Chapter 11

"You and Robin have to do what?" Emma practically shouted across the booth, drawing several confused and aggravated stares from the other customers inside Granny's diner. Emma, however, was oblivious to this as she gaped at Regina.

"Me, Robin, Cora, Zelena, dinner, tonight," Regina reiterated miserably, heaving yet another deep sigh of dread at the idea. Mary Margaret shook her head from next to Regina.

"But… but it's too early! I mean, how did-" Emma began to question confusedly. Regina willed the sudden flush in her cheeks to disappear. She didn't much enjoy the memory of being caught red handed by her wicked sister while she was rather passionately making out with Robin on her front porch.

"Zelena," Regina interrupted. "She caught Robin and I yesterday afternoon while we were, um, we were-"

"You were..?" Mary Margaret teased, grinning, as she knew full well what kind of thing Zelena must have seen. Regina glared at her, but the flush in her cheeks deepened.

"We might have been making out… on my front porch," Regina admitted to her two friends, sighing reluctantly as she awaited their reactions. As expected, both of them roared with laughter.

"Okay, that sucks a dick that Zelena caught you, but, Jesus, Regina, what the hell were you thinking, making out on your front porch?!" Emma snickered.

"Seriously, if you were trying to hide it from your mother and Zelena, why did you even bring Robin anywhere near your house?" Snow questioned which genuine confusion. Regina momentarily hated them both for thinking she was that stupid. Obviously, she wouldn't have brought Robin within a mile of her home if she hadn't had good reason to believe that Cora and Zelena would be detained at school.

"I was told that they would be at school until 5:30! How the hell was I supposed to know that Zelena would bail on her meeting and come home two hours early?" Regina snapped irritably, rolling her eyes.

Emma raised an eyebrow in understanding, but still continued to chuckle.

"Wait, so Zelena caught you yesterday afternoon and already told Cora? That was quick, wasn't it?" Snow mused, shaking her head at Regina's misfortunate. This comment caused Regina to take a brief moment to consider just how much she despised her sister. Then again, it was probably better that Zelena had told Cora quickly and just gotten it over with, rather than holding it over Regina's head in blackmail.

"That's Zelena for you. Not even ten minutes after Cora walked in the door, she managed to innocently slide into conversation that 'she didn't know I had started dating Robin Locksley'," Regina explained, shaking her head with annoyance.

"She is actually so obnoxious," Emma said with disgust and aggravation. Snow nodded her head in vehement agreement.

"So, what did Cora do?" Snow asked Regina sympathetically. Regina groaned.

"Immediately marched up to my room, and demanded information," Regina replied, as though this was the obvious answer.

"And what exactly did you tell her? Did you mention the part where you guys spent the night together at Killian's?" Emma smirked, raising her eyebrows suggestively. Regina glared at her.

"No, Ms. Swan, I did not. I told her that we struck up a connection through being lab partners," Regina told them. It wasn't a complete lie, after all. Regina was sure that she inevitably would have fallen for Robin anyways, even if they hadn't been lab partners, but their chemistry class had certainly sped up the process. Emma and Mary Margaret both gave snorts of derision at this explanation.

"Ah, yes, something like it was only a matter of time before you two chemistry experts noticed the chemistry between yourselves?" Emma chortled derisively. Regina rolled her eyes yet again, but couldn't deny that she certainly was giving her friends room to mock her at the moment.

"Did she believe it?" Snow asked. Regina shrugged, and made a face indicating that she was unsure.

"I guess so. But she is Cora, so I'm sure she suspects that there were other far more sinister factors that came into play, but I think she bought that chemistry class was a part of it," Regina responded. Emma nodded thoughtfully, while Snow just shrugged.

"I mean, that's not really a lie. I'm sure chemistry class did help the process along," Snow commented simply.

"I mean, the fact that, since she's Cora, and she considers me the most unattractive creature on the face of the Earth, she probably assumes that I'm putting out or something. Because, obviously, there's no other reason that anyone would be interested in me," Regina said sarcastically, rolling her eyes. Emma cracked up at this, while Mary Margaret just shook her head sadly at the tragedy that was Regina and Cora's relationship.

"Are you? You know, putting out?" Emma asked, smirking immaturely. She was obviously kidding, but Regina couldn't help rolling her eyes at the sheer impossibility of her suggestion.

"Exactly when would Robin and I find the time to have sex? We can barely even find the time to hold hands with all of you keeping us under constant surveillance!" Regina retorted pointedly, arching an eyebrow at Emma, who suddenly looked slightly guilty. Snow smirked.

"Well, you certainly managed to have some quality alone time on your front porch, didn't you?" Snow teased. Regina sighed, briefly reminiscing about how wonderful kissing Robin had been until Zelena had shown up. Regina felt that it was practically a tragedy that she and Robin now had to forfeit their Saturday night alone-time plans to have dinner with Cora. Regina didn't think she could possibly face another week like the last one, where she was permitted nothing but fleeting glances and the sparing touch from Robin.

"That was the first time we've actually kissed since the homecoming dance," Regina confessed, sighing and shaking her head at she and Robin's horrendous luck. Snow and Emma exchanged a glance of shock, and gaped at Regina.

"Seriously?! Killian and I made out four times this week, and we aren't even dating!" Emma exclaimed, her green eyes wide with surprise. Regina rolled her eyes at this. How typical.

"God, that's awful, I'm so sorry," Snow said sympathetically. Regina sighed, trying not to think too much about she and Robin's lack of physical contact as of late.

"Yes, well, thank God we now get to spend tonight with Cora and Zelena instead of alone," Regina said sarcastically. Emma and Snow both laughed.

"Do you think it'll be that awful? What do you think Cora is going to do to him?" Emma asked Regina nervously. Regina laughed a little, in spite of herself, at the way Emma thought of Cora as some kind of evil sorceress. Honestly, Regina didn't think that this comparison was horribly inaccurate.

"She probably won't be as horrible to Robin as she will be to Regina," Snow commented thoughtfully. Regina was momentarily surprised at Snow's sudden insight into Cora's strategies, since Snow was usually the one trying to justify most of Cora's awful behavior.

"I agree. I assume that she'll just… test him," Regina said slowly.

"What does that even mean?" Emma asked confusedly.

"It means that she'll probably ask him a lot of really passive aggressive things, nothing that's blatantly evil on the surface, and nothing he can directly get offended by, and see how he responds. And then, if that doesn't rile him up, she'll resort to just attacking me to see whether he comes to my rescue or not," Regina explained to Emma, sighing. She hated the thought of subjecting Robin to this awful event. As Emma had commented earlier… it was too early. Regina couldn't deny that the insecure part of her was terrified that Robin wouldn't be able to stomach Cora and Zelena, and would break up with her because of the drama. Besides, boyfriend, dinner interrogations with Daniel had been horrific enough, and that was when Regina's father had been alive… Regina could hardly even fathom what it would be like without having her father as a buffer zone.

"Out of curiosity, is Robin supposed to come to your rescue or not?" Snow asked Regina. Regina sighed again.

"Honestly, it's kind of lose-lose. If he comes to my rescue, Cora will hate him for being impolite and disrespecting her. And if he doesn't, she'll be able to poke and prod at me forever about how Robin either agrees with whatever she says, or doesn't care enough about me to defend me. There's really no right answer," Regina answered miserably. Emma grimaced.

"Which is the better option, do you think?" she asked Regina.

"Definitely Cora poking and prodding at me. I'm used to dealing with her, and I would much prefer that I be the object of her humiliation, rather than Robin," Regina answered with no hesitation. It wasn't as though Regina wasn't used to Cora's constant nitpicking and insults. Robin, on the other hand… Well, Regina was pretty sure that she would rather die than let Robin subject himself to Cora's wrath on her behalf.

"Poor Robin," Emma commented sadly, shaking her head.

"Poor Regina. How are you holding up, are you nervous?" Snow asked Regina gently, taking Regina by surprise with the sudden change of tone. Truth be told, Regina was terrified. She couldn't shake the petrifying fear that Robin was going to back out after seeing all of the baggage that she came with.

"A little," Regina answered distantly, doing what she could to downplay exactly how much. But Snow and Emma saw right through her.

"You're terrified, clearly. What are you worried about?" Snow asked. Regina sighed, and decided to just be honest with her friends for a second. She felt herself a little bit in need of comfort at the moment.

"I'm… I'm scared that he's going to bolt, and decide that it isn't worth it after he sees what being with me comes with," Regina confessed honestly. Snow and Emma exchanged a glance that Regina couldn't quite decipher. It was almost like they thought what she'd said was amusing, like both of them knew some crucial piece of information that Regina didn't.

"Yeah, I really don't think you need to worry about that," Emma scoffed, half smiling at Regina.

"Definitely not," Mary Margaret confirmed. Regina knit her eyebrows together in confusion at their certainty.

"And what makes the two of you so confident?" Regina snapped, not particularly enjoying being the one confused about her own relationship with Robin.

"Regina, just because you're somehow completely oblivious to the way that Robin looks at you, and just how much he clearly likes you, does not mean that the rest of us are," Snow answered her, laughing with Emma. Regina was becoming exceedingly tired of hearing about this alleged look that Robin was apparently always giving her. Yes, occasionally, he did give her that half smile where his deep blue eyes completely softened as they took her in, but that was only on occasion, it certainly wasn't constant. If it were, Regina undoubtedly would have had a heart attack by now.

"He doesn't look at me like anything," Regina muttered bashfully. Snow and Emma just shook their heads and rolled their eyes.

"The point is, don't worry about Robin going anywhere. But that thing where he comes to your rescue, you might need to worry about that," Emma said. Regina sighed, knowing that Emma certainly had a point with that. Regina really couldn't imagine that if Cora started attacking her, that Robin would remain silent. Unless she gave him fair warning. Robin was exceedingly noble, if nothing else. Even if she wasn't his girlfriend, Regina suspected that Robin would be the first to try and save her from Cora if the situation presented itself.

"I guess I'll just have to warn him?" Regina said unsurely, glancing back and forth between Emma and Snow for approval.

"Good luck with that," Emma said, chuckling doubtfully and raising her eyebrows.

"It'll all be okay, Regina, I promise," Snow said comfortingly, ignoring Emma, and smiling warmly at Regina. Regina prayed to God that she was right.

Prior to these cursed dinner plans with Cora, Regina did not think that there would ever be a time when she was dreading Robin's arrival. Despite Emma and Mary Margaret's comforting words, Regina could not have been more nervous if she tried. The one benefit to this was that she now had absolutely no appetite, which could potentially reduce the amount of comments that Cora made about her size. She was particularly dreading these comments tonight, as she was already feeling a little insecure all on her own. She knew that she was expected to put actual effort into her appearance for dinner, and, for some reason, Regina always felt more insecure and vulnerable when she was actually trying to look good. If she wasn't trying at all, she could justify Cora's awful comments to herself with the fact that it wasn't as though she were trying to look good in the first place. But when she really was attempting to look good and Cora insulted her, it actually did hurt, because she was trying. And Regina was trying particularly hard tonight.

She had outfitted herself in a satin, deep red, wrap top that was tied around her waist with a satin, black ribbon, tied in an unassuming bow at her left hip. And, in an attempt to keep Cora's comments about her figure to a minimum, she'd paired it with her most flattering pair of black skinny jeans, and had even taken Cora's often given advice about wearing heels to make herself appear less 'short and stocky'. She'd selected the casual, black leather heels that she'd worn to Killian's party weeks before. In addition, Regina had curled her hair into loose, dark waves that hung just to her breasts. She'd even taken special care with her makeup, adding a little more mascara here, a little more concealer there, and finishing it off with a very light coating of dark red lipstick.

And, besides, it wasn't just Cora's approval that she was after tonight. When Regina had been dating Daniel, she'd rarely ever felt the need to really try with her appearance. Daniel had found her attractive in middle school, so she'd always felt reasonably confident that he found her equally as good looking in high school (seriously, middle school Regina left a bit to be desired…). But Robin… Well, she still felt an almost embarrassing need to impress him, to give him some concrete reason as to why he'd taken an interest in her in the first place. Not to mention the fact that, subconsciously, Regina suspected that she was trying just a little bit to butter him up for the hell that Cora was sure to put him through. Maybe if she could remind him that he was attracted to her, it would give him more incentive to deal with Cora.

The overbearing, grand doorbell echoed throughout the house, snapping Regina out of her rather nerve-wracking and uncomfortable train of thought. While Cora and Zelena were in the kitchen and dining room, Regina had made a point to be standing right by the front door at the exact moment when Robin was supposed to be arriving, which was 7:00. Regina had instigated this plan so that she could covertly sneak outside and very quickly explain to Robin exactly what was going to happen at this horrific dinner before she let him in. She intended to explain to him that he needed to keep his cool when Cora, inevitably, asked disgustingly offensive questions, disguised masterfully with passive aggressive politeness and condescension. And that, when she failed to rile him up with this method, that he absolutely should not come to her rescue when Cora, also inevitably, began harassing Regina.

"I'm going to let Robin in!" Regina announced to nobody in particular, before quickly darting out the front door, and shutting it quietly behind her. She was immediately hit with a gust of frigid wind and the icy chill of the air. She really should have planned this out better. She should have just had this conversation with him beforehand, or at least she should've brought a jacket…

Robin looked perfect, as always. She'd asked him to wear dress pants and a button down shirt, but no tie, so that Cora couldn't imply that he was a slob with no manners, nor that he was trying too hard. Robin had outfitted himself in a sky blue button down dress shirt, his black slacks that fit him way too well, and black dress shoes. Regina was almost knocked off her feet by the sheer wave of simultaneous affection and attraction that hit her upon seeing him. God, how she despised Cora for ripping the possibility of a night alone with Robin away from her…

"You know, I think it's customary for the guest to be let into the house, rather than the host to come outside," Robin teased, half smiling at her. Regina's heart skipped a beat, and her stomach felt like it was utterly and completely melting. These sensations caused her to make a probably very unwise decision.

Regina felt herself grab Robin by the collar of his shirt with both of her hands, and she just kissed him. She legitimately couldn't help herself, he was too perfect. Robin, though initially surprised, responded quickly, and his hands immediately settled on either side of her waist, pulling her closer to him.

Before Regina could allow herself to be sucked into the heaven that was kissing Robin, she reminded herself of the reason that she was out here in the freezing cold with him, and that time was of the essence at the moment. It wouldn't be long before Cora and Zelena wondered where they were. So she compelled herself to pull away from him. Much to her pleasure, Robin didn't remove his hands from her body. She forced herself to focus anyways.

"Hello to you too. What was that for?" Robin mused, briefly shooting her that adoring look of his that made Regina weak in the knees. Goodness, couldn't he just not be so utterly charming for a minute so that Regina could speak?

"Repayment," Regina responded breathlessly. Robin knit his eyebrows together in bewilderment.

"I'm positive that you don't owe me anything," he responded confusedly, chuckling lightly. Regina sighed.

"Trust me, I will after this dinner," she said anxiously, crossing her arms both on instinct and to preserve warmth. Robin sighed, and stared at her deeply, seeming to sense just how worried she was. He shook his head.

"Regina, relax, everything is going to be fine. You look beautiful, by the way," Robin said gently, moving his hands upwards so that they could run up and down her arms to warm them slightly. Regina's heart melted all over again. Robin had never called her beautiful before… He'd told her that she was 'pleasant to look at', and he'd told her that she looked 'stunning' before, but never beautiful. And, for a moment, the mere idea that Robin thought she was beautiful was enough to make all of her concerns disappear.

She just grinned up at him like an idiot in response, which he seemed to understand was her wordless way of thanking him for the compliment.

"Listen, before we go in there, I have to explain to you what's going to happen and what you need to do," Regina said, having regained her composure. Robin laughed quietly.

"You make it sound like you're about to perform surgery on me," he joked, grinning. Regina wished he wouldn't be so jocular and light hearted about this.

"Robin…"

"Alright, alright I'm done. Talk to me," Robin encouraged, smiling at her in a way that she really didn't deserve. Focus, Regina…

"I don't have a lot of time to explain, but she's going to try and make you feel as inferior and uncomfortable as possible. And it's going to be the worst, but I am begging you, for your sake and for mine, that you try and remain as calm and unbothered as you possibly can," Regina explained to him, watching his face closely for signs that he might bolt as she spoke. But Robin just nodded, seemingly unsurprised by this information.

"Alright, that was to be expected. I can handle that, so if that's all that you're worried about…" Robin trailed off, smiling with relief. But, oh, Regina wasn't done.

"Actually, that's the part I wasn't as worried about… I know you can keep calm, I trust you completely on that front, but it's what happens after my mother fails to rile you up that's worrying me," Regina said slowly, trying to figure out how to word this next part. Robin looked at her confusedly. How exactly was she supposed to tell her boyfriend not to defend her?

"What do you mean?" Robin questioned. Regina sighed.

"Do you remember when we discussed things to avoid doing if we don't want to irritate one another?" Regina asked tentatively. Robin arched an eyebrow.

"Considering that it was less than a week ago, yes I do."

"Consider this one of mine. After my mother realizes that she can't phase you directly, she's going to start attacking me instead to see how you react. And I need you… not to defend me. At all," Regina tried to explain clearly. This, however, did seem to bother Robin. Much more than she'd hoped that it would.

"You mean that I should just sit there and let her insult you?" he asked in bewilderment, looking for confirmation with the look of sheer confusion that he was giving. Regina nodded immediately.

"It won't do anyone any favors if you try and rescue me," Regina said matter of factly. Robin gaped at her.

"Regina-"

"I promise you, I will not be sitting there silently waiting for you to come to my defense. I will be upset with you if you do defend me, not if you don't," Regina interrupted him, trying to end this conversation as quickly as she could.

"Regina, you can't seriously be expecting me to just sit idly by and let your mother attack-"

"That is exactly what I am expecting you to do. If you disagree with her, it'll just make her hate you for being disrespectful, and the last thing we want is for my mother to hate you," Regina explained, sighing. She took a moment to consider how truly sad it was that she was having to have this conversation with Robin in the first place. She quickly wondered what it might be like to have a normal mother, who didn't thoroughly enjoy ripping her apart and making her feel small in front of her boyfriend.

"I don't give a damn how your mother feels about me-"

"I know that, but what I'm trying to tell you is that you should. Not only is she the principal of your high school, but having Cora hate you will only make it more difficult for you and I to spend time together," Regina interrupted him. Robin considered this for a moment, and, while he seemed to be backing down a little, he didn't seem fully convinced either.

"Alright, I can understand that. Regina, I promise that I'll try, but I really don't know if I'm capable of agreeing with whatever horrible things that your mother says about you," he said doubtfully, shaking his head.

"You don't necessarily need to agree, you just need to not… disagree," Regina said slowly. Robin nodded, taking this information in.

"And you promise that you won't be upset?" Robin asked sheepishly, seeming very, very worried about this course of action. Regina's heart melted for a third time at how much the sheer idea of her being hurt seemed to bother him. She instinctively placed both of her hands on his lightly scruffy cheeks, and brought his gaze sturdily to hers.

"I promise. And I'm… I'm so sorry that you even have to deal with this at all," Regina said nervously, sighing. Robin shook his head immediately, and gently placed his hands back onto her hips.

"Worth it," he murmured, before he lightly pressed his lips to her forehead. Regina was amazed that she didn't pass out on the spot from the dizziness of feeling herself fall even harder for Robin.

Things weren't going quite as horribly as Robin had been mentally preparing himself for. They'd been seated at the table for a solid ten minutes, and things weren't too terrible yet. Robin was seated on Regina's right, while Cora was at the head of the table to Regina's left, and Zelena sat directly across from Regina.

Cora had prepared a 'simple' meal of chicken, potatoes, and vegetables, since she didn't know what kind of things that Robin 'typically' ate. Perhaps if Regina hadn't warned Robin that everything Cora said to him was going to be passive aggressive and condescending, he might not have read this to mean that she was calling him slightly lower class. But this kind of comment really didn't bother Robin, he had no trouble staying calm in situations such as these. But what did bother him was how very obviously nervous and on edge Regina was next to him. He couldn't help watching as she fidgeted uneasily, her foot constantly tapping the carpeted floor beneath them. The way that she was cutting up her food and pushing it around her plate but hardly eating it, as though afraid of what Cora would say if she did. It was almost just downright bizarre for Robin to witness Regina so… unsure of herself, so docile, so compliant and subservient. For him to see her without her biting and confident wit, and almost overwhelming intelligence. And he hated seeing her without her sense of humor, without the sparkle in her eyes when she was going to say something witty, without the air of comfort she had around her friends. For some reason, Robin couldn't get the awful mental image of a younger Regina growing up in this environment. Being constantly insulted and nitpicked by Cora, believing that she was never good enough. But, in some ways, it made the fact that Regina had turned out so utterly gorgeous and strong even more endearing.

Zelena had scarcely spoken so far, which he couldn't say that he minded. Robin took a brief second to ponder how it was possible that Zelena and Regina could even be related, let alone be sisters. While Regina's hair was as dark as a raven's, Zelena's was almost alarmingly red. While Regina's eyes were a deep chocolate brown, Zelena's were a piercing shade of emerald green. Regina's features, just in general, were overall dark, while Zelena's were completely light. Not to mention the fact that Zelena was a good five inches taller than Regina, and couldn't have had a more different body type. Though Robin certainly wasn't attracted to Zelena himself, he had to concede that she was rather pretty, in a sort of sharp and aggressive kind of way. But Robin preferred brunettes, he always had. And he had never much been attracted to the tall and beanpole thin body type, he had always been captivated by a shorter, curvier figure. This inevitably steered Robin's mind toward Regina, with her dark hair and flawless body. And the red satin top she was wearing, which so very nicely accentuated the curve of her waist. And how utterly fantastic her ass looked in her black jeans as she walked in front of him… Jesus, Robin, not the kind of thoughts to be entertaining right now…

"So, Robin, tell me, how have you been adjusting to Storybrook High so far?" Cora asked easily, snapping Robin out of his rather inappropriate dinnertime thoughts. Robin cleared his throat and took a sip of his water.

"Really well, actually. I was incredibly nervous, you know, coming all the way from England… But I've just had the best experience so far," Robin responded conversationally, smiling politely. Growing up, Robin's mother had done absolutely everything that she could to instill the best of table and conversation manners in him. And Robin intended to make her proud tonight.

"I'm just thrilled to hear that. How are your classes treating you, not too difficult, I hope?" Cora questioned, smiling condescendingly as though she expected that Robin would be struggling with his classes. Robin found this question slightly annoying, since he knew that Cora had ample access to his grades as the principal, and he knew that his grades were good.

"Nothing too horrible so far," Robin responded, smiling tightly. Cora glanced over at Regina, who was cutting up her chicken into impossibly smaller pieces.

"Well, Regina certainly leaves room for improvement in her grades, don't you, dear?" Cora said passive aggressively to Regina, who snapped her head up to give her attention to Cora. Robin momentarily forgot where they were, and instinctively expected Regina to snap back with some witty or sarcastic dig, before remembering who was insulting her. Regina flushed a little, but smiled calmly anyways.

"I've been working harder, Mother," Regina responded mechanically, as though she had this answer memorized, or was reading from a script. Robin found Cora's insult to be rather poorly timed, since Regina's grades were undoubtedly better than Robin's anyways. Cora took no notice of Regina's discomfort, and instead turned her attention to Zelena.

"Zelena is going to be the valedictorian of her class," Cora announced proudly, looking at Zelena fondly. Zelena beamed proudly, while simultaneously attempting to appear modest, with a shoulder shrug as though it were no big deal. It was obvious, however, that Zelena relished her mother's attention, especially when it involved one upping Regina. Regina, meanwhile, remained perfectly impassive and collected. Robin remembered again that this type of awful conversation was probably nothing new to her. Still, he felt compelled to help her at least a little bit.

"What even is your class rank, Regina?" Robin asked, speaking to Regina directly for the first time since they had sat down to dinner. Regina was about to respond, before Cora interrupted.

"Second. Despite her… best efforts, Regina just can't seem to surpass Mr. Gold. Isn't that right, Regina?" Cora said pointedly, arching an eyebrow to Regina. Robin momentarily ignored the terribly condescending and insulting way that Cora had just addressed Regina to be completely shocked and amused that Gold was their class valedictorian. Of all people!

"I'm sorry, Gold is our valedictorian?" Robin practically scoffed, unable to help himself. Regina relaxed a little bit, and laughed lightly.

"Always has been," Regina confirmed. "You didn't think all that evil genius went towards nothing, did you?" she added under her breath. Robin grinned.

"Well, unfortunately colleges don't care how close you are, or how hard you work, they just care about the end result," Cora commented abstractly, as though this weren't pointed directly at Regina.

"I still have two more years, Mother," Regina said calmly. Robin was fascinated with her ability to stay so cool and collected. If his father spoke to him this way, Robin would probably do everything short of punching him.

"Speaking of college, Robin, do you have any plans, aspirations?" Cora asked, shifting the attention back to Robin again. Robin really didn't mind the spotlight; anything to keep Regina out of the crossfires.

"Honestly, not at the moment. I had a few ideas when I was living back in England. But since now I'm most likely going to stay in the United States, I'm not really sure. Probably somewhere close by, so that I can be near Roland," Robin answered the question honestly. He hadn't had the time to give college any proper consideration lately. Not really since his mother had died, frankly. Now there were always a million more pressing issues demanding his attention, and he scarcely found the time to envision the future.

"Roland is your…?" Cora questioned, arching an eyebrow.

"My little brother. He's four."

"I see. Well, Robin, admirable and sentimental as wanting to remain close to your little brother may be, I'm sure he'd want you to go wherever is in your best interest," Cora said thoughtfully. It wasn't an inherently rude comment, but Robin didn't particularly like the direction the conversation was heading.

"It's not just for sentimental reasons, Mother. Robin's father has to work a lot, and Robin has practically raised Roland," Regina told her mother, seemingly also bothered by the tone that Cora was taking towards the subject of Robin's relationship with Roland. For about the 100th time this evening, Robin took a moment to revel in just how much he liked and appreciated her.

"Is your father a single parent?" Cora asked, doing very little to conceal the judgment and disapproval embedded in her question. Oh, now Robin really did not like this conversation or the woman leading it.

"Mother-" Regina began to warn, but Robin had no intention of letting Regina be scolded for defending him.

"My mother passed away two years ago," Robin said matter of factly, hoping to make Cora feel like as much of an asshole as possible. But, of course, the woman lacked all sense of common decency, and therefore this proved impossible. She didn't appear even slightly embarrassed by her rather rude assumption.

"I see. I'm very sorry to hear that, Robin. As I'm sure you know, the three of us can certainly relate to those feelings of loss and pain," Cora said, gesturing to Regina and Zelena, her voice suddenly sickly sweet with disgustingly fake empathy. Robin didn't think she could have been more cold and clearly lacking any feelings of 'loss or pain' if she tried. Nevertheless, Robin forced a tight smile and head nod in response.

"Thank you. It was a difficult adjustment, as Roland was only two at the time, but I've grown to love taking care of him. I really can't imagine that being far away from him would ever being in 'my best interest'," Robin couldn't resist answering tightly. Cora responded with an equally forced smile. Regina, meanwhile, looked like she was heavily contemplating the quickest means of killing herself.

"And what is it that your father does for a living that causes him to work so much?" Cora questioned further. Goodness, the audacity of this woman! Robin thought that surely his shortness in his last comment would have gotten this uncomfortable subject dropped.

"He was asked here to head the police station as sheriff, actually," Robin replied simply. Cora nodded, seemingly a bit disappointed that Robin hadn't confessed his father to be some low-level, unskilled, minimum wage employee at some obscure establishment.

"That's certainly, admirable. Sometimes I feel like a warden myself, running the high school," Cora replied facetiously, earning a far too eager laugh from Zelena and a begrudging half smile from Regina.

"Especially on football game days. The football team just gets so… rowdy!" Zelena said cheerfully, shaking her head with disapproval, as though she didn't definitely know that Robin was, in fact, on the football team.

"Have you never experienced the feeling of being excited for something other than your own accomplishments, Zelena?" Regina suddenly quipped from across the table. Robins' heart leapt, both out of delight to hear the Regina that he knew suddenly making an appearance, and also out of terror for the hell that she was sure to pay for her comment. Robin forced himself not to laugh, knowing that it would only make things worse.

Cora shot Regina a look of such cold and disapproving anger that Robin literally felt the urge to step in front of her and shield her from it.

"I can't imagine you'd know what that's like, seeing as you've never accomplished anything," Zelena spit back viciously, her piercing green eyes dancing with hostility.

"You're right, since I've never accomplished a single thing, all I have to look forward to are the successes of my high school football team, " Regina responded, letting the sarcasm flow thick as she leaned back in her chair and rolled her eyes. Zelena smirked and raised her eyebrows.

"Although it's… obvious you've never done anything athletic in your life," she retorted, glancing up and down Regina's body, making her implication clear. Robin was in shock. When Regina and their friends had alluded to the fact that Regina and Zelena did not see eye to eye, and that Zelena was the 'literal worst', he hadn't really thought much of it. But watching them tear each other apart like this was almost frightening.

"Ah, yes, because you yourself are such a distinguished athlete?" Regina sneered, arching one perfect, dark eyebrow. Zelena looked prepared to parry her jab, just as Cora clearly felt the urge to intervene.

"Regina, truly, you're not in any position to be making judgements about athletic ability," she interrupted, staring at Regina pointedly, before turning her attention back to Robin.

"Perhaps Robin here can make an athlete out of you," Cora said aloofly, as though somehow mocking both of them at the same time. Robin arched an eyebrow.

"Oh, certainly, Regina, I'm sure Coach Scarlett would love to have you. We simply just don't have enough 5'3, 120 pound people on our football team," Robin commented sarcastically, managing to subtly sneak in the fact that Cora and Zelena's ridiculous notion that Regina was fat was completely and utterly insane. Regina bit down on her lip so that she wouldn't laugh, but Robin could see the dance of amusement in her eyes, and the smile that so clearly wanted to spread across her face.

"Well, it certainly wouldn't hurt Regina to get a little exercise," Cora remarked abstractly, glancing sideways at Regina and taking a bite of chicken. Robin, horrified, glanced over at Regina, expecting to see a completely hurt and offended look displayed on her face. Rather, all he saw was a look of detached indifference, and a complete lack of surprise. How she was able to stay so calm, Robin would never understand.

"Oh, that reminds me! Regina, I have some clothes that you can have if you'd like," Zelena said, lacing her tone with mock sincerity. Regina raised her eyebrows, clearly very interested in where this was going.

"And why is it that they are no longer satisfying to you?" she asked, almost as though she were amused. Zelena heaved an overdramatic sigh.

"I've just been so incredibly stressed with keeping my grades up this year and running all of my clubs that I've been losing all this weight! They just don't fit me anymore," Zelena answered sweetly, as though what she'd just said was the kindest and most unassuming thing in the world. Robin, who was in the middle of taking a drink of water, literally spit the liquid back into his cup in sheer disbelief at Zelena's audacity. This family truly was as awful as Regina had said.

Much to Robin's admiration, however, Regina somehow managed a tight, polite smile and a comment of sarcastic gratitude.

In comparison to the last five minutes, although everything remained a bit awkward and forcibly polite, the rest of dinner passed with relatively no incident.

After another tortured half hour, Cora rose to began clearing the dishes. But, much to Robin's bewilderment, Regina stood first and stopped her.

"That's alright, Mother. You cooked, Robin and I will get all of this," Regina offered kindly. Robin watched as Zelena's green eyes suddenly filled with irritation and slight panic, as she wondered how she possibly didn't think to beat Regina to offering to clean up. Not to mention the fact that Robin scarcely understood how Regina could possibly even consider offering to help Cora right now, after how awful she'd been.

"Alright, dear. I appreciate that," Cora replied, her voice detached and cool, and transmitting absolutely no sense of appreciation or affection. No surprise there, Robin supposed.

"I can help too!" Zelena said quickly, standing up. Robin swore that he could almost hear Regina's delight to be one upping Zelena.

"Robin and I can handle it. But thanks," Regina shut her down cleanly, her tone sickly sweet and venomous at the same time. Robin fought the urge to grin at the knowing but dejected look on Zelena's face. Nevertheless, Cora and Zelena both exited the dining room to allow Regina and Robin to clean.

Robin literally had to force himself not to pull Regina into his arms immediately once they left, as some sort of bizarre gesture of pity and emotional support. He reckoned she could use it.

Instead, he followed as she picked up both her plate and Cora's, and began to make her way into the neighboring kitchen to place them in the sink. Robin, who was holding his plate and Zelena's stood behind her, her back turned to him as she began rinsing off the plates in the sink.

"I'm sorry that I volunteered you to clean up," she said suddenly, taking him by surprise. But something was wrong with her voice, he could tell. She sounded a bit… strangled? He couldn't quite place it. Regardless, he knew that something was wrong. He crossed the room from his place behind her, and placed both of the plates he was holding on the counter next to the sink so that he could stand next to her. She wasn't looking at him, which just made him more sure that something was off. Not that it wasn't entirely understandable and logical that she might be upset. If it were anyone but Regina, Robin would be expecting a full meltdown, and it would be justifiable.

"Don't worry about it. Regina, are you… are you alright?" Robin asked softly, staring intently at the dark curtain of Regina's hair separating his gaze from hers. At that, she did turn her face to look at him.

She wasn't exactly crying. Not yet, at least. There were discernible tears in her eyes, and evidence that at least one or two had escaped down her cheek, but it was also clear that she had no intention of losing control of them. Regardless, Robin hated it. Without hesitating, he wrapped his arms around her small body and pulled her into his chest. She didn't resist.

She didn't cry either, though. He wondered if she was concerned about what he might think of her if she did, and felt the need to let her know that it would be perfectly acceptable, and not unattractive in the slightest.

"Robin… It's really okay, you don't have to do this," Regina suddenly murmured, her voice a little muffled from being pressed against his chest. It was as though she could hear his thoughts or something. Robin shook his head, but pulled away, so that he could take both of her hands and see her face. She had the same look in her eyes that she'd had before he hugged her.

"Regina… That was completely horrible, I would be more concerned if you weren't upset," Robin said gently, using one of his thumbs to softly wipe away one of her tears. Regina shook her head at his statement.

"No, it's… it's not that, I'm not upset because of my mother and Zelena, really," Regina said quietly. Robin had to admit that he didn't entirely understand what else she could be upset about.

"How could you not be crying about that? Christ, I'm almost crying about that," Robin responded incredulously, raising both of his eyebrows. Regina chuckled a little bit at that, which made Robin feel slightly better. But she shook her head again.

"Honestly, I'm used to that. I know that isn't going to make you feel any better about it, but I'm so used to that at this point that it's hard for me to get upset about it," Regina answered him, sighing. Robin tried not to think too much about that.

"What is it then?"

"I just… I miss my Dad," Regina said quietly, suddenly staring up into Robin's eyes with a look of such raw vulnerability and sadness that if someone were really quiet, they could probably hear his heart breaking. Robin knit his eyebrows together empathetically, and tried to decide whether or not he should hug her again. He feared that if he did, he might never let her go.

"I haven't had a boyfriend-family dinner interrogation since Daniel when we were freshmen, and my father was there for that. He never let it get that way, he always protected me from my mother when she got out of hand, or from Zelena. And the fact that they got to do what they just did made me remember what it was like when he was here… he never would have let them ask you those things, or try and hurt me that way. It just made me particularly notice his absence, that's all," Regina continued, sighing, and averting her gaze from Robin's. This was so completely understandable, and even relatable for Robin, that he almost wanted to cry with her. Robin could relate so strongly to that awful feeling of emptiness and pain when he could plainly perceive his mother's absence. When he used to have to change Roland, or maybe soothe him after a nightmare… Or sometimes when he just wanted someone to take care of him for a second, for someone to make him dinner, bring him something, give him a hug when he was feeling lost. He hadn't felt it in awhile, but watching Regina experience it so harshly, brought memories of the awful emotion to the forefront of his memory.

"I understand," he said softly. He knew this answer, though seemingly trite and insincere, would be sufficient, as Regina knew that he truly did understand.

"And I'm also just… sorry you had to sit through that, you should never have had to do that," Regina said, sighing and shaking her head. Robin literally couldn't stand to hear her apologize.

"Regina, don't even begin to-"

"No, Robin, you really shouldn't have to. You shouldn't have to deal with my crazy mother, or step-sister. You shouldn't have to deal with me, or my emotions, or my drama, or my insane past, or my stress, or any of my issues. You have enough to deal with as it is, and it just isn't fair for me to expect you to do any of it," Regina continued over his protests, staring at him seriously. Robin took a moment to realize just how much she didn't understand. Didn't understand how much he wanted to deal with it all.

"Regina, I'm not sure where you've gotten the idea that I'm perfect, and don't have any of my own baggage, but wherever you got it, return it. I don't have to deal with anything, I want to. And this would be much easier if you'd just let me," Robin said, sighing. This did not seem to ease Regina's concern.

"Robin, if you were with anyone else you wouldn't have to-"

"If I were with anyone else, I'd have to be with someone other than you, and that fate is much, much worse, believe me," Robin interrupted her, unwilling to hear any of the nonsense that she was speaking about. Regina sighed again in frustration, as though he were missing what she was trying to tell him. He ignored her, and placed both of his hands on her hips to pull her to him. It was adorable how much this clearly distracted her, but she managed to speak anyways.

"I'm just saying, that if this is too much for you, and that if you want an out-"

"I don't."