Herald:First off...let me just say that I am so sorry for the first part of this chapter. It is purely for fun and I am meaning no disrespect. Its just that it is the result of a conversation I had at work about how women could formally take over the world (I concede that women already rule the world, or should, and I'm a guy). All I can do at this is shake my head and apologize if you don't find it funny. I've found that it has been rather polarizing among the few people I've had read this chapter when I had time (college has been a real...you know...lately).
Anyway, it looks like this may be the only chapter I'll post for a while. I get back to college Sunday, and I immidiately have a test and a term paper due within a week, then finals a little bit after, so this may be the last chapter I'll post until May, but I will see what I can do (I may have a rush update of several chapters right before I relinquish my campus computer and move off-campus for the summer, if I do, I apologize in advance for the grammer and spelling errors they will have).
Now, on with the show! Please put on your slicker and have your umbrellas ready. Commander Ikari's blood has a tendency of not getting out of clothing.
"Commander Ikari, relinquish your position as head of NERV right now." The blonde pulled the hammer back on the revolver.
"And what reason should I?" Cool as a cucumber in a freezer, Ikari sat in his seat with his hands up in his patented (and trademarked) pose.
"Because I am on my period, I'm cranky and frankly cause I feel like it."
'Shit…good reason. You don't mess with a girl on their period…much less do you ask them to prove it. Best thing to do is to give them what they want, run away for a week or so, and then send a sacrifice made of chocolate.'
"Hey Rits! Have you taken over yet? I want my crack at him, I just started."
'Oh son of a—'
"Commander, I am feeling rather…angry at the moment." Rei stepped into his office.
"Someone please give me a break!"
"Has anyone seen that baka Shinji? I really need to have a male punching bag right now!" Asuka strolled in and added to the sea of estrogen that was already filling the room.
"Now this is just getting ridiculous…" Gendo reached down to hit his Escape button when another woman appeared and stopped his hand.
"Now now Gendo…that wouldn't be nice. Besides I have a new item I need to test out and you are my guinea pig honey!" Yui smiled down from above him, holding a cattle prod her other hand.
"I'm dreaming?"
"Yep. And I saw that you've been a very naughty boy as I sifted through your memories, so I called in a few favors."
"Ho ho ho! Merry…" A shot rang out and everyone looked to Gendo, who had magically pulled a shotgun out of his desk.
"Alright, that is where I draw the line. If you are going to beat the living snot out of me, you might as well get started. I won't relinquish my position as Commander."
Every girl in the room smiled and cracked their knuckles. Well…except for Asuka, who was over in the corner trying to peek into the dead man's bag. "You killed Santa you baka!" She said after finding his wallet.
"Well we asked nicely, now its time to take over the world with force." Misato chimed as they all started pounding on him.
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The Next Morning, NERV HQ Hospital Wing, Room 307
"So Footsie, that was how I ended up with this white shock of hair."
'Footsie' looked on from the bed, unable to say much because of his body cast. Although he had to hold back the tremendous amounts of laughter that were welling up inside of him.
'Figures that the one guy on the planet that could destroy everything would be afraid of a little thing like that. I mean what's a little blood and pain every month compared to…well...child…no can't use that…hmm, well I'll think of something….eventually.'
"Did I just hear someone say that a period was nothing?"
Gendo looked up to see Lt. Ibuki at the door. "No, although I bet you five bucks that he might have thought it. He isn't even able to sense when a woman is royally pissed."
"Wow, you'd think for a guy as old and learned as he is, that he would know something about how things work when it comes to women." She bent over and looked into his eyes, the only part visible through the cast except for a tube that supplied him oxygen.
"Yeah. Why are you here though?"
"Oh! Well I need a vacation, and I can't wait. I also need the company jet, 500,000 euros and a booking for a hotel in Switzerland."
He took a moment to look at her, and finally realized that he couldn't tell if she was bluffing or not. "Very well, you get one week. No more, no less. I expect you to be back here ready to work. That means that you can't weigh a ton from all that good food!" He joked.
"Thank you sir!" She happily whistled as she exited the room. When Gendo looked down on his teacher, the question transcended words.
"Oh come on! That was just obvious. Switzerland and that much cash, either she's going there for chocolate or she's going to launch her own company. And she's too young for the latter."
Ibuki was met up with outside by her Sempai, Doctor Akagi, "So…did he give you any trouble?"
"No, although I still don't comprehend what we are doing…"
"That's ok
Pinky."
"What? Besides what are we going to be doing in
Switzerland of all places?"
"What we try to do all the time…Try and take over the world!"
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Shinji was oblivious to all that was happening outside his room (next door to 307) as he stared at Rei and held her hand. At first he had been reluctant to do so, but when he had a pang of guilt for not having been there for her.
He had tried to sort out the memories that kept popping up. Finally he had just given up at doing this because there were some that he didn't have a clue were even, he figured that these were just the memories of the Angel that had been partially absorbed into him.
'No one will tell me anything about what happened to Asuka. Rei is still in her coma. Misato's trying her best, but she just isn't the same. Father is even trying, but he just doesn't know how to be there for me. I need to get these things sorted out, but I can't.' He looked out the window to see the storm on the horizon. 'Gonna rain eventually. I'm going to open the window…some fresh air will do us both good.' Shinji sighed as he started to get up and walk slowly towards the orifice and opened it, relishing the burst of air that came in, carrying the smell of ozone from all of the lightning.
"In the face of the storm, I yell despite the wind. Even though my one voice is alone, it still professes my existence, even against that storm." The words came to Shinji's mouth as though they were a reflex. "A shadow. Even in the strongest storm, a shadow will still exist, and make its stand against the light and the evil." He understood the saying now to be that of the 12th angel, the one that was now a small fraction of his own existence.
"It's scary, isn't it?" The voice startled Shinji as his father entered the room. "Come over here and let's talk."
"Actually, I want to sit by Rei. I feel that if she knows I'm close, that maybe…maybe…she'll come back to me." Shinji slowly moved back to his place beside the girl.
"You love her, don't you?"
"I'm pretty sure I do, but then again, which part? Me before the attack? Me after Third Impact? Or me whom is an Angel and is partially related to her."
"You have a good point. Although I am surprised that you know all that you do. Do you know about your mother?"
"How she's inside Unit-01, and that she's been visiting your dreams since about a month ago, yeah. Actually it was the future you that started that one, not me or anyone else." Shinji chuckled at the memory of seeing him talk about what he had asked mother to do. Yawning, Shinji added. "She could come back and kick your butt for real if you ever pissed her off enough. And it wouldn't be just her of the present, but more akin to me."
'I'd be getting punished for things I haven't thought of yet…son of a gun…that's it; I'm siding with Yui and Shinji. At least then even if SEELE succeeds, which I doubt, I won't experience as bad of things as I would with her around.' Gendo shuddered as he imagined what she could do. 'Probably would love to see how long I could go inside a stove before calling for my mommy.'
'Thanks Gendo, I'll remember that for tonight.' Yui's voice chimed into his thoughts, causing him to twitch and groan.
"Something wrong?" Shinji said while his head rested on Rei's chest lightly, listening to her heartbeat.
"Nothing…I think your mother is just angry with me as usual."
"You know, it probably wouldn't hurt if you brought her flowers or something."
'Anything is worth a shot.' "I might just try that Shinji, thank you. And I do mean thank you, for everything that you are doing. You've been more of a son than I ever could have deserved." He moved forward and let his hand rest on his son's shoulder. "You ever need anything; you let me know, ok?"
"Yeah dad, I'll let you know." Shinji let the pain inside fall away and he did something that surprised them both. He stood up and hugged the one man that he had ever hated.
And forgave him.
"Commander! Asuka's been taken from her cell!" Misato rushed in on their tender moment, and both pulled apart for different reasons.
"By who?"/"Asuka?" The two said at the same time.
"Committee Chairman Keel. It seems that she…she has joined forces with them, being promised Shinji's love in return." Misato looked down to see that Shinji was starting to tear up.
"Shinji, tell me now what you did." Gendo stared at his son, wanting to just rip the truth out of him. This was very bad. Asuka had working knowledge of everything about NERV HQ, and all of Tokyo-3's layout. She could betray and defeat them easily if she had determined support behind her.
"I was joking about rethinking my thoughts of love for her…I swear…I need…both of them…" Shinji feel to his knees, tears starting to flow freely. "Now more than ever I need both of them…I'm trying to survive, but it's just not working…please," His eyes came up and burned into his father's soul. "Get her back. Get me back my girlfriends!"
"Shinji?" The voice was weak, but everyone turned to its source.
Rei Ayanami, pilot of Unit-00, genetic construct of Lillith and Yui Ikari, looked at them wearily from her bed.
