course, and my time at uni, and I was so happy."

"Why did you decide to become a teacher?" Morgana asked, curious.

"Because I worked out that as a specially qualified teacher I would earn more than a junior doctor." Merlin said flatly. Morgana squeezed his hand, her heart filled with compassion. And yet Merlin smiled to himself.

"But even though I wanted a job as a doctor so much, I love teaching, more than I could have hoped. And at the end of the year, I'm going to find a really nice place for her to live, and that's going to be – incredible." Morgana looked at him, love in her eyes.

"What did I do to deserve you?" Merlin looked at her incredulously. Deserve him? Deserve – she was Morgana Pendragon, men practically fell over their feet trying to ask her out – and she had chosen him. And she was funny, and brave, and kind and beautiful. In response he kissed her, cupping her face with his hand and pulling her closer. Morgana straddled his legs, kissing him so hard she thought she would bruise his mouth. As she unbuttoned his shirt, he broke off, asking her,

"Are you sure? You've had a rough time of it this afternoon." But Morgana nodded fervently.

"I need this, you, Merlin." He kissed her again, pulling her tshirt over her head.

They woke up in a tangle of sheets and Merlin's duvet, Merlin half off the bed with Morgana's head on his chest, her hair tickling his chin. He slowly opened one eye – and then promptly fell off the bed, taking Morgana with him.

"Ouch." Morgana complained, although Merlin didn't see why she was complaining, seeing as she landed quite comfortably on him. Still, he regarded her with a sheepish,

"Good morning." She laughed quietly.

"Good morning. Hey, happy Halloween." Merlin's eyes lit up like a little kid's and he kissed her good morning. Inevitably the kiss deepened, and his hands ran through her hair, getting in to a more comfortable position to kiss her in. She laughed against his lips.

"Someone's a little eager this morning." He put on his best puppy dog eyes and she sighed contendedly.

"Let's go downstairs. It's too cold up here. At least you have the stove in the kitchen."

"You want to do this in the kitchen?" Morgana smirked.

"Or in the living room, I'm not fussy – hey put me down!" Merlin scooped her up, sheet and all, and carried her down the stairs.

"You're too skinny," Merlin complained, but she merely shrugged.

"I eat enough."

"I blame vegetarianism. You don't eat nearly enough of the good stuff." Morgana cuffed him around the ears for that one, and he set her down at the bottom of the ladder. Immediately they began to kiss ravenously, and Morgana pulled the sheet around to enclose them both. Suddenly they heard a key scrape in the rusted lock, and Morgana's eyes widened.

"You said Gaius wouldn't be back until this evening!" Merlin ran his hands through his hair distractedly.

"That's what I thought – shit – okay, we can just go up and get dressed and I'll – um try to distract him whilst you escape."

"Escape? And anyway, I'm hungry."

"I know, and I'm sorry but Gaius is my Great Uncle and it would just be so incredibly awkward I think I would implode from embarrassment." Morgana tried to hide her smile.

"Okay then. They clambered up the ladder together and hastily got dressed, Merlin tugging on his jeans and falling flat on his face. Morgana bit her lip.

"I'm missing my bra, and my t-shirt."

"Shit I think we left them downstairs." Gaius's voice carried from downstairs.

"Merlin, are you up yet? You haven't been drinking again have you? I will not hesitate to show you Ernest's brain again."

"No! No seriously I'm coming down in just a sec!" Merlin's voice was high pitched as he threw one of his own Death Cab For Cutie t-shirts at Morgana and ran downstairs, still buttoning up his shirt." He scrambled down the ladder and came face to face with Gaius.

"Right – um, did you get some shreddies?" Every wrinkle in Gaius's face showed his disapproval as he held up Morgana's bra with a stick.

"I found this in the larder, Merlin." Merlin flushed tomato red, wishing that the floor would open up and swallow him whole. "I would expect this kind of behaviour from a student, possibly, but not from someone your age and certainly not from a teacher. Come on, who did you have over? Was it that Freya girl who keeps giving you cups of coffee in the staffroom? Well was it?

"It was me, Gaius," Morgana crept in to the room, Merlin's tshirt ridiculously big on her. "I'm sorry – we didn't actually realise," Gaius's surprise was quickly replaced by his embarrassment, and the room was silent for a while as every person wished themselves a thousand miles away. Finally Gaius spoke up in a gruff voice.

"I believe this belongs to you, Morgana."

"Thank you," she whispered, mortified. Finally deciding that she had to say something, she piped up,

"Do you want me to make breakfast?" Both men turned to her in surprise and relief.

"That would be lovely my dear, thank you," Gaius said, recovering his dignity and thus able to treat her normally again. "How is Morgause? I heard she came home yesterday."

"Oh fine, it's babyland back at my place, that's why I came here – porridge or a cooked breakfast? If it's cooked then it will have to be vegetarian."

"Porridge would be fine, Morgana, thank you. He eyed her curiously and she raised her head defiantly, self consciously fiddling with the bottom of Merlin's t-shirt.

"So how long has this been going on for?" Merlin looked at Morgana.

"Since Wednesday, I think."

"Technically Tuesday."

"Well yes, technically." Gaius mulled this information over, his left eyebrow performing some ancient dance as he thought.

"Well my dears, I would be careful. I don't think Uther would be too happy if he heard about this, his no dating policy is terribly strict."

"I like that! When his own son does all the beautiful teachers in the school!" Morgana said, outraged. She opened the fridge and scoured for milk, finding some oats in the larder. Merlin sat down at the table and watched her contentedly, whilst Gaius harrumphed for a while longer.

"So are you going to tell Uther?"

"God no." Merlin and Morgana said simultaneously, their eyes widening.

"Uther doesn't like me anyway, if he finds out I'm dating his foster daughter, he will serve my head on a silver platter with a dressing from my vena cava." Gaius nodded.

"For all his faults as a foster father he's very protective, has been since the accident," Morgana put in, "and I've never brought a boyfriend home for the simple reason that he would rip them to pieces."

"You're going to have to tell him some time, Morgana," Gaius chastised, gently. Morgana held her head high in the air.

"Well, we'll see when the time comes. Now, who wants sugar and who wants raspberries?"

The coffee shop Morgana chose was small, part bookshop. Its high walls were covered in books; a small man was polishing coffee cups behind a dusty counter. The coffee was served in chipped mugs, but it was good coffee, as Merlin commented, sipping his. Morgana tapped on the rim of her mug, biting elegantly in to a slice of chocolate cake.

"Mmm, this stuff is good," Morgana sighed, receiving a beam from the man behind the counter. "This is strange – it's a first date. But I know all about you all ready."

"Well, perhaps it's a good thing. Everything's gone so fast – even I'm not quite sure what happened. Gwen knows, Gaius knows, Arthur doesn't know and Uther definitely does not and will never know." Merlin crammed his face with flapjack, crumbs spraying as he said, "Fo swort food lunk ee sed do?"

"What?"

"What do you think we should do?" Morgana considered the question, setting her mug down on the table and rubbing the place where her glasses sat on the bridge of her nose.

"Well, the last time you asked that question I said we should go for coffee. And here we are, going for coffee. So now I don't know." She took a sip and winced as the hot liquid singed her tongue. "It's Halloween. Let's dress up with Arthur and Gwen and tell him with masks on. Perhaps it will be easier."

"Arthur and Gwen? Won't that be just the tiniest bit…I mean I thought Gwen broke up with him."

"This is Gwen we're talking about. She tried to break up with a guy and ended up telling him she was pregnant."

"Gwen was pregnant?"

"No – that's what I mean. It was excruciating. How do you think she's going to break up with the lovesick puppy that is my foster brother." Merlin grinned goofily.

"Just so I know…how do you do Halloween here? As in how geeky do we actually go."

"We have a Doctor Who marathon and make drunken brownies." Morgana deadpanned. Merlin sighed in relief.

"I'll call Arthur. Would I seem really weedy if I asked if I could borrow his sewing machine?"