Okay. First off; APOLOGIES. I am truly sorry for everyone who has been waiting for OVER A MONTH for this chapter! Between real life, Save Me, Blush, and fighting to try and get my passport back in time for New York, this story has kind of fallen by the wayside. But don't worry! I'll never forget it, and will strive to finish it if it's the last thing I do!
Second: APOLOGIES AGAIN! To all my friends headed to New York on the 20th; I wish like crazy I was going with you. But my passport will not be back in time. I will miss seeing the closing night performance of Darren in H2$, which I was so looking forward to! I am terribly dissappointed, but hope to be able to visit New York another time. Possibly in August, as a birthday present to myself! XD
Third: Anyone who has read Dalton by CP Coulter, will recognise the names of the schools in this chapter. I have no imagination; I just took names that happened to be already written. So a shout out to Mama CP for that!
Fourth: This is just a filler chapter. I've been fighing to decide where this is going, and this chapter seems to be a starting point. Hopefully, the characters will tell me what they want, and I won't be left scratching my head wondering what to do next! I don't own anything, so enjoy! XD
Blaine looked around the room at the women who converged on Kurt. He noticed Kurt smiling brightly at them, wondering what he had let himself in for. He slowly wandered to the coffee table, watching Kurt interacting with those around him.
"Hi!" A short, rotund, balding man offered his hand, shaking Blaine's hand limply as he turned to steal one of the donuts provided on the table. Blaine smiled politely, his attention more focused on Kurt than the man beside him.
"My name is Adrian," The short man continued, stuffing half the donut in his mouth at once. Blaine shuddered inwardly, still smiling but now looking for a way to escape this man without seeming overly desperate to get away.
"Blaine," he offered shortly, noting the man had donut crumbs left at the side of his mouth. He sighed softly as another couple of men appeared, introducing themselves as Chad and Jeff. Jeff followed his eyes, and caught him staring at Kurt. A smile broke out over the man's face, and he chuckled softly. The other three men looked at Jeff in concern.
"Kurt's been kind of a major influence here the past couple of weeks." Jeff explained. "I'm glad you could finally make it, Blaine." He reached his hand out and clasped Blaine's hand warmly, and Chad and Adrian each let out a small gasp. Chad's eyes immediately lit up in warmth and friendship, but Adrian's eyes turned sullen and brooding, as though he was experiencing something fairly unpleasant. He took his seat without speaking another word to any of the other men.
"What's up with him?" Blaine asked once Adrian had left the little group. Chad frowned, looking at the back of Adrian's head, shaking his head softly.
"I'm not sure if he's having an identity crisis or what, but it's like he's decided Kurt is the most gorgeous man in the world. He doesn't even pay as much attention to his wife as he does Kurt, and she runs the meetings!" He pointed to Camille, the tall willowy blond who was calling for everyone to now take their seats.
Blaine felt his blood pressure increase as his vision started to blur; this married man was attracted to his Kurt? How dare he? Blaine grasped Kurt's hand as he sat, possessively keeping himself between Kurt and Adrian. Kurt turned to Blaine with a small frown, taking in the jealous look to his eyes. He caught Blaine sneaking glances toward Adrian, and Kurt began to understand. He leaned in to Blaine's shoulder, whispering softly for only Blaine to hear.
"He doesn't matter, Blaine. He's not who I come home to every night. You are. And you always will be," Kurt's voice dropped an octave, and Blaine felt a satisfied shiver run up his spine as he smirked in Adrian's direction. Too bad the man wasn't watching him, he thought. Closing his eyes, he slipped his lips to Kurt's cheek, kissing down the jawline softly, before placing a chaste kiss against his husband's lips.
"You should be paying attention," Kurt admonished, before turning back to the front. A faint blush crept over his features, and Blaine smirked again to see it. He stole a glance at Adrian again, and caught the other man scowling fiercely at him. Oh. He had seen the kiss. Blaine was quite satisfied at that, even though it was petty. Kurt was Blaine's, and no short, balding man was going to take him away. He returned his attention to the front of the room, as Kurt was requested to come up and speak.
"Hi, everyone. My name is Kurt Hummel-Anderson, and I've been asked to speak today on the subject of raising gay teens. Having been one myself, and raising one as well, I think this hour should prove to be an interesting one," The small group laughed softly at the joke, and Kurt pulled his cue cards from his pocket. As he launched into his speech, Blaine noted that his husband seemed very at ease with this role, and made a mental note to look into other jobs or hobbies which would entail Kurt teaching. He seemed to truly enjoy being there.
The entire room was held transfixed as Kurt told his story; of being the only out gay kid at his high school, of the slushies and the swirlies and the dumpster tosses. He told of his best friends who, although they watched and were appropriately incensed, couldn't do anything about it because of the lack of intervention on the part of the teachers.
He told about what it felt like to be there, knowing no one could do anything about the bullying, about how alone and desperate it became. How at one point he had risked his life and challenged the bully who tormented him the most. How he had been kissed without his consent, had been threatened, and had spent the entire last year at the high school so stressed out that he lost thirty pounds. When he finally graduated, he had been an unbelievably dangerous hundred and eight pounds. How when he had finally confessed what had been happening, once it was all over, the doctor had shook his head and asked how he was still alive, as the average weight for Kurt's height was a hundred and sixty pounds.
Then he told about his daughter, who was coming to grips with being gay herself. He explained about the frustrations he had, of not being able to provide her with many of the answers she was looking for. For, no matter that he had gone through it all himself, it was her life and her decisions would affect whether she had the same types of experiences that he had.
Toward the end, he wrapped it up by saying that each person was individual, and no matter how much each parent tried to see things from their child's perspective, it was ultimately up to them to make the decisions they would, and as parents all they could do was gently guide their children to make the best decisions they could.
Following the resultant clapping, he opened the floor up to the questions that inevitably came with any type of instruction. Adrian had his hand up first, and Kurt asked him to share his question with everyone.
"So, if I have a gay kid, I shouldn't push him to come out because it's ultimately bad, right?" Adrian asked, his eyes following Kurt's every move as he quirked his eyebrow at the shorter man.
"Are you telling me you and Camille have a gay son?" Kurt asked quietly, and Camille frowned.
"No! No, I'm just asking… for those who may have a gay child," Adrian's face flushed, leaving him blotchy and running his hand through his short hair.
"It's not bad for a child to come out, but it has to be on their own time," Blaine cut in, attracting the attention of many in the room. "If you force someone out, it can seriously damage their self-esteem, their courage, and their life. I've seen outed people commit suicide because they haven't come to grips with it themselves." A gasp ran through the crowd, as that simple statement tugged at collective heartstrings.
Kurt walked over to his husband, placing his hand on Blaine's shoulder, lending comfort and imparting love.
"That's why we don't condone outing someone. Self-esteem is very important, and that's not just for teenagers. It's for any age; I don't believe in outing anyone, regardless of what they've done in their lives. If someone wants to remain closeted, then that's their choice, no one else's. You can't take something like that away from someone. Not ever." Kurt watched as Adrian sat back down, his eyes never leaving Kurt's face.
Kurt continued fielding questions, only stopping when someone pointed out that most of the teens they were discussing would be home within a matter of minutes. Kurt was thanked profusely, and he and Blaine stuck around for a bit longer to speak with Jeff and Camille.
"That went well, I think," Kurt murmured to Blaine, as he smiled a goodbye to one of the more emphatic women. "If we managed to get Adrian to learn something, I think it went quite well indeed." Blaine sighed softly, wrapping his arm around his husband's waist, pulling him into a loving hug.
"I don't know what it is about him, Love. I don't like the way he looks at you." Blaine murmured back, feeling Kurt rub his lower back soothingly.
"I know, sweetie. I'm sorry but I can't help feeling like he might be, you know, like us…" Kurt replied, breaking off as Camille and Jeff wandered up to them.
"Thank you so much, Kurt." Jeff smiled, his eyes darting down to where Blaine's arm was wrapped around Kurt's waist and back up to Blaine's face. "I'm so glad you managed to see your husband in action, Blaine. He was one of the better speakers we've had. Clear, concise, giving as few personal details as possible without losing the overall effectiveness of the message. I think we'll have to have you back again soon," he finished, reaching out to shake Kurt's hand in farewell.
"I agree. You were great up there, Kurt," Camille was a bit more reserved, but still smiled at the two men before her. "I can't wait to see you in action again. Have a good night!" She called, as she headed out to the parking lot. Jeff walked with the two men, locking the door to the hall behind him as they went.
"Until next week, then Kurt?" Jeff asked, and Kurt smiled back softly.
"I'll be there."
"What did you think?" Kurt asked softly as they drove home. It was raining now, drizzling as they made their way. The swish of the wipers on the windshield was the only sound for a few moments, before Blaine stole a glance at Kurt, returning his eyes to the road just as quickly.
"You were incredible up there, Kurt. Like you were born for it." Kurt blushed as he looked out the passenger window, his smile lighting up his entire face as he recalled the proceedings.
"I felt like I was back in my old debate class. Or in Glee Club. I always did love the thrill of getting up in front of others and showing them what I could do." He sighed softly. "I wish I could do that sort of thing more often." Blaine stole another glance at Kurt, making out the wistful look on his lover's face. He made a mental note to check in to things Kurt could do: possibly a drama class, or a motivational speaking course.
When the men got home, they found Jessica sitting on the front porch, her bag slung onto the floorboards beside her, watching the rain come down. Blaine decided to go inside, and allow Kurt a moment to commune with their daughter. Kurt sat on the swing beside Jess, his arm automatically going around her shoulders as she leaned into his embrace. Suddenly she turned her head to his chest and began to cry softly.
"Jess?" Kurt whispered, his voice barely audible above the patter of the rain all around them. "Tell me what's wrong?" Jessica's normally blue eyes were a deep bluish-grey as she looked up into his own. His heart nearly stopped as he realised just how beautiful she truly was. He leaned forward and kissed her forehead softly.
"Marisa wouldn't talk to me at all today. None of my friends would. I just sat there at lunch, by myself, not talking to anyone or doing anything differently than I normally would. Then a boy walked by. A nice boy, or so I thought. He'd always been nice to me. His name was Josh. Josh Sanders. He… called me a name." Her tears began flowing again as she stammered, trying to get the offensive term out.
"He called me a…. clitty-licker." Kurt's heart broke in two and his blood began to boil at the same time. His daughter, one of the most beautiful, amazing people he knew, was being called such a derogatory name from some asshole who didn't even know her! And Kurt made a decision right then and there: no one was going to get away with this, especially not a scumbag like that! He held his daughter tight while she cried, the rain all around making him want to weep too.
"Jess?" Kurt asked softly, when her tears had abated just a bit. "Would… would you like to check out a private school? Somewhere safe, where you wouldn't be bullied like that anymore?" Jessica's breath hitched, a soft sob sounding from her throat, and he detected a soft nod from her, as she crushed her face back into his chest.
After dinner, once the girls were in bed, Kurt opened his laptop. He pulled up the best schools in the country, coming up with a number of schools that had zero tolerance bullying policies. There were a number of them across the country that had been set up specifically to promote a safe learning environment. There were also a lot of websites that dealt with bullying, how to prevent and contain it, and how to get those involved working together rather than against each other. He found a lot of information about bullying on a website called BullyFreeWorld dot com. It gave a lot of information, and Kurt bookmarked it for future reference.
Once he had chosen the top three schools he could find, he printed out information on each of them.
Hanover Preparatory School in Los Angeles catered to the rich and famous of Hollywood. A lot of child actors went there, and although Jessica hadn't shown any ambitions of becoming an actress, she wouldn't stick out as they had many different types of people there.
Windsor House was located in North Eastern Massachusetts, along a well-travelled highway just outside of Lowell. It was fairly secluded, but the teacher to student ratio was six to one, which made it easier for the teachers to identify and stop any type of bullying.
Stuart Academy, situated in the heart of downtown Houston, Texas, featured an amazing music program, and boasted a stable full of horses that he knew Jessica would love to get to know. They taught equestrian lessons as well as the regular academics.
He placed the information in a series of folders, and set them to the side. He would keep Jess home from school tomorrow, and they would go over each of the schools together with Blaine, and make their decision then. Kurt ran a weary hand over his face; he wished the world were different. He wished his daughter could fit in with her peers without feeling like an outsider. Not that he would change her; never that. But he did wish he could change the world and make it a bit more accepting to the way things were. He wished she didn't have to go through everything he had gone through. He wished she didn't feel quite so alone. Kurt headed up to bed with all of these things swirling around restlessly in his head.
The next morning, after Katherine and Penny went off to school, he sat Jessica down at the kitchen table, and called Blaine into the kitchen to join them. They all sat there, and marvelled over the schools that Kurt had located. Jessica remained slightly subdued, however, as she picked up pictures from each school, denoting how lovely they each were.
"Dad, Daddy, I'm not sure if I should…" Jessica trailed off, her face studying the picture she was holding intently. Blaine looked at Kurt, his eyebrow raised in query. Kurt simply shrugged, and leaned closer to his daughter.
"Not sure if you should what, Jess?" Blaine asked hesitantly, seeing his daughter raise her blue eyes to his.
"I'm not sure if I should go to another school. Dad, didn't you say before that you hated running away? Even though you were happy at that other school, you said you regretted being chased away from your friends, right?" Blaine nodded in agreement, sitting back and watching the emotions play over Jessica's face.
"That's true, Jessica. I did regret it. I still do. But I don't regret the friends I made at Dalton. Nor do I regret the fact that I remained safe until the day I graduated." Jessica pounced on what was being left unsaid like a cat on a mouse.
"But once you graduated you figured out the world was different, didn't you, Dad? I mean, you weren't bullied for being gay, just small, but the world still didn't accept you for who you were, did they?" Blaine crimsoned, recalling his first few days at his first job after graduation. He still felt a pang of embarrassment as he remembered being interviewed and rejected due to his short stature.
"You're right, Jess. The world didn't accept me right away. I had to prove myself, over and over again, until I made them take notice of me. But it was hard. I didn't get a free pass just because I went to Dalton. It was nice to have the contacts, but it didn't mean I didn't have to claw my way up from the ground floor to get to where I am now." Jessica nodded as her father's words confirmed her own fears.
"But you should know, Jess. I went through staying where I was, being bullied, and I discovered how hard it can be," Kurt's voice cut in, and both Blaine and Jessica turned to look at him. "I lost weight, I looked half dead all the time, I stopped eating, and came dangerously close to losing my life a couple of times. I was stressed out because of the bullying, and I never want you to have to worry about that sort of thing." Kurt's voice trembled as his emotions surged to the surface, roiling dangerously as he fought to suppress them. Jessica placed her hand on Kurt's, imparting strength and courage, allowing him a moment to gather his emotions back into his control.
"I understand that, Daddy. I really do. But I'm not like you. I'm not as strong, or courageous, or smart as you. What if I don't fit in at a different school? What if I never find a place that I can belong?" Jess hung her head, her silence betraying her shaken self-confidence better than anything words ever could.
"Maybe… maybe I should stay where I am, for now." Kurt looked over at Blaine, who watched his daughter with tears standing in his eyes. "I can find out if I still have any friends at school. I can try to make new ones if the old ones won't have me. If I can't figure this all out in a month, then I will ask to be transferred. I won't stay some place I'm not wanted, but I don't want to run away, either." The swell of emotion Kurt knew Blaine shared was a combination of love and pride. Their daughter was so much more than she believed herself to be. And this was the proof, right here.
"Sweetheart. If you think you can stand to stay in that school for the next month, then that's your choice." Blaine's voice was choked, and Jessica looked up, seeing the tears as one slowly rolled down Blaine's cheek. "But if it ever gets to be too much, if anyone hurts you so much that you can't stand it, you come to one or both of us, all right? We will help you. You never, ever, have to do this alone. Do you understand me?" Blaine wrapped his arms around his daughter, holding her close as she began to cry again, as his own tears slipped silently down his cheeks.
Kurt slid from his own chair, kneeling in front of the two seated before him. He reached up and twined one of his hands with Blaine's, and the other with Jessica. And they sat there, simply taking comfort in each others' presence.
Nick Cardwell answered his phone on the second ring, reading the caller ID on the screen before answering.
"Hey, if it isn't one of my favourite nieces! How's Jessica doing this glorious fall day?" Nick blinked a couple of times, then stuck his finger in his eye, trying to rub the sleep from them. He rolled over, kissing his wife gently as she stirred, and then retreated to the bathroom. It was Saturday, and he had planned to get together with a few of his friends for some guy bonding time.
"Uncle, Nick, can I talk to you?" Nick frowned; Jessica was usually much more responsive to his enthusiastic hellos. He started to become slightly worried.
"Of course, Jessica. Is everything all right? Do you need me to pick you up somewhere?" Nick had a sudden vision of Jessica stuck somewhere with no way to get home, and clutched the phone closer to his ear. "Talk to me, sweetie. Are you okay?"
"I'm fine, Uncle Nick… I just… need to talk to someone who isn't family right now. Can you come get me?" Nick took a breath. He advised her it would take him a couple of hours to get everything ready, but he'd be there. Did she want to come stay the weekend with him?
"Yes, please? I'd love to see Aunt Caroline and Mandy, if you don't think I would be imposing." Nick assured her she could never impose on them, and after promising her that he wouldn't tell anyone but Caroline and Mandy that she was coming, he hung up.
"Mmmm," Caroline hummed as Nick placed a soft kiss to her temple, opening one eye sleepily as she focussed her gaze on her husband. "Nick? Who was that?"
"It was Jessica, Love." Caroline's eyes popped open, and she sat up in bed.
"Is she all right? She doesn't usually call you for no reason… Normally if she wants to talk she calls Wes or David. Is everything okay?" Caroline's panic momentarily set off his own, and he felt his heart rate speed up in accordance.
"She says she's fine. Just needs to talk to someone who isn't family. I guess she means close family," Nick sighed. "I promised to go pick her up. Do you mind if she stays here for the night? I'll bring her back home tomorrow. She and Mandy can have a movie night," Caroline sighed softly as well, and wrapped her arms around Nick's shoulders.
"Of course she can stay the night. She can stay as long as she wants. Now if it were Katie or Penny, I'd say just one night. But I've never had any problems with Jess. She's always been the perfect child. And luckily for us, she passed some of that on to Mandy," Caroline smiled softly, thinking about her six year old daughter, currently sleeping away in her bedroom.
"If you hurry, Nick, you can get back before lunch, and we can all go out together. How's that sound?" Nick laughed softly, trying not to wake his daughter.
"That sounds delightful, Love. Mmmm," He kissed Caroline soundly on the lips, caressing her shoulder before easing her gently back onto the bed. "You go back to sleep for a bit; I'll call the helicopter crew and see if they'll rouse this early for an extra couple thousand. Being rich does have its perks…" Caroline giggled as he pressed a gentle kiss against her throat, and then left.
Well. Lookit that. I think I know where I want to go with this now. Oh, and before you ask, yes "Nick" is the Warbler who hangs out with Jeff all the time, and is played by Curt Mega. I couldn't for the life of me figure out if "Nick" had a last name, so I picked one randomly out of the phone book. Yes, I do get very random sometimes! XD
