DISCLAIMER: See Chapter One.
Apologies for not updating until now. From May 19th through May 22nd, I was out of town in Jackson, MS at an event called the Trail of Honor, which honors our nation's veterans and showcases every conflict the U.S. has been involved in. I was part of an Honor Guard for the Vietnam Traveling Memorial Wall, and on May 21st I had the extreme honor of meeting on that day alone one of the last survivors of the Bataan Death March, one of the last remaining Navajo Codetalkers, two Tuskegee Airmen, and no less than FOUR Congressional Medal of Honor recipients. All in all, an awesome, very humbling experience. It's an annual event, so if you're ever in Jackson, MS around mid-May I HIGHLY recommend you check it out.
Thanks to Romulus Magnus, Lt. Cmdr. Jonathan Miller, Rolling Guy, Danny79, Zone-Meister, and Cpt. Matt Smith for reviewing!
Chapter Eleven – The Insanity of Halloween
A few days later, Avers sat in his office. It was Halloween, and there was a fleet-wide costume party that night. That meant throughout the day, his office was invaded by shipgirls trying to get their costumes approved for wear that night. Some – like DesDiv 6's costumes; Avers seriously doubted Tenryu would allow her four adorable charges to dress inappropriately – had been approved sight-unseen, but most shipgirls had to report in costume for approval.
Avers had quickly realized that his definition of 'appropriate' and that of various shipgirls differed greatly, forcing him to already add yet another rule to The List:
13) All Halloween costumes must be appropriate.
"No," he barely glanced up from his paperwork at Iku's mermaid costume.
"Oh, come on!" the submarine complained. "It's myth-accurate, and it doesn't actually show anything!"
Avers sighed. "I'm not going to veto a mermaid costume, but the top needs to be a little more sensible than that. A bikini top, at the very least."
"Ok!" Avers noted Iku agreed to that waaayyy too quickly, and decided to amend his previous statement.
"A normal bikini top, not one of the ones you're thinking of!"
"But-!" Iku started to complain,
"No buts, Iku…that's final," Avers cut her off. "So go get yourself a suitable top…I've got work to do."
By lunchtime, Avers was – as per normal, he suddenly realized - ready to tear his hair out. While most shipgirls' costumes had been fine, there were a few that he'd vetoed outright. Now, as he sat in his office sipping a Pepsi, he thought back over some of the more…adventurous costumes.
"Everything in place for tonight, sir?" Mancini and Blaskewicz had joined him for lunch, and the trio had spent the meal discussing various items of business.
Avers nodded. "In between doing paperwork, I've been saying 'yay' or 'nay' to various costumes."
"Any interesting ones?" the Training Officer wanted to know.
Avers sighed. "Submarine RO-500 came in wearing the most accurate Waffen-SS uniform I've seen outside of 1940s Berlin…that was a definite 'no'. Then Sendai came in wearing the costume of some anime ninja character that had a skirt on it so short it let everybody know she wasn't wearing underwear, so that too was a 'no'."
The two Captains laughed at his description as the Admiral continued.
"Destroyer Kiyoshimo came in wearing Musashi's rigging…how she got hold of it and managed to carry it all the way to my office I'll never know, but that was all she was able to do. After the rig collapsed on top of her she decided to find another costume to wear tonight. I've also had three shipgirls – Atago among them - come in dressed in what they would think a shipgirl version of the World War II U.S.S. Enterprise would look like. I didn't refuse that, but told them they weren't the only girls who'd thought of that costume, so at least two of them decided to change." He sighed. "I shudder to think what kind of costumes this afternoon will bring." After pausing for a sip of Pepsi, he asked, "What about the two of you? Are your costumes appropriate, or will they cause my blood pressure to spike?"
Blaskewicz told his two friends about his costume idea, and both Avers and Mancini heartily approved. "What about you, Captain?" Avers asked Mancini.
The Training Officer looked down, somewhat embarrassed.
"Well, sir, to be honest, I don't know what my costume's going to be yet. My date wanted to do couple's costumes, so I let her pick."
"You're a brave man, Captain," Avers replied. "Just out of curiosity, who's your date?"
Mancini actually blushed slightly as he mumbled, "Ashigara…we're going together as friends."
Avers was about to wish Mancini luck when there was a knock at the door.
"Another costume approval, I imagine," Avers informed his two guests, before calling towards the door, "Enter!"
Destroyer Shimakaze entered, but her costume floored all three of them.
"Are you kidding me?" Avers asked the young destroyer, as he took in her homemade Abyssal Re-class battleship costume.
"No?" Shimakaze looked surprised as she adjusted the cardboard tail she'd glued to the bottom of the hoodie she was wearing and sighed loudly. "I don't see what the problem is."
"Seriously?" Avers looked at her like she was nuts. "You don't see how bad an idea it is to stroll into a Halloween party dressed as one's mortal enemy?"
Shimakaze shook her head and Avers resisted the urge to bang his head against the surface of his desk. "Just…change, please," he murmured, and the destroyer huffed in frustration and flounced out of the room.
Avers turned to the two officers sitting in chairs in front of his desk. "See what I've been dealing with all morning?"
The two officers laughed. "What about you, Admiral?" Mancini asked. "What're you going as?"
"Well, I was going as the scariest thing I could possibly think of," Avers began, "but I don't think I could successfully pull off Michael- er, Michelle Obama. So I'll probably just put on my dress whites and go as an Admiral."
Mancini snickered at Avers' response, but Blaskewicz looked surprised. "You're not going to dress up, sir?"
Avers shrugged. "Never really saw the reason for it…I didn't go trick-or-treating as a kid, and I never went to Halloween parties as an adult."
"So now's the perfect time to dress up!" Mancini encouraged.
Avers shook his head. "I can't even think of something I'd care to go as...going as an Admiral's fine with me."
"How do I look?" Goya asked, taking in her outfit in the mirror.
"Perfect!" Iku grinned, giving her fellow B-Type submarine a thumbs-up. "You pull off the ninja look perfectly!"
Goya smiled, taking in her ninja outfit. It was standard ninja garb, the only concession to her submarine heritage being the headband was one worn by her kaiten pilots in the last days of the war. One had to keep up appearances, after all.
"Now," Iku smiled at her pupil's enthusiasm, "you look the part, and you proved you can handle the weapons in yesterday's practice session, but we need to work on your stealth. So I've got a mission for you tonight…it means you're going to miss the costume party, but which is more important to you: learning this ancient way of life, or going to some party?"
"The way of the ninja, Iku-sensei!" Goya breathed. "I will follow whatever instructions you give me!"
Iku ignored the shiver that ran up her spine when Goya said that, and tamped down her inner lewdmarine. Later, she promised herself. That comes when Goya wants to thank me for teaching her this stuff. All in good time…
"All right, then!" she smiled at Goya. "Your first task is…"
Later that afternoon, Avers felt he could finally breathe a sigh of relief. The afternoon had been fairly quiet; only a few shipgirls had come by for costume approvals, and Avers was pleased to note he'd been able to approve most of them. Now it was approaching 1630, and it was time to start wrapping things up for the day and then get his uniform ready for the party that night. His staff had already departed, and Avers was just finishing up when there was a knock at the door.
"Enter," Avers responded, bending down to put some papers into his briefcase as he heard the door open.
"Heyyy, Teitoku-des!" Kongo's cheerful voice exploded into the silence of the room.
"What can I do for you Kon…go?" Avers' voice trailed off as he beheld the fast battleship's costume.
The black jumpsuit she wore was obviously made of spandex, and it was painfully obvious Kongo had no underwear on underneath. How she'd managed to get into the outfit Avers would never know, for the damn thing looked like it had been painted on. It had a modest neckline, revealing nothing yet at the same time showing everything, and was without a doubt one of the hottest outfits he'd ever seen in his life.
"Urk…" the Admiral muttered, inwardly cursing himself for temporarily losing the power of speech.
Kongo smiled widely, apparently having gotten the reaction she wanted.
"You like my costume, Teitoku-des?" she twirled around, showing her outfit off to Avers from all angles, and the Admiral noted that the backwards view was just as incredible as the front view.
YUM! It's close to dinner time, baby…and Daddy's HUNGRY! A certain part of Avers' brain was screaming, but logic again managed to shut that part up. Speech would be good here, it reminded Avers, who shook his head and cleared his throat awkwardly.
"I thought Tama was the one going as Cat Woman," Avers joked, and Kongo giggled.
"Silly Teitoku…I'm not Cat Woman! My sisters and I are going as Charlie's Angels, desu!"
"…Oh…" Avers didn't know what to say to that. All four Kongos dressed like this…God help the male personnel at the party, he thought.
Kongo grinned as she watched her Teitoku restrain himself from grabbing her and throwing her on his desk to ravish her. He was so adorable when he was flustered, so she decided to keep him that way and not give him a moment to think.
"I wanted to come by a show you my costume, desu! I'll see you at the party, Teitoku-des!"
With a flirtatious wave, she was gone before Avers could utter a word. The Admiral plopped down in his chair, his mind racing. Did she even realize what she was doing to him? He flashed back to the Calendar Incident, going over what he'd told her to look for in a potential suitor and how she'd cheered up almost instantly.
Oh, shit.
Something clicked in his analytical brain. She was thinking you meant yourself when you gave her that speech, his brain calmly informed him. I don't believe you meant that, did you?
Of course not! Avers growled. But you see how she is…she's…
Like no other woman you've ever met, right?
Yes! She's…
"Amazing," Avers murmured. "She's completely and utterly amazing." He turned to the window and looked out at the late afternoon day as a smile came over his face.
"All right…I'll play your game," he said to himself, "by fighting fire with fire." He rose to his feet and quickly finished shutting down his office. He now knew the perfect costume for the evening.
Light cruiser Tatsuta was not happy. While she'd been touched that the girls of DesDiv 6 had asked her to be a part of their costume team, she'd quickly discovered that the costume they had for her wasn't exactly one she wanted to wear.
"Ok, I understand that we're doing group costumes," she began, "but why do I have to be Bandai the Evil Space Witch?"
"It's Bandora," the Pink Ranger replied, "and I agree…her hairstyle is by no means ladylike, is it?" She turned to her fellow Rangers. "Come on…we need to go see Captain Blaskewicz before we go to the party."
"Why do you get to order us around, Akatsuki?" the Yellow Ranger complained. "The Red Ranger is the leader, not you."
"Come on, girls…stop fighting," Tenryu admonished them, as she herded her charges out of the elevator and down the hall towards Blaskewicz's office. "Remember, the Rangers didn't fight amongst themselves."
"Khorosho," the Blue Ranger muttered as Tenryu knocked on the door.
Blaskewicz looked up as four adorable Power Rangers and the hottest Red Ranger he'd ever seen crowded into his office. He expected them to shut the door, but the Black Ranger looked out into the hall.
"Come on, Tatsuta-san," she admonished, "I'm sure Captain Blaskewicz wants to see your costume too, nanodesu."
An annoyed growl came from the hall, and the light cruiser in question slunk into the room. Upon seeing her costume, Blaskewicz was very hard-pressed not to die laughing. Tatsuta saw his struggle and gave him a black look.
"Laugh and die, sir."
"W-Wouldn't d-dream of it," Blaskewicz managed to force out. Tatsuta flounced over to the sofa and sat down.
"Aren't you going to dress up, Captain?" Akatsuki pulled off her helmet and looked up at him.
Blaskewicz nodded. "If you'll give me a minute, I'll change into my costume and head over to the party with you."
His answer seemed to please the little destroyer, for she nodded and walked over to the couch.
"Feel free to watch television," Blaskewicz told them as he ducked into the small bathroom attached to his office, "I'll be out shortly."
"Tatsuta-san, stop messing with your wig," Akatsuki admonished the light cruiser. "If you keep messing with it, you'll knock it out of place."
"Small wonder Bandito always complains she has a headache," Tatsuta griped. "This baka thing is driving me crazy."
"It's Bandora!" the four destroyers corrected.
"Whatever," the light cruiser muttered.
"Actually, we had our own version of that show in America," Blaskewicz's voice came through the bathroom door, "In the American version, Bandora was named Rita Repulsa."
Tatsuta slumped down even further. "Yeah, like that name's any better." She noticed Akatsuki getting close to the large staff that came with her costume. The little destroyer had been trying to play with it since she first laid eyes on it, and Tatsuta had taken it away from her more than once already this evening. "Akatsuki, I swear if you try and grab that staff one more time…" she trailed off, letting the threat hang.
The little destroyer in question simply blinked at her innocently and folded her hands in her lap while making a comment that real ladies did not make threats, causing Tatsuta to grit her teeth, Tenryu to giggle at her sister's annoyance, and Inazuma to babble nervously and beg the two not to fight.
"I don't think so, Bandora!" Blaskewicz sprang from the bathroom in a fully authentic Green Ranger costume. "If you want to get my fellow Rangers, you'll have to go through me first!"
Tatsuta looked thoroughly unimpressed. "Meh, too much work," she muttered.
DesDiv 6 looked ecstatic at Blaskewicz's choice of costume, and the Supply Officer noted Tenryu looked quite pleased as well. And if he wasn't mistaken, she appeared to really like the view of him in spandex.
"Everyone ready?" he asked, and the destroyers nodded. Tatsuta appeared to be the only person not showing enthusiasm.
"There's going to be alcohol there…" Blaskewicz trailed off.
The light cruiser got to her feet almost immediately. "Lead the way, Greenie," she ordered, and gestured for Blaskewicz to proceed ahead of her.
Avers walked into the commissary where the party was being held, grinning as he saw the six Power Rangers and one very unhappy Rita Repulsa in the anteroom.
"Great costumes!" he informed them, ignoring how Tatsuta and Tenryu were checking him out. "Almost makes me wish we were holding a costume contest."
The four destroyers ducked their helmet-covered heads, pleasantly embarrassed at the level of approval from their Admiral. Avers was about to continue the conversation, but he noticed Mancini and Ashigara entering the building and promptly burst out laughing.
"What?" Blaskewicz looked confused.
Avers motioned for Blaskewicz to look toward the door. The Supply Officer turned and promptly lost it as well. Mancini was wearing civilian clothes, he had a wig of wavy brown hair on his head, his skin had whitening powder on it, and he had amber-colored contacts in his eyes.
"Shoot me," he growled, and Ashigara giggled.
"A-Are you…that Edward guy from the vampire movies?" Blaskewicz gasped out.
"Again, shoot me," Mancini replied, which caused Avers and Blaskewicz to laugh even harder. By now, even Tatsuta and Tenryu were giggling.
"It's not funny!" the Training Officer snapped. "It's not funny at all!"
Avers privately begged to differ, but he decided to take pity on Mancini and let the matter drop. He bid the group a pleasant evening and walked into the main area. Tables had been set up around the room and Halloween-themed music was playing as groups of people moved around on a makeshift dance floor. There was also a large carnival area where games were set up to win various prizes and of course huge amounts of candy. Avers smiled as he saw DesDiv 6 make a beeline for that area, followed by Tenryu and Blaskewicz, while Tatsuta detached from the group and made a beeline for the makeshift bar instead. He was thinking about heading over to the games himself to give encouragement to some of the destroyers when he saw Kongo sitting alone at a table, apparently people-watching.
Showtime, he told himself, and started in that direction.
Battleship Kongo sat at the table she and her sisters had commandeered upon their arrival. Hiei had gone to see if she could help with the refreshments – her dear onee-sama just wouldn't accept the fact that cooking was not her forte – while Kirishima and Haruna had wandered over to the carnival area. Kongo didn't mind being alone; she was perfectly happy humming a little tune while doing some people-watching. And it was especially fun this evening, for there were so many interesting costumes about!
"Howdy, Miss Kongo," Avers' voice greeted her.
Kongo turned to greet him in return and whatever she was going to say died in her throat when she beheld Avers' costume.
From top to bottom, her Teitoku's outfit was – in her opinion – positively drool-inducing: form-fitting black western shirt and jeans, black suede chaps, a fancy belt with an even fancier custom-made buckle, what looked to be a pair of very expensive pointed-toe leather cowboy boots along with custom-made spurs, and topped off with a black Stetson hat.
All she found herself able to do was blush furiously and giggle like a schoolgirl.
Kongo – 2, Admiral – 1, Avers thought, smirking inwardly as he saw the fast battleship's reaction, as well as the look of pure lust in her eyes. About time it's someone other than me who's reduced to incoherence. He decided to keep her off-balance.
"Would you care to dance?" he extended his hand to her. Kongo's response was to giggle again and take his hand.
As he led the fast battleship to the dance floor and then took her in his arms, Avers was startled to realize that for the first time in a long while he actually felt content. Kongo made a happy little noise and snuggled closer; Avers clamped down on his instincts to display a 'natural male reaction' to the way her body practically molded to his, and instead pressed a feather-light kiss to the top of her head, the pressure muffled by her silky hair.
Crap…I am in sooo much trouble, he thought to himself.
The Admiral didn't see the wide smile on his dance partner's face as she felt the kiss.
Eddie Blaskewicz was nervous. The past few days, ever since he'd helped DesDiv 6 when they'd been scared by Iku, he'd come to realize that not only did the four adorable destroyers seem to gravitate toward him whenever they saw him, their 'mom-boat' was seriously hot. Only problem was, he'd never exactly been Mr. Smooth when it came to talking to beautiful women. But the four destroyers gave him an in…one that he wasn't ashamed to say he was putting to good use. And it was becoming apparent that his choosing to dress up as the Green Ranger had won him some major brownie points.
As Tatsuta had ditched them for the bar, he and Tenryu were the only adults walking through the carnival area supervising DesDiv 6 as they went crazy at the games. The group was only a quarter of the way through the festival area, and already all four of the destroyers had large bags of candy.
"You know, you can go mingle, maybe ask someone to dance," Tenryu stated as they watched the light cruiser's four charges compete at a water gun booth, where – judging by the small smile on her face – Hibiki appeared to be winning. "You don't have to stay with us."
"I don't mind," Blaskewicz replied, stopping at a balloon dart game. He paid the attendant and threw the darts, the combined points he scored winning him one of the larger prizes.
"Pick your prize," he informed the light cruiser, who blushed and picked out a stuffed dog. Blaskewicz took it from the attendant, and they continued through the carnival area, following DesDiv 6. When the destroyers stopped at another game booth, Tenryu turned to him.
"What are you doing?"
"Um…hopefully going to win you something else?" Blaskewicz wasn't sure how to answer this question; his Dad had always said honesty was the best policy, so he decided to go that route.
Tenryu shook her head. "I meant with me."
"Huh?" Now Blaskewicz was completely lost. Wasn't that strange when it came to him and the opposite sex, but still…
"I've basically got four kids to look after, Captain," the light cruiser replied. "A lot of guys would run screaming the other way when confronted with just two."
"So you're questioning if there's something wrong with me?" Blaskewicz joked, and Tenryu blushed.
"No," she replied, "I'm wondering why you're not running for the hills, too."
"The fact that you've got four kids is not an issue for me," the Supply Officer informed the light cruiser. "You and those girls go out and fight to save humanity on a regular basis. All five of you are heroes. Those girls are adorable…I couldn't object to them if I wanted to." He then got visibly nervous; Tenryu tried very hard not to think about how cute he looked. "Not to mention that their mom-boat's pretty hot, and I'd like to get to know her better."
The brilliant smile Blaskewicz got in response to his statement told him he'd said the right thing.
Light carrier Hiyo strolled back to her dorm room that she shared with her sister Junyo. She was one of those who'd been unfortunate enough to be chosen to remain on duty that night, but she didn't mind; being able to serve her country again meant making sacrifices, and if missing a Halloween party was one of those sacrifices, then so be it. Upon hearing her sister had duty that night, Junyo had decided to skip the party as well, and mentioned something about some sort of online challenge that she was going to participate in while Hiyo was on duty. Hiyo figured as long as it kept her more impetuous sister out of trouble, it was fine with her.
As she opened the door to her room, she called out, "Junyo, are you -"
But the scene that greeted her caused her to lose all power of speech. Her sister ship lay on the floor, passed out in a puddle of her own vomit, her breathing slow and erratic and her skin steadily turning an unhealthy shade of blue. A fanfic that appeared to be a collection of horrendous grammatical and spelling mistakes was visible on the screen of Junyo's laptop, while dozens of vodka bottles and what appeared to be Junyo's entire alcohol stash lay scattered around the room.
Confronted by such a sight, Hiyo did the only thing she could think of: she ran screaming from the room.
"AAAAAAAAAADMIRAAAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLL! HEEEEEEEEEEEEEELLLLLLLLLLLP!"
Avers staggered into his quarters late that night. While the party had been a resounding success, he'd been called away from it to deal with a medical emergency. He hadn't been pleased about it, either; while he normally shied away from social situations, spending the evening slow-dancing with a beautiful fast battleship – who appeared to have no objections dancing the night away in his arms – was not something he liked being pulled away from. However, in her defense, Hiyo's reason for him being called away from the party was a good one.
Junyo had alcohol poisoning. Had Hiyo not come back when she did, the fleet would've lost its first carrier and it wouldn't have been due to sinking in combat, but self-inflicted through a stupid online drinking game. Akashi had unfortunately informed Avers of this where Hiyo overheard it, and the carrier had emotionally fallen apart at the thought of how close she'd come to losing her sister ship. Now there were two carriers in the repair docks; one slowly recovering from nearly drinking herself to death and her sister ship from complete and severe emotional exhaustion. They were berthed side-by-side, and after being given a sedative, Hiyo had finally passed out holding Junyo's hand.
The party had been over for an hour by the time the situation was under control, so Avers decided to hit the rack and start over the following day. Exhausted, he removed his costume and hung it in his closet, placing the diamond-studded belt buckle back in its case on the top of his dresser, and then collapsed on his bed in Navy-issue t-shirt and boxers. His last thought before going to sleep and dreaming of scantily-clad fast battleships was the addition he was going to make to The List the following day:
14) ALL drinking games are now banned.
Goya waited for thirty minutes after the lights went out in the Admiral's bedroom before silently picking the lock on one of the front windows and slipping into the house, using the suction cups on her hands and knees to climb up to the ceiling. Her mission was simple, steal a pair of boxers and then get out without being seen. She could've done this already, but Iku-sensei had ordered her to wait until the Admiral was back in his quarters so that she could employ all her ninja skills at once. If she passed this test, then she would be a true master of invisibility.
She crawled along the ceiling through the house and into the Admiral's bedroom, realizing the easiest route to the dresser was to cross the ceiling over the bed. Steeling her nerve she began the most-treacherous part of her mission, looking down at the sleeping officer below. He apparently was having a very nice dream, judging by the soft moans he was making and the growing bulge in the sheets, and the submarine had to bite her lip to keep from giggling. However, her silent laughter immediately turned to terror when – to her horror – the Admiral suddenly awoke.
Avers cursed silently as he returned to consciousness, especially since it interrupted a very nice dream featuring himself, Kongo, and a deserted beach. He groaned as he opened his eyes, then froze as he saw the fully-decked-out ninja on his ceiling.
I have to be seeing things, he thought.
He blinked, rubbed his eyes, and then looked again. The ninja was still there, now looking distinctly nervous.
"Hi…" she trailed off in a small voice.
Personnel in three nearby buildings were awoken by a blood-curdling shriek from the Admiral's quarters, which was cut off abruptly when the ninja, startled by Avers' reaction, fell from her perch on the ceiling…inadvertently performing a suplex dive onto the Admiral's stomach.
The following morning, Avers staggered into his office. The previous evening, Goya had been hysterical, thinking she'd killed her Admiral by landing on him from the ceiling, but when Avers had shown signs of life after a few seconds, had quite eagerly told him all about how this had happened. Needless to say, Iku was now in big trouble, while Avers figured Goya was punishing herself enough with the massive self-inflicted guilt trip. Thankfully, Avers had come through the entire incident having suffered only some bruised ribs.
The Admiral sighed in relief as he sat down in his comfy chair, reaching into his desk and pulling out The List. After adding the rule he'd come up with before falling asleep the previous evening, he wrote down another he'd come up with after getting home from the emergency room:
15) For the sake of everyone's sanity, encouragement of ninja fantasies is NOT recommended.
He sat back and turned his chair to face the window. Now that Halloween was over and Japan didn't celebrate Thanksgiving, he knew it would be close to two months before another holiday reared its head to spread more chaos. He sighed in relief.
"Everything all right, sir?" Oyodo glanced up from her work upon hearing her Admiral's sigh.
"Just thinking that we've got less than two months until the insanity of Christmas," Avers replied blissfully, a small smile on his face.
Oyodo looked nervous. "Actually, sir…Christmas celebrations here last the entire month of December. We really only have little more than a month."
Avers groaned.
UP NEXT: Christmas arrives! What insanity will befall the naval base next?
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