Chapter 11
Ivan POV
Dimitri kept walking, not looking back at neither me nor Rose as he did. The door swung shut behind me, sending out a bang that sounded much louder in the now-silent room.
Rose didn't say anything for a long time – so long that I had been thinking about breaking the silence when finally, she spoke.
"He looks so much smaller…"
I looked at Luka, who did actually look very tiny on the big, clean, white bed.
"Yeah," I agreed, not sure what else to say. "He does."
"Ivan?" Rose suddenly asked, her voice sounding timid and quiet, so different to her usual bubbly, full of life self. I realised that it had been quite a while since she had sounded like her proper self. "Is there something I should know?"
"Something you should know?"
"About Dimitri. Has he-" she paused to swallow. "Has he been with someone else?"
I started.
"Dimitri?!" I repeated, not sure if I had heard correctly. When she didn't reply, I burst out laughing – not because I was laughing at her, just because the idea of Dimitri cheating on his girlfriend was more than freaking hilarious…because it would never happen.
Rose didn't look like she appreciated my mirth.
"He didn't cheat on me, did he?" She asked quietly, once I had quietened down.
"No, Rose, he didn't. I stayed at your place with a girl last night."
"Shit…" Her hands moved up and clasped two handfuls of her hair. "Shit."
"So you guys had a fight, what's the big deal?" I said to her. "It's about time; you guys have been way too lovey-dovey."
I turned to face her when she didn't answer.
"Rose? Are you okay?"
I took a step towards her and noticed that there were tears on her cheeks.
"Hey, hey, hey," I quickly pulled up a chair beside her and wrapped an arm around her . "Ssh…it's okay, Rose. Dimitri will forgive you, you know? He loves you way too much to let you go after a silly fight."
"It's not that – not really," she said, her voice cracking. "I just- I just don't feel like myself…I haven't since I gave birth. It's like I can't ever just feel happy. And none of the others have had a baby so they can't understand what I'm trying to explain."
"Maybe that's not such a bad thing," I told her. "It might be easier to talk to someone outside of our circle of friends."
"You think?"
"As long as you stop pushing Dimitri and your friends away, then yes, I think that's a good idea."
Rose was silent for a long time after that, her hand tracing Luka's tummy, lost in thought.
"You can go," she told me, suddenly looking up. "Dimitri's probably waiting for you. "We'll be fine here," she added, when she realised that I was about to protest.
"How about you go?" I suggested. "I'll stay with Luka."
Rose didn't look like she was too sure about leaving; her eyes were darting back and forth between me and Luka.
"We'll be fine," I assured her. "I'll call you if anything changes. You need to go find him and patch things up."
She stood up and gave me a tight hug. "Thank you," she whispered gratefully, before kissing Luka's cheek. "I'll see you in the morning, okay baby?"
I managed to get her out before she changed her mind, and then settled down in the seat she had previously been sitting in.
Luka slept peacefully that night, blissfully unaware of everything going on around him.
RPOV
Dimitri's car was gone when I reached the parking lot. I spent a little over ten minutes searching for my own car when I remembered that I hadn't driven it here in the first place.
I ran for a couple of blocks before finally coming across a cab that would take me back home. I didn't even look at the driver before I thanked him and threw him some cash.
I hurried up the stairs and started banging on the apartment door.
"Dimitri?" I yelled through the wood. "Dimitri, are you there? It's me."
There was no answer and I tried the doorknob…to find that it was unlocked. I swung the door open and called him once more. Again, there was no answer. I searched the entire apartment until I finally admitted to myself that he wasn't here.
"Shit…" I plopped down on the couch, feeling exhausted. How the hell had life gotten so bad so quickly?
I knew exactly why - God, or whoever was up there had decided I'd had enough happiness and it was only fair to take it away from me now. My turn was over.
After a couple of minutes of wallowing in self-pity, I mentally slapped myself and stood up.
No. No, I would not do this to myself. Of course I could be happy. But in order to be happy, I needed to go out and fix everything that I had blown over the past month. I thought of Lissa and what she would say if she were here beside me.
She would most definitely have hit me and told me to get my shit together and go find Dimitri. To not rest until I had.
A small smile graced my face; one that although small, gave me the push I needed to get up off of my ass and go find the love of my life.
I sprinted to the door, grabbed my keys and slammed it shut. I drove around the city, no exact destination in mind. I just drove, searching in every direction for Dimitri, his car, or something that would indicate where he was.
Finally, all of my driving paid off.
I spotted his black Grand Cherokee parked outside of a bar a couple of minutes away from our apartment. I didn't even bother parking my own car properly before jumping out and hurrying inside.
I didn't spot him straight away, making me wonder if it had been his jeep outside at all, but after a moment of scanning, I spotted him with his head down at the counter.
I walked over to him and was about to announce my presence when some other woman – who just happened to look like a total tramp – approached him and introduced herself.
I walked in curiosity (and a little jealously) as she tried to strike up a conversation. If you could even call it that. The bitch was all over him, touching his arm and even going as far as to try and whisper something dirty in his ear.
Fury raged through me and I was about to step in when Dimitri abruptly pulled away from her.
"Just leave me alone, okay?" he told her. I was shocked to hear a pleading tone in his voice. The woman really didn't look too happy about being brushed off so easily but somehow, I managed to catch her eye and she slinked off – no doubt to find some other hot guy to take her home.
My anger disappeared and turned to guilt as I watched Dimitri – who still hadn't a clue that I was here – sigh and bury his hands in his hair. I was about to say something to him when he abruptly downed the rest of his scotch.
Without having to say a word, the bartender approached him and poured him another glass, which Dimitri again, drank straight away. The bartender was about to refill it again when I stopped him.
"Hey," I said quietly, sitting myself in the stool beside Dimitri.
"Look, I told you, leave me alone." The hostility in his voice almost surprised me – Dimitri was not an aggressive person.
"It's just me," I told him, making him glance up in surprise, no doubt recognising my voice.
His shocked expression quickly turned to panic.
"What- Is it Luka? Why aren't you with him? Is he okay?" I hurriedly gave his warm hand a squeeze to stop him from having a heart attack.
"He's fine. Ivan's with him," I told him. "I wanted to see if you were okay."
Dimitri relaxed a little bit, but there was still a certain amount of tension in his muscles. He looked into his glass as if hoping some more alcohol had appeared.
"I'm fine."
"No, you're not."
Dimitri flagged down the bartender, silently signalling for another glass.
"Haven't you had enough?" I asked him nervously as he downed yet another glass.
"Was does it matter?" he retorted. "I'm obviously not responsible enough to look after you or Luka, so why should I be responsible enough to look after myself?"
"Dimitri, I'm sorry! Alright? I've been a mess and I accused you of something you didn't do because I've been so distant and I thought that maybe you'd had enough of me and my shit. And as for Luka, what happened was not your fault. What happened to him was going to happen whether you were there or not."
He didn't reply, but just stared straight ahead, his fingers playing with his now empty glass.
"Dimitri? Did you hear what I said?"
"Yeah," he replied quietly after a moment. "I heard."
"And?"
"And I can't believe you'd even think in the first place that I would cheat on you."
"But that's what I'm trying to say!" I exclaimed, perhaps a little too loudly but at this stage, I didn't care who heard me. "It's like I'm not me! I'm so full of these after-birth hormones that I don't feel like myself! I'm second-guessing every single thing I do, and everything everybody else does around me too! And then I saw you talking to that really pretty girl at the wedding – a girl who hadn't just given birth and wasn't acting all moody – and I thought that you going off with her was a very real possibility. You can't tell me that you never thought about it? When you were talking to her, you didn't think that maybe it would have been nice to just have some great sex, considering we hadn't in more than two months."
Dimitri looked scandalised.
"Rose, you have to believe me when I say this: that thought never crossed my mind. Not that night, nor any night since I met you. Plus, the only reason I was talking to her was because she was asking about Ivan; it was him that she wanted. Are you telling me that you had those urges?" I had to admit, he looked genuinely broken at the idea.
"Of course I didn't! But it's different for a guy. I'd just given birth! It was physically and mentally impossible for me to even think about having sex. You were free to do whatever you wanted, with whoever you wanted!"
With that statement, Dimitri spun around and gripped my shoulders.
"Rose, I've never been free. Ever since I met you, I've been completely captivated. There is no way out of this for me – and I don't want there to be, because I'm not going anywhere; not without you and Luka. I love you."
I felt a tear escape from my eye as he declared his love. For so long, I had hoped I would hear these words again, and now that he had said them, I felt like everything really would be okay again.
"I'm so sorry," My voice broke as more tears appeared. Dimitri wrapped his arms around me and held me tight to his strong body. I clung to him and cried – right there in the middle of the bar. It didn't matter though. All that mattered was that I was in Dimitri's arms again, and he would make everything okay.
"I've missed you," he whispered into my ear. We broke apart but were still close – probably too close for such a public setting.
"God, I've missed you too," I replied as best I could without breaking down again. "And I love you. And Luka. More than anything in the world."
"Then how about we go see him?" Dimitri suggested, standing up and stumbling a little. I couldn't help the giggle that escaped my mouth, despite our baby being in hospital.
"I think maybe we should head home first," I replied, throwing some cash on the bar and wrapping an arm around his waist to keep him upright. "You may need a shower and some sleep before going anywhere."
Dimitri didn't disagree and so I helped him into the passenger seat of his jeep while I then climbed in to drive. Not being used to it, I drove much more slowly and more carefully, all the while being very much aware of the fact that Dimitri was gazing at me.
We arrived back home and he leaned slightly on me as we ascended the stairs.
"You're so beautiful you know," he said, tracing his fingers along my cheek once we were inside the apartment.
"And you're so drunk," I retorted, laughing and leading him to our bedroom. He sat down on the bed while I went into the bathroom to switch on the shower.
"Come on," I said to him, walking back into the room and seeing that he had fallen back onto the bed. He groaned as I pulled him back up into a sitting position and began to undress him.
I finally managed to get him down to his boxers when he suddenly crushed his lips to mine.
"Dimitri," I warned, pulling back slightly. "Shower. Now."
"Shower with me," he whispered, placing a soft kiss on my shoulder. "We don't have to do anything, I just want to be close to you."
A little soft talk and a few kisses later, I agreed. We spent a lot longer than we should have under the hot water, but he was right. It was nice just to feel that closeness that had been lost for a little while again. We didn't have sex – that, I was sure my body wasn't ready for quite yet…but we very sensually shampooed each other's hair and scrubbed and explored one another's body's.
Eventually, when the water started to turn cold, we decided it was time to get out. I checked my phone and saw that Ivan had sent me text a little under twenty minutes ago, letting me know that everything was good and that he would stay with Luka for the night while we made up.
And so, knowing that our baby was in the best hands possible, Dimitri and I climbed into bed, me snuggling into his chest and him nuzzling into my hair.
For the first time since Luka had been born, we both slept peacefully, just holding one another in comfort and in love.
Happy now? xD
(quick note; those of you who are waiting for me to update my other stories, I will get to them, I promise! Just try and imagine having six different stories on the go - it's freaking difficult! It's my own fault really though :P I'm just going to focus on two of my stories at the moment, and one that I have not yet published [soon ;)] and then I will move to the others. It shouldnt take me too long.)
Love you guys, and review! :D
