Hurrah, another chapter complete!
Encouraged by all your lovely reviews, I typed this bad boy up as fast as my little fingers could without spelling every single word wrong.
Hope you like it :)
I own Glee in my mind, but not in reality. Unfortunatly.
Can't Fight This Feeling Part Ten – Finn Needs Answers
"Why did you do it?"
I had cornered Puck in the locker room after football practice, nearly a week after I found out that he'd told Jacob to post that article about me and Kurt. I hadn't spoken to him at all since then, and I didn't particularly want to talk to him now. But I needed to know why he would do something like that to me. I mean, I'm his best friend... was his best friend. I had to know the reason why. I just needed a little time to calm down first, which took a little longer than I thought.
When I looked at him now, I really wanted to punch him in the face again. But about a week ago I actually would've done, and that wouldn't get me anywhere. I was made to promise that I wouldn't act on my anger by Mr. Schuester (I'd already got detention) and by Quinn. But, most importantly, I promised Kurt. And there was no way that I was going to break a promise to him.
"So, you're talking to me again, huh?" said Puck, raising an eyebrow. "I thought I was dead to you?"
"Just answer the question," I said, trying to keep calm. "Why did you do it?"
"You still going on about that stupid article?" he scoffed. "No one even cares about that anymore. It's old news."
"That's not true," I said.
Okay, so Kurt hadn't been thrown in the dumpster for a while, but that was just because every guy in school was too afraid to go near him in case he somehow turned them gay. Instead he was being called some awful names, worse than before and, no matter how many times he said otherwise, I knew that it totally bummed him out. But by far the worst thing was that his house got egged. He told me that his Dad was so angry that he threatened to take a blowtorch to the house of every kid that did it once he found out who all they were.
I'd been slushied more times than when I first joined Glee Club, and almost always with cherry flavoured ones, as they would stain my face and my clothes a kind of pinkish-red colour. I probably would have found that sort of clever if, y'know, wasn't happening to me and everything.
It wasn't old news. If it was, everyone would have left me and Kurt alone by now.
"Look," I said. "I just want to know why you did this. I mean, I thought I was your boy. You and me are supposed to be best friends."
Puck just rolled his eyes and carried on packing his football uniform into his gym bag.
"I don't even get why you're so pissed about me being with Kurt," I said. "Everyone else in Glee Club accepts it. Even Quinn accepts it, and she has a lot more reason to be mad that you do."
"That' just it," he suddenly said. "She's not mad. No one is. You knock her up and then ditch her because you've decided to be a fag now, and still everyone freakin' loves you. As usual."
"As usual?" I said. "What's that supposed to mean?"
"Oh, come on," he sneered. "Don't act like you don't know what I'm talking about. And I bet you just love it, don't you? Everyone's on your side, you've got your hot cheerleader girlfriend having you kid, Rachel Berry's always throwing herself at you, and now you've got Kurt Hummel worshipping the ground you walk on, on top of everything else. Whop-dee-freakin'-doo."
All of a sudden, something clicked in my head. It all seemed so obvious now.
"You're jealous."
"What?" said Puck through gritted teeth.
"You heard me," I said. "You're jealous."
"Jealous of what exactly?" he said, narrowing his eyes. "You think that I'd rather it was me dating Hummel or something?"
"It wouldn't surprise me," I said with a smirk.
"What?!"
Okay, I knew that Puck didn't like Kurt in that way. Or at all, for that matter. It was impossible. But I was feeling kind of evil and this seemed like the perfect opportunity to screw with him.
"Oh, it all makes sense now," I said. I was laying it on thick. "I can't believe I didn't notice before. That's why you were so pissed when I came out to the Glee Club; you wished that you could be in my place! You were so mad because Kurt's unavailable now that you made Jacob post that article, like a kind of 'if I can't have him, no one can' sort of thing!"
"Shut the hell up, man!"
"Look, I hate to break it to you," I said with pretend sympathy. "But even if me and Kurt weren't together, I don't think you'd ever have a shot with him. He is way out of you league."
"I don't even - ! Shut up!!"
This was a lot more fun than it probably should have been. Puck looked about ready to hit me, and I kind of hoped that he would. At least then I could kick his ass again and just say that he'd started it.
"Dude, you don't know what you're freakin' talking about!" he yelled. "Unlike you, I am not a fag!"
I knew I should give it up then. He looked real pissed off, which was very satisfying, but this wasn't getting me anywhere. I still needed to know why he made Jacob post that article.
"I know, I know," I said. "I'm just messing with you. But, at least now you know what it feels like to be accused of something you haven't done. Like what you've done to Kurt."
Puck rolled his eyes, folding his arms and leaning against his locker.
"He hasn't done anything wrong," I said. "He didn't turn me gay. At least, not on purpose. He was already getting a hard time from everyone anyway and now, thanks to you, he's being treated like he's got small pox or something. I mean, I know you guys don't really get along and stuff, but I really don't get why you would do this. I just... I need some answers."
Puck just glared at me for what felt like ages but probably wasn't that long. I kind of wished I could hear what he was thinking.
Then he said "You really want to know why I did it, huh? Well, I'll tell you. It was because it was the only way to get you off your freakin' high horse."
I didn't really know what he meant by that. He must have seen the confusion on my face as he rolled his eyes at my again.
"I've been your best friend for years," he said. "And time and time again I've seen you get whatever the hell you want without even having to try. You get everything – Quinn, Rachel... Kurt – and I'm always supposed to just stand back and congratulate you. Well, not this time. I mean, c'mon, what the hell did you expect me to do, throw you a goddamn Coming Out party?"
"Well, no, but I never expected this," I said.
"Even when you screw up, everyone still thinks the sun shines out your ass," he said. "I just wanted to bring you down a peg. Kick you off that big pedestal you've been put up on all these years."
That was it? That was his whole reason doing this to me and Kurt? That had to be the weakest, most lame excuse I had ever heard. I was struggling to hold together. I really wanted to just... bash his head against the freaking locker! But I couldn't do that. I just needed to wrap this up quick before I did something I'd totally regret doing later.
"Listen, Noah," I said. I only called him that when I wanted to annoy him. "That so-called excuse of yours doesn't really make up for everything you've done to me and Kurt. Now, if I had my way, I'd be kicking your homophobic ass right now. But I promised that I wouldn't act on my anger. I promised Mr. Schue, and I promised Quinn, and I promised my boyfriend. To be honest, you're not even worth the effort. I don't give a damn what you or anyone else in this stupid school thinks. I love Kurt, and I'm not going to change that just to make everyone else like me, because you guys are just total dumbasses. Now, I'll be civil to you at practice and at Glee rehearsals and stuff but, as far as I'm concerned, you are not my boy anymore. Kurt was right. I shouldn't let you guys run my life, because me and him are so much better than all of you."
And, with that, I walked out of the locker room with my head held high, leaving Puck (my ex-best friend) to think about what he'd done. Obviously, Kurt was the first person I told about me and Puck's little conversation. He also thought that Puck's reason was totally stupid. I was glad it wasn't just me. He was also super proud of what I'd said, and especially proud that I'd kept my promise and not punched Puck in the face again. And, y'know what? I was proud of me too.
Don't worry, Humble Readers, slightly more cheerful things will start happening soon :)
The next Part will be a bit more Finn/Kurt-y, and a bit less dramatic-y.
Please keep the gorgeous reviews coming. They make smile :D
xxx
