Chapter Ten

The Hallway

Autolycus breathed a collective sigh of relief as the two newcomers to the library left, closing the door behind them. Thank Gods they had not known he was in there, and he had not been about to let them know that he was in there! Instead, he had tried very hard not to make a single sound, not even one of breathing, while they had debated the ethics of, of all things, mind wiping.

Autolycus had been in the library, going through sex manuals on animal mating and desperately seeking an answer for Eddie, but nothing had covered the subject of a donkey and a wolf doing it! Autolycus had shaken his head and had been about to reach for another book when he had heard voices and had hidden. Now he checked the hallway to make sure nobody was in it, and he quickly left the library, heading toward his own room. Never did he hear the voice that whispered in the empty room behind him.

Autolycus hoped to find Elizabeth in their room. He had almost reached the safety of his room when he heard some one walking. As they drew nearer, he recognized the footsteps of his beloved. "Liz?" he called, turning around and waiting for her to catch up with him. His breath caught in his throat as she came closer. Her lovely face was a mess. Her long, luscious hair looked as though she had been tearing at it, and runny makeup and tear stains criss-crossed over her face.

"Liz!" He ran to her. "What's wrong, darling?" He lifted her chin and saw that tears still sparkled in her eyes. He kissed both of her eyes and then the tip of her nose. "Is there anything I can do to help you feel better?" What had happened, he wondered, to make her so sad so soon when she had just been so happy with him during their picnic before Eddie had interrupted them?

Elizabeth had been trying desperately not to break down and dwell on what she now knew had happened to Will. She knew that time was of the essence for the meeting would soon be taking place and she had to have both men down there in time, but when Autolycus kissed her, she trembled and finally broke at his quietly-spoken question. Sobbing, she fell into his arms. "Oh, Toly, it's so awful! Poor Will!"

Out of all of the things that Toly had expected, this was not one of them! "What's wrong with Will, sweetheart? Is there something we can do to help him?" He held her as she cried and stroked her back to try to soothe her trembling body.

"What's been being said is true, dear. He and Jack are a part due to his inability to rise, but . . . " She shook like a leaf inside the safety of his arms. "Dear Gods, the reason why! Oh, Toly; it's so horrible, what that bitch did! If Jack hadn't already killed her, I'd kill her myself!"

Her words shocked him at first. He had never heard her talk with such conviction about killing any one, but surely it was only do to her anger. "You want to tell me about it?" He stroked her hair back from her face, gently massaging her temples. "What did the bitch do to him?"

"I-I-I only know one thing, but tha-that is so horrible I can not imagine what could possibly be any . . . any worse!" She looked at the man she loved through vision clouded by tears that poured like rain for she could feel her brother's pain almost as strongly as though it were her own. "She cut it off, Toly!"

His eyes grew large in shock; he stared at her for a moment before finding his voice. "That?! Oh my Gods! The poor man!" It was almost as though he could feel his own being cut off in sympathy! Shuddering, he pulled Elizabeth closer as though she could protect him from the threat of some one cutting his off. Then a thought besides the pain occurred to him. "How does he . . . go to the bathroom?" Autolycus queried. That could really be a problem! he thought. Surely he can . . . ?

"He was healed, remember? It's intact, but it doesn't . . . it doesn't work like it should and you know he's never going to be able to forget that! Who could?" How many other men, she wondered, could have even survived such a horrendous nightmare?

"We need to get a telepath to help him," he spoke confidently as he recalled the conversation he'd overheard between Hook and Celina. "We should ask Rachel for her help. I'm willing to pay her anything she asks. To heal your brother and make him one with his love again would bring the smile back to your eyes, my darling; I'm willing to do anything to see you smile again." Looking adoringly at her face, he traced her down-turned lips with a gentle thumb. "We'll ask her after the meeting."

"I'm not really sure how these telepaths work," Liz admitted with a slight frown of confusion. "Could she really make him forget all about it?"

"I'm not sure myself," Autolycus admitted, "but we can't lose anything by asking. Ray would be the one most likely to help."

She nodded. "We'll do so immediately after the meeting." She smiled up into his eyes. "You always have a plan, sweetheart, and you never cease to amaze me!" She kissed him.

"And you look more beautiful every time I see you, darling!" He leaned down and kissed her gently. "Where were you heading to so quickly? Is it something I can help you with?"

"I need to sneak into Jack's room and get Will something to wear. Would you believe he hasn't bathed in a month?"

He sniffed her again. "You'd best change your dress, dear," he advised, "before you get him clean clothes or they'll smell just like he already does. I'm afraid he got some on your dress. I'll get him some clothes while you change."

"No offense, love, but I need to do this. I need to pick out which outfit he'll look the most handsome in. It needs to be something that will drop Jack's mouth and leave him begging."

Toly looked at her with eyes of love. "Like I'm begging now, sweetheart?" He grinned at her. "I can't wait for the damn meeting to be over so that we can be alone again!"

"That makes two of us, my heart," she agreed, grinning widely for just a moment before falling solemn again, "but it may have to wait a little longer than that. We've got to get Will and Jack straightened out first, but then . . . " She reached over and gently twirled his mustache. "I'm all yours."

"I can hardly wait, my love! In the mean time, I'll be dreaming of every second we spend together!"


Screams made Cole's and James' heads snap up. They looked at each other, then at a snowy white owl that swooped with a scream through the hall. Both barely had time to leap out of the way before Delvira would have knocked them down as she raced after her husband, tossing fireballs ahead of them to try to slow him down. "Don't you dare continue running from me, Jareth!" she screeched. "Slow your ass down, and come down here and talk like a man!"

Her only answer was another screech of the owl and an increase in his flight speed. "Curse you, Jareth! No one blames you! At least, I don't! Why should it matter if any one else does?! I'm the only one you hurt!"

He would not listen to reason, however, and only continued to fly faster, cutting increasingly sharper turns around corners and trying desperately to lose her. She knew he was headed back to his room, but she would let him go through that door no more than she had the three times he'd headed for it before. She'd take the whole damn house apart, if she had to, to stop him! He would not get away from her!

She tossed two fireballs at once, ignoring some bit's nearby scream. She paid no more attention to Autolycus as he swept Elizabeth into his arms and pressed them both against the supposed safety of the wall. The next corner, Delvira knew, would bring Jareth into focus with his room. She had to stop him!

As they rounded the corner, Delvira almost collided with Wolverine, who was already slapping his arms over his head and bellowing. Jareth must have touched down upon him, Delvira thought, just long enough to piss him off and cause me a distraction. Better luck next time, baby. Not! She did not slow; Wolverine did not see her. Delvira leapt just before she could hit him and landed on his shoulders. He nearly toppled beneath her, but as he went down, she leapt again, her arms reaching out as far as she could stretch.

Her hand touched Jareth's talon. She made a grasp for it and let out a surprised screech when he scratched her. Her skin ripped, and blood trickled. Even as she fell, she lobbed fireballs toward his door. She hit the floor hard; Jareth still did not slow.

Delvira sat up quickly and was startled to hear a voice that sounded almost next to her ear. "Come inside; meet the Missus." She looked at Worm with clear surprise shining in her black eyes. His Missus was long dead!

The sound of a slamming door snapped Delvira back to attention. She leapt to her feet, but it was too late for Jareth was nowhere in sight and his door was closed. She rushed to it, wondering what had happened to her fireballs -- had her husband somehow magicked them away? --, and tried to open it. She put every ounce of her strength into trying to pull the door open first and then into trying to break it down, but nothing worked.

Then, with a scream of rage, she whirled around. Fireballs glistened in both her curled, pale hands. Wolverine, who, up until that point, had been planning on creaing a little Hell of his own, rushed around the corner. Delvira's eyes searched the wall. There was no sign of Worm, so she settled for hurling her fireballs at the spot where he had been. "Damn you, Worm! If I ever see you again, I'm throwing you into a damn tequilla bottle and giving you to Faith!"

Worm trembled in his hiding spot but dared not show himself. His loyalty lay to the King. It always had and always would.


Derek's Bedroom

"Ow!" Derek cried out as Chong's fist slammed into his nose. He fell back, holding his nose in both hands. Blood seeped through his fingers.

"Chong," Hansel exclaimed, "look at what you've done!" He turned to Derek and held his hands gently around his nose. "Let me see, baby," he crooned, forgetting, for a moment, how afraid he was of losing Chong. "How bad is it?"

Glaring daggers into Derek, Chong exploded. "CAO NI ZU ZONG SHI BA DAI, CHOU WANG BA DAN YANSE LANG!!!" Hansel looked at Chong with an open mouth; he'd never heard him cuss like that! Then, in English, Chong continued, "YOU CAN'T HAVE HANSEL! HE'S MINE!!!" He reached out, grabbed Hansel's arm, and slapped a handcuff on him.

"Chong!" Hansel protested, trying to pull away, but the angry, Chinese man would have none of it.

"You're not getting off of there again!" Chong told Hansel as he yanked him to him.

"You can't do that!" Derek spoke around his bleeding nose. His hands dropped from his nose and balled into fists. He would fight for his love's freedom, even if he didn't stand a chance in Hell of winning! "You can't do that to him! Release him! He's not yours to take! He says he loves both of us, and I'm not willing to give up my part!"

"I'm not willing to share!" Chong told him, glaring at him. "He is mine! He was mine first! You can't have him!"

Derek got a hold of Hansel's free hand; Chong pulled at him with the chain. Hansel's yells went unnoticed by both as they each tried to keep him.

"WHAT THE HELL'S GOING ON HERE?!" James demanded to know, his mustache bristling, as he came up to the group. "There's a meeting in fifteen minutes! You will let Hansel go, Chong," James told him. "Hansel will not run off anywhere. You can't tear him in half and each have half of him! It doesn't work that way! He's admitted that he loves both of you, and you've got to work a solution out!"

James had heard most of the conversation and witnessed the war on poor Hansel's body. Hansel looked as though he had been through Hell that day. First, Faith had beaten the Hell out of him, and now his aching body felt as though he'd been ripped in half by his two lovers.

"I'm not going to share him! He's mine!" Chong stated again.

"Actually, Chong," James dared to look him in the eyes, "Hansel belongs to Hansel, and if I was him, I'd deny both of you." He turned and walked off, leaving the three behind him with gaping mouths.


Jack's Bedroom

Jack threw a pair of pants at Elvira for the fifth time. "I'M NOT WEARING THOSE DAMN THINGS!" he bellowed. "I DON'T CARE WHAT YOU DO WITH THEM! GET RID OF THEM, AND GET ME A NORMAL PAIR OF PANTS OUT OF MY CLOSET!" He glared angrily at her.

"Normal is so overrated." Elvira sighed and shook her head. Then, a thought crossed her mind. She bent and gathered the pants slowly into her arms. As she stood, she shook her head again and shrugged her shoulders. "Fine," she announced. "If you only want to be some of the man you could be for Will instead of all of the man . . . " She slowed as she headed out the bathroom door.

"I CAN'T WEAR THOSE DAMN THINGS! THEY SHOW TOO MUCH!"

"They only show what they were made to show."

"I'M NOT JARETH!" He thought back to the last time he had seen the King. That man wore the tightest pants he had ever seen in his life, and now he knew why. Delvira's taste in pants was definitely . . . lacking.

"No one said you were!"

"I think I look good enough without being stuffed into a can where I can't move! Now hurry or we're going to miss the meeting!"

"They can't start the meeting without the Captain, Jack; you, of all people, should know that! And I'm telling you: If you'd just try them on, you'd be surprised at how well they fit! You can actually get around better in them than you can in most pants."

"Elvira," he growled out threateningly.

"Oh, don't try to threaten me, little birdie," she told him with a sashay of her hips. "I've eaten men thrice as big as you for breakfast, but if you don't want to look the best for Will . . . Well . . . " She shook her head again. "That's you, but I'd do anything and everything I could to catch my Wolf again. I've even got a new plan hatching that involves naked breasts and fresh Spring lamb, and believe me, the thought of young lambs being mutilated for eating totally grosses me out . . . But, hey, it's all for my Wolfie Wolf!"

"Your Wolfie Wolf?" Jack brought a finger to his lips and looked at her intently. He then pointed downward to one of the grills in the wall. He hoped she would understand the message he was sending her.

Wolf was nearby, and he was listening. He licked his lips at the thought of young Spring lamb, and yet he licked his lips when he saw her even more. He could hardly wait to hold her yet once again. Then he had to remind himself of that awful, awful time so recently fresh in his mind that he'd almost killed his beloved mate. He'd almost eaten her, for Gods' sakes! No way could he get near her! But he couldn't seem to stay away, either! What was a wolf to do?

Elvira turned back to look at Jack. "I already know, hon," she told him with a wink. Placing a finger on her nose, she mouthed, "The nose knows."

"Please get me another pair of pants, Elvira," Jack pleaded with her one more time, "and hurry! We don't want to delay the meeting!"

"Fine," Elvira replied with a shake of her head, "but you're missing a great opportunity here." Just as she went into the bedroom, however, she heard the door shut, and when she reached the closet, she found it empty. "Looks like you've got no choice after all!" she called back.

"WHY IS THAT?" Jack yelled out the door.

"Your clothes are gone!"

"Find out who took my clothes and bring them back! Thieves amongst us? We're Pirates, for Gods' sakes, and we're a family! We're not supposed to be stealing from each other, just others! Find out who took my clothes and quick, Elvira!"

"I thought you didn't want to delay the meeting?"

"I want my clothes! I want a good pair of pants! I can't go out there, looking like that! Now please hurry; they couldn't have gotten too far!"

"You could," Elvira told him. "You just won't." She made a clucking noise that sounded like a chicken.

"I'm not gonna do it! I'll wear a sheet first!"

She laughed. "Actually, there is something to be said about a sheet. Most of them are so sheer that they reveal even more than what these pants do."

"Elvira, what am I gonna do with you?"

Elvira laughed again. "You may not appreciate me now, Jack, but you will when Will's mouth hangs open and he has to shut it to keep from panting like a dog in heat."

"Are you going or not, Elvira? And take those awful pants with you; give them to whoever took my clothes!"

"Fine, fine . . . " she muttered with a roll of her black eyes. "Let me just locate the scent." It took her less than a minute of sniffing to figure out who the culprit was. "Huh!" A look of complete surprise flashed over her pale face.

"Elvira, I can tell you can tell who it is. Go get them, and give them that pair of pants! I don't know why they want me clothes, but they damn sure can't have them!"

"That makes two of us," Elvira called as she headed for the door. "I can't fathom what Autolycus would want with your wardrobe."

"Damn you, Autolycus!" Jack exclaimed, striking the wall. He couldn't believe the thief was up to his old tricks again! "Remind him to stay out of my closet if he wants to keep from being marooned! He must have stolen them for Elizabeth, but I don't care! Nobody messes with my clothes! Go get them back and hurry, but find out what he wanted them for while you're at it!"

"I'm going," Elvira called as she walked out, "and I know you haven't eaten in days so feel free to help yourself to the little bug dish I keep in my supplies. It's on one of the fold out trays." The door clicked shut behind her.

"Bug dish? Do I even want to know?" He looked down at the tray. He looked a little closer at it. "There's something moving in there," he commented to the merkitty who was watching him. "I'm not opening that! Euuw! How could any one eat those things?!" His stomach lurched at the mere thought of devouring actual bugs!


Derek's Bedroom

Hansel quickly remembered how to work his mouth. "James, please, don't leave me like this! He's still got me handcuffed! They could go back at ripping me apart, and I'd be helpless!"

"Release him," James commanded as he whirled around to face Chong again. He raised his hook threateningly, pointing it at the Chinese man's face.

Chong reluctantly released Hansel. "I'm not willing to share!"

"I am!" Derek exclaimed, still not letting go of Hansel's arm but now rubbing the part that he had been pulling on. "I'll do anything to keep my part of Hansel!"

Chong stomped angrily down the stairs and into the meeting room. This could continue forever, because he was not going to give up Hansel and he'd be damned if Derek was going to get a piece of his man!

It had only been Derek's exclamation that he was willing to share that had kept Hansel from running. Now he slumped like a pillow that had had the stuffing beaten out of it against the door; it was all he could do to keep standing. He looked at James through a swolled, blackened eye. "Thanks."

"I don't know how you got yourself in that position, son, but I don't have any advice for you. I wish you good luck, though." He continued on his way to the next room without a backward glance. He was thankful that he was not in Hansel's shoes. All he wanted was Smee; all he had ever wanted was Smee. He just had to find a way to win his love back over, and he thought he might finally be on the right track. He resumed his humming.

Derek shook his head as he looked adoringly at Hansel. "Chong's a fool. Better to have part of you than none at all," Derek told him. "You're the best thing that's ever happened to me! I'm sorry I pulled you so hard a while ago, but I was afraid I was going to lose you! You poor baby!" he cried, looking at his black eye. "Did Chong do that you? I'll beat him to within an inch of his life!"

Hansel started to shake his head but stopped as he discovered that that even hurt now. "No, Faith did that one." He reached up and caressed Derek's face. "I'm so glad you understand. I really didn't mean for this to happen! I was hiding out in Tortuga, mostly to keep Faith safe from herself but also partially to try to figure out which one of you I love the most. You see how Chong got a hold of me. I felt like I had no choice, that I had to choose between the two of you, and since he got me first, I felt like I had to choose him. But then . . . then I was here and seeing you cry . . . Oh, baby, I wish I could keep you from hurting!" His fingers traced the stains Derek's tears had made on his face.

Derek gently kissed Hansel. "And I wish I could take your pain away! Let Chong be an idiot! I'll take care of you and love every minute doing so! Faith won't hit you any more. If she does, I'll hit her!"

"I love you! I always have, from the first moment we met! It doesn't matter that you don't love me all the way yet; maybe one day, you will. I'm even willing to tolerate Chong, if you really want him, but he'll have to make that decision too." He held on to Hansel as though he was his lifeline, and his hand ran gently down his back.

"We'd best get down to the meeting. Promise me one thing, though, Hansel, that you won't run and hide any more and that, if you have any more problems, you'll come and talk to me. We'll try to work things out."

Hansel pressed his face into the side of Derek's and breathed in his scent. It felt so good to hold him and be held by him again! "I knew you'd be understanding," he breathed, "and I promise. No more running, no more hiding. But if Faith gets back to Tortuga, you know some one's gotta have to keep the girl from doing herself in."

He pulled back just enough that he was able to place his face against Derek's. His forehead pressed gently against his forehead, his nose to his nose, and his lips hovered just a breath away from his. "And I want you to know, Derek, I honestly do love you! I don't know how it's possible, but I truly feel like I love both you and Chong with all my heart!"

"I hope we can get to the bottom of this one day soon, weed him out of my heart, out of my system," he knew he was lieing for he would have told Chong that Derek was the one he wanted to weed out, "but I just don't know how right now! And thank you for always being so understanding with me. I love you!" This time, he pressed his lips to Derek's, gently at first and then with growing passion.

"We'd best get to the meeting," Derek broke off reluctantly, "or they'll be up here looking for us. We can continue this later, sweetheart. I can't wait to delve into your private ocean!"

Hansel took Derek's hand in his and linked his fingers with his. Hand in hand, they headed toward the family room. Let Chong fume, Hansel thought. Maybe he'd decide he was worth sharing. Besides, it looked like Derek would be the better choice, after all. He was understanding. He was sweet. He was good to him.

Yet, then again, he'd always thought Chong to be all of that, and Chong had never tried to run from the feelings they had for each other, as Derek once had. He sighed inwardly, but his smile remained in place. The only way some one could have told he was still sad is if they had bothered to look into his eyes. It was great to be back with Derek, but oh, how he missed his Chinese otter already!


Jack's Bedroom

"Wolf, I know you're in there," Jack called out to his friend. "Why don't you come on out of there? We've got to get you back the way you were! Elvira sure would like to see you!"

"I can't!" Wolf cried up at Jack. "I can't trust myself! I'll eat her!"

"I don't see how."

"But I did . . . almost! One of the tests . . . ! I can't trust myself around her!"

"So instead you hide in the walls?"

"Yeah, and watch her sleep at night." His tail thumped.

"She knows you're there."

"As long as I'm here and she's there, she's safe."

"Do you want to eat me?" Jack asked him.

"No."

"What about any of the other beings that live in the house?"

"No. Just her!" He whined.

"I'm going to get a telepath to see about your problem."

"Can you make it soon, Jack? I am awfully hungry!" He fought desperately to keep from licking his lips as he thought of his beloved and quell the painful roar in his stomach.

"Yeah, I'll make it in just a little bit, Wolf. Damn!" Jack exclaimed. "We can't have you coming out of the walls and eating your girlfriend! I'll set something up just as soon as I get down to the business meeting," he promised, staring at his reflection in the small mirror above the sink. Water splashed onto him, and he reached a hand down to stroke the merkitty. He was rewarded with a purr that sounded bigger than the kitty looked.


Autolycus & Elizabeth's Bedroom

Autolycus' head snapped up as a knock sounded upon his bedroom door. He didn't move, didn't breathe. Was it Jack? Had the Captain discovered that he was the one who had stolen from him?

"I know you're in there, Autolycus, and I know what you've done. Now open the door."

Autolycus looked at the door with larger eyes. Jack had sent Elvira after him? Why? Was she going to try to eat him?

"Honey," Elizabeth called from the bathroom door, where she had, evidently, just finished redressing, "what is it?"

"Keep your voice down," he whispered warily. "It's Elvira. She's come for the pants!"

"Well, she can't have all of them!"

Elvira looked at the pants in her own hand, her mind swiftly putting two and two together. "Elizabeth," she questioned through the closed door, "why do you guys want Jack's pants?"

"Will needs an outfit to turn Jack's head."

"I have just the thing."

"You do, do you?" Liz queried in return.

"I do indeed! Black leather pants!"

"What's so great about them other than the fact that they're made of leather?"

"They're the same sort of pants Jareth wears. They were bought from the same designer."

Elizabeth started to hurry toward the door, then slowed and looked at it in sudden suspicion. "Why would you just give them to us?"

"Because Jack refuses to wear them!"

"Why?"

Elvira rolled her eyes. "Who knows? I never thought of him as a chicken until a little while ago when he stauntly refused them! They'd be perfect to use for him to turn Will's head, but since he refuses them, Will can be the one to make him beg!"

"And you're giving them to us freely?" Elizabeth asked, opening the door a crack as Autolycus gripped a sword in the background.

"Absolutely," Elvira spoke at first but then relented. "Well, not quite. More of a trade really. You give me Jack's pants back; I'll give you these."

"Pass them through the door and let me take a look at them."

Elvira handed Elizabeth the pants; she quickly shut and locked the door in the Vampiress' face. Liz then turned to Autolycus and held the pants out. She examined them carefully, imagining first what they would look like on her beloved and then how they would look on Will. A slow grin tugged at her mouth. "Mmm!" she announced at last. "Got any more of these?"

"I'm not wearing those things!" Toly told her. "Jareth's the only man I know who can carry that off! I doubt Will will wear them."

"Ah, you're just too modest!" Elizabeth exclaimed. "But you're right." She frowned. "Will's even more modest than you are."

"Just tell him you don't know what Jack did with the other pants and that these are all you can find," Elvira advised through the door. "The only other one you could get clothes from, especially on short notice like this, is Autolycus, and his simply wouldn't fit him."

"Do you think he'd buy it?"

"It depends. Can you carry off a lie?"

"Of course I can carry off a lie! I'm a Pirate!"

"And a very good one, at that!" Toly complimented her. "The only way you're going to get those pants on Will is if they're the only pair you carry in there, and then you're going to have to drag him out of there."

Elizabeth had flashed Autolycus a brilliant smile when he'd declared her to be a very good Pirate, but now she fell serious again. "Actually, I don't really think that's going to be a problem. I thought I was going to have to drag him originally; that's why I went to check on him. He believes he's got to go to the meeting to stay on the crew, and he's determined to stay on the crew so that he can at least be close to Jack even if he can't make him happy. However, I think I may have fixed that problem, too . . . At least I hope I did . . . " Realizing what she'd said, Elizabeth exclaimed, "And don't either of you dare repeat that to anybody!"

"Cross my heart, hope to die," Toly assured her with a wink, "if I ever repeat it. You know what the meeting's about, though? Trying to work problems out?"

"I know," Elizabeth assured him, "but that doesn't mean Will needs to know. Elvira?" She looked pointedly at the Vampiress as she opened the door and Autolycus sat his sword back down.

"You have my word. Besides, I want to see the boys back together as much as you do, girl! I've been working on Jack practically all morning! Wait till you see him again; you won't recognize him!" She giggled, wrinkled her nose, and winked.

"I hope that's good," Liz mused doubtfully.

"It's better than good. It's great!" Elvira grinned. "Now how about those clothes?"

To Be Continued . . .