Disclaimer: I do not own Death Note.

A/N: This chapter would have been up sooner if I hadn't gotten sick. Sorry. Then again, it means I didn't go to school (which I can easily make up, so that's not a big problem) so I had time to type this up. …Sort of. Anyway. Enjoy this chapter, because the rest isn't as happy as this is.

Home

As soon as Mello was certain that they were out of Near's sight, he allowed himself to groan and fall onto Matt, surprising the poor redhead, and caused him to lose his balance as well, though he quickly regained it, and supported his lover.

"Are you okay, Mels?" he asked, gently coaxing the blonde into a sitting position.

"Yeah, I'm… Fine. I must have lost muscle from lack of exercise… Damn."

Mello seemed furious about it—he may have been keeping it from his voice, but Matt could read it on his face—and Matt knew it was because he had always taken great pride in his body. If he hadn't been able to win fairly to get whatever he wanted, he would take it by force.

Matt sat down beside him, allowing the blonde to lean against him. "Can you stand? Do you need to rest?"

Though it killed his pride to do so, Mello shook his head. "Can we rest for a minute?"

Matt nodded, slipping his arm around Mello, allowing the robots to fall into his lap. It was a bittersweet thing to have them back; they were a gift from his parents during his mecha-phase. He'd received them for his fifth birthday, and they were the only physical remnants of his life before.

Matt wasn't in a hurry, anyway. He'd left to be with Mello, not to go to a specific place. The sun wouldn't set for a few more hours, anyway.

But if Mello was in a hurry (and, from the way he acted about sitting down, he was), then maybe he did have a destination in mind.

Matt decided to ask. "Mels, where are we going?" He looked to the blonde, summoning up his widest, cutest pair of puppydog eyes as he leaned on Mello's shoulder, mainly doing this to improve Mello's mood, not because he wanted an answer that badly.

Mello did smile at this, and even stroked Matt's hair gently as he answered immediately, as if it were obvious.

"Home."

The word conjured up images of their old apartment, not surprisingly, but that place would have too many tainted memories for Matt.

"Are we going back… There?" Matt's voice wavered, and even if Mello hadn't still been looking at his now too-pale face, into his wide-with-fear eyes, he still would have detected the fear in his voice. That place was obviously too painful—for both of them.

Mello shook his head. Obviously, neither of them wanted to go back to that place. Mello wouldn't force Matt to go there, especially not if he didn't want to go either.

"No. We'll find somewhere new."

Matt let out a relieved sigh, and his features calmed, relaxing Mello as well. "Where will we go?"

"We'll find somewhere," he said, with a tone that implied they were done discussing this, and stood up, extending his hand down to Matt. "Let's go."

Matt picked up his robots and took Mello's hand. He allowed Mello to lead him to whatever destination he had in mind. After all, as long as he was with Mello, he didn't care a bit about where he was. His world was perfect.

They walked for hours, until they finally found their old apartment complex. It wasn't that far from Near's house, but it took them a while to get there because of Mello's need to rest. Matt tensed up when he saw the building, but Mello relaxed him by placing a hand on his shoulder.

"We're just getting your care. My bike's crashed God-knows-where, from the attack."

"I don't have my keys, I left them when I—"

"I'll go get them, then."

Matt looked at him in disbelief. "You have your keys?"

Mello smiled devilishly and shook his head. "I have other ways of getting in. It shouldn't be too difficult."

It turned out, those other ways were simply picking the lock. Matt had followed him upstairs, hoping that he would do something cool, like break the door down with his sheer force. He didn't know why he expected such a thing from the man who had barely been able to walk there, and even needing to lean on Matt's shoulder part of the way. But he picked the lock, to "conserve his strength and avoid attention." Matt thought it was dull for a break in (which it technically was) but he didn't say anything. After all, Mello was still recovering.

"You can stay out here, if you want. I'll only be a minute," Mello said, sensing Matt's apprehension.

But Matt wanted to face his fear. "No, I'll get a few things myself." It wasn't a lie. He did want to get his game systems, and clothes weren't a bad idea, either.

Twenty minutes later, they both had a suitcase—Matt had convinced Mello to pack as well—full of necessities. For Mello, that included clothes, toiletries, and not much else. He eyed the liquor in the fridge longingly—he hadn't had a drink in over a month—but looked away, knowing that he had to give it up for Matt.

"Don't worry," Matt said when he saw this, "We'll find you a new addiction. One that's better for you."

Matt's necessities included games—he'd packed all his games and systems, as well as a few laptops, even having to take up some of Mello's suitcase, much to his dismay—cigarettes, clothes, and, of course, his robots, were also added.

He looked to Mello, who sat on the couch with his legs spread, now changed into his familiar leather, so revealing that it made Matt blush deeply, twirling the keys around his index finger.

"You ready?" the blonde asked. Matt needed to look away; he really wasn't used to seeing him in leather again.

"I drive," he said confidently, holding out his hand. Mello threw the keys to him, and Matt was slightly surprised that he didn't get hit for demanding such a thing.

The place just dug up more fear, more terrible memories of the abuse, than Mello himself did. His blood stained the walls, floor… Everywhere here, and always would, no matter how hard either of them would try to get it out. It was too hard to look around and see what had happened here in such perfect, clear detail.

Matt pulled his suitcase behind him, holding the keys in his other hand. Mello followed behind him, opening the door for him as Matt stepped aside to allow him to do this.

"Thanks."

"No problem." Neither of them could think about anything other than what had happened here, and thus couldn't hold a conversation.

As they looked up at the building, after loading their suitcases in the back of Matt's car, Matt was suddenly surprised at the relief that overcame him. He was finally leaving this place behind forever. He would never come here to suffer at the hands of his lover ever again. He was leaving this terrible place behind him. But most of all, he was free from the invisible chains that had bound him to this place, that refused to allow him to forget.

"Are we leaving soon, Matt?" Mello teased. Matt didn't think he had a right to, since he was in the passenger seat, after all.

"Yeah." Without looking back again, Matt jumped into the car, shot Mello a grin—despite the blonde rolling his eyes at him, he received a smile in return—and hit the gas, glad to finally leave this place behind forever.

They drove for about half an hour, with Mello giving directions, since Matt hadn't been able to leave the house often, unless Mello told him to, until Mello told him to turn into a parking lot, and Matt did.

"A hotel? This is where we'll be, huh…? How much is this place?" Matt stared up at the building in awe. There had to be at least fifteen stories.

Mello chose not to respond to Matt's first two statements, as he was mainly talking to himself. "It won't cost us anything, with the connections I have."

Matt nodded, saying nothing more. He knew that Mello was most likely going to unleash his Mafia-boss side, and he also knew from rather painful firsthand experience that he was not to be messed with in that state.

Mello saw the look of fear on Matt's face and looked at him gently, hurt that he had still caused him pain when he had promised not to. "I won't hurt you. You know that."

Matt nodded. "Right…"

Mello sighed. Obviously, it was going to take a while longer to prove it to him. "I just have to threaten him a bit, just enough so that he lets us stay. I happen to know a few things about the manager… No hitting, I promise."

He wanted Matt to stay with him this time—forever. He was never going to get that if Matt didn't trust him not to cause him pain.

As he saw the still-nervous look on Matt's face, he sighed. "You can stay here if you don't want to see what I have to do."

Matt nodded. Even though Mello said he wouldn't hit anybody, he didn't know if he could be true to his word. He was dangerous when he had to be. And even if he managed to keep his hands to himself, the yelling and threatening alone would be enough to make Matt relive more horrible moments.

Mello exited the car and entered the building, where Matt couldn't see him. Within minutes, he knocked on the driver's side window, startling Matt out of his thoughts.

"We can stay for as long as we like." Mello grinned at Matt, then stepped out of the way so that Matt could step out of the car. They each grabbed their suitcases and walked to their room, which just so happened to be the nicest room in the entire hotel, with a view of the entire city.

When they got there, instead of looking out at the city lights, Matt laid on one of the beds (there were two, though they would only need one.) with his legs spread out seductively and a devious grin on his face.

"Hey, Mels…" he said teasingly, "I've been thinking."

Mello could tell exactly what he wanted just from the way his legs were spread and the tone he used. But Matt didn't pay attention to his expression of shock and let him know his desires anyway.

"Fuck me."

His eyes widened, though he had already known exactly what he would ask for. It wasn't a surprise, but it still came as a shock that he would want such a thing.

"Matt… I can't."

Matt hadn't let either Mello or Near inside—thankfully, since Mello wouldn't have been able to stand losing that to Near, knowing that he was trusted less than him—since the day Mello had raped him. Mello had let Matt top him each time, since it was his fault for harming Matt in the first place. And if he could give Matt something he wanted, giving up his body—and pride—didn't matter one bit. But now… Matt was ready, and he was practically begging, but Mello wasn't sure if he was ready. He just couldn't do it, after what he had done to Matt last time.

"I told you, I can't. I don't want to hurt you again." He couldn't stand the thought. Matt had left because he had been hurt so badly. He didn't trust himself this time, not with this.

"I told you, if we're ever going to put the past behind us, we need to do this." He looked up to Mello, eyes wide to express his need. He continued, almost begging at this point; he had quite a problem at this point. Mello could see, and it killed him to tell Matt no when he was in such a state.

"Trust me. Please. Do it for me."

Seeing Matt lying, so needy, so… Hot, on the bed made Mello's heart race. He couldn't deny this man his pleasure. He would be extremely careful, though. He had to be.

Mello nodded, digging through his suitcase to find the lubricant before climbing on the bed, positioning his body on top of Matt's, while keeping his weight off of him. He couldn't hurt him this time.

"I'll be gentle, I promise." He wondered whether that was for his sake or Matt's.

Matt smiled. This was so unlike Mello—it was as if he was lighting candles or something, to try to be romantic. It just wasn't like him. Who knew that Mello had a romantic side?

Matt took his time preparing Matt's body, almost hesitant to do even that, as if it would hurt him.

He stripped off Matt's shirt, planting kisses down his chest before looking up to Matt nervously as he positioned himself to thrust in. "Are you sure?" He had to make sure that Matt wanted this before he started.

He locked eyes with Mello. "Yes."

Mello nodded and took a deep breath to calm himself before he entered Matt's body with a gentle thrust, praying that he wouldn't hurt him at all. He even asked, "Are you okay? I didn't hurt you, did I?" after he was completely inside.

"Mels… I didn't even feel that. You can do it a little harder than that… Come on."

Though Mello was almost grateful that he didn't feel it, he did what Matt said and thrust in again, with a little more force behind the motion this time, yet he was still careful.

And in return, Matt let out a moan. "T-that's it…"

Matt's eyes opened briefly from the sudden motion inside him, but they closed slowly as he let out a moan from the pleasure Mello was giving him now—on purpose this time. Mello did it again, Matt's reaction relieving some of the anxiety he felt about this. He still took great care, doing his best to only please Matt, but with each of his moans, Mello's fear of hurting Matt lessened. And when he came, with a loud groan, his confidence soared as he realized he could bring the man to this state of pleasure and bliss that he was in right now, instead of bringing him pain.

Matt's body tightened around him, as if rewarding him for what he'd just done to him, and he came, rolling over beside Matt as he came down from his high.

Matt, whose breathing had already evened out—but, due to their close proximity, Mello could hear that his heartbeat was still rapid; his head rested on the redhead's chest—stroked Mello's hair and whispered, "I told you, you wouldn't hurt me. I knew you'd be amazing… I just had to prove it to you."

Mello looked up at him, as if shocked he had thought something through (though to be fair, he normally didn't; Mello did) for once. And that's when it hit him.

"You… Trusted me." It was amazing how he was so loyal to him. He'd hurt Matt so badly in the past, and yet… He trusted him to not, to make him feel good instead. He'd offered up his body, knowing he would be vulnerable, in order to prove that to Mello. In order to prove that he knew he wouldn't be hurt.

"Of course I do. I love you."

It was said immediately, in a soft voice, and Mello could have burst into tears when he saw the tender look in his eyes that proved he told the truth, but instead he buried his head in Matt's chest so he couldn't see his shining eyes, wide from disbelief, and wrapped his arms around him. "You're too good for me… But I love you, too. I just want you to know that."

He was on the verge of sobbing, of breaking into tears, from the way Matt treated him, and the way he had treated Matt. He didn't deserve this.

"I've always known," Matt said soothingly before pulling Mello closer to him and leaning down to catch his lips gently with his own. "I'm not too good for you; you're the only one I could ever be with."

"How can you be sure?" Mello asked. He needed to know that Matt actually wanted him, not just to make him happy. He couldn't let Matt stay with him if that was the only reason he was here.

With absolute certainty, he caught Mello's gaze and answered, "You're the only one I've ever loved. I've never, and I will never, feel the same about anybody else." After the words left his mouth, and before Mello could think of an answer, he pressed his lips to Mello's to kiss him passionately.

And at this perfect display off affection, Mello couldn't hold back his tears any longer. As he kissed Matt, the tears rolled down his cheeks, but neither pulled away. In fact, Matt only pulled him closer, to show that he cared, no matter what, and when he absolutely had to break apart from Mello, he drew in a quick breath before whispering in a breathy voice directly next to his ear, "I love you."

Mello shook his head, yet wrapped his arms tighter around Matt, as if he feared that he would leave.

"I… I don't deserve you." His voice wavered as he spoke, for he knew, without a doubt, that these words were true. He had beaten, burned, stabbed, and raped Matt. With that behavior, he didn't deserve anybody at all, let alone the unbelievably loyal, heavenly sweet, and devilishly sexy redhead in his arms. Yet, even with all he'd done, no matter how badly he was treated… He stayed. Matt wouldn't leave him behind.

"Well, I'm staying with you, anyway. No matter what. I promise." He rested his head on Mello's shoulder, happy to just say there, with the only sound their breathing, the only scent he could smell Mello's (without the alcohol masking it, and even smelling of sweat, he was still perfect.) and Mello's body all he could feel.

The words made Mello realize just how pure Matt's love for him was. As long as Mello was around, his whole world was perfect. Nothing could ruin it, not even Mello himself. His love would never die.

Mello needed some way to make up for his loyalty, for his unwavering passion. His idea was unpleasant to him, but… Matt had put up with too much, and his troubles were far greater than Mello's discomfort over this idea. Matt deserved far greater than this, after all. This was the very least he could do.

"When we catch Kira… We can go back to Near, if you want." The condition was to allow time to pass, in order to allow Mello's too-fresh wounds of betrayal (and his old personal grudge, which the murder attempt didn't exactly help) to heal and fade with time.

Matt's look of joy was immediate, once he realized he didn't have to leave his friend behind forever. For Mello, it would be worth it, but he would still have missed Near. It was inevitable; he was his only friend. But now he didn't have to.

"I'll be sure to work hard, then." He flashed Mello his largest grin possible and squeezed him tighter.

"I love you so much, Matt," Mello mumbled, his words muffled by Matt's body.

"Love you too, Mels." He kept one hand in Mello's hair, still pressing him close, while the other grasped a small object from under the pillow.

"Here's your new addiction," he said, before unwrapping it with his hands, now wrapped around Mello so he could keep him close, and pushed the small square of chocolate into Mello's mouth.

Mello chuckled and smiled, and after he'd swallowed it, licking away the rest from the sides of his mouth, rather sexily in Matt's opinion, he said, "Thanks, but you're my true addiction."

Mello pressed his lips to Matt's, and he swore he tasted chocolate on his breath. It was an amazing thing.

"Hey, Mels?" He grinned, playing with Mello's blonde, messy hair.

"Yeah?"

"Missed a spot," he said, licking Mello's lips to clear away a small amount of chocolate.

"Got it— Mmf…" Matt had just pulled away before Mello pressed his lips to his again, and he allowed himself to stay lost in Mello's chocolate-tasting kisses, away from all the troubles in the world.

A/N: Wow, it's been over a month since I started this. I can't believe this. I love this story. (: And if anyone was wondering why I had Mello actually not eat chocolate… This was why. I think this chapter's really cute. I have the rest written, so I guess I should upload it soon. I think the rest is… Well, you'll have to wait. (:

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