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Run This Town
-Chapter 11-
I woke up at 9: 30 A.M.; almost two hours late for school. I cursed while kicking my sheets and trying to untangle my legs. I felt as if I had just crawled into bed five minutes ago. I didn't even remember falling asleep. I certainly didn't feel like I slept last night. My eyes were so heavy that I thought I might just fall back asleep in the middle of getting ready.
I twisted my feet into my shoes and tossed on a clean shirt, momentarily wondering why my mother didn't wake me up. Then I remembered that she had today off. She was probably still sleeping herself.
My body felt weak, almost as though it had taken a severe beating. I felt like someone had drained the life out of me. I was as exhausted as I was last night. Could not even sleep make me feel better anymore?
I walked out of my room and into the bathroom, running my fingers through my hair in a failed attempt to make it appear tame. Then I reached forward to turn on the faucet, picking up my toothbrush and placing it under the running water for a moment. I glanced around, looking for the toothpaste. I sighed and used my free hand to open the cabinet over the sink and rifle through it. A little blue shiny tube caught my eyes, and I pulled it out of the cabinet and uncapped the bottle of toothpaste with my thumb, pouring a thick streak of it onto the white bristles of my toothbrush.
I was just about to close the cabinet when something else caught my eyes. It was a bright orange container, maybe the size of my hand. I had never seen it in there before and, out of sheer curiosity, I reached forward and grasped it in my hand. I twisted my wrist to spin it around and look at the white sticker on it. It looked like one of the medicine containers that doctors prescribe to their patients. I felt a growing sense of dread bubble in the pit of my stomach. Was something wrong with my mom that she wasn't telling me about? Was she sick?
I quickly scanned the white sticker and divulged the information on it, including the doctor that perscribed it, the clinic it was given at, the name...
"Mark?" I said aloud to myself. Why would my mother have his...?
OxyContin.
The bathroom walls echoed the sounds of my toothbrush dropping into the sink and the container in my hand falling to the floor. And it was deafening.
I didn't give myself time to think about the possible reasons that my mother would have this. All the signs made sense now; the mood swings, the difference in her appearance.
I wasn't going to fool myself. I wasn't going to think of positively. I didn't have enough energy to.
So, I swooped down and grabbed the container, stalking out of the bathroom and down the hallway. I didn't even knock on her bedroom door. I just pushed it open, and she turned around to look at me in surprise from her spot in front of the closet. And then she gave me a smile as pretty as the sun and, for a moment, I almost wanted to turn around and pretend that everything is okay.
But it's not. Nothing is. Not anymore.
"Good morning, Yuugi. I didn't expect you up so soon. I decided to let you sleep in today. I saw how tired you were last night; you looked absolutely miserable, baby. But I'm sure it won't hurt you to miss a day of school. I--"
She stopped. Her eyes were no longer on my face, but had riveted to the container in my hand. She raised her eyes to meet mine once more, and I could see the utter shock etched into the fine lines of her face. A deer caught in headlights.
"Is he selling you this?" I asked her, shaking the small container. "Is that why you're in such a good mood lately?"
"Yuugi, I can explain--"
"It's addicting," I hissed lowly. "Don't you know that? It's one of the most addicting drugs out there!"
"Yuugi, listen to me," she said, walking over to me and grabbing both of my shoulders. I looked away from her as she bent down to my level. I couldn't bare to look at her. "Baby, it's not what you think. Doctors prescribe that to their patients everyday. It's a pain reliever, and I'm only using it once in a while." She lifted one of her hands off my shoulder and placed it under my chin, turning my head so that I had to look at her. She gave me a tiny smile. "I'm just using it so that I can focus more on work and the bills and you, sweetie, without being weighed down with all these...feelings."
I looked at her for a moment, digesting her words. And then I laughed, and I couldn't stop. My mother's face twisted into a look filled with worry and concern, and it only made me laugh harder. "Well, fuck," I said, ignoring the way my mother gasped at my language. "If everyone else is going to take the easy way out, I might as well, too." I chuckled a little more, but I was not amused. I was devastated.
"Yuugi, please," she said, giving me a little shake. Maybe she thought I was losing it. I mean, I thought I was. "I am not addicted, nor am I going to become addicted to these, do you hear me? I can prove it to you."
At her words, I glanced up at her, as she grabbed the container out of my hands and walked out of the room. Of course, I followed her.
She turned into the bathroom and opened the toilet lid. I watched her from the doorway and, I have to admit, my heart lifted just a fraction when she poured the contents of the container into the bowels of the toilet and flushed.
"You see?" she said, looking back at me. "I don't need these, honey. I'm sorry, I was just so stressed about everything...that I thought it couldn't hurt to use one every once in a while." She walked back over to me and touched my forehead. "I love you, Yuugi. All I need is you to be happy."
I tried not to cry. I tried so hard not to cry. But I did. For about the fourth time in the past two days, I cried and cried and cried. And my mother didn't ask me what was wrong. She just held me and told me that everything was going to be okay. And it only made the tears come harder. Not because her words reassured me.
But because I couldn't believe her.
----
Even though my mother gave me the day off of school, I didn't use it like I should have. In bed, that is.
Instead, I made my way to the warehouse. I needed to talk to Jou. I needed a friend, and though Ryou was one of my closest ones at this point, I still couldn't bear the thought of seeing him again after the way I left yesterday.
I slipped into the entrance of the warehouse and slowly trudged up the stairs. My heart beat with every step, and it was with a little spark that I realized I was nervous. I hadn't been nervous since...the first time I came here.
When I got to the door, I didn't know what to do. Part of me wanted to walk right in like I always did, part of me wanted to turn around and walk right back home. So I did something around the middle of both. I raised my hand and knocked.
I heard a grunt, followed by a string of curses. I recognized the voice and almost wanted to run. But before I could move, the door swung open and a very disheveled Atem -- hair tousled and eyes glowing from sleep -- was the sight that greeted me. I opened my mouth to say something, to apologize for slapping him, to explain myself, to tell him that, regardless of everything that had happened between us, there was still a part of me that liked him. A lot.
"Yuugi?" he said, surprised. "What are you doing here?"
Ouch. I looked away, my eyes locking with the floor. "I just came to talk to Jou..."
"He's not here," Atem replied. "No one is."
"Oh." I bit my lip, my face heating with embarrassment. "I guess I'll go then."
"No."
I looked back up at Atem. "What?"
"Come in," he said, gesturing inside with his head. "Let's talk."
I should have said no. I should have gone back home. But I realized that I never do the things I should. "Okay," I said, and I walked past him into the room. I settled down on the couch, because I didn't want to look like an idiot and just stand in the middle of the room. I was surprised when he plopped down next to me and turned his head to gaze at me. He looked more beautiful than usual.
"So," he said suddenly. "Talk."
"Uhh." I sighed and glanced in another direction. "I don't exactly know what to say."
Atem shrugged. "Well, what were you going to talk to Jou about?"
My life. My mother. You. "Nothing really."
Atem tsked, his tongue clicking against his teeth over and over. "What a bad liar you are, Yuugi."
I narrowed my eyes and looked back at him... "I'm not--" ...only to realize that he was leaning over, only an inch away from my face.
"You're not?" Atem smirked, moving forward as I moved back. "I think you are."
"Atem." His name was breathtaking on my lips. "What are you--"
"--doing?" Atem's smirk widened. "I'm trying to kiss you."
His bluntness made me laugh. And I both hated and loved that about him. It was always so hard for me to stay mad at him, no matter what he did. And that irritated me to no end. He was the only one who could control me like that. And he made me realize that moment that even though I was still so hurt by him and all the others, they were my friends. They had been some of the only people that had made an effort to spend time with me and talk to me, so that I wasn't alone in this big, dark corner of the earth. They protected me with methods that I didn't agree with, but they were all I had and they had stuck with me when they could have so easily dropped me. Wasn't that what I always wanted? People who would never leave me like so many had before? I tried to get my mind off of thoughts of my father leaving, off of my Grandpa passing away, off of my old school friends who hadn't made so much as an effort to call me.
Because when it came down to it, I was so sick of being sad. I was so done with feeling this way. I had what I wanted right in front of me. All I had to do was accept them; all of them. Even Bakura.
"You know," I said, getting back to the gorgeous man right beside me. "I did slap you the other day."
"Oh, yes, I do recall that." Atem inched forward, and his eyes glittered with humor. "Hmm, I wonder what your punishment will be."
I rolled my eyes, and a smile touched my lips for the first time in what seemed like forever. "Does there always have to be a punishment?"
Atem chuckled. "Not always." He said, leaning closer. "You could just let me kiss you."
I leaned away from him, playing his game. My back started to sting with the odd angle of my spine. "I could," I said. "But I'm still mad at you for not telling me about...you know...stuff you should have told me about."
Atem gave a loose shrug of his shoulders. "Yeah, but you're always mad at me."
"True," I said. "But still..."
"Okay then," Atem responded, sitting back upright. "If you don't want to kiss me, then why don't you tell me what you came here to talk about with Jou?"
My good mood suddenly diminished a little. "Oh. Um, nothing really. Just...stuff."
"Stuff?" Atem lifted an elegant brow. "Like?"
I sighed, shaking my head softly. "Just some things going on back at home...and here, too, I guess...and with my friend at school..."
"Sounds like you got alotta stuff going on." Atem picked up his pack of cigarettes from the armrest of the couch and placed one in his mouth. He went to take a lighter out of his pocket, but I reached forward and touched his arm, making him pause.
"I really don't like when you smoke," I said. "It gives me a headache."
Atem laughed and pulled the cigarette back out of his mouth. "Alright. But only because your life is so fucked right now."
I couldn't help but laugh, too. "You have no idea," I murmured.
"Oh, I have an idea." Atem looked back at me, his eyes gaining their shiny glint once more. "Trust me."
I nodded, because I believed him. I could only imagine everything Atem has been through in his life to turn out the way he was. He must have been so neglected...so alone. Alone like me.
When I had first laid eyes on Atem, I had concluded that we were different in every single way. And it had taken me to this very second to realize that we weren't so different after all. Sure what we did and how we acted weren't exactly the same, but I was beginning to think that Atem was looking for the same thing that I was looking for.
Someone to share our pain with.
"Hey, Atem?"
Scarlet eyes glanced up to gaze into mine. "Yeah?"
"I think I'd like that kiss right about now."
I couldn't begin to explain the surprise that lit up every corner of Atem's chiseled face. But it was only for a moment, for the next thing I knew, his lips were on mine, filling me with warmth and something amazing.
His lips were always so perfect against mine, and the feelings I had for him only flourished with every second that passed. He pushed me back until my back was against the armrest. Then he moved his body onto me and formed against me, fitting into my every curve. He kissed me harder, and I let him. I allowed myself to give into him completely, because I didn't have enough energy to fight against what I was feeling. I knew I should still be angry with him for what he did to protect others, for keeping such an important thing from me, but I was in a moment of weakness, and he took advantage of that.
And I'm glad he did.
Because even though I wasn't ready to admit it out loud, I needed him. I needed someone to tell me what to do right now, because I had no idea. I needed someone strong to point me in the right direction, because I no longer knew where I was going. I needed someone to kiss me like Atem did, because his kisses made me feel wonderful.
His hands peeled my jacket off and pulled at the hem of my shirt. He pulled away, much to my displeasure, so that he could pull my shirt over my head. And then his lips were on mine once again. His hands traced my sides, touched my chest, slipped down my stomach...and pressed against my back, pulling me into him.
I gently raised my hands to wrap them around the silky tresses of Atem's hair, and I pulled him into me.
So now we were both pulling, and yet we were still not close enough. I wanted to mold against Atem. I wanted, just for a second, to be one with him, so that maybe I would be as strong as him...so that maybe I would stop hurting.
"What the fuck!"
My heart dropped. No. Not again. Please. This is all I have. Don't take it away from me.
But it was too late. Atem had heard him and had gotten off of me. I wanted to whimper at the loss of heat, but my pride wouldn't allow it.
I could hear them fighting...about me...about them. And I could hear the door slam shut with a loud bang. I looked up to see Atem fuming, and when he turned back to look at me, he narrowed his eyes and pointed at me. "Stay here, Yuugi," he said. "I'll be right back. Don't move."
I didn't have time to respond, because he ran out after him, closing the door behind him. I don't think I've ever wanted to cry out of pure frustration so much in my life. I was so ready to give myself to him, and God -- or whomever it was that had picked out my fate -- wouldn't even let me enjoy what could have been a beautiful experience.
I shook my head and leaned over the edge of the couch to pick up the blanket on the ground. I assumed Atem had been sleeping on the couch before I came, and I decided that that was just what I needed right now. More sleep.
I dozed off after ten minutes, but right before I did, I could hear the door opening again. I then felt someone push me closer to the back of the couch and lay down next me, a pair of strong arms wrapping around my middle. I buried my head under their chin and breathed in their scent; Atem's scent.
It was the best sleep I'd had in two months.
----
Ten Minutes Earlier
----
"Bakura!" Atem called out after him when he had finally caught up to the other. "Stop walking and talk to me."
"Why?" Bakura spun around on his heel and pinned Atem with a nasty glare. He raked a hand through his unruly white locks, pushing his bangs into his hair. "Shouldn't you be fucking your little plaything right now?"
"What the fuck is your problem, Bakura?" he asked, placing his hands on his friend's shoulders and pushing him back. "Why do you hate Yuugi so Goddamn much?"
"Me?" Bakura pushed him back; hard enough to make Atem stumble a little. "Well, excuse me, but the last time I checked you hated him, too! Next thing I know you're all over him all the time."
Atem shook his head, raising his hand to rub at his temples. "I told you it wasn't like that, Bakura. I just wanted to toughen him up. He was too vulnerable to be hanging out with us. He still doesn't know what he's getting into. I'm helping him like I helped you."
"Okay and, now that you have, you want to fuck him?"
"Why the hell do you care? Fuck, Bakura, you sound like you're fucking jealous or something." At Bakura's silence, Atem snapped his head up to look at him. "'Kura..."
"Don't fucking call me that!" Bakura hissed, taking a step towards him. "Ever since Yuugi showed up, you've completely forgotten about me."
"That's not true," Atem said, searching Bakura's face. "You can't honestly think that, Kura."
"Can't I?" Bakura asked, lifting a brow. "If you're not with him, you're talking about him. If you're not talking about him, you're probably thinking about him. Did you forget who it was that's been by your side for the past two years? Did you forget the fact that I got fucking kicked out of my house six months ago and now I have to live in this shithole, just because my family made me choose between you and them? My brother, Atem, my fucking brother. I left him 'cause you said that it'd always be you and me. You said we didn't needanyone else. And then Yuugi shows up and everything you said went to hell."
"That's not fair, Bakura. I never asked you to leave your family, that was your choice. You didn't like being told what to do so you left. You wanted to live your own life with no restrictions and now you got that. You can do whatever you fucking want, and no one will tell you otherwise." Atem said. He glanced towards the brick wall of the alleyway and sighed loudly. "You're my best friend...you need to know that...but Yuugi...I..."
"What?" Bakura sneered.
Atem snapped his eyes back to Bakura and glared at him. "I really like him, and I want to make this work. But I can't if you keep barging in and fucking everything up!"
Bakura stood in silence, searching Atem's face, before lifting his face towards the cool, winter sky and letting out a bitter bark of laughter. "Well, you don't have to worry about me fucking everything up anymore."
"Bakura--"
"No." He gave Atem a look, one that said to just give it up now because he was finished talking. And Atem, knowing that his friend was, indeed, done with the conversation for the current moment, closed his mouth and turned around. Bakura watched him walk back in the direction of the warehouse and, once he was out of sight, he spun around and walked in the opposite way.
He didn't move in any particular direction. It's not like he had anywhere to go. But walking is what he did to blow off steam and, even after hours passed and the sun had set, he was still walking. He had taken this time to himself to think about the situation at hand. He was aware, in some sense, that he was being slightly over-reactive, but he wasn't the type to cry or get upset over something like this -- or about anything really. He would just get angry. It was the only thing he really knew how to do.
Bakura let out an agitated sigh at the sharp pain shooting up his legs, his muscles cramping from the excessive walking. He stopped to stretch and glanced up to figure out what part of town he had wandered off to. His eyes narrowed at the familiar row of houses, and he craned his neck back to look up at the street sign above his head. He sighed again, his temples twisting with an oncoming migraine.
He thought about just turning around and walking down another street, but his curiosity got the best of him. So, he continued forward until he came to a familiar small, white house. He stopped in front of it and glanced at the doorstep. He wondered what his family was up; he wondered if they had taken down all the pictures of him; he wondered, if maybe, they forgot about him. Bakura snorted. He wouldn't be surprised. After everything he did, after how deep he had fallen, he almost expected them to pretend as if he never existed.
He scrunched up his face as a raindrop tapped his nose. A few more bounced off his jacket and, at the rate they were beginning to fall, he knew he would have to get inside soon. He glanced back at the house and slid his gaze to the half-opened window, his eyes locking onto his little brother, who was sitting at the kitchen table doing his homework. He watched him for a few minutes, his shoulders loosing some of it's burdensome weight, and suddenly he wasn't so angry with Atem. Maybe Yuugi made Atem feel like Ryou made him feel -- like things would somehow get better. Just seeing Ryou again gave him a little light in his life, as small as it was. Maybe that's what Yuugi did for Atem.
Bakura glanced back at the door and let out a deep breath. It was freezing outside, and he knew for a fact that if he knocked on the door, then his brother would welcome him with open arms and happy tears because he knew that Ryou missed him.
Probably as much as he missed Ryou.
But he wouldn't allow himself to drag his little brother down with him. The cynic in him knew there was no hope for him, even if his heart disagreed. He had thrown away his life the moment they moved to this horrible place, but he would do whatever he could from behind the shadows to keep Ryou from suffering the same fate. He would destroy anyone he deemed a threat. He would protect Ryou, just like he always had.
With that thought in his head, Bakura turned away from the window, and walked away from the house. He began to trace his way back to the warehouse. He would have to face Atem sooner or later. Why not just get it over with? He was jealous, yes. He was jealous of the amount of Atem's time Yuugi was taking away from him. It had always just been the two of them. He wasn't used to sharing Atem with someone else.
But he guessed he had no choice but to accept it, because he knew how much Atem cared for Yuugi. A lot more than he let on, that's for sure. They weren't best friends for nothing. He could see it written clearly on Atem's face.
Bakura picked up his pace as he took another turn, trying to escape the downpour of rain that had started as fast as he could. It was while he was running that he made the decision to apologize to Atem...and to slowly accept Yuugi. It would take time. But he'd do it if Atem cared about Yuugi as much as he presumed.
He was coming up on the last alleyway, only a few minutes away from the warehouse, when something hit the back of his head; so hard he almost couldn't feel it. He fell forward, catching his fall with his hands and scraping them against the pavement in the process. He inwardly scowled and opened his eyes to see the blood from his hands mixing with the flooding rain under him.
His vision blurred from the amount of pain in the back of his head, and he could feel a trail of blood trickle down his neck and drip off his chin. His body began to go numb, and he glanced at pools of rain around him, his eyes catching a shadow in one of the pools' reflection. Through his labored breathing, he could hear footsteps, and he reached up to grab the necklace dangling around his neck. And then he heard a loud bang echo off the alley walls and everything went black.
To Be Continued...
(1) OxyContin is the brand name of a time-release formula of oxycodone produced by the pharmaceutical company Purdue Pharma. By 2001, OxyContin was the best-selling non-generic narcotic pain reliever in the U.S.
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