Ok so that last one was kinda fun-- once I got around to finishing it! eh
heh, sorry that this one is so long. I swear I went over it at least six
times and Im still not happy with it! Woo hoo! Only about one week late and
thats cuz I don't have access to spell check so I had to wait till school
started again. Gomen-nasi, Oh and to all my faithful reviewers cookies and
candy by the truckload, I luv u guys!!! [Watch everybody run for the exits]
ENJOY!!
Disclaimer: Too busy to writ up a cute dialogue so this is it. I own nothing! No plushies, no pictures, no manga, no anime. So HA! You cant sue!......... somehow that doesn't cheer me up as much as I thought it would... ************************************************************************ DARKNESS
Air bubbles were rising to the top of the tub, as the seconds ticked by they came slower and smaller until they stopped coming. The static surrounding Kagome was thicker than ever and the blue blurs she saw were slowly being blotted out by the darkness creeping into the edges of her already foggy vision. The darkness slowly covered all the blue and when it did she passed out...
~*~*~ START DREAM SEQUENCE
In her mind she saw nothing but darkness, soft, welcoming darkness. It surrounded her like a mothers arms, soft with a sense of security you can find nowhere else. Kagome was happily basking in the darkness when it was disturbed by a faint, glowing green light a few meters away.
It steadily grew stronger until it suddenly flared a green so bright it shone white that it was painfull and blinded her. As suddenly as it had appeared it just as quickly, disappeared. In its place was a beautiful woman; she had dark-ebony hair down past her knees almost to her ankles, rich, creamy white skin and the most amazingly warm, emerald-green eyes... Those eyes continued to glow softly with the same, soft green light, but this time it was warm and welcoming, not harsh.
In Kagome's sight all she saw was a colored fuzzy blob of a person, but that tiny green light that was the woman's eyes, glowing faintly, was strong enough to slowly wake her from the static surrounding her mind. The fog distorted shape stood a few meters from her in the darkness but that light still managed to warm her, pushing the numbing cold further down and away.
"Kagome, you have to wake up. From this dream and from the depression you have been in. You MUST wake up!"
The womans voice was warm and whispery with a faint echo as the static fought to keep its grip on Kagome, her voice chased away some more of the cold that had been surrounding her.
"There is more at stake here than you know, it is a big burden to have the task you were given but I promise that everything will be all right in the end."
'WHAT task?' Confused more than ever Kagome just listened to the woman and the voice that was slowly dissipating the static surrounding her.
"You have responsibilities, you cannot abandon them or the people that need you." The strange lady told her, while steadily walking closer. "What people? Nobody cares about me, they all left me. Alone." Kagome slurringly [A/N: think I just made up another word there] told the vision.
"Your wrong, they do care. But your family is not psychic, how were they supposed to know that you would be coming two weeks in advance? Besides they only went because your aunt got in a accident and they went to comfort and help the others. Are you really so hurt that you would resent that your mother console her only sister and her family?" she scolded Kagome gently.
Still too deep into the numbness Kagome didn't fully absorb what she was being told. Stubbornly she shook her head, "Their better off without me, all of them..." she stated weakly.
"No, they aren't." The woman told her kindly, "In fact they would be lost without you. Here let me show you."
She was standing in front of Kagome by then, she regally kneeled down to the girls level and gently took her chin in her grip to turn her so that they were looking into each other's eyes.
Those eyes, those emerald green eyes pulled Kagome in like a sirens call. The fog obscuring her vision cleared enough so that she was able to see those eyes perfectly. Strangely, those eyes were the clearest thing she had seen since she had crawled out of the well...
^*^*^*^*^*^ WHAT KAGOME SEES IN THE WOMANS EYES ^*^*^*^*^*^*
Kagome saw was a strong green light that were the womans eyes and then reality melted away, what was left of it, along with what was left of the static and fog surrounding her. When she was able to finally move away Kagome looked around and found that they were in her brothers room. All his things were as she had last seen them except that this time everything was coated in a thick blanket of dust.
Startled to find herself in her brothers room Kagome slowly made her way around it to see what had changed during her hurried visits to her own time. She was faintly surprised to find that all his child-toys were gone and in their place were teenage-boy things.
'He would be 13 or 14...' she let a small smile grace her lips at the memory of his outrage when the school told him that they would have to hold him back a year because his birthday was a month too late for admission into school. The smile grew as she remembered two years back when he was allowed to skip a grade because of his excellent scores.
She found various pictures of their family as she wandered aroundaimlessly only to stop short when she noticed that a whole shelf was dedicated to a young girl a year or two older than her brother. There were picture-booth pictures, some of them playing, holding hands, posing for the camera and it ranged from there.
So her brother had definitely grown up since the last time she had checked, she mentally beat herself up at that. How could she have missed out on something so big as to her brother having a girlfriend?
"Why did you bring me here and why is his room like this, like it hasn't been occupied for a long time?" Kagome turned to ask the woman who all that time had been leaning against the window by the bed. "Where's my brother?" She asked as her eyes fell on a more recent picture of Souta, it was a close-up that showed his face clearly.
His once porcelin smooth face was lined and had lost the roundness and innocent look of a child, he looked a bit worn and weighed down, making him look years older than what she knew him to be. "He looks so much older! What happened to put that look on his face, in his eyes?"
The woman heaved a heavy sigh and pushed herself from the window, she walked over to Kagome and led her to the bed so she could sit, the picture still in her hands. By then her silence was unnerving Kagome, "What's going on?!" ""Let me explain... After you died your mother went into a deep kind of grieving, your brother was still young-- he has always been a good soul. Unfortunately however good his heart is it was also rather fragile... he was not strong enough to bear your death AND your mothers pain. Believe it or not, he was always looking after you. He was very protective of you despite his being younger... he began to blame himself when they found your body in the bathroom..."
'No! Why would he blame himself? It had nothing to do with him...' "He loved you a great deal, without you he felt lost and alone. He was starving for some kind of human contact, it was no surprise when he turned to his girlfriend--- and got her pregnant." Shock ran through Kagome like ice down her spine, "But why would he do that? What about mom and grandpa and his friends?"
"He pushed his friends away and your family was mourning YOU, he didn't want to bother them-- especially your mother. They were all wrecks." Was the woman's soft answer, "But then where is he, with his wife or..." Kagome let her question trail of at the thought that her brother was alone and maybe even homeless.
"No, they were living here but they were all running low on money. What with your mother not working since she felt too sick to go in, so he was working three jobs to try and keep, not only him and the girl clothed and fed, but your mother as well. It wasn't enough, all it did was wear him down. One day he went and tried to rob a store but the owner was having none of it and shot him in self-defense. However desperate, your brother was no killer. The gun he used wasn't loaded, he thought to scare the owner into giving him the money-- that way no one would be hurt. He was dead before the police got there."
"You can only imagine the pain that your family felt, the girl lost the child in her shock and unfortunately she also lost her life on the way to the hospital..."
Kagome was shaking so bad that the picture fell from her hands onto the floor, the glass shattered on impact. Grasping her hands firmly to stop the shaking Kagome slowly turned to look down at the shattered picture. 'No! Souta... No! I was just, I was just trying to make the pain go away. I- -I just needed to get away for a bit. I never meant to hurt anybody...' "Be that as it may, your death caused irreparable consequences on your family." Came the uncanny reply, it seemed she could hear her thoughts as easily as her spoken words.
Kagome's chest tightened at the thought of her brothers death, 'It was MY fault, if I had been here more often...' "Or better yet if you hadn't given up and let your pain overwhelm you, you could have been there to stop it from happening at all." The woman chided her gently.
Startled by the woman's voice as much as her words Kagome turned to look at her and found those eyes locked on hers. Once again she had that strange feeling of reality fading away around her, once she found that she could break her gaze away from those unnervingly warm eyes she found herself in a dark room. But this time it was not the absolute darkness she had been in before, this room felt-- neglected, for lack of a better word.
As her eyes adjusted Kagome realized that she wasn't alone, there were two other people in the room with her. One was that woman with the brilliant green eyes at her back; the other was... her mother. 'Mom? What is she doing here?' As her eyes slowly adjusted to the light she saw what she had missed before, the room was not only dusty and neglected-- it was a mess... and so was her mother.
The older woman lay in a dirty, smelly heap in a unmade and disgustingly dirty bed. There were odd things strewn everywhere, from papers to old take-out containers to empty liquor bottles. Now that Kagome saw the bottles (there were quiet a few) the reek of stale liquor, old food and unwashed human entered her nose with a vengeance.
"She couldn't take the loss of another family member, she struggled to stay strong for Souta but it was too much for her. When she found out about his mistake and his death she... She started to drink more and more and soon found herself in a depression so deep it was self-destructive. This is the result, she now hardly leaves that bed except to use the bathroom and sometimes not even that..." the woman told her matter-of- factly.
Horrified at what she was seeing Kagome stepped toward her mother and shakily sat at the edge of the bed bedsides her. She slowly made herself take a closer look at her and almost cried out at what she saw.
Her mothers once beautiful face was slack and deathly pale. She was amazingly thin, almost cadaverous. Her eyes were long dead and her skin looked waxen, almost as if she had long since left this world and was just barley hanging on to life. This wasn't her mother this was just a husk of her former self.
From her perch at her bedside Kagome was able to fully appreciate the reek that clung to her mother. Not able to look into her many-lined face any more Kagome closed her eyes and turned away, 'I put that look in her eyes and face. I put those lines there...' To prevent her thoughts from consuming her she opened her eyes.
"What, what about my Jii-chan? What happened to him?" she whispered terrified of the answer but she had to know. The woman sighed heavily, "He's dead child, the shock of your death was too much for him. It was quick-- a heart attack. For someone his age it wasn't that bad a way to die... at least he didn't suffer like the others." She finished quietly.
Slowly she looked at the woman by the door, those eyes caught her gaze once more and felt a gut-turning jerk as she was hurled out of reality. When she could once again look away she found herself in feudal Japan inside the once familiar village. Kaede's village. It was now nothing more than a barren looking field, clearly an old battle ground cuz as they made their way across it Kagome tripped over an old piece of armor, looking around more closely she noticed that the ground was laden with armor and old bones.
"What happened" she asked dully while dreading the answer, her hands were shaking uncontrolably now as she tried her best to keep it together. "They were attacked by demons, they held up well but they could not win..." the woman trailed off. 'All those innocent people... they were my friends! This is worse than the pain I felt before, all my family, gone. Wait...' Kagome's train of thoughts were cut off at the hope bubbling up inside her.
"What about the others, their still alive right?" she asked the woman eagerly. Her response was the woman's piercing eyes capturing her again, when she gained control once more they were in another part of feudal Japan...
They were standing at the edge of a huge crater; it was so big that the village could have fit into it easily.
"What happened here, why did you bring me here?" Her nerves were already stretched past their limit and the woman's mysteriousness did nothing to help. "This is Miroku's grave." Was all the answer Kagome got. 'Kami help him...' the crater was ten times bigger than the one his father had left behind!
In her grief Kagome failed to realize that with Naraku dead her friend's wind-tunnel would have healed instead of getting worse! U.U*
'Poor Sango...' "Her grave is here too," the woman stated, her eyes never leaving the crater. Shock ran through Kagome like a electrical jolt. She stood frozen while her companion explained, "she jumped in with the monk, refusing to leave him. They died in each others arms."
"B-but-but what- what about... Kohaku. Did Sango leave him after everything that's happened?" Her lips tingled after she spoke as the shock ran through and out her body lazily. "Kohaku never made it, he went mad at the memories of what he had done. Sango had been trying her hardest to save him but he was too much for her. He overpowered her and killed Kirara, he would have killed her too except that Miroku was there to help..."
The rest of Kagome started to shake at the matter-of-fact words coming from that woman, "He managed to damage Miroku's hand some more before Sango killed her own brother." The softly spoken words did little to help; wrapping her arms around herself Kagome found that she couldn't look away from the crater, a memorial to her friends and family. "Did they live a good life after-- before Miroku..." shaking so horribly that her legs couldn't support her anymore Kagome's words trailed off and she dropped to the ground on her knees.
"They were happy for about a year, they both knew that Miroku's time was limited, they just didn't know how limited... they were starting a family when Miroku felt the hole in his hand growing rapidly. Sango was pregnant, approximatly 3 weeks from giving birth when it happened." That dumped cold water over her spirit.
Kagome felt her eyes grow big and the trembling stop at that bit of news, she stared sightlessly from the edge of the crater at their memorial and started to rock back and forth slightly. 'She-- she was, pregnant...' Realization at the true tragedy of the situation had Kagome reeling. Looking up she found the woman's eyes once more and the scenery warped and shifted again.
This time they found themselves in a clearing, in the center instead of the hard-packed clay was a large, molten, glassy-looking clay. "What's this?" was all she could bring herself to say. As the combined sensation of the warp and Sango's sacrifice caused the nausea to win as she threw-up all over the ground. It hurt, since she had nothing in her stomach to throw-up all that came was bile and spit, her stomach cramping painfully.
"This is Inuyasha. You see after you left Kikyo dragged him into hell with her. Since he HAD promised -stubborn boy- and his only other responsibility and reason for living was gone-- he let her do as she wished. Hoping that maybe he would be able to land in the watching chambers of hell where would be able to watch you for all eternity at least." [A/N: that's somewhere where your forced to watch all your loved ones live a happy life while your stuck in the dark, alone, unable to interact, eat or sleep. It greek mythology--I think, Instead of going to the Elysian Fields. Obviously Im too lazy to look it up and find the actual name for it.]
"Unfortunately, since Kikyo was already dead she could not die again. The earth spit her back out... enraged at this she lost what little heart she had left and turned into a new evil. Leading army's of demons on innocents and taking souls just so she could feel SOMETHING. Eventually she turned into a kind of succubus, absorbing emotions out of people along with their souls..."
Something in the woman's voice had changed, it was still matter-of- fact but there was a undertone to it.
A burning sensation pricked the back of her throat and the back of her eyes as she absorbed everything, "And, and Shippo" she asked meekly. Hoping that at least HE was still alive.
The woman looked stiffly up at the air above the crater, "Do you really want to know?" in all the time they had talked she had NEVER been cold. Matter-of-fact yes but always soft-spoken. The coldness from her voice could give frostbite and made Kagome shiver in spite of herself.
A lone tear made its way down Kagome's cheek slowly, her hopes dashed. "No," she breathed shakily. Once more Kagome looked into those strangely bright green eyes, this time willingly letting the power take her where it willed. When the ride was over she looked around and saw that she was once more surrounded by darkness and the woman was kneeling in front of her.
On the ground Kagome continued to look into her eyes and found that they were just-- eyes. Strangely glowing eyes but still-- just, eyes. Shaking herself mentally Kagome backed away from the strange apparition in front of her and found that the previously black, white and green blob in front of her was clearer now.
Thinking back on it during the little trip they had just taken not once did she catch anything more than the scenes she had been shown and those eyes.
What she had seen... the barrier in her head suddenly shattered like broken glass. It had been creeping up on her as soon as she had returned, but the memories she had of the visions in the woman's eyes were enough to break its hold on her completely. She was already on her knees in a place where she had no floor to support her except darkness. The scenarios the woman had showed her cut her deeply enough that the pain overwhelmed her. It was like a physical pain, she clutched her stomach and rocked back and forth as she let the pain ride her.
She had let out a scream of agony so great that even the woman felt her agony in her soul. She cried deep raking sobs that made raked deep tremors from her slight frame. The woman crouched before her laid a hand on her shoulder; it was like ice in a scorching atmosphere of pain, it caused her to look up and into her face. This time those eyes didn't be-spell her and she was able to get a true look at her face.
That face. Something about that face...
"Let it out child, let it out. You must purge yourself of this pain; you must let it wash over you and then float away like a wave. Otherwise it will consume you..." Kagome didn't know how long she just sat there and finally cried the loss of the heartbroken.
She was different; she didn't have it in her to hate them just for their happiness, just like she couldn't leave a person stranded even when she was inadequate help. She just didn't have that in her and that was what made her different. Despite everything her heart was too pure to for true hate. Thats why all that pain, anger, hurt, and bitterness was purged from her body by her tears.
When her cries finally slowed she found herself practically in the strange woman's lap, just like a mother she ran her hand soothingly up, down and in circles on Kagome's back. Every now and then she made cooing noises that soothes her like a cup of steaming homemade cocoa on a cold winters night. It was enough to break the spell that had washed over her since she had learned of her lovers betrayl.
"Do you see now? Do you see that your death will solve nothing; in fact it will only worsen things. Even without having been shown those images how could you think of abandoning your family like that? You have to let this go-- for their sake and yours. Everything will work itself out, for better or for worse. Trust in yourself, and don't let some boy rule you. You are far stronger than that! You were made to be stronger than that..."
The woman's words rang a bell deep in Kagome's soul but for the life if her she couldn't filter out what it meant. Ignoring it she concentrated on her fears, she didn't want harm to fall on anybody that was why she had left in the first place...
"I left so that I wouldn't hurt anybody and so that the pain would go away..." the tears flowed freely down her cheeks at the pain that surfaced in her heart.
"Don't you see child? The pain that your running from is what keeps you apart from the dead, pain is the body's way to telling us that we are still alive. You saw your mother-- however much she was still breathing-- she was nothing but a shell. I showed you those things for a reason!" The woman slowly came into focus as Kagome's tear-dilled eyes drained away.
"Are you willing to inflict all that pain on your family? They already lost your father, would you really put them through that again? Just because you feel bad? They need you, all of them do. The ones from your own time AND those in Feudal Japan. Whether you believe it or not you are the piece that holds everything together, YOU are what makes you family work so well."
The woman reached a lily-soft hand to cup Kagome's cheek, immediately the pain in confusion in her faded and she was able to see things slightly clearer in her minds eye.
"Even your friends would feel your loss, does that kind boy not always bring you gifts and such. And do they all not ask how you are faring? They always try to help, even when their help is not the right kind. Their hearts are in the right place, is yours? Can you really leave everybody alone like that?"
"What about Inuyasha? He left me, because I wasn't enough. He didn't love me.." the thought made her sick and weak all over again. The static tried to fight the light that emanated from the woman but she firmly pushed it back. She needed to know.
"And since when does a guy matter so much? Are you that much of a pushover that a few pretty words and some gifts from him will tame you? Are you so weak that a little heart-ache and doubt will break you?" The woman's words made their way through the doubt in Kagome's mind. 'I am NOT a push over!' she snapped out of her thoughts and doubt and looked into the woman's eyes. 'She's right; Iv NEVER let Inuyasha walk all over me, why should I start now? ...'
"But, Kikyo.." doubt crept into Kagome's heart again. "Forget Kikyo! She doesn't matter. She does not fit into the picture; she has a separate path to follow! ... We have let things get out of hand and that is our mistake to fix. Not yours. Do not worry, everything will work itself out..." worried that she was losing Kagome the woman reached out and grabbed her on either side of her face and willed her too see...
Flashes of what the woman had previously showed her passed though her minds eye like wildfire as she was forced to look into the womans eyes again, all that pain and suffering was caused by HER. No, she couldn't let that happen...
'Enough, enough...' "ENOUGH!" Kagome jerked out of the strange woman's grasp and lay sprawled on the floor crying. 'They all died! Bbut before they passed away they suffered so much. I-- I should have been there to help them. I'm so selfish!!! "Damn, damn, damn!" with each word she pounded her fist on the 'ground' in emphasis.
"Why did you show me that? WHY?!" desperate Kagome lunged herself at the woman in anger only to collapse crying into her lap again. "Child I showed you those things so that you would see that your are definitely needed and ARE appreciated. You have made so many changes in their lives just by being there. You have helped every life that you have touched, just by being you...Your heart is the biggest I have seen in a long time, it shines even in the darkness." Confused Kagome took her words literally and looked down at her chest, what she saw made her gasp.
In her chest a faint purple light was glowing VERY faintly, as she looked at it, the light steadily grew stronger until she was bathed in her own light just like the strange woman when she had first appeared. Confused Kagome looked around and realized that she was dreaming, she tried to wake up but found that she couldn't. 'What?! Dreams don't work like this. One you realize that its a dream you wake up, What going on?!'
"You see? If you were not as strong as you are I would not have been able to come to you..." The light surrounding Kagome steadily pushed the darkness back, raising all sorts of questions in her mind. 'Why do I glow like that woman?' The thought caused Kagome to look more closely at her and she gasped.
'Something about her is familiar, something about that face...'
"Child, you are needed in this time and the past. You have accomplished a great deal, do not throw it away. You still have things to accomplish. Remember! You MUST must remember the...! YOU ARE NEED! In more ways than one..." the woman's voice was fasing but Kagome noticed the faint tinge of panic to it.
Her words frightened her and found rando questions tumbling out of her mouth in her panick. "Who are you!? What's going on here, why can't I wake up?" Kagome found that she couldnt keep her panic up for long, 'Something about that woman is familiar, I just can't feel anything but safe around her...' and she slowly let her fear glide away. "I am a goddess who has taken a interest in things. Forgive me for not realizing things had gotten so out of hand. But do not worry; we will help fix things so you can do what must be done. What no other can do." was her almost inaudible reply.
"NOW WAKE UP!" The womasn voice suddenly boomed through Kagome's skull with power. ~*~*~END DREAM SEQUENCE
Kagome instantly gasped, causing her lungs to fill with water, she automatically pushed herself up and out of the water filled tub. Gasping for much needed air Kagome sat in the tile floor shivering, her naked body was covered in freezing water and the cold tile only made it worse. She sat there shivering and relearning how to breath for several minutes. Finally she stood up shakily, she was shaking so hard she almost fell-- again. Not wanting a repeat of the last couple of minutes she carefully made her way to the toilet and grabbed her towel. Wrapping it tightly around her body she sat down on the toilet, exhausted after the last two days of drama.
'Two days... has it really been only two days? And how long was I under? It couldnt of been too long or else I would have died... but--- the water is ice-sold now...'
Head in her hands Kagome thought about the woman and her dream, she frowned as the details started to slowly seep out like trying to hold sand in your hands. It seemed to find cracks in her mind and started to drift away. However Kagome did keep a few things, "the lady is right, no more tears! I have to be strong-- for everybody. I matter! I have school and training and two families waiting for me!" kagome told the air firmly. She got up proudly and walked out of the bathroom toward her room...
~~~~~BACK IN THE CLEARING
The man from before was sprawled comfortably on the ground watching the water-filled-bowl when the goddess from Kagome's dream appeared in the clearing once more. She turned those eyes on the man as she made her way to him.
"So, you not only managed to wake her but got to keep her from seeing that those dreams were nothing but air and a good bit of imagination." The man stated casually but the look of relief could not be ignored in his eyes. She let a small smile grace her lips before she settled gracefully on the ground.
"She is a good child, for all her pain it was her heart that got her out of the darkness. Mother and Father were right to have chosen her; she just might succeed in this task... What about you? Has he accepted things as they were meant to be or did your words go in one ear and out the other?" Was her amused and anxious reply.
The mans soft rumble could be heard in the air and felt in the ground, "Humph! Damn kid is a stubborn as she is. He is still following those damn soul-collectors." *sigh* "Then let us hope he realizes his mistakes before it is too late..." her whispery voice faded into the air as they continued to watch the bowl.
************************************************************************ Let me see... the next chapter is going to be a little confusing cuz it's going to be skipping around allot. I had to do that just so I could put what everyone's been doing but it also explains WHY Inuyasha left Kagome and what has happened to him. So that should please you guys.
Come on PLZ review! I worked so hard during my break to get this out to u guys. I even got the outlines for at LEAST three more chapters[Abd I mean who EVER get ANYTHING done during S.B?] . I don't rely on reviews to update BUT they do make me feel all warm and fuzzy which prompts me NOT to kill everyone. ^___^ j/k! Go~o o~n pu~sh i~t!!! U know u wanna!
Disclaimer: Too busy to writ up a cute dialogue so this is it. I own nothing! No plushies, no pictures, no manga, no anime. So HA! You cant sue!......... somehow that doesn't cheer me up as much as I thought it would... ************************************************************************ DARKNESS
Air bubbles were rising to the top of the tub, as the seconds ticked by they came slower and smaller until they stopped coming. The static surrounding Kagome was thicker than ever and the blue blurs she saw were slowly being blotted out by the darkness creeping into the edges of her already foggy vision. The darkness slowly covered all the blue and when it did she passed out...
~*~*~ START DREAM SEQUENCE
In her mind she saw nothing but darkness, soft, welcoming darkness. It surrounded her like a mothers arms, soft with a sense of security you can find nowhere else. Kagome was happily basking in the darkness when it was disturbed by a faint, glowing green light a few meters away.
It steadily grew stronger until it suddenly flared a green so bright it shone white that it was painfull and blinded her. As suddenly as it had appeared it just as quickly, disappeared. In its place was a beautiful woman; she had dark-ebony hair down past her knees almost to her ankles, rich, creamy white skin and the most amazingly warm, emerald-green eyes... Those eyes continued to glow softly with the same, soft green light, but this time it was warm and welcoming, not harsh.
In Kagome's sight all she saw was a colored fuzzy blob of a person, but that tiny green light that was the woman's eyes, glowing faintly, was strong enough to slowly wake her from the static surrounding her mind. The fog distorted shape stood a few meters from her in the darkness but that light still managed to warm her, pushing the numbing cold further down and away.
"Kagome, you have to wake up. From this dream and from the depression you have been in. You MUST wake up!"
The womans voice was warm and whispery with a faint echo as the static fought to keep its grip on Kagome, her voice chased away some more of the cold that had been surrounding her.
"There is more at stake here than you know, it is a big burden to have the task you were given but I promise that everything will be all right in the end."
'WHAT task?' Confused more than ever Kagome just listened to the woman and the voice that was slowly dissipating the static surrounding her.
"You have responsibilities, you cannot abandon them or the people that need you." The strange lady told her, while steadily walking closer. "What people? Nobody cares about me, they all left me. Alone." Kagome slurringly [A/N: think I just made up another word there] told the vision.
"Your wrong, they do care. But your family is not psychic, how were they supposed to know that you would be coming two weeks in advance? Besides they only went because your aunt got in a accident and they went to comfort and help the others. Are you really so hurt that you would resent that your mother console her only sister and her family?" she scolded Kagome gently.
Still too deep into the numbness Kagome didn't fully absorb what she was being told. Stubbornly she shook her head, "Their better off without me, all of them..." she stated weakly.
"No, they aren't." The woman told her kindly, "In fact they would be lost without you. Here let me show you."
She was standing in front of Kagome by then, she regally kneeled down to the girls level and gently took her chin in her grip to turn her so that they were looking into each other's eyes.
Those eyes, those emerald green eyes pulled Kagome in like a sirens call. The fog obscuring her vision cleared enough so that she was able to see those eyes perfectly. Strangely, those eyes were the clearest thing she had seen since she had crawled out of the well...
^*^*^*^*^*^ WHAT KAGOME SEES IN THE WOMANS EYES ^*^*^*^*^*^*
Kagome saw was a strong green light that were the womans eyes and then reality melted away, what was left of it, along with what was left of the static and fog surrounding her. When she was able to finally move away Kagome looked around and found that they were in her brothers room. All his things were as she had last seen them except that this time everything was coated in a thick blanket of dust.
Startled to find herself in her brothers room Kagome slowly made her way around it to see what had changed during her hurried visits to her own time. She was faintly surprised to find that all his child-toys were gone and in their place were teenage-boy things.
'He would be 13 or 14...' she let a small smile grace her lips at the memory of his outrage when the school told him that they would have to hold him back a year because his birthday was a month too late for admission into school. The smile grew as she remembered two years back when he was allowed to skip a grade because of his excellent scores.
She found various pictures of their family as she wandered aroundaimlessly only to stop short when she noticed that a whole shelf was dedicated to a young girl a year or two older than her brother. There were picture-booth pictures, some of them playing, holding hands, posing for the camera and it ranged from there.
So her brother had definitely grown up since the last time she had checked, she mentally beat herself up at that. How could she have missed out on something so big as to her brother having a girlfriend?
"Why did you bring me here and why is his room like this, like it hasn't been occupied for a long time?" Kagome turned to ask the woman who all that time had been leaning against the window by the bed. "Where's my brother?" She asked as her eyes fell on a more recent picture of Souta, it was a close-up that showed his face clearly.
His once porcelin smooth face was lined and had lost the roundness and innocent look of a child, he looked a bit worn and weighed down, making him look years older than what she knew him to be. "He looks so much older! What happened to put that look on his face, in his eyes?"
The woman heaved a heavy sigh and pushed herself from the window, she walked over to Kagome and led her to the bed so she could sit, the picture still in her hands. By then her silence was unnerving Kagome, "What's going on?!" ""Let me explain... After you died your mother went into a deep kind of grieving, your brother was still young-- he has always been a good soul. Unfortunately however good his heart is it was also rather fragile... he was not strong enough to bear your death AND your mothers pain. Believe it or not, he was always looking after you. He was very protective of you despite his being younger... he began to blame himself when they found your body in the bathroom..."
'No! Why would he blame himself? It had nothing to do with him...' "He loved you a great deal, without you he felt lost and alone. He was starving for some kind of human contact, it was no surprise when he turned to his girlfriend--- and got her pregnant." Shock ran through Kagome like ice down her spine, "But why would he do that? What about mom and grandpa and his friends?"
"He pushed his friends away and your family was mourning YOU, he didn't want to bother them-- especially your mother. They were all wrecks." Was the woman's soft answer, "But then where is he, with his wife or..." Kagome let her question trail of at the thought that her brother was alone and maybe even homeless.
"No, they were living here but they were all running low on money. What with your mother not working since she felt too sick to go in, so he was working three jobs to try and keep, not only him and the girl clothed and fed, but your mother as well. It wasn't enough, all it did was wear him down. One day he went and tried to rob a store but the owner was having none of it and shot him in self-defense. However desperate, your brother was no killer. The gun he used wasn't loaded, he thought to scare the owner into giving him the money-- that way no one would be hurt. He was dead before the police got there."
"You can only imagine the pain that your family felt, the girl lost the child in her shock and unfortunately she also lost her life on the way to the hospital..."
Kagome was shaking so bad that the picture fell from her hands onto the floor, the glass shattered on impact. Grasping her hands firmly to stop the shaking Kagome slowly turned to look down at the shattered picture. 'No! Souta... No! I was just, I was just trying to make the pain go away. I- -I just needed to get away for a bit. I never meant to hurt anybody...' "Be that as it may, your death caused irreparable consequences on your family." Came the uncanny reply, it seemed she could hear her thoughts as easily as her spoken words.
Kagome's chest tightened at the thought of her brothers death, 'It was MY fault, if I had been here more often...' "Or better yet if you hadn't given up and let your pain overwhelm you, you could have been there to stop it from happening at all." The woman chided her gently.
Startled by the woman's voice as much as her words Kagome turned to look at her and found those eyes locked on hers. Once again she had that strange feeling of reality fading away around her, once she found that she could break her gaze away from those unnervingly warm eyes she found herself in a dark room. But this time it was not the absolute darkness she had been in before, this room felt-- neglected, for lack of a better word.
As her eyes adjusted Kagome realized that she wasn't alone, there were two other people in the room with her. One was that woman with the brilliant green eyes at her back; the other was... her mother. 'Mom? What is she doing here?' As her eyes slowly adjusted to the light she saw what she had missed before, the room was not only dusty and neglected-- it was a mess... and so was her mother.
The older woman lay in a dirty, smelly heap in a unmade and disgustingly dirty bed. There were odd things strewn everywhere, from papers to old take-out containers to empty liquor bottles. Now that Kagome saw the bottles (there were quiet a few) the reek of stale liquor, old food and unwashed human entered her nose with a vengeance.
"She couldn't take the loss of another family member, she struggled to stay strong for Souta but it was too much for her. When she found out about his mistake and his death she... She started to drink more and more and soon found herself in a depression so deep it was self-destructive. This is the result, she now hardly leaves that bed except to use the bathroom and sometimes not even that..." the woman told her matter-of- factly.
Horrified at what she was seeing Kagome stepped toward her mother and shakily sat at the edge of the bed bedsides her. She slowly made herself take a closer look at her and almost cried out at what she saw.
Her mothers once beautiful face was slack and deathly pale. She was amazingly thin, almost cadaverous. Her eyes were long dead and her skin looked waxen, almost as if she had long since left this world and was just barley hanging on to life. This wasn't her mother this was just a husk of her former self.
From her perch at her bedside Kagome was able to fully appreciate the reek that clung to her mother. Not able to look into her many-lined face any more Kagome closed her eyes and turned away, 'I put that look in her eyes and face. I put those lines there...' To prevent her thoughts from consuming her she opened her eyes.
"What, what about my Jii-chan? What happened to him?" she whispered terrified of the answer but she had to know. The woman sighed heavily, "He's dead child, the shock of your death was too much for him. It was quick-- a heart attack. For someone his age it wasn't that bad a way to die... at least he didn't suffer like the others." She finished quietly.
Slowly she looked at the woman by the door, those eyes caught her gaze once more and felt a gut-turning jerk as she was hurled out of reality. When she could once again look away she found herself in feudal Japan inside the once familiar village. Kaede's village. It was now nothing more than a barren looking field, clearly an old battle ground cuz as they made their way across it Kagome tripped over an old piece of armor, looking around more closely she noticed that the ground was laden with armor and old bones.
"What happened" she asked dully while dreading the answer, her hands were shaking uncontrolably now as she tried her best to keep it together. "They were attacked by demons, they held up well but they could not win..." the woman trailed off. 'All those innocent people... they were my friends! This is worse than the pain I felt before, all my family, gone. Wait...' Kagome's train of thoughts were cut off at the hope bubbling up inside her.
"What about the others, their still alive right?" she asked the woman eagerly. Her response was the woman's piercing eyes capturing her again, when she gained control once more they were in another part of feudal Japan...
They were standing at the edge of a huge crater; it was so big that the village could have fit into it easily.
"What happened here, why did you bring me here?" Her nerves were already stretched past their limit and the woman's mysteriousness did nothing to help. "This is Miroku's grave." Was all the answer Kagome got. 'Kami help him...' the crater was ten times bigger than the one his father had left behind!
In her grief Kagome failed to realize that with Naraku dead her friend's wind-tunnel would have healed instead of getting worse! U.U*
'Poor Sango...' "Her grave is here too," the woman stated, her eyes never leaving the crater. Shock ran through Kagome like a electrical jolt. She stood frozen while her companion explained, "she jumped in with the monk, refusing to leave him. They died in each others arms."
"B-but-but what- what about... Kohaku. Did Sango leave him after everything that's happened?" Her lips tingled after she spoke as the shock ran through and out her body lazily. "Kohaku never made it, he went mad at the memories of what he had done. Sango had been trying her hardest to save him but he was too much for her. He overpowered her and killed Kirara, he would have killed her too except that Miroku was there to help..."
The rest of Kagome started to shake at the matter-of-fact words coming from that woman, "He managed to damage Miroku's hand some more before Sango killed her own brother." The softly spoken words did little to help; wrapping her arms around herself Kagome found that she couldn't look away from the crater, a memorial to her friends and family. "Did they live a good life after-- before Miroku..." shaking so horribly that her legs couldn't support her anymore Kagome's words trailed off and she dropped to the ground on her knees.
"They were happy for about a year, they both knew that Miroku's time was limited, they just didn't know how limited... they were starting a family when Miroku felt the hole in his hand growing rapidly. Sango was pregnant, approximatly 3 weeks from giving birth when it happened." That dumped cold water over her spirit.
Kagome felt her eyes grow big and the trembling stop at that bit of news, she stared sightlessly from the edge of the crater at their memorial and started to rock back and forth slightly. 'She-- she was, pregnant...' Realization at the true tragedy of the situation had Kagome reeling. Looking up she found the woman's eyes once more and the scenery warped and shifted again.
This time they found themselves in a clearing, in the center instead of the hard-packed clay was a large, molten, glassy-looking clay. "What's this?" was all she could bring herself to say. As the combined sensation of the warp and Sango's sacrifice caused the nausea to win as she threw-up all over the ground. It hurt, since she had nothing in her stomach to throw-up all that came was bile and spit, her stomach cramping painfully.
"This is Inuyasha. You see after you left Kikyo dragged him into hell with her. Since he HAD promised -stubborn boy- and his only other responsibility and reason for living was gone-- he let her do as she wished. Hoping that maybe he would be able to land in the watching chambers of hell where would be able to watch you for all eternity at least." [A/N: that's somewhere where your forced to watch all your loved ones live a happy life while your stuck in the dark, alone, unable to interact, eat or sleep. It greek mythology--I think, Instead of going to the Elysian Fields. Obviously Im too lazy to look it up and find the actual name for it.]
"Unfortunately, since Kikyo was already dead she could not die again. The earth spit her back out... enraged at this she lost what little heart she had left and turned into a new evil. Leading army's of demons on innocents and taking souls just so she could feel SOMETHING. Eventually she turned into a kind of succubus, absorbing emotions out of people along with their souls..."
Something in the woman's voice had changed, it was still matter-of- fact but there was a undertone to it.
A burning sensation pricked the back of her throat and the back of her eyes as she absorbed everything, "And, and Shippo" she asked meekly. Hoping that at least HE was still alive.
The woman looked stiffly up at the air above the crater, "Do you really want to know?" in all the time they had talked she had NEVER been cold. Matter-of-fact yes but always soft-spoken. The coldness from her voice could give frostbite and made Kagome shiver in spite of herself.
A lone tear made its way down Kagome's cheek slowly, her hopes dashed. "No," she breathed shakily. Once more Kagome looked into those strangely bright green eyes, this time willingly letting the power take her where it willed. When the ride was over she looked around and saw that she was once more surrounded by darkness and the woman was kneeling in front of her.
On the ground Kagome continued to look into her eyes and found that they were just-- eyes. Strangely glowing eyes but still-- just, eyes. Shaking herself mentally Kagome backed away from the strange apparition in front of her and found that the previously black, white and green blob in front of her was clearer now.
Thinking back on it during the little trip they had just taken not once did she catch anything more than the scenes she had been shown and those eyes.
What she had seen... the barrier in her head suddenly shattered like broken glass. It had been creeping up on her as soon as she had returned, but the memories she had of the visions in the woman's eyes were enough to break its hold on her completely. She was already on her knees in a place where she had no floor to support her except darkness. The scenarios the woman had showed her cut her deeply enough that the pain overwhelmed her. It was like a physical pain, she clutched her stomach and rocked back and forth as she let the pain ride her.
She had let out a scream of agony so great that even the woman felt her agony in her soul. She cried deep raking sobs that made raked deep tremors from her slight frame. The woman crouched before her laid a hand on her shoulder; it was like ice in a scorching atmosphere of pain, it caused her to look up and into her face. This time those eyes didn't be-spell her and she was able to get a true look at her face.
That face. Something about that face...
"Let it out child, let it out. You must purge yourself of this pain; you must let it wash over you and then float away like a wave. Otherwise it will consume you..." Kagome didn't know how long she just sat there and finally cried the loss of the heartbroken.
She was different; she didn't have it in her to hate them just for their happiness, just like she couldn't leave a person stranded even when she was inadequate help. She just didn't have that in her and that was what made her different. Despite everything her heart was too pure to for true hate. Thats why all that pain, anger, hurt, and bitterness was purged from her body by her tears.
When her cries finally slowed she found herself practically in the strange woman's lap, just like a mother she ran her hand soothingly up, down and in circles on Kagome's back. Every now and then she made cooing noises that soothes her like a cup of steaming homemade cocoa on a cold winters night. It was enough to break the spell that had washed over her since she had learned of her lovers betrayl.
"Do you see now? Do you see that your death will solve nothing; in fact it will only worsen things. Even without having been shown those images how could you think of abandoning your family like that? You have to let this go-- for their sake and yours. Everything will work itself out, for better or for worse. Trust in yourself, and don't let some boy rule you. You are far stronger than that! You were made to be stronger than that..."
The woman's words rang a bell deep in Kagome's soul but for the life if her she couldn't filter out what it meant. Ignoring it she concentrated on her fears, she didn't want harm to fall on anybody that was why she had left in the first place...
"I left so that I wouldn't hurt anybody and so that the pain would go away..." the tears flowed freely down her cheeks at the pain that surfaced in her heart.
"Don't you see child? The pain that your running from is what keeps you apart from the dead, pain is the body's way to telling us that we are still alive. You saw your mother-- however much she was still breathing-- she was nothing but a shell. I showed you those things for a reason!" The woman slowly came into focus as Kagome's tear-dilled eyes drained away.
"Are you willing to inflict all that pain on your family? They already lost your father, would you really put them through that again? Just because you feel bad? They need you, all of them do. The ones from your own time AND those in Feudal Japan. Whether you believe it or not you are the piece that holds everything together, YOU are what makes you family work so well."
The woman reached a lily-soft hand to cup Kagome's cheek, immediately the pain in confusion in her faded and she was able to see things slightly clearer in her minds eye.
"Even your friends would feel your loss, does that kind boy not always bring you gifts and such. And do they all not ask how you are faring? They always try to help, even when their help is not the right kind. Their hearts are in the right place, is yours? Can you really leave everybody alone like that?"
"What about Inuyasha? He left me, because I wasn't enough. He didn't love me.." the thought made her sick and weak all over again. The static tried to fight the light that emanated from the woman but she firmly pushed it back. She needed to know.
"And since when does a guy matter so much? Are you that much of a pushover that a few pretty words and some gifts from him will tame you? Are you so weak that a little heart-ache and doubt will break you?" The woman's words made their way through the doubt in Kagome's mind. 'I am NOT a push over!' she snapped out of her thoughts and doubt and looked into the woman's eyes. 'She's right; Iv NEVER let Inuyasha walk all over me, why should I start now? ...'
"But, Kikyo.." doubt crept into Kagome's heart again. "Forget Kikyo! She doesn't matter. She does not fit into the picture; she has a separate path to follow! ... We have let things get out of hand and that is our mistake to fix. Not yours. Do not worry, everything will work itself out..." worried that she was losing Kagome the woman reached out and grabbed her on either side of her face and willed her too see...
Flashes of what the woman had previously showed her passed though her minds eye like wildfire as she was forced to look into the womans eyes again, all that pain and suffering was caused by HER. No, she couldn't let that happen...
'Enough, enough...' "ENOUGH!" Kagome jerked out of the strange woman's grasp and lay sprawled on the floor crying. 'They all died! Bbut before they passed away they suffered so much. I-- I should have been there to help them. I'm so selfish!!! "Damn, damn, damn!" with each word she pounded her fist on the 'ground' in emphasis.
"Why did you show me that? WHY?!" desperate Kagome lunged herself at the woman in anger only to collapse crying into her lap again. "Child I showed you those things so that you would see that your are definitely needed and ARE appreciated. You have made so many changes in their lives just by being there. You have helped every life that you have touched, just by being you...Your heart is the biggest I have seen in a long time, it shines even in the darkness." Confused Kagome took her words literally and looked down at her chest, what she saw made her gasp.
In her chest a faint purple light was glowing VERY faintly, as she looked at it, the light steadily grew stronger until she was bathed in her own light just like the strange woman when she had first appeared. Confused Kagome looked around and realized that she was dreaming, she tried to wake up but found that she couldn't. 'What?! Dreams don't work like this. One you realize that its a dream you wake up, What going on?!'
"You see? If you were not as strong as you are I would not have been able to come to you..." The light surrounding Kagome steadily pushed the darkness back, raising all sorts of questions in her mind. 'Why do I glow like that woman?' The thought caused Kagome to look more closely at her and she gasped.
'Something about her is familiar, something about that face...'
"Child, you are needed in this time and the past. You have accomplished a great deal, do not throw it away. You still have things to accomplish. Remember! You MUST must remember the...! YOU ARE NEED! In more ways than one..." the woman's voice was fasing but Kagome noticed the faint tinge of panic to it.
Her words frightened her and found rando questions tumbling out of her mouth in her panick. "Who are you!? What's going on here, why can't I wake up?" Kagome found that she couldnt keep her panic up for long, 'Something about that woman is familiar, I just can't feel anything but safe around her...' and she slowly let her fear glide away. "I am a goddess who has taken a interest in things. Forgive me for not realizing things had gotten so out of hand. But do not worry; we will help fix things so you can do what must be done. What no other can do." was her almost inaudible reply.
"NOW WAKE UP!" The womasn voice suddenly boomed through Kagome's skull with power. ~*~*~END DREAM SEQUENCE
Kagome instantly gasped, causing her lungs to fill with water, she automatically pushed herself up and out of the water filled tub. Gasping for much needed air Kagome sat in the tile floor shivering, her naked body was covered in freezing water and the cold tile only made it worse. She sat there shivering and relearning how to breath for several minutes. Finally she stood up shakily, she was shaking so hard she almost fell-- again. Not wanting a repeat of the last couple of minutes she carefully made her way to the toilet and grabbed her towel. Wrapping it tightly around her body she sat down on the toilet, exhausted after the last two days of drama.
'Two days... has it really been only two days? And how long was I under? It couldnt of been too long or else I would have died... but--- the water is ice-sold now...'
Head in her hands Kagome thought about the woman and her dream, she frowned as the details started to slowly seep out like trying to hold sand in your hands. It seemed to find cracks in her mind and started to drift away. However Kagome did keep a few things, "the lady is right, no more tears! I have to be strong-- for everybody. I matter! I have school and training and two families waiting for me!" kagome told the air firmly. She got up proudly and walked out of the bathroom toward her room...
~~~~~BACK IN THE CLEARING
The man from before was sprawled comfortably on the ground watching the water-filled-bowl when the goddess from Kagome's dream appeared in the clearing once more. She turned those eyes on the man as she made her way to him.
"So, you not only managed to wake her but got to keep her from seeing that those dreams were nothing but air and a good bit of imagination." The man stated casually but the look of relief could not be ignored in his eyes. She let a small smile grace her lips before she settled gracefully on the ground.
"She is a good child, for all her pain it was her heart that got her out of the darkness. Mother and Father were right to have chosen her; she just might succeed in this task... What about you? Has he accepted things as they were meant to be or did your words go in one ear and out the other?" Was her amused and anxious reply.
The mans soft rumble could be heard in the air and felt in the ground, "Humph! Damn kid is a stubborn as she is. He is still following those damn soul-collectors." *sigh* "Then let us hope he realizes his mistakes before it is too late..." her whispery voice faded into the air as they continued to watch the bowl.
************************************************************************ Let me see... the next chapter is going to be a little confusing cuz it's going to be skipping around allot. I had to do that just so I could put what everyone's been doing but it also explains WHY Inuyasha left Kagome and what has happened to him. So that should please you guys.
Come on PLZ review! I worked so hard during my break to get this out to u guys. I even got the outlines for at LEAST three more chapters[Abd I mean who EVER get ANYTHING done during S.B?] . I don't rely on reviews to update BUT they do make me feel all warm and fuzzy which prompts me NOT to kill everyone. ^___^ j/k! Go~o o~n pu~sh i~t!!! U know u wanna!
