The next day at the bridge was very uneventful as I filled in for Uhura once more. After hours of sifting through static for any trace of a signal I was thoroughly bored out of my mind. My thoughts began to wander and it was no surprise that they naturally focused on Spock. He had been distant from me since last night, after our kiss really. At first I had accepted it, giddy with the thought that I could manage to make him lose his Vulcan control for a moment and knowing full well that he was probably embarrassed by such a display. It wasn't until later when I started to find it odd that he was still obstructing our bond. Surely his embarrassment had passed after a few hours. This morning when I arrived at the bridge, however, I became concerned by such an action on his part. He had yet to arrive for his shift when I wandered in and now, nearly at its end, he had yet to show up or even notify anyone as to why he was absent. I had been hoping some sort of odd signal would pop up to preoccupy my time but now with nothing left to do I couldn't help but wonder what was wrong with him. Jim had kept silent about his first officer's absence but it was easy to tell by how often he was glancing at the empty science station that he was also curious as to why its chair was void. Checking on the bond I noticed half-heartedly that it was still blocked and sighed, flipping through different channels.

Whatever was bothering Spock had to be related to our kiss. He had never reacted this way about anything before and as that was the only thing different that had happened it was the only possible reason. Why would it upset him though? Sure, he was a Vulcan, but even Vulcans showed affection at times. Given that he was half human it was no surprise that he would be more expressive with his emotions. Surely he couldn't be disappointed with it. It was a great kiss and I had been in his head while it had happened so I know he enjoyed it just as much, if not more so than I did. Yes, he had been surprised but by now he would have come up with a logical explanation as to why it happened.

At the end of my shift I handed over the controls to another communications officer and stood, walking quickly towards the lift.

"Aurelia," Jim called out, halting my steps. Swinging my arms and turning on my heels, I looked at him expectantly with raised eyebrows.

"Yes, Captain?"

"Would you please find Commander Spock? He never turned up for his shift," he said.

"Of course, sir," I said, nodding. I kept it to myself that such an action had been my intention already. Leaving, I entered the lift and pressed Spock's level. Despite our bond being obscured I could still tell he was in his quarters at the moment. Tapping my foot as the lift traveled down I sighed impatiently. Once it opened I was walking, steps sure and arms swinging with purpose. Any more momentum and I would probably have been running. Coming up to Spock's door I knocked lightly at it, folding my arms as I waited for a reply. After moments of nothing I knocked again, tilting in my head to listen closely for any sign of footsteps. The third time I knocked harder and with no response I pressed the call button on the pad beside his door. After a few moments of ringing I let out a loud breath of agitation and moved to enter the override code. Technically, I shouldn't know the code to override the system of the first officer's quarters but during one of our mind melds I had accidentally seen in floating around in Spock's subconscious. The door slid open and I walked in, hesitating a few steps in when I noticed that his rooms were dark, all of the lights turned off. Focusing on the bond I was sure that he was here but why would the lights be off? Breathing deeply, I realized the scent of incense hung heavily in the air, so heavily that I coughed and waved my hand in front of my nose before settling for covering it. Moving forward, I scanned Spock's kitchen and then living room for any signs of him, turning to the bedroom when I found none. For a moment I considered knocking but waved it off knowing that if he hadn't answered his door he wasn't likely to answer to anything else. His room was hazy from the incense, its smoke burning my eyes. Glancing around, I easily spotted him sitting opposite of his bed, back to the window as he held his eyes closed in meditation. Three sticks of incense smoldered before him along with many candles inside of the room, the ashes of many previous sticks lying scattered on the floor.

"Spock?" I asked, slowly walking up to where he sat meditating. "Spock." When he didn't reply I dropped my hand from my nose and reached out carefully to touch his shoulder. His shirt was slightly damp from sweat, I noted, as his eyelids lifted sluggishly.

"Aurelia, what is wrong?" he asked, furrowing his brows at me in confusion.

"You never showed up for your shift at the bridge so the Captain sent me to find you," I told him, kneeling down. "Are you okay? You feel warm."

"I do not feel myself. Please alert Jim that I will be unable to report to my station for a number of days."

"Okay," I said nervously. "Can you tell me why?"

"I do not feel myself," he repeated. Pressing my lips together I nodded, taking in his haggard state.

"Why don't you feel yourself?" I asked slowly.

"For personal reasons, Aurelia. It is none of your concern," he told me. Despite it being said in a kind matter his words still hurt.

"Spock, I'm your t'hy'la. You can tell me what is bothering you," I assured him. "If you don't want me to tell Jim then I won't."

"I am fine, Aurelia. Once we reach New Vulcan I will be myself again," he said flatly, closing his eyes to meditate again.

"Well, is there at least anything I can get for you?" I asked him. "Food? Tea? More incense?"

"I am fine," he repeated.

"Yeah," I sighed. "I know." Staying beside him in silence for a few moments, I stood and slowly walked out of the room, glancing over my shoulder at him in concern. He didn't so much as look up at me while I left. Leaving his quarters, I found myself chewing my lip raw. Whatever was bothering Spock he wasn't going to tell me but that it was definitely something. Thinking logical, as he always did, he had realized something. What though?

Setting off to relay Spock's message to Jim, I started thinking through the same logical steps Spock would have after his behavior in the gym yesterday. Hopefully, I could figure out the source of his severe meditation through logic just as he had.


A few days later I stood with the others that were to be beamed down to the surface of New Vulcan first, Scotty and Jim on either side of me as the captain and chief mechanic shared playful banter back and forth. Scotty had requested I accompany the first group heading down and Jim had easily agreed. Honestly, I had pushed the Scot to ask in hopes that a certain half Vulcan would also be traveling down first. After the first time I had relayed Jim's news to him I had been unable to access his rooms again despite the override codes I had pounded into the key pad. As far as I knew, he had yet to leave his quarters, staying there even during meals.

I had spent every waking hour trying to figure out why he was suddenly shutting himself off from everything and had yet to decide on any specific reason. Any idea I came up with seemed to illogical for him. So far I had settled on him being sick in some way, that much had been obvious when I had caught him in a sweat with a high fever. I had yet to determine why he would stay away from med bay, though. Whatever it was couldn't be contagious or I would be ill as well. Other than an uneasiness in my stomach and mood swings that ranged from calm to furious to even aroused. I had taken into account that I may very well be going through PMS but I still tried to keep an open mind. No matter what Spock did to block our bond there was a chance he couldn't keep out everything.

"Spock, there you are," Jim called out, leaving Scotty and I as he moved over to clap his first officer on the back. I watched closely as he asked how he was, receiving short answers from the science officer that I couldn't quite hear. He appeared fine, his skin not appearing too sweaty and his eyes were focused but he seemed tense and distant. With the final member here, we all walked onto the teleport pad. Despite my attempt, I ended up nearly opposite of Spock, having to settle for staring at the back of his head as thousands of lights began to swirl around us.

Once the ship faded away and the surface of New Vulcan appeared the group separated, each heading off to perform their own task. Quickly, I excused myself from Scotty, keeping an eye on Spock to see him doing the same with Jim. Once away from the group I jogged to catch up with Spock whose longer legs and quicker than normal strides had carried him far ahead.

"Spock!" I called out, noticing how his shoulders suddenly tensed but that he ceased his steps none the less, turning to look at me. When I was closer I slowed down, running my eyes along him for a closer inspection. "How are you feeling?"

"Better. I apologize if I worried you, Aurelia," he said curtly, giving a slight nod with his head.

"It's okay. So, um, where are you headed?" I asked, running a hand nervously through my hair as my gut began twisting again.

"I have business to handle but first I am going to verify where the crew will be residing while on New Vulcan," he told me.

"Oh, cool," I said. After a moment of uneasy silence he spoke again.

"Would you like to accompany me?" he asked somewhat stiffly.

"Yeah," I said quickly. "Uh, yes, sure, of course. Um…let's go then, shall we?" I said, quickly walking forward as I tried to settle the sudden jumpiness I felt.

"It is this way," Spock called out. Stopping mid-step I twisted on my heel, giving him an embarrassed smile before settling for walking by his side. As we walked, I found myself playing with my hair. In the heat I found myself agitated with its heavy weight on my neck and quickly twined it together in a rushed braid. "You are acting oddly," Spock mentioned. "Is it because you are nervous to be amongst Vulcans again?"

"What? Oh, yes," I said, chiding myself for having forgotten such an important fact. I had been so worried about Spock for that past few days that it had completely escaped my attention who may very well be on New Vulcan with us. Immediately, I started to scan the area around us, newly constructed buildings rising from the desert floor to tower above us. Not many Vulcans moved around but those that did were sure to notice the only two Starfleet officers walking amongst them, let alone the human girl. Now I was anxious for a whole other reason.

"Relax," Spock told me. "You will be perfectly fine." As we neared the building we would be staying at I trailed behind, watching the half Vulcan's stiff actions closely.

"I wish I could say the same," I whispered to myself before rushing to catch up.


I am SO sorry for my long absence! I don't intend for it to happen again.

God this chapter was a huge bugger! I kept getting stuck and just couldn't seem to get out of the rut I was in. I hope you enjoyed it! Chapter Twelve is already in the process of being written as well as the next chapters for my stories True Ties and The Stained Satin.

Thank you very much to everyone who has made this story a favorite or is following it. Reviews really motivated me to keep chipping away at this!

Thank you for reading!