A/N: Just keep reading. I promise things will get better. Don't quit. Just keep reading. :)


The path up the mountain is dangerous, the road is narrow in places, too narrow to truth with horses, and the path was rocky and uneven. Regina transformed the women's clothes into britches with good, strong boots, for hiking. Snow smiled appreciatively at her.

For much of the hike, Regina and Arthur linger behind, with two guards behind, keeping the king safe. They talked about childhood, and he shared his love and idolization of Merlin, which began at a young age. Regina talked about Rumplestilskin, and how he was her first magical idol, and quite a bad one at that. Arthur reached out to grab her hand, and she happily accepted.

They traveled until well after sunset. The mountain path becomes windy and cold, the lack of daylight making for a treacherous ascent up the twists and turns of the mountain.

Finally, Arthur agrees to stop for the night.

"Can you make a camp?" he asks Regina as they reach the next overlook.

He doesn't specify what she is allowed to poof into camp, so she adds as many luxuries as she can without overtaxing her magic. Fur lined tents with warm blankets and pillows, because, god, she missed pillows. She even included tents for the guards, despite the fact they looked at her like she would want to kill them, and despite the fact two of them had taken her communication device, effectively trying to take her from her son. She still owed them to return the favor, but for now, they could sleep well.

"Can your men make the fire? I don't want to overuse the magic in case I need it for later."

Arthur nods.

"I''ll be back." Regina holds her communication stone in her hand as an explanation. "Henry's calling."

She smiles and reaches for her hand, squeezing it tightly. She's not even sure why she does it, she's not a very affectionate person. At least, with near strangers. Still…

She focuses her thoughts on Henry and puts Arthur out of mind.

"How are you Henry?" Regina answers.

"Well, mom's doing pretty good today!" Henry is downright cheerful tonight, something he hasn't been in awhile. Immediately it sends up red flags. "She's actually been doing a lot better. But something did happen that has a lot of people worried."

"What happened?"

"Isaac. He escaped."

"Escaped?" She tries to keep her voice calm, tries to keep her features relaxed as and Henry nods animatedly in return.

"He was just gone from his cell one morning. No one knows what happened. I really thought that was going to make mom lose it. She told me awhile ago that you made it so she couldn't hurt Isaac, so the town is worried. But she's been okay. Said she has a plan to keep us protected."

And what a plan it was, Regina thinks. Emma has killed. She's killed Isaac, hidden the body somewhere. It's obvious. It should be obvious to Henry too, would be if his judgment wasn't clouded in the fact that Emma was his mom, and a mom who almost never lied to him.

"Mom, do you think you could undo the protection on Isaac? Since he's out of prison and we don't know what he could be up to, mom might need to use magic on him while you're away."

She keeps her expression calm. She doesn't scowl. "Yes, Henry, I'll figure something out."

"I thought you'd be more worried about him."

I never worry about the dead Regina thought, but she just smiles and said she trusts that Emma would protect Henry, that Isaac had no real power to speak of.

In a way it's a lie, and in a way it's true. Isaac has no power, as a dead person. And she still does trust Emma to protect Henry. She won't turn on him, not so fast.

Besides, letting on that she knew what had happened would only make her son worry more. But she can notify someone else who's feeling she cares less for. "Henry…. Is that Hook behind you?"

"Yeah, mom's here too, she's in the kitchen. Want to say hi?" He sounds confused, and why shouldn't he be? Hook isn't exactly her favorite person.

"Why don't you let me speak to Hook for just a second alone. Go see if your mother needs any help." Her voice held that sweet, false-stillness to it, a quality that came across saccharine and insincere to her, but it was better than sounding scared or angry.

"'Hello your majesty," Hook grabs the stone and walks with it. "How are you this fine day?"

"How is she?" Regina asks, not wanting to continue down the path of their usual banter.

"Well, she's…almost herself. It doesn't feel the same, though. She insists she's got it, handled it. In fact, it's been two days and she hasn't mentioned the dagger yet."

Regina scowls.

"I take it that's not a good sign to you?"

Regina rolls her eyes. You think?

She's almost certain that Emma is now in possession of the dagger. What's worse, Emma had probably just murdered her first victim. She's almost certain the darkness had taken over.

But luckily, she's almost certain Emma still has enough good in her to be reasoned with – for now, anyway.

"Perhaps you could try a bit harder to keep her thoughts from ever going…evil? Or dark?"

"And how exactly am I supposed to do that?"

How do you stop someone from going dark, from surrendering to evil? If she had known the answer to that question, her entire life would be quite different, wouldn't it? "You're…needy" she mused. "Ask Henry to be as needy as you. Distract her. Invent some sort of crisis for her to solve that doesn't involve killing people. Maybe Henry doesn't like any of his clothes anymore and he needs her to buy him new ones. Maybe you…want something that she has to spend considerable time providing you."

Hook chuckles cheekily at the implication and – god no, that's the last image she wants in her mind.

Regina winces distastefully. "Oh, give me a break, that's not what I meant."

"Maybe not but my mind already went there a few days ago. It's been a very pleasant distraction for us both but I can only engage that distraction so many times a day."

She shudders. "Oh god, enough. Is there anything else she could help you with?"

"Getting my hand back?"

"A surprisingly good idea." It truly is, despite the fact Hook came up with it. Regrowing and reattaching a major body part, especially a complex one, like a hand….it takes time to research. And even if Emma finds the solution fast, perfecting the magic involved to reattach it…well, that's not easy.

She says her goodnights and goodbyes to Henry after getting assurances that Neal and Roland are safe and sound.

As much as she tries to be optimistic, she knows Emma is a ticking timebomb, minutes from exploding.

Things are bad. Things are very bad. But she cannot think about that right now. She had to think about how to keep her worries from the others. If Emma finds out that Regina knows she has already surrendered to the darkness, Emma may react…violently.

Plus, what good would telling Snow or David do? They'd never believe their Emma could ever commit a bad act. They would never believe Emma could be as weak as to succumb to the same darkness that she and Rumple had succumbed to, and she wasn't in the mood to be insulted on top of everything else, not tonight.

There's food out, meat and bread, a boring but satisfying meal. There is also wine, and god, she needs wine now. Anything to dull her aching mind, anything to make it easier to talk to everyone without giving away the fact she is scared shitless for her son right now. She just needs to relax. If she can just calm down, perhaps she can figure out a solution to this mess.

Regina fills her cup high and drinks deeply, watching the fire and willing her fears to quiet.

She sees her friends walking towards her, a sense of dread filling her. She drinks deeply from her glass again, willing herself to stay calm and detached.

She hands Snow the stone, doing her best to look unaffected. "You can talk to Henry if you'd like. You have to focus, think of him really deeply, and he'll appear. He just called me."

"Are you alright?" Snow asks, and she was searching her eyes for something.

"Perfectly fine. Just exhausted. If you'll excuse me." She sounds cooler than she had hoped, and Snow seems to have picked up on her tone. And maybe she would be asking her a whole host of follow-up questions, but the woman is too distracted with the prospect of talking to Henry and Neal to bother too much.

Regina catches Robin's eye as he follows Snow and Charming, waiting for his turn to talk to Roland. He looks miserable. Perhaps it is an illness or injury, or just his residual anger and frustration at her that has him looking so pained. It doesn't feel good.

Now is the time to confide in him, tell him everything, and work out a plan.

They work well together. Though they had not been together long, they had face many obstacles together. It started during that year in the Enchanted Forest, the year when she was separated from Henry. They had worked together then, before she had realized he was her soulmate, before she let herself believe in soulmates at all. Even if all he had only offered her support, he had been there for her, and she hadn't quite realized how nice that had felt until it wasn't there anymore.

She had been alone before. For decades she had been the only one aware of passage of time in Storybrooke and she managed quite well, didn't she? She had managed well on her own when her mother left her, when Rumple left her, when Maleficent left her. This will be no different.

It would just all be easier if he stopped looking at her like that.

In that way. With that pained but ever-understanding look in his eyes that makes her worry about how dependent she had become on him, and so quickly.

So she pulls herself away from his gaze and takes another deep sip of this wine…or was it mead? She drinks deeply, searching for a solution to the Emma Problem. One that she needs no one's help to solve.

Snow and David sit beside her, murmuring nonsense about their phone call back hom. Snow mentions that Camelot has served Lily well, because she has become such a wonderful girl. Regina muttered half-hearted replies, not letting up on her drink.

Robin returns from talking to Roland, fake smile on his face. The emotion of the last few days is seeping into his voice, ruining any chance Regina may have had to relax.

Alcohol isn't helping. Sitting with her family isn't helping.

Both are making things worse.

Perhaps she can talk to Mal. The dragon didn't care much for the people of Storybrooke, but she has a soft spot for children. She will understand.

But Mal has a guard on either side of her, and Regina remembers Arthur telling her how fearful the guards are of Regina and Mal being together.

So no, seeking Mal's help would not be an option.

She gulps the drink in her hand. Drinking used to calm her, used to dull her anxiety, and why wasn't it working now?

She finds herself moving towards the now-strong fire, where Arthur sits with his guard. He dismisses the man immediately upon seeing Regina, motioning for her to sit.

"What's wrong?" Arthur asks, putting his arm around her.

Was it that obvious? She moves to grab a jug and refill her glass.

"Nothing I can't handle."

But her voice doesn't sound nearly as convincing as she would like it.

Arthur raises his eyebrows. "That bad, huh?

"I can't let them see me like this." She explains, "I don't need them….surrounding me, asking if I am okay. Not now."

Arthur nods. "Come here. Into my tent. Then they won't know you're upset. They'll just think you've gone to ravage me."

Regina can only manage a weak smile before she's in his tent, sitting down, holding her knees against her head, finally letting herself voice her emotions.

"I'm terrified." She admits, "I'm fairly certain Emma has killed, which means it's only a matter of time until she completely loses herself to darkness and I…my son…I was so stupid. I was so sure she wouldn't hurt him I put him in harm's way. He is right there. And if he sees her doing something dark, he's going to intervene, and he's going to try to stop her, and that's how people die."

She's shaking now, her words are wavering, she keeps repeating the words "stupid" and "all my fault" and Arthur is there, holding her, telling her it's ok. He's rubbing her back, telling her she can't blame herself, telling her she did her very best.

Did she? Her mind was fuzzy from the drink, emotions clouding any form of judgment, and all she wanted was a moment to not feel….this. Talking to him hadn't helped alleviate whatever burden she felt right now.

Arthur's wiping away her tears, and then he's kissing them away.

It doesn't feel right, but it feels better than what she feels now. She's familiar with the feeling. It was all she had in the way of intimacy for so long. She gives in, lets him kiss her, returning all of the passion but none of the love.

Arthur pulls back, his eyes are dark and filled with lust. "I'm sorry—" he starts, but she won't let him apologize, she kisses him back. She's used sex in this way before, to distract her from downward spiraling due to her fear, or anger, or self-loathing. It's a pleasant distraction, as far as distractions go.

But perhaps if her mind wasn't clouded by cheap mead and fear, she would have remembered that this was how the evil queen handled her uncertainty, her fears, self-doubt, and negative emotions. This is not Regina.

Arthur looks…conflicted. Almost guilty. "You're not in the best place, as much as I want to do this…."

But he doesn't push her away, she is feeding him kisses and she knows that he wants her, that he's wanted her for some time now.

"God you're beautiful" he moans into her mouth, "You have been driving me absolutely crazy since the moment I first saw you."

It is like being starving and craving a steak dinner and getting a perfectly cooked lobster instead. It was not what she craves, still it was warm and filling, and staved off the hunger.

She could indulge a little longer, just take the sex, and the orgasm, for the night.

He's too much of a gentleman to lay wandering hands on her, so she does it for him, she moves his hand over her breast, and he groans.

She's thinking of Robin now, it's guilt, but it's mixed with anger, because he had, so many times, with someone else, and never thought of her. And if he could do this with someone else, as if it didn't matter, she can too. She should be able to do this.

Arthur tugs at her shirt, peels it down to reveal the corset underneath. He groans as she takes off her shirt entirely. giving him a clear view of her body in a corset and tight, riding pants. He began to kiss the tops of her breasts, only the areas above her corset. He pulls her over his lap, so she is straddling him on the ground, her cleavage in his face, his hands on her back.

She's craving attention, and touch, and hell, sex, for days now. This is what she wants, but not who she wants it with. She pushes those thoughts out of her mind. Arthur could be who she wanted, as long as she didn't think of Robin.

"You don't have to be a gentleman," she assures, lifting his hands to her corset ties, urging him to release her from the restricting garment.

He works fast, releasing the corset so her breasts fall free into his hands. He sucks her right breast, flicking his tongue over her nipple. She moans indulgently, god, she's so sensitive there. He gives the left breast the same treatment, until she is gasping and gripping his hair and pulling his face deeper into her chest.

Her body is responding on impulse now, almost animalistically, despite the fact a voice in her head kept telling her something wasn't right.

He flips her down, so a knee is between her legs, his other knee on the side of her body, kissing her furiously. He pulls back and tries to catch her eyes. But no, she doesn't want that. There's too much he might see in her expression right now. She shuts her eyes tight, as if that will stop him from reading her too well.

She's persistent, and she is fucking rocking her hips back and forth with what appears to be intense need. But her eyes won't open.

He wants her, she knows he does, but when he draws back, she's surprised.

"Regina…" he says "Know that I have never wanted anything more but…it's not right."

Regina sits up, incredulous. "Why?" She knows this isn't right, it's absolutely wrong. But for some reason she still feels herself wanting it.

"You're hurt, you've….been drinking…." He trails off and then says it. "And I don't want you to regret this, with me."

Regina sighs in frustration, and works on putting her corset back on. "Fine."

"Do you love him?" Arthur asks, quietly. "Still?"

She groans, and shrugs. The answer is obvious. "And I hate him, all at once."

Arthur nods. "And look if you want to, when you've had some time to think, I have no problem helping you make him suffer, or get back at him. I'll offer, my whole self to you for that endeavor. But…I don't think you want to do that."

"I'm… sorry. I do find you pretty.…I mean, if there wasn't a Robin, I would have done this earlier. And, you can tell, I…"

"You're attracted to me, and you like me, and you seem to care about me." Arthur surmises "but there's something missing"

"I'm sorry." She truly is sorry. She is drawn to him in some small way, just not at the same level she's drawn to Robin. "It's so close…"

He smiles and shakes his head, drawing out a long sigh. "You should go. let me sleep this off."

It takes her a second to process the fact she was being shot down by the very man who had been unable to stop ogling her the entire journey. She thanks him – muttering something about kindness, dresses quickly and leaves the tent.

Regina makes her way to Robin. He is still eating, with the others, and his back was to Arthur's tent. Maybe he doesn't even know what just happened.

He probably doesn't, judging by how he reacts to seeing her walking towards him. He holds an arm out to her. And she shouldn't take the comfort, shouldn't, but does. She snuggles into him, feeling overwhelmingly guilty but not wanting to break the moment.

"I've missed you so much" he breathes into her ear. They have seen each other all day, but she knows what he means. Just touching, just hugging, it feels like coming home.

"You alright?" he asks in a whisper. She wonders what gives her away. Maybe it was the wine on her breath. Maybe it's just that he can understand her that he sees her in a way that few people do.

And if he knows her that well, she can at least be honest. "No I'm not alright. I need you….I need to talk alone to you."

He looks….relieved. Happy. "My tent?"

Regina bites her lip. Arthur's ever silent guards are probably getting a kick out of the musical chairs situation Regina had played between Robin and Arthur. But who really cares, at this point?

She enters his tent and laid down immediately, tears beginning to form. Robin is at her side, offering her a comforting touch, open arms to lean into.

She had meant to apologize to him, to tell him he deserved better than how she had treated him, to tell him she didn't deserve to draw his comfort and counsel in a time such as this. And yet the first words she spills are of her own damn fears.

Fears of what she thinks Emma did, what she fears Emma might now do if she has already killed. She tells him everything she had told Arthur, in a slurred, emotional voice. But unlike Arthur, Robin actually listens. Truly listens. And also unlike Arthur, he's there to remind her how strong Henry was. How good of a mother she was to raise him, how many people were there to help Henry – Belle, and the Merry Men, Hook, Granny, Ruby, so many people in town loved Henry and would protect him, would help him with whatever was needed. Regina had done the right thing. And he knew she had because he had left Roland there after thinking this all out.

It was what she needed to hear, what Arthur couldn't have told her, couldn't have known to say. Robin though, in their short time together, knew how to assure and comfort Regina without being condescending or viewing her as weak.

Robin made her feel better, soothed her worries, and she needed him. She hugged him tightly, fighting tears as her armor was gradually stripped, as she gradually unburdened herself of all her doubts and continued to soothe her.

"I should have come to you with all of this days ago," she admits, finally crying into his chest.

"I agree." Robin responds, "But this trip has been complicated. If a little bit of wine has brought you back to me, I can't say I'm upset. " It's nice, being in his arms. It's selfish, considering everything else, but it's nice.

He kisses her brow, then peppers her face with reassuring, soft kisses. And no, she doesn't deserve that right now.

"Something happened with Arthur," she says, choking back her sobs for a second.

"I don't care." But that defiant tone makes it clear that he does care. "You don't owe me anything, we are not together." His voice waivers and cracks, and Regina winces.

"It wasn't much, it was just, tonight…."

"Tonight?" Robin looks absolutely livid. She closes her eyes in shame.

"I'm sorry, I was just—"

"Regina you're upset and vulnerable and you've had a lot of wine and barely had anything to eat and…" He blows out a deep, frustrated breath. "He took advantage of you."

"No, he didn't, I did it. I was upset and worried about Emma and I needed to talk it out, and…I just wanted to feel…something." God, she's pathetic.

"When you are upset you come to me, do you understand?" He looks up at her, there's such intensity in his eyes, such conviction in his tone.

"It's not that easy." She feels weak suddenly, pathetic.

"Do you see this?" He lifts his arm and points to the lion tattoo on his wrist. "This means we're destined to be together. And maybe it's not as lovers, and maybe it's not married happily ever after, maybe it just means that we rely on one another in times of trouble, over everyone else. I helped you in the vault," he reminded her "I could have helped you here. You don't need him. You have me. You don't have to return my feelings, or feel bad about using me to feel better, I don't care. Let me take care of this. From now on."

She shook her head. "No, you don't deserve this…"

"But you expect me to come to you with my problems." He reminds her. "You already told me you were there for me, even when I tried to push you away."

"It's different" Regina says pointedly. "I know it hurt when I….when I said we couldn't be together. I hurt you. I don't get to hurt you and then rely on you. I can't burden you with me anymore, not after I already hurt you and I see how much I have, I can't…"

She's in tears, now, messy tears, her voice choked and high pitched, sniffling and probably terrible looking, but Robin doesn't seem to care. He takes her hand in both of his, rubbing his thumbs over her palms in soothing circles.

"Regina, I don't pretend I don't want more, from you. I don't pretend that it hurts to know I won't have that. But if I can't have that, I still want you in my life. I still want to be there for you, I still want you there for me. I'll take you, Regina, in whatever way you'll let me be in my life. It might hurt sometimes to be so close but not fully be…what I think we should have been. But what is worse is not having you in my life at all. We're better together. Please, come to me when you are upset. I'll do the same with you. Don't worry about sending mixed signals, or anything. Just do me this favor."

She doesn't deserve him. There is so much to say in response to this declaration, but her mind is a mess.

"I'll try." Regina whispers, her eyes already cloudy with tears. "and I want to help you in any way I ever can, and I know how much you've been through and –"

"Shhh," Robin kissed her forehead and drew her in close to him. "What's ailing me can wait, if you don't mind." It wasn't time to press him on this. And to be fair, she isn't in the right state of mind to give him the support he needs. So she nods her head and presses into him further.

"Can you sleep here tonight?" He asks hesitantly, as if he regrets the words the moment they pass his lips.

Before she can think of an answer, Robin adds, "it's just that - I do sleep better with you, as you uh, know."

If this is him asking for help, then she owes it to him. God, she will take any excuse to sleep beside him. She doesn't deserve this type of comfort, but she craves it so desperately.

She agrees to stay.

He leaves the tent, saying he is going to make a snack. She knows he's probably giving her time to change, though she ops to poof into a comfortable slip. He brings her back some bread and the water that he's no doubt lifted from the guards. He rubs arms down her side and urges her to eat and drink. It's only then she realizes he's worried about her, he's trying to keep her from getting a killer hangover.

He continues to rub her arms, and back and neck as she eats, just giving her that warm little smile. She makes a noise, almost like a purr, and that spurs him on, she thinks. He kisses her neck, strokes her arms, keeps his touches firm and soothing, but still not anywhere inappropriate.

She looks at him and offers a shy smile. God, he's attractive. And he's also….fully dressed. While she is in a little nightgown. And that doesn't seem fair, not at all. "Do you plan on sleeping in your clothes?" she asks

Robin shrugs.

"You don't have to do that. I'm not scared of you. Be comfortable." The offer isn't just made for him. The wine is wearing off, and the feeling of guilt over being with another man was getting to her. She wants him close to her.

He strips down to his briefs.

She stares at him a bit more than she should.

He's a very, very attractive man. She's sure, however,, that no matter what he looked like, she'd still find him irresistible. He is her soulmate afterall, and he is kind and generous and a wonderful, caring father.

But let's be honest. He looks the way he does, and he is very good looking.

And respectful. He's laying down next to her, so careful not to touch her, and it's very sweet, and very kind, and very much the opposite of what she wants right now.

"You can, you can…we can touch, I mean, if you want to we can… "

He gets the hint. She will not ask, won't beg him to cuddle her like an emotionally needy, clingy girlfriend as much as she might want to. And luckily, with Robin, she doesn't have to ask.

He wraps his arms around her and holds her tight against him. She snuggles into his chest. His bare skin is warm.

They fit together so perfectly it could just about make her cry. He's so great to her. And she hadn't been there for him when he needed her.

"Do you forgive me?" She asks guiltily.

"For what, love?" Robin shifts, tilts his head down and plants a kiss on her brow.

"For hurting you. For….Arthur."

"I forgive you for distancing yourself from me. I don't care what you did with Arthur. That man…I hate him. Seeing you two together has been driving me absolutely crazy with jealousy. But then I realized you had to watch me with Marian, and I was angry at myself. You didn't betray me when you laid with him. You…told me you weren't mine anymore." He kissed her neck. God she loves when he kisses her there.

"And anyway," He says, his voice a bit more steady, perhaps emboldened by the way she's responded to his touch, "You could have gone out and fucked every man in this realm and I'd make peace with it if it meant you came back into my arms and said we had another shot."

The words his her hard, have her biting back tears. She wants to be with him. She doesn't need to fuck an entire kingdom to know that. "Even if you aren't upset with me, I still feel guilty."

"Maybe because you felt like you were betraying your heart. You weren't being true to yourself. I know the feeling." His voice cracks, and she realizes he's speaking about what just happened with Zelena.

She strokes his cheek with her thumb, softly, and lovingly. She could ignore this discussion, and wait until they get back, or she could have it now.

Before they started this journey, she had asked they remain friends. She had begged him to just not push or talk about Zelena during this time, so she could keep her emotions in check and thoughts on Camelot instead of being tormented with memories of Zelena.

But frankly, Robin needs to talk. Or at least…it seems like he has to talk. So she will let him.

"You felt like that…with her?"

She looks up at him, watches how he swallows heavy and struggles to respond. Then he draws her into a tight hug, but still says nothing.

They hug for several seconds, until she starts to worry.

"Robin?" she asks, pushing out of the hug to look at him, to make sure he's alright.

"Every night." His eyes are wet with tears, his voice is wavering. "I felt like that every night I was with her. That whole time."

Oh.

It hadn't looked that way, not when she was able to view those memories Zelena recorded. But she doesn't doubt he is telling the truth. He sounds so sincere.

"Oh Robin, I am so, so sorry."

Her apologies are interrupted, however, because Robin is talking now, and he needs to get this out, she can tell. He tells her much he had missed her, how he was never happier than he was when he was with her, how wrong it all felt when he was with Zelena, how hard he tried to love her, and what a fool he feels like now.

Something washes over her, a new type of understanding, one she didn't have before. Those memories she had viewed may have looked real, and they may have cut deep, but what he's telling her now is true. She knows it is.

"I was a horrible liar," he admits, cradling her head against her chest. "Everything I said and did for those months, I just ruined and hurt everyone by living that lie over and over."

They lie in silence, hugging for a bit.

"Forgive me." he pleads, echoing her previous request.

"I never blamed you for any of this."

"Please forgive me." He urges.

"There's nothing to forgive." She repeats.

"Regina…"

"She did something irreparable to you. You're the real victim. But I can't stop myself from hurting over you and Zelena, I want to stop hurting over it, though. I wish I could get over all of this. Tell me you understand, and that you don't blame yourself." He strokes her cheek but does not reply. "Robin, tell me."

Robin sighs. "Alright, I do. We will get through this. And we'll be stronger for it. But we will take it slow, ok?"

Regina looks up at him in awe, at the man who had lost everything who had been through so much turmoil, the man who is now comforting her when he had no right to be a functioning human being after all the crap he had been put through by her own sister. Yet Robin remains so loving, so concerned about her feelings. She will never be able to repay him for this.

Regina wants him in that moment, wants to draw his lips to hers and feel him, to be with him again, to tell him that she really does believe, at this very moment, that they will get through this. But she ruined the ability to act on these feelings when she kissed Arthur. She couldn't kiss Robin tonight.

She doesn't respond to him, doesn't say a word. Just nods and presses a kiss to his hand.

They just lie side-by-side, caressing one another as they just take it all in.

"Uncle." Robin blurts out after a few moments.

Well that's a random word to say out of nowhere.

"Hmm?" Regina asks

"I'm conceding defeat. Isn't that what you are supposed to say when you give up? Henry taught me. I have to know….I won't be mad and I won't stop loving you either way. What happened with Arthur?"

Oh.

Regina winces "I was...upset... about Henry and Emma, I was worried…"

Robin smiles bitterly, he doesn't need to know the circumstances of how, he just wants to know how much. "I know how it started, Regina."

"So at first it was just hugging, and then kissing my…tears" she realizes how gentle and romantic it sounded, even if it didn't feel that way. She saw Robin roll his eyes and held her breath, waiting for a fight.

"And then, kissing… and then, we got partially undressed – just the top parts… and then we stopped."

"He took your clothes off?" His body goes tense. He definitely doesn't want to know the answer to this, but she's through hiding things with him.

She shrugs. "As I said, not everything. But yes."

He looks absolutely miserable, and a little angry, and she winces when meets his disdainful look. He catches the stare and immediately apologizes. "I'm not trying to make you guilty. I just wanted to know. Although…now I kind of wish I hadn't." He sits up, grimacing. "Because now I'm picturing it."

She knows where he is coming from. It's one thing to assume something had happened. Quite another to have it confirmed.

Regina rises to sit next to him. "I know, I know how that feels…." Robin gives her an understanding nod and pats her shoulder.

"So with Arthur. You never touched…" And Regina can tell that he doesn't really want to know, unless the answer is no. He stops mid-sentence and just looks at her, hoping she'll realize she doesn't have to answer.

"Below the belt? No Robin," She shakes her head, cupping his face. "No no no."

He breathes a sigh of relief and Regina laughs into it, though her mind wanders to Zelena, to how she wishes he had also not ventured any further with her sister. The circumstances were different, oh so different, but she still wished it.

"It wouldn't have changed anything if you did." Robin offers, perhaps realizing where her mind just went.

"I don't understand why you aren't upset at me right now." She responds, looking into his eyes.

"The same reason you weren't upset at me when you found out about Zelena." He shrugs plainly, as if it were completely the same thing. But it wasn't. Not even close.

"That was different. That was your wife. And I told you…you had to leave me."

"You told me you had to leave me this time too." Robin reminds.

Regina shakes her head. "But I was the one who ended things. You didn't want to. It's different. I shouldn't have been letting him kiss me. At least no…with you close by."

He rolls his eyes. "I can handle all that. I did worry that you had fallen in love with him, though." Robin concedes softly. It's an unspoken question, one she is happy to answer.

"I didn't." Regina says honesly, "He's…not for me."

What she meant was He's not my soulmate but she wasn't ready to go there. Instead she opened the wound, if only partially, to admit, in somewhat of a cheeky tone - "You can rest assured that I'll never feel for anyone what I feel for you."

"And I you." Robin's words hang heavy in the air. Regina stays silent. She doesn't want to get into her own insecurities and doubts. Not now.

"And I," Robin adds, grabbing her tightly "Will spend as long as it takes convincing you of that." He rolls her onto her back, and then pins her to the bedding, grabbing her wrists and placing them above her head. "Even if it takes the rest of my life."

He's cute and cocky and confident in this moment, and it's wonderful.

He steals a kiss from her then, a gentle peck against the small smile her lips had formed, and then set her free, laying beside her.

She turns and snuggles in his arms and concentrated on his heart and breath and closeness, everything about him that made her heart and stomach flutter, and she feels so nice and warm.

Regina falls into a deep, comfortable sleep within minutes of being in his arms. They have more to talk about, at least if she is going to be his lover again, but in those moments before she drifts, Regina can't imagine a life as good as one where she gets to lie in Robin's arms.