Entry #28: Monday May 1, 1972 – Three Days After
During April Fool's Day, Sirius was burdened by a girlfriend he couldn't get rid of. It took him the entire day to break up with her, so Sirius and James were not able to partake in "the merriment that is the day of fools." Those were their words, not mine. Personally, I thought it was fantastic that they didn't have time to wreak havoc, but it's apparently important that they have an entire day dedicated to pranking everyone. They rescheduled April Fool's Day for today.
The only warning I received on the matter was another note pinned to my pajamas when I woke up this morning. 'Welcome, Remus, to the Mayday of Fools! Remember to take the necessary precautions and have a nice day!' I didn't know what that meant because I was pretty sure the 'Day of Fools' had already happened, but I quickly found out when I was rummaging through my wardrobe to find my outfit for the day. I couldn't find any of my underpants. A quick glance around the room told me that everyone else was missing their underpants, too.
Conveniently, James and Sirius had already gone down to breakfast.
Thinking they must have hidden our underpants, I searched everywhere. It took a while, but I eventually found the stash under James' bed. At first I was excited, but then I realized what had happened. They hadn't stopped at hiding our underpants. For their first prank, James and Sirius had shrunk every single pair of underpants that could be found in our dormitory. Including their own, so we wouldn't think to borrow theirs.
Wesley claimed he didn't have time for underpants, so he left without, obviously finding their prank amusing. All of the other boys were patient enough to let me re–enlarge one pair for each of them before they went down to yell at James and Sirius. I enlarged a pair for myself and went to find Allie, knowing it wouldn't do any good to say anything to either of them. It was their 'Mayday of Fools,' and there was nothing anyone could say to stop them.
I couldn't find Allie right away, so I decided to ask the first girl I spotted, and that girl was Lily. When I asked her where Allie was, Lily gave me a grimace and looked up the stairs to the girls' dormitories. "She's still up there," she said slowly. "It's bad, so be nice when you see her." Lily smiled sadly before walking past me and out the portrait hole.
I wasn't sure what had happened, but it had to have been James and Sirius. Boys aren't allowed in the girls' dormitories, so I sat down on the bottom stair and waited, hoping whatever they had done to her wasn't too horrible. At least fifteen minutes passed before I heard the door open. I glanced up and saw Brittany at the top of the stairs, her hands reaching inside the room in an attempt to drag Allie out. "Come on!" Brittany was insisting. "Allie, it doesn't look bad at all. It's actually very pretty!" Brittany spotted me and had an idea. "Remus! Remus is down here, Allie. He'll tell you, but you have to come downstairs."
I heard her groan, but Allie reluctantly let her friend pull her out of the room. My mouth fell open, but I quickly closed it before she could see the surprise on my face. Lily had told me to be nice, and now I understood why.
"What happened?" I asked, already thinking of ways to get back at James and Sirius.
Brittany frowned. "Someone switched out her shampoo," she said. "We're not sure when they did it, but Allie woke up this morning and her hair was like that."
"Remus!" Allie moaned, running down the stairs. I caught her and awkwardly patted her on the back, trying to console her. "They turned my hair blue! My. Hair. Is. Blue."
"It was Sirius and James, I'm sure. They shrunk my underpants, too," I told, not trying to outdo her misfortune. My underpants had been fixable. I didn't know any spells to turn her hair back to its usually lovely blonde colour.
She pulled back and gave me a confused look. "Your underpants?" she wondered. "Why would they shrink your underpants? Why would they turn my hair blue?"
"I'm not sure," I said, still holding her. It was remarkable that my breathing was still normal. "They left me a note and said that today is the 'Mayday of Fools,' which I think is like April Fool's Day, but it's in May . . . They're probably doing this because they didn't get to celebrate the actual April Fool's Day."
Allie's nostrils flared. "They're terrible!" she cried. "What else are they going to do?"
"I have no idea," I said, shaking my head. "But I'm hoping they'll stick to one prank per person. The worst pranks are yet to come, I'm sure, and they've gotten us out of the way first."
"You think?" I nodded, and she sighed. "Good. I'd hate to see what they came up with that's worse than turning someone's hair blue. This is just awful. I don't look hideous, do I? Be honest, Remus."
"No, you look fine," I assured. Her hair was blue and she was still beautiful. "Brittany was right. It's actually a very nice colour of blue."
"See, Allie?" Brittany said. "You don't have to hide in the room. Thanks for getting her to come out, Remus. I guess I'll see you two in class."
"Yeah, sure," I said as she strode out of the common room. Allie and I followed her out and went down to breakfast, where we sat as far away from James and Sirius as possible. There were a few people staring at Allie's strange new hair colour, but she held her head high and braved our sniggering classmates with dignity.
I glanced down the table to James and Sirius. Peter had joined them, and was giggling about something James had just said. I guess Pete had forgiven them already. Sirius gave me a challenging look and I shook my head, letting him know I was bothered. He nodded back, as if to assure me the blue hair was the worst Allie would experience. I mouthed my thanks to him, and he smiled, gesturing for me to join them. That I couldn't agree to. Allie still needed me, and I didn't want to hear the list of pranks they had scheduled for the day. It would be very tempting to tell a teacher if I knew their plans, and I didn't want to get them in trouble so long as they remained harmless.
Allie and I finished our breakfast, and we went down to Potions, Allie half hiding her head under the hood of her robes. The dungeon room door was usually open, but we found it closed. On the door was a message: 'First Year Potions will be held in Dungeon Room 8 today while Dungeon Room 3 is being cleaned. Thank you, Slughorn.' It was suspicious, but the note wasn't written in James' or Sirius' handwriting. It wasn't Peter's either, and I wasn't sure who else they could have gotten to write the note, but I knew James and Sirius had done it.
We followed the directions anyway, and made our way to Dungeon Room 8. Just as I had suspected, there was a note on this door, too. 'First Year Potions will be held in Dungeon Room 5 as Dungeon Room 8 has been flooded. Thank you, Slughorn.'
I sighed and grabbed Allie's hand before she could start for Dungeon Room 5. "No, Allie," I said. "Let's just go back to the first room. This is Sirius and James again." Several classmates followed us as we went back to our original classroom, but a few others followed the directions on the note. I rolled my eyes; I was almost sorry they were falling for such an obvious prank.
The sensible group that had gone back to the first classroom stood patiently as we waited for Slughorn. Or even James and Sirius. Twenty minutes passed. No one else showed up. "You're sure we weren't supposed to follow the notes, Remus?" Allie wondered, fingering her blue hair out of boredom. "What if everyone else is in Dungeon Room 5 right now, and we're all missing class?"
At her words, a few members of our small group went down the hall to find Dungeon Room 5, and Allie gave me a look. I sighed. "Fine," I said. "We'll go to Room 5."
Allie thanked me and pulled me down the hallway. We found Dungeon Room 5, and I groaned when I saw another note on the door. This note instructed us to go to Dungeon Room 1, and Allie insisted that we check it out, just to make sure. There, not surprisingly, we found yet another note. Dungeon Room 1 led us to Dungeon Room 7, Dungeon Room 7 led us to Dungeon Room 4, and Dungeon Room 4 led us to Dungeon Room 9. I tried to turn back at this point, but Allie wanted to go on a wild goose chase rather than sit waiting for Slughorn, so we kept going.
We followed Dungeon Room 9's note to Dungeon Room 6, and Dungeon Room 6 took us to Dungeon Room 2. I was really fed up at this point, but this door was open. Our classmates were all inside. "A bit late, are we?" Slughorn wondered as we found our seats. "I know class is in a different location, but it's only one corridor over. It shouldn't have been so hard to find."
"The notes were confusing, Sir," I explained respectfully. I still felt Sirius and James had been behind this.
"Notes?" the teacher wondered. "What notes? I asked Mr. Black to inform you all about the room change, and that shouldn't have required notes. Mr. Black, did you not understand my instructions?"
"No, you were crystal clear, Sir," Sirius replied. He and James were near the front, and I could see the furious grin on James' face. "I'm not sure what Remus is talking about."
"Well, Remus, don't let it happen again," Slughorn said. "Same goes to all the rest of you late arrivals. I'll let it slide this time."
I made a face at Sirius, and Sirius just raised his eyebrows to me. I could tell he was trying not to laugh, and I couldn't believe I had fallen for it. They had really outdone themselves with this one. I had to appreciate the subtle genius of it. The real prank had come only when I didn't fall for the prank. How ironic. I rolled my eyes, deciding to let it go. Slughorn obviously wasn't upset, and I wasn't in trouble. Just embarrassed.
Now that he had his whole class, Slughorn started his lesson on Forgetfulness Potions. I took notes, which meant I didn't keep my eyes on James and Sirius. That was a mistake, because they weren't finished with their Potions Pranks, and I didn't see what they were planning. I should have guessed they would pull something else, considering they hadn't managed to fool Severus with their notes on the doors. They still needed to torture him.
We began the practical part of the lesson and Sirius got up, pretending he had forgotten an ingredient. He passed by Snape and, without the least bit of discretion, knocked all of his materials to the ground. Sirius kept walking as Snape fell to the floor, hastily trying to gather up his supplies.
Slughorn had seen the entire scene. "Black!" he commanded. "Get back there and help Snape pick up those things you so carelessly knocked over."
This had apparently been a part of Sirius' plan. "Certainly, professor," he said. He turned around on the spot and knelt down. "So sorry, Snivellus. Wasn't an accident." Snape glared at him, and Sirius just smiled back. It was obvious to me that Sirius had something more sinister on his mind, but Snape only saw a simple smirk on his tormentor's face, seemingly from yet another successful attempt at humiliating him.
"I don't need your help, Black," Severus sneered, though he was still allowing Sirius to pick up his things.
Sirius kept smiling. "Well, Slughorn is making me," he replied. "Believe me, because I wouldn't bother otherwise."
When all the ingredients were back on the table, Sirius continued to the supplies closet with a very haughty look on his face. I wasn't sure what he had done, but it couldn't have been as simple as knocking Snape's things over. He could do that any day. On their 'Mayday of Fools,' it had to have been something more.
He didn't have anything new when he emerged from the supply closet, which only added to my suspicion. Sirius took his seat again and casually bumped James' fist. They resumed working, only sparing the occasional glance up to check what Snape was doing.
Very suddenly, Snape's potion went sour. The dark green concoction quickly faded to a sickly yellow colour before it started to hiss. It boiled over and Snape jumped back to avoid getting the potion down his robes. A moment later, Snape was hopping up and down, shouting in annoyance as the potion puddled around his feet and started to melt his shoes.
Slughorn got up with a heavy grunt and meandered over to Snape's cauldron. "Ah, Snape, it would appear you've added too many beetle eyes," he reprimanded in a lecturing tone. "Look at this, class! This is exactly why you need to carefully measure out your ingredients before you add them to your potions! Sometimes, even the slightest miscalculation in amount can have dangerous results. Exactly thirteen beetle eyes are needed for this recipe, and it would appear that Snape, here, has added one more than necessary. All of you should remember that!" With a wave of his wand he vanished the yellow gunge that was beginning to congeal on the floor.
"But, Professor!" Snape argued, seeming exceptionally confused by the mishap. "I added only thirteen beetle eyes! I counted them out three times before setting them aside. I couldn't have added too many."
It seemed Slughorn hadn't heard Snape's protest, and he muttered, "No excuses. Just start over again," as he waddled away.
Snape looked mutinous, and rightly so. During the entire year, I don't think I've seen him make one mistake in Potions class. He always measures and remeasures every ingredient, to the point of obsession. I'd almost had the nerve to ask him for help at the beginning of the year, before I knew James was just as decent at Potions, and Snape was apparently someone I wasn't supposed to associate with. It seemed logical to me that his ingredients had been tampered with, and my eyes darted back to James and Sirius.
Both were struggling to keep from bursting out laughing. James was doubled over, biting his tongue. Sirius had both hands clamped tightly over his mouth and his shoulders were shaking violently. A glance at each other was all it took for them to lose it. They exploded in uncontrollable laughter, and Snape figured out what they had done just as fast as I had. Snape glared at them but got to work on repairing his potion, very wisely deciding to save his retaliation for later when there wasn't a teacher present.
"Was that James and Sirius, too?" Allie wondered beside me.
I nodded. "Yeah," I mumbled, not wanting Slughorn to hear. "When Sirius knocked over Snape's things, he threw in another beetle eye. He probably knew Snape wouldn't bother checking his ingredients again."
Allie frowned at me, like she was going to scold me for letting Sirius and James get away with their antics. But then she saw my potion, and she quickly grabbed my spoon. "Oh, Remus," she started. "You're stirring too fast. It won't heat up that way. You are rubbish at potions." I sighed and stood back, letting her fix whatever it was I had ruined.
Eventually the bell rang, which was good and bad at the same time. It was good because Allie didn't have to continue to fix the mistakes I'd made in my potion. It was bad because I knew James and Sirius still had a lot more up their sleeves. I slowly gathered my things, trying to decide whether it would be easier to tell Madam Pomfrey I was feeling peaked and hide out in the Hospital Wing for the rest of the afternoon.
"Remus," Allie scolded as we walked out of the dungeons. "I'm not going around the school with blue hair all by myself. I don't care if you really are sick. You're staying with me."
"Oh, all right," I agreed, mussing up her blue hair. She giggled and grabbed at my hand just as James and Sirius caught up to us on the stairs.
"Oy, Allie!" Sirius said, and I couldn't tell if he was mocking her or not. "That is really a lovely hair colour!" He put an arm around her shoulders and toyed with a strand of her hair. "Blue is most becoming on you."
She yanked his arm away from her. "Bugger off, you jerk!" she said, pushing him back. "I hate this hair colour, and you're the one who did this to me! Go away!"
"Oh, come off it," Sirius insisted as James started laughing. "It'll wash out by tomorrow, I promise. If it doesn't, I will turn my own hair blue so you won't be alone. James will, too."
James stopped laughing instantly. "What?" James questioned. "I'm not turning my hair."
Sirius shook his head and grabbed James on the shoulder. "Jamesy," he tried. "This is Allie we're talking about."
"Exactly," James argued. His hand had jumped to his messy hair, as if to check it was still the colour it was supposed to be. "I would understand if you wanted me to turn my hair blue for Piper. She's your girlfriend. Allie isn't, so I don't see why you're so concerned. Unless . . . You are still with Piper, right? You aren't broken up and trying to move on to Allie?"
Sirius half shrugged, half nodded while Allie and I looked between the two of them, slightly confused. "Yeah, I'm still with Piper," he said dismissively. "But that's not the point." He looked at Allie, as if trying to assure her he would convince James. "The point is these pranks aren't supposed to last longer than today. If we've turned Allie's hair blue for a while, the least we could do is turn our hair blue, too."
James shook his head with conviction. "I can't do that, Sirius."
"You said yourself that it will wash out," Sirius reasoned, becoming impatient. "You know you won't really have to dye your hair, so just promise you will already, and make her feel better. Unless you're telling me the stuff you put in her shampoo doesn't wash out right away." Sirius raised his eyebrows, and I could see there was a bit of worry behind his eyes.
Allie's mouth fell open in horror at James' silence. I took a step back, recognizing danger when I saw it. She let out a yelp and grabbed her head. "If my hair is still blue tomorrow, I don't care what I have to do!" she shouted, and they both froze. "But both of you will be bald! Whether I have to shave it or bewitch it off, you will have no hair if mine is still blue!" With that said, she ran up the stairs.
"It might not wash out?" I demanded. "What's the matter with you two?" They opened and closed their mouths soundlessly, seemingly unable to answer me. I gave them both incredulous looks and rolled my eyes before rushing to catch up with her.
She had run to the entrance hall, hiding in a corner with her robes pulled over her head. She wouldn't turn around even when I put a hand on her shoulder. I sighed. "Are you okay?"
"No." I could barely hear her from under her robes, but I knew she was crying from the way her shoulders shook and the hitch in her voice. "I'm not okay, Remus. My hair is blue and it's stuck that way. I could get through today with blue hair because I thought it would wash out by tomorrow. But because of those idiots, it won't wash out. I can't keep walking around school with blue hair! I just can't!"
Impulsively, I wrapped my arms around her. Looking back on that moment, it was incredible I managed to form a coherent sentence with her so close to me. Even though it was blue, her hair still smelled like blackberries and I could hardly focus. "Well if it doesn't wash out, I will personally help you shave their heads," I promised. "And . . . if you want . . . we can go to Madam Pomfrey now. Blue hair isn't really an injury, but maybe she can do something."
"I'd like that," Allie mumbled into my shoulder.
It was lunch time, so we went up to the Hospital Wing without worrying about being late for our next class. I took Allie's hand and led her up the familiar stairs, where Madam Pomfrey greeted us with a welcoming smile. "Mr. Lupin," she said happily. "How are you feeling today? Is your wrist still . . .?" But she trailed off when I widened my eyes at her, not wanting her to say anything about my condition. Allie didn't need to hear about that.
"I'm fine, nurse," I said. "But someone put something in Allie's shampoo. She doesn't know if it will wash out, and I was wondering if there's anything you can do."
Switching her focus to Allie, the nurse stepped towards her and examined a strand of the blue hair. "Yes, I think this will wash out," Madam Pomfrey assured. I saw Allie's shoulders relax at these words. "It'll take some magical shampoo but, Miss Bond, your hair will be back to normal before lunch is over. Thank you, Mr. Lupin. I'll send her back when she is no longer blue."
Allie nodded, looking relieved. Smiling, the nurse took out her wand and led Allie to the other side of the room. I trusted Madam Pomfrey, so I left the Hospital Wing and went back downstairs for lunch. James and Sirius were in the Great Hall with food piled on their plates, looking positively unfazed. Peter had joined them but was stuffing food in his face, unaware of anything around him besides lunch. "Where's Allie?" James asked when I sat down. He didn't really sound concerned.
"Madam Pomfrey is magically removing the blue from her hair," I explained, trying to make them feel guilty. "I had to try something because Allie was practically in hysterics. Lucky the nurse knew what to do. Allie should be back in time for History of Magic."
Sirius grinned. "See?" he implored. "It was completely removable. She can't be angry with us anymore."
"Oh, I think she can," I said, grabbing my own plate of food. "She'll probably be upset with you two for a long time. I mean, really. Both of you would cry if someone turned your hair blue, and don't try to deny it."
Sirius shrugged. "I guess—" He stopped short at the sound of several angry voices from across the Hall. A wide grin spread across his face and he looked excitedly over to James. "Oh, yes!" he exclaimed. "I told you they'd do it!"
"Mate, I'm sorry I doubted you!" James cried, jumping up to see the angry voices. Sirius jumped up too and, very reluctantly, I turned around. I didn't want to see what else they could have done, but curiosity got the better of me, especially when Peter looked around, dropped his fork, and started squealing with laughter.
On the other side of the Great Hall, all of the Slytherins were looking very angry. Most of them had stood and were holding their plates out as they shouted at the teacher's table. Several others were spitting out bites of food on the ground, and others still were crawling on the Slytherin table, hastily examining the platters of food. I wasn't sure why, until I actually focused on what they were showing the teachers. The carrots were mostly green, and the spinach was yellowing. A good section of the roast beef had apparently dissolved.
Each and every dish of food on the Slytherin table was rotten.
"Now how did you manage that?" I questioned, feeling oddly impressed.
"I've already told you," James explained. His mouth seemed to be etched in a permanent sort of grin. "The kitchen elves will cook up anything if you're nice to them. I was sure there would be rules against it, but no! They gave the Slytherins all the rotten leftovers from last week!"
I was glad I wasn't a Slytherin in that moment. One of the teachers vanished the rotting food from the table, and they all had to wait while another teacher went down to the kitchens to see what had gone wrong. It was at least fifteen minutes before the Slytherins had edible food in front of them.
Most of the Hall was laughing, so James and Sirius didn't look too suspicious when the teacher came back from the kitchens. Unfortunately, that teacher had been McGonagall, and all the inconspicuous laughter in the world couldn't save them from a house elf's testimony. Quite angry, she stepped over and grabbed each of them by the necks. "One of the elves in the kitchen has given me very accurate description of you, James Potter," McGonagall explained. "She said you were the one who asked them to send the Slytherins rotten food. And another elf had a vague description of your sidekick: 'A boy with longer hair,' he said, and I can only assume it was Mr. Black, here, considering you two are joined at the hip."
"They called Sirius the sidekick?" James wondered, laughing. "Brilliant!"
"I am no sidekick!" Sirius challenged, but he seemed happy about getting caught. "What do you say, then, mum? Ten points from Gryffindor, and a detention each? What do you think?"
McGonagall's mouth went very thin. "That sounds reasonable," she said carefully. "But why don't we make it two detentions, hm? And ten points each."
James opened his mouth to object, but Sirius jabbed him in the ribs. "Watch it," he warned, because Sirius didn't want to get in any more trouble. So far, this was the only prank they had gotten caught committing, and he didn't want McGonagall to ask any more questions.
"Yes, Professor," they consented together.
McGonagall was satisfied with their punishment and she walked away, shaking her head in annoyance. Sirius waited until she was out of earshot before he spoke up again. "I wonder if the elves told her we asked them to send the Slytherins no food tomorrow. I notice she didn't mention it." He was grinning, despite the double detention.
"If they didn't, then you're just going to get in even more trouble tomorrow," I guessed. Both of them just stared at me, as if to wonder why getting in more trouble would be a hindrance. "I don't suppose the pranks are finished with, then?" I asked instead when they continued in their silence. "Or is there still more?"
At this, James grinned. "Remus, the day is only half over," he informed. "That means we still have half the day left for pranks. I was still hoping to get Evans. And maybe even Piper, if Sirius will let me."
"Oh, certainly," Sirius agreed. "Might as well learn if she's got a sense of humor now. I can't date a girl who can't laugh at herself."
"Good," James said, "because I would have done it without your permission anyway." They grinned at each other and almost started to explain what else they had planned for the day, but Allie strolled over to where we were sitting and and took a seat next to me. Her hair was no longer blue, but she still looked angry.
"I'm still shaving both your heads," she declared promptly, getting herself a plate of food.
"Allie, you know we only got you because we think of you as part of our group," Sirius said, grinning at her. "We knew you could handle it."
Allie glowered at them. "I don't care if I'm a part of your group, or if you're in love with me, or whyever else you did it," she complained. "Do you know what it's like to have blue hair? It's just awful! Daniella Conway called me a smurf!"
James stared at her blankly. "What's a smurf?" he questioned. "I'm going to assume it's something blue?" Sirius nodded, his expression just as lost.
Allie couldn't find the words to express her annoyance. Instead of answering them, she turned to me and pouted. "Remus, I hate them," she moaned. "Make them go away."
"I've tried," I said. "But it's impossible. They keep coming back. They're like an infestation."
"Would it help if I apologized, Allie?" Sirius said suddenly. James looked at him, surprised by his cohort's change of heart. "We really weren't trying to make you angry. It was meant to be funny, but if you didn't find it funny, then I should apologize. I am sorry."
James raised his eyebrows. "What, are we going to go around apologizing for all the pranks we've pulled?" he asked. "Are we going to say sorry to Snivellus? What's gotten into you, mate?"
"Nothing's gotten into me," Sirius argued, a funny look on his face. "And we would never apologize to Snivellus. That's ridiculous. But this is Allie. I think she deserves a bit more courtesy than sniveling Snape."
James looked at me, and I could tell he was wondering the same thing I was. What was Sirius trying to pull with this stint? Why was he apologizing to Allie? I noticed the odd way Sirius was looking at her, and I remembered the way he had been acting at the last Quidditch game.
Allie smiled. "Well, thank you Sirius," she said. "I wasn't really going to shave your head, but thank you for apologizing. Now I know that if I threaten your hair, you'll do what I want." Sirius laughed and kept his eyes on her. Allie didn't seem to notice, but I sure did. It was bothersome, and he only stopped staring at her when Piper came over. He quickly averted his eyes, almost as if he didn't want to get caught, and gladly made room for his girlfriend on the bench. His preoccupation with Allie seemed to have slipped his mind, which was fine by me.
After we were done eating, the bell rang to signal the start of afternoon classes. We all journeyed up to the History of Magic room, except for Sirius. He decided to take a detour and walk Piper to her class, so he ended up being late. Whether this was intentional or not, I cannot say; but, because he was late, he lucked into the very fortunate opportunity of being behind Professor Binns in the middle of a lecture.
Binns didn't realize the late arrival, so Sirius crept behind him to the blackboard. There hadn't been anything written on it since Binns had died, and nobody knew how long ago that had been. Sirius grabbed a stick of chalk and waved it in the air for the rest of the class to see, holding a finger to his lips to keep the rest of us quiet. He then proceeded to draw an elaborate chalk image of the Goblin Riot Binns was droning about.
As the picture formed, a few people up front started giggling. Sirius took this as incentive to keep drawing, and the image grew progressively more inaccurate. Some of the goblins were flying on unicorns, and others were wielding ridiculous items like dungbombs and boomerangs instead of swords and shields. A few were playing what appeared to be a very violent game of Quidditch.
As more and more students realized what Sirius was doing, the class grew noisier with uncontrollable giggles. Binns barely glanced up to see what was so funny. He kept reading through his notes, giving Sirius plenty of time to complete the image. When he finally finished, Sirius reached up and wrote, 'Just try to erase it, Binns!' on the very top of the board and signed his name to the bottom. Those who weren't laughing before started cracking up and Sirius took a bow, which evoked even more laughter.
Finally Binns decided to glance around. A hush fell over the classroom and Sirius froze as Binns stared at the drawing. The teacher didn't move for a long moment as he decided what to do. He knew well enough there was no way, as a ghost, he could remove the image. He couldn't hold an eraser, and he no longer had access to his wand. "Very clever, Mr. Black," Binns drawled in an annoyed tone. "Please take your seat so I can continue with the lesson."
Sniggering, Sirius found his place next to James, which was right in front of me. They both started laughing, and I still can't decide whether they planned that one out or not.
The rest of the lesson, everyone was distracted by the ridiculous image on the blackboard behind Professor Binns. If possible, the class paid even less attention than usual, and I wasn't able to take accurate notes because of the number of times Binns had to stop his lecture and get the class under control.
I don't think I've ever seen a teacher look so relieved when the bell sounded. As the class shuffled out of the room, Binns turned to hover in front of Sirius' drawing, no doubt trying to figure out the best way to get rid of it. It just wasn't possible.
"I'm going to help him," Allie said deliberately before we reached the door. "Wait for me."
I knew that was code for 'help me erase Sirius' stupid drawing,' so I followed her up to the blackboard and grabbed a rubber. Binns gave us curious looks as we wiped the board clean and curled his lip when sat the rubbers back down. "Thank you for that," he muttered awkwardly, like he wasn't used to saying the words. Allie and I smiled, but Binns didn't have anything else to say to us. He floated wearily out of the room, and I almost felt sorry for the ghost.
James and Sirius were waiting for us when we exited the room. Peter was standing with them, still buzzing from Sirius' stunt. "You know, the point of something like that is to leave it up for everyone else to enjoy," James reprimanded. "Sirius worked hard on that drawing, and now the rest of Binns' classes won't get to see it."
"That was the point of erasing it," Allie shot back. I could tell she was getting sick of their 'Mayday of Fools.' I was too. "He has a hard enough time as it is keeping a class' attention, and he doesn't need you creating more distractions."
I distinctly heard James mutter something like "spoilsport" under his breath, but Sirius seemed to agree with Allie. He nodded and apologized for not erasing the image himself. James just glared at him, not sure what had overcome Sirius' usually callous temperament. I kept quiet and led the way to the Charms room, wishing that the day would end already.
When we got to class, Allie and I opted to sit on the other side of the room. She was still upset with James and Sirius, and I didn't want to be around them while they were brandishing a wand. They found a table to sit at with Peter, and they did their best to act offended that we didn't want to sit with them as they took their seats.
Nothing too exciting happened during the actual lesson. Flitwick lectured about Severing Charms for half an hour and then instructed us to practice the charm on some parchment. It was my obvious worry that James and Sirius would use this new charm for heinous purposes the instant they mastered it, but they had something else in mind for Charms class.
They decided they were finished severing their parchment about five minutes in, so they were able to spend the remaining fifty–five minutes of practice time enacting their plan. It was actually very simple. Every time Flitwick left the front of the room to wander amongst his students, checking everyone's progress, either Sirius or James would point their wand at his desk and scoot it over about three inches towards the door. It wasn't enough to be noticed whenever Flitwick turned back around, and they were able to carry on for about twenty minutes.
When the desk was about a meter off center, Flitwick realized what was happening. He stopped and tilted his head, staring at the desk with a perplexed look on his face. Quickly, Sirius and James resumed severing their parchment, looking anywhere but at the front of the room. It was fairly obvious they were guilty, though, and Flitwick marched over to their seats. "Boys, how are your Severing Charms fairing?" he wondered.
Sirius glanced at James, who wouldn't look up. "Fine," he said, trying not to smile.
"You know, boys," Flitwick continued. There was an amused smile spreading across his tiny features. "Locomotion charms are third year magic. I won't be upset if you have performed one. Quite effectively, I might add. Very discreet."
James and Sirius grinned at each other, well aware Flitwick knew they had done it. "We don't know what you're talking about, Professor," James insisted, still grinning.
"Very well," Flitwick muttered, walking away from them. He went back to his desk and magically placed it back where it belonged, no doubt wondering why they wouldn't own up to using advanced magic. I was wondering the same thing, as Flitwick usually rewards his students for learning new charms outside of class, even if the use of these charms disrupted class time.
Only a moment later, I figured it out. If they had told him, they wouldn't have been able to continue using the charm on everything else in the room. They moved a corner plant and stuck it in front of the door. They shuffled all of the books in the bookshelf, one by one, to the floor. They sent all of the severed paper flying off other students' desk. By the time the bell rang, the class was in complete disarray.
Looking very satisfied, James and Sirius gathered their things. It was decent of them to save their messiest prank for the last class of the day. It gave Flitwick time to put his classroom back together. I was worried Allie would make me stay and help Flitwick like we had done for Binns, but the impressed look on our Charms teacher's face told me he was perfectly content to clean up the mess on his own. "Ten points to Gryffindor!" he called, taking his wand out as we maneuvered around the plant by the door. "Deny it all you like, but that was very good charm work, boys!"
Charms had been our final lesson for the day, so we started up the stairs towards the common room. "I think that one went over the best," James commented idly. "The charm worked perfectly. We got caught—but no punishment. We got rewarded for it, even. Made up for the points McGonagall took away earlier."
"Please say that's the end of it?" Allie asked hopefully, and I nodded my agreement. Peter glanced at her, clearly of a different opinion. He had been enjoying the day of mayhem.
"Dunno," Sirius mused. "We've done enough, in my opinion. But James has more victims on his list. Evans, that ruddy Quidditch captain . . . And something simple for Piper." We reached the portrait, and he gave the password to the fat lady. "I'll help him if he insists, but I am getting a bit tired."
I had the distinct impression he only gave that answer because Allie had asked him the question. If I had asked, he probably would have said something like, "There is still so much time left in the day, Remus!" I shook my head, trying not to feel suspicious, but it seemed like he had been saying things specifically to stay on her good side all day.
In the common room, Allie and I found a table to start on homework. James, Sirius, and Peter lucked into the comfy chairs by the fireplace, where they all sat chatting about the success of their day. It didn't look like they were going to cause more trouble any time soon, but I was wrong. It was peaceful in the common room for all of ten minutes, until Lily sat down unassumingly across from James. She had grown complacent and didn't think they had planned anything else. I suppose she was right, in a way, because what they did next most certainly wasn't planned.
James had the sudden impulse to shoot a severing charm at her, aiming for her hair. The blue light hit the mark and a chunk of her red hair fell to the ground. The charm must have tickled, as she reached up to brush her neck, and then she screamed, realizing what had happened. She saw strands of the severed hair on her robes and bolted out of her seat, rounding on James and Sirius. "I can't believe you!" she shrieked. "First you colour Allie's hair blue, then you cut mine off! What next? Are you going to shave Brittany's head?"
Allie and I put down our quills to watch the scene. Sirius threw his hands up defensively, and Peter's eyes darted around the room, like he was trying to find an escape route. "That one was all James' idea, I swear!" Sirius tried. He was terrified and rightly so. Lily's lopsided hair only added to the effect of her fury. It made her look slightly crazed.
"Oh, of course it was Potter," she seethed, turning to James. She grabbed the strands of hair that had collected on her robes. "Is this your way of getting me to talk to you? Chopping my hair off? This just makes me angry!"
James cautiously raised his hand. "I feel like this needs to be said," he told, much more confident than I would have thought, given the situation. "It worked. You are talking to me. It's very angry and loud talking, but it's still talking."
Lily did not appreciate the comment. She promptly slapped him across the face and stormed out of the portrait hole. I could only assume she went to Madam Pomfrey to have her hair evened out. James grinned and watched after her, holding a fist out for Sirius to bump. Sirius complied but glanced over to Allie as he did so, almost as if to make sure she didn't see him do it. Allie did see, though, and just rolled her eyes before getting back to work.
That was the last prank I witnessed. After Lily returned with her hair regrown, she took Allie away from me to complain about her hair woes in private, and I went up to the dormitory to finish my homework by myself. When James, Sirius, and Peter joined me a while later, they claimed they didn't do anything else, but who knows what else they did without supervision.
