AN: You're going to find out a lot more about Rachel/Jesse this chapter. And I think Jesse is most likely going to enter the story soon. Don't worry, his mission is not going to be to break them up (though his presence will cause a Hummelberry rift). Once Puckleberry is officially together, I'm planning on keeping them that way—that isn't to say they won't have their troubles, but I don't have plans to split them up or anything.

And a word on Quinn. Thanks for all the suggestions. They were all great and it was nice to see where everyone stands when it comes to who they want to see her with. I'm taking them all into consideration as I decide what to do with her. And just because she starts dating someone doesn't mean they're endgame. Remember, Quinn has never had a boyfriend and has never been kissed. She wants to experience college and the dating scene before she dates that one guy who's the love of her life.

Sorry for such this long note. One last thing. The 'so much so fast' a reviewer asked about. I know nothing happened between them physically. Rachel is referring to the emotional bond they made that day. Rachel and Puck spent hours talking to one another, sharing things about themselves that two people who just met normally wouldn't talk about. So emotionally, it was a lot in a very fast period of time, something neither of them was really ready for yet. Puck responded by hooking up with another girl (the fact that he was drunk partially added to him doing that) while Rachel responded by breaking down over a guy she barely knew.

"You are the worst best friend ever, I hope you know. I'm adding this to the list. You owe me ice cream later for breaking the cardinal role of our friendship," Rachel ranted as she and Kurt walked along the path through campus, heading towards the theater school where auditions for the fall musical were being held.

"Get over yourself, diva. I said last year after Les Miserables that it was my last show. I don't know why you're so surprised."

"I thought you were kidding! You, I, and theater are like three peas in a pod. This feels so unnatural. There's never been a musical I tried out for that you didn't audition for as well. Just can't imagine being on stage without you. Just like it's weird being in class without you. Do you know how hard it is to concentrate when my best gay isn't there next to me?"

"I don't see what the big deal is. I said senior year I was doing fashion, not theater. This clearly shows how well you listen to me."

"I did listen to you," she protested, leaning against the wall outside the theater door. "I just thought—or hoped—you'd change your mind. You're my best friend, Kurt. Hell, you're practically my brother. We're supposed to be in classes together and spending all our time together!"

"We do spend all our time together," he laughed. "I see you more than I see Sam, and he lives with me," he teased.

Rachel gave him a look. "Not the same thing. You know what I mean. We're supposed to go through college together, just like we planned."

"Hey, I had to cut the apron strings at some point. What, did you expect us to live together even after you forgive and marry your roomie's hot brother? We're in college now, Rachel. We can't be joined at the hip anymore." Rachel frowned. "No, stop. I'm not saying I don't want to be friends. I just mean we have to do our own thing as well. After all, how else are we going to make friends if we just stay with each other? It's time to spread your wings and fly, little bird," he teased.

Rachel rolled her eyes, shoving him in the shoulder. "You're still the Fred to my Ginger."

Kurt smiled, leaning forward and kissed her on the forehead. "And I wouldn't have it any other way. Knock 'em dead. I'll wait out here for you and we'll celebrate your successful audition with gross dining hall food," he joked, patting her back as he nudged her towards the door.

Rachel took a deep breath as she pulled the door open, walking inside. There was a group of about twenty or thirty girls sitting in the front rows, talking amongst themselves. Off to the side, there was an Asian girl seated with a clipboard in her hand. She was dressed in a long, patchwork skirt paired with sandals and a lacy tank-top. On her head, she had a brown, knit hat, giving her a very hippie look.

To her side was a boy in a wheelchair who was deep in conversation with her. Rachel guessed they were in charge of the show, but she could have been wrong. After all, she didn't know anyone here—she was positive she was the only freshman who had signed up to audition with the hope that maybe she'd get a small role that had one solo.

Rachel took a seat behind a group of girls who were talking and laughing, making her feel very alone, just as she had in high school. She couldn't remember an audition she went to where Kurt wasn't right by her side, giving her at least one person to talk to. In high school, classes she had without Kurt were very much like this, sitting on the outside listening to conversations of others but not feeling confident enough to join in. Rachel didn't want to be that girl anymore.

"Um, hi," she said, her voice quiet. The four girls stopped talking and looked over at her. At first, Rachel thought they were going to ignore her. They kept looking at her like she was a bug or something. Maybe she should just move away.

"Hi!" the one girl said enthusiastically. She was dressed in a green top with flowers and jeans. She had dark hair that was hanging loose around her face. At first look, she seemed a little intimidating, but her warm smile made Rachel feel a little more comfortable. "You look terrified," she commented. "I'm Mercedes," she said, introducing herself. "Mercedes Jones. This is Spencer Bradley, Marie Snyder, and Izzy Mears. We're all seniors."

As Rachel looked at the four girls, she felt very out of place. They were all dressed differently, but none of them looked like they fit in with the general public. They had lots of bright colors, unusual patterns, and wild styles. Rachel, however, had on a white sundress with striped wedges. She felt like the antithesis to everything they were, just as she had every day in her theater classes. She'd gone form the big fish in high school to not even a minnow here. She had been starting to regret her choice from the first day she walked into class and stuck out like a sore thumb.

"Rachel Berry," she said, trying to keep the discomfort out of her voice. It wasn't hard—she was a good actress, after all. "I'm…I'm a freshman," she admitted.

The reaction was instantaneous. Three of the girls started laughing. "Oh yeah, I'm sure you're going to get a part," Marie mocked, turning away from her as she fell back into conversation with Spencer and Izzy. Rachel's face went red.

Mercedes sighed. "Ignore them. They can be a bit…rude. We don't get a lot of freshman who audition for the show here—don't be disappointed if you don't get a part," she said kindly. "It's nothing against you personally, but David doesn't like putting freshman in his shows, and neither does Sue. Though David graduated, so I can't speak for Artie. Sue, however, still has a say in everything. I don't know where she is, though," Mercedes said, looking around.

The door opened and a young girl with red hair walked in, rushing towards the front to where the Asian girl and the boy in the wheelchair were sitting. Rachel saw her say something quickly to them before nodding and taking a seat with them.

The boy wheeled more towards the front, clearing his throat. Mercedes gave Rachel one more smile before turning and looking at the boy. "Hey everyone, I hope you had a great summer. For the new people here, I'm Artie Abrams. In case everyone forgot, I'm taking over David's job as director this year. Tina Cohen-Chang my good friend and fantastic actress, will be helping me for the fall before she gets right back into her role as actress for the spring. To her left is Emma Pillsbury, Sue's TA. Apparently, Ms. Sylvester is busy with her new baby, so Emma's going to be seeing over the production for the fall. Alright, let's get started. Remember, you have one song to wow us with. Just let Brad know what you're singing so he can play for you."

Artie started calling names up one by one. Each girl would introduce herself before the pianist would begin playing. Each girl was better than the previous, and Rachel felt very out of her league. In between girls, Mercedes started explaining how things worked. They would find out the cast list about half an hour after the last girl sang. The boys' try-outs had been yesterday, so they all knew their parts already. In fact, Mercedes' boyfriend Shane had gotten one of the main parts, but he refused to tell her which part.

"I don't even understand why we're doing Beauty and the Beast. David would have never picked something like this. Last year he was saying how he really wanted to do Spring Awakening, but I suppose it's Artie's choice." She looked around the room which only had a few girls left. "Looks like we're up soon," she said.

Mercedes' name was called next and she headed up to the stage. She clearly knew everyone who was judging, definitely giving her an edge over everyone else. She sang both parts of "Take Me or Leave Me" from Rent, and pulled it off beautifully. Rachel was sure she wasn't even going to get the part of the feather duster now. Everyone here was so much better than her.

As Mercedes passed her on her way out, she gave Rachel thumbs up, whispering a few words of luck.

Eventually, everyone had gone except Rachel. Artie called her name and she stood up, walking up to the stage. She was shaking from head to toe, something that was unusual for her. She never got nervous, especially when she was auditioning for something. She wished she'd been able to go first and not have to hear everyone else sing first.

"Hi, I'm Rachel Berry," she mumbled.

She heard the girl, Tina, let out a sigh and mutter something under her breath. "Louder!" she yelled, earning her a look from Artie.

"My name's Rachel Berry," she said louder. "I'm a freshman, and I really don't know what I'm doing here anymore. I think I should just go."

"Hold up, why do you think you should leave?" Artie asked, wheeling closer to the stage. "If you signed up, clearly you do belong here."

Rachel let out a sigh. "I'm not good enough. I thought I was, but after listening to everyone else sing, I know I'm not. I used to think I had this amazing voice, but I think it's only because no one else from my town really could carry a tune except my best friend, and even he was smart enough to not think he could try out for the show as a freshman."

Artie shook his head. "Just because you're a freshman doesn't mean you don't have a chance of being Belle. But I can guarantee you that if you don't sing for us, you don't have a shot. What were you going to sing?"

"'I Dreamed a Dream' from Les Miserables. I was Fantine last year in our school play, but only because our director wouldn't let me try out for Valjean."

"Well, that's a challenging song. I think you have to be at least part way decent if you were able to sing that. Why don't you go ahead and sing it for us? We're not going to laugh at you, I promise," Artie said.

Rachel was still trembling, but she nodded her head reluctantly. Brad, the pianist, gave her a nod before he began playing the song. Rachel closed her eyes, trying to summon the courage to pull this off. Surprisingly, it wasn't Kurt's face or her dads faces that gave her the confidence she so desperately needed at the moment.

It was Noah's. She saw him standing there in her mind, giving her a smile, telling her she could do this. And with that thought, she knew she could.

Rachel took a deep breath before it was her turn to sing.

There was a time when men were kind
When their voices were soft
And their words inviting
There was a time when love was blind
And the world was a song
And the song was exciting
There was a time
Then it all went wrong

The one reason Rachel had originally fallen in love with the tragic character of Fantine was because she reminded her of herself. Well, part of herself. When Rachel had practiced this song, she saw herself singing it to Jesse St. James, her only ex-boyfriend.

She'd met him in the winter of her sophomore year. She'd just turned sixteen a few weeks before, so she'd decided to spend her birthday money on some new sheet music. That was where she met him. She'd heard about him, of course—he was the king of Carmel High. Everyone in the Ohio show choir world knew of him and his incredible voice. There was also the talk of how he was an arrogant asshole, someone not to be trusted.

Of course, he never seemed that way to Rachel. Not when she first met him, at least. He was charming, sweet, funny—and he only had eyes for her. They spent four hours at the music store, playing piano and singing. Before he left, he'd asked her out and Rachel had said yes. She knew she hardly knew him, but he was the first boy ever who had shown an interest in her. Plus, he was cute, sweet, and a senior. She was never going to be able to do better than him.

I dreamed a dream in time gone by
When hope was high
And life worth living
I dreamed that love would never die
I dreamed that God would be forgiving
Then I was young and unafraid
And dreams were made and used and wasted
There was no ransom to be paid
No song unsung, no wine untasted

Jesse started coming over to Rachel's house every day, spending time with her while her dads were working. He was always a total gentleman, never even attempting to pressure her to do anything. Rachel was very young and innocent then. Her only boyfriend had been someone who was gay, something she told Jesse a week into dating him. He promised to take it slow with her, and he held up his end of the promise.

When they first started dating, Rachel was in rehearsals for the school musical (It had been Guys and Dolls that year with Rachel playing the innocent Sarah Brown). Jesse would come and rehearse with her, even giving her tips on how to make the songs sound better. She'd taken it, of course—he was the expert in the area.

But the tigers come at night
With their voices soft as thunder
As they tear your hope apart
As they turn your dream to shame

Rachel wasn't sure when everything changed. Jesse had spent months telling her how beautiful her voice was, how perfect she was, how she was going to be a star. Then he suddenly changed his tune. He told her how she dressed like a toddler, how she wasn't good enough to be the lead in the musical, let alone be on Broadway.

Rachel should have ended things there, but she didn't. She loved him. She didn't think it was possible to fall in love with someone after only a few months, but somehow she did. She'd fallen head over heels for Jesse, and he knew it. He could tell by the way Rachel looked at him and how she talked around him.

He abused that power, knowing he had someone who was fully devoted to him. He spent his time with her tearing her down, finding something she was insecure about and harping on it relentlessly. Rachel had been hugely confident before meeting Jesse, always believing in herself. However, she began doubting everything about herself. Even Kurt noticed it in her, noting how quiet she'd grown, never volunteering for solos in glee club anymore.

He slept a summer by my side
He filled my days with endless wonder
He took my childhood in his stride
But he was gone when autumn came

Rachel was often ashamed to admit that she had gone further with Jesse than she'd been ready for. She never slept with him, but she'd allowed him to get past second base with her, something she hadn't been ready for at the time. In fact, she still wasn't really ready for that.

Jesse used her, convinced her to do things she wasn't ready for while simultaneously making her doubt herself and her abilities. She lost her dream for Broadway, her desire to be a star. He thrived on that, relished in her pain and self-doubt. Once he figured out all her insecurities and doubts, he never let her forget them.

And still I dream he'll come to me
That we will live the years together
But there are dreams that cannot be
And there are storms we cannot weather

Jesse eventually showed Rachel how truly ugly he was when she found him making out with some girl who wasn't her in the back of his car. That had been all she needed to find the strength to walk away. Of course, it didn't mean she stopped caring for him.

Even now, a part of her still wished she could get him back. Jesse was her first (and only) love. That didn't just go away overnight. She still loved him, and she wasn't sure what would happen if she somehow ran into him.

She still felt immense guilt that Kurt had no idea about her and Jesse. She was ashamed about lying to him, but she knew he'd never forgive her if she told him for lying to him over all these years. She often wished he knew so she could talk to him about dreams she had that Jesse was in, but she never could. In that way, Rachel felt completely alone.

I had a dream my life would be
So different from this hell I'm living
So different now from what it seemed
Now life has killed the dream I dreamed.

Rachel let out a gasp as she finished, her left hand clutching her chest. She didn't realize she was crying until she felt a singular tear land on her lower lip. She took a deep breath before looking up at the three people left in the auditorium.

All of them were looking at her, shock evident on their faces. No one seemed to be able to speak; however, Artie seemed to find his voice eventually. "I…wow," was all he said. "I don't think we've ever had an audition like that before, and certainly not with anyone singing the song the way you did. If we were doing Les Miserables, this is the part where I would offer you whatever part you wanted without hesitation. Since we're not doing Les Miserables, I'll settle for saying you're more than qualified to be our Belle. I don't even know the last time a freshman got a leading role, but you deserve it. I don't know why you would ever think you weren't good enough to audition, but you are, Rachel. You've got…whatever it is. If I had my choice, I'd offer you all future female leads as well, but I think Sue would murder me."

Tina, who had seemed a bit unfriendly, even managed to give Rachel a small smile as she stepped off the stage.

Artie and Rachel exchanged numbers with him promising to text her as soon as he'd decided on their first rehearsal. She gave him a hug, thanking him before gathering up her things and walking out of the auditorium, a slight spring in her step. The group of girls was outside waiting for the cast list to be posted, each girl looking as nervous as Rachel had been before getting up on stage.

Kurt was sitting off to the side, still waiting for her. She walked over to him and threw her arms around his neck. She was grinning ear to ear. "Come on, let's go," she said, linking arms with him and leading him away from the theater.

"Aw, guess the little freshie didn't get a part. Surprise, surprise," Izzy sneered. Rachel just ignored her—she'd find out soon enough. Best not ruin the surprise.

"Alright, what's going on?" Kurt asked when they were away from the group of girls. "Why aren't you waiting for the cast list like everyone else?"

"I'm Belle. They told me after I finished my song that I'm Belle. I was the last girl to sing, and the director offered it to me right there!" she squealed, jumping up a little.

"Diva!" Kurt laughed, taking her hands and jumped with her. "I knew it! I knew you were going to knock them dead in there! This calls for a celebration. We're going out tomorrow. You, me, the roomies, and anyone else we want. Rachel Berry, star of Beauty and the Beast. Oh, I can't believe it!" he laughed.

Rachel bit her lip for a moment, looking at Kurt. "Hey Kurtie? I think there's someone else I want to invite to come with us, if it's okay."

Kurt gave her a knowing smile and nodded his head. "I'll meet you back at your room. Give the boy a call. I'll let Quinn know you're on your way—don't worry, I won't spoil your big news," he called, walking off.

Rachel took a deep breath before scrolling until the name on her phone. She highlighted it and called, pressed the phone to her ear.

"Rach?" a voice asked, sounding a little confused.

"Hi, Noah," she said softly. "I know you're probably surprised to be hearing from me."

"Yeah, just a little," he said, letting out a small laugh. "What's up?"

"I…I wanted to thank you."

"Thank me?"

"I had my audition for the musical today, and I felt so nervous going up there. But I remembered how you said I could do it and how I had a great voice, and you helped me feel like I could sing. I saw your face in my head, and I knew that if you thought I could do it, I really could. And I did—I got the lead!"

"Oh, that's wonderful, Rachel!" she heard Puck say, and she could tell he really meant it.

"But, Kurt wants to go out this weekend. To celebrate, you know? And, I wanted to know if you wanted to come with us."

"Are you sure?" he asked. "I mean, you said you didn't want to see me for a while," he reminded her. "I mean, it's almost been two weeks—I thought you needed more time than that. Not that I'm complaining," he added.

"Well, I realized that even though you're a bit of a slutty arrogant jerk, I miss you, as crazy as that is. I don't have anyone else I can pick on for being slutty or tease relentlessly about anything that comes to my mind. I really do want you to come, Noah. Celebrating something I wouldn't be doing without your suggestion seems wrong if you're not there to celebrate with me. So, please say you'll come?"

She heard him laugh on the other end of the phone. "Alright, alright. I'll come," he promised. "I'll get the rest of the information out of my sister. And Rachel, I know I don't deserve you or your forgiveness or anything, but I'm still sorry about what happened."

"Honestly Noah, I'd like to forget that night ever happened. So really, as long as you're all behaved and everything Friday night, I'll be ready to forgive you. I'll see you then." Rachel hung up her phone and smiled to herself. She started back to her dorm, a grin on her face the whole way.

Major Puckleberry next chapter. Also, in case you were a little confused, this chapter takes place about two weeks after the last chapter.