~The Daily Crab~


29-Aug-2013

Talking toys actually freak everyone out

THE Politically Correct Society who campaign against prejudices against many people of the world have claimed that there can be no help for prejudices towards automated toys.

The society who visit schools in the world hoping to teach children not to be complete jackasses to those people who are in minority groups; have said that automated toys are not included in their teachings due to the fact that they're man made and totally creepy.

Many automated toys in the world are taking to campaigning for their toy rights, with a march said to be taking place in San Faldo next month. Their main message being that they want to be treated equally as humans, many believe is just completely ridiculous and laughable.

Professor Clover of the Tree of Knowledge said: "The very idea of talking toys is great and magical in our imaginations but in reality talking automated toys are very sinister and the stuff of nightmares".

"Older toys in particular that have not been so well maintained over the years, they may have missing limbs or a wonky eye where the glue or joints have worn, are more likely to evoke people to kick them out of their way in disgust or fear rather than stick around to be 'entertained'.

"Automated toys do have their fans though and can become a very comforting companion to many desperately lonely citizens in the world, this particularly holds true on the island of Dressrosa where the toys are very popular due to the fact that everyone else who lives there is so completely ghastly."

"To most, however, the talking toys are just disturbing and wrong with some not irrationally believing that the toys real objective is to actually want to kill all humans and take over the world."

Fan of all things terrifying, weird and cute Perona said: "Those mass manufactured automated toys are just not cute. They're always so happy and bright all the time; I can't imagine anyone who would purposefully want to be around that."

"I can actually put the dead, their spirits at least into inanimate objects, I usually choose stuffed animals; they're much cuter in my opinion. Sometimes I command my haunted teddys to interact with other people but generally other humans don't seem that interested and they tend to run away."

"If the public don't even like the toys I can make come alive which at least have a human soul, I am not surprised that the automated toys are so unpopular."