Sorry that it has been such awhile since my last update. I've been grounded. But I'll make up for my missed time, expect 4 chapters hopefully tonight and 4 tomorrow. Enjoy

Dawn finally broke through the clouds. The light shined brightly on my face and with a groan I sat up and rubbed my eyes. A night full of tossing and turning and lack of sleep really wears out one's body. My paranoia had failed to wear off and yet I had to make it seem as though everything was fine so Raoul wouldn't catch on. I got out of bed and went into the bathroom. I turned the nozzle of the tub on so that the room was quickly full of the hot steam of the running water. I undressed and sat in the tub as the water filled around me. The water was scalding and my skin was turning red where ever it was touched by the hot water. But soon my tense and aching muscles gave into the warmth and let go of their anxiety. I poured salts into the bath hoping it would open my brain and give me time to think. What was Erik's aim? Why was he doing this to me? Why did he have to do this to my heart? I was finally beginning to believe that I would never see him! I wasn't looking around every corner hoping to get a glimpse of the end of his coat as he walked by. I didn't catch myself zoning out of conversations just to hope to hear his music. I was beginning to accept what had happened. My wounded heart was beginning to heal and then he had to invade my life again and rip the wound clear open.

I sat in the bath tub crying softly to myself. Suddenly there was a knock at the door. It was followed by a soft voice.

"Mother, are you almost done. I want to go explore. I want to go find Mr. Y!" And why was he so intent on my child. He wants to take him away from me but at the same time the last night he had been so kind and gentle with Gustave. He offered to show Gustave around the park and let his dreams run wild. He offered to take my child under his wing, the child he believed to be Raoul's. I shook my thoughts away and put my voice in control.

"Yes, Darling. I'll be out in a moment." I stood in the bath and grabbed the closest towel. It was black and it was made of the softest material I had ever felt. On the side a gold Y was embroidered. I could help my mind from slipping away to his bed and what it must be like now in this new world above land. Was it soft and light like the towel wrapped around my body or was it still the black silk I remembered wrapped around me 10 years ago. I had to get a grip. Erik wasn't the same man from the night. He was now the man that followed that morning. But even as I thought that I felt my breath catch as I thought of what he told me that night. Erik had left ashamed of what he was. He thought I would be disgusted by him and myself. He believed that I was going to leave him again. I understood then what that would be like. If I had to go through this pain twice I wouldn't survive. My entire soul would shatter from within. I would be nothing but an empty shell of broken pieces. I placed on my slip and laced my corset. I put on the white lace robe that I had since my days in the opera and slipped into my bedroom. Gustave was waiting for me on my bed, trying so hard to contain his joy. I walked over to the wardrobe and pulled out the first outfit I saw. It was a beautiful olive green skirt with a matching jacket and white blouse. It hit in all the right places making me look long and thin.

I slipped out of the robe and pulled on the blouse. It felt soft and light on my overheated skin. I could feel myself blush as I started to think of Erik's reaction to my outfit. Would he think I was beautiful as he once had when I was younger and talented? Once again I shook the thoughts of Erik from my mind and pulled the skirt over my head and pulled it down to my slender waist. What if he hated me? What if I disgusted him? He believed that I had conceived a child with Raoul, even once that thought had brought nausea to me. I pulled on the jacket and walked over to my mirror. I combed my brown curly hair. I had at once point been down to my waist, now it just went past my shoulders. Raoul had insisted after the wedding, that I cut it to look more like a noble Viscountess. I wish I hadn't followed through on his plans. I missed my hair. I pulled what remained of the long beautiful lock up with bobby pins letting two curls fall over my shoulder. I quickly placed and secured the beautiful hat that Raoul had bought me and turned around to face Gustave.

"Well how do I look?" His eyes shone bright with pride.

"You look so beautiful, so very beautiful." I laughed and went to his side. I picked up my handsome son and spun him around. He reminded me so much of Erik that heart couldn't help but ache every time I looked at him. I gently set him on the ground and grabbed his hand. We began to walk out the door until I remembered what I was forgetting. I turned around and walked to the piano and grabbed Erik's sheet music and left the hotel with my precious boy at my side. When the carriage brought us to Mr. Y's big tent, I started looking through the music once more. People were already starting to prepare for tonight's performance. Gustave was becoming restless as he absorbed the excitement and chaos around him. Pretty soon he was running around the workers, chasing a small child dressed as a black cat, as they rushed to get their jobs done before, I can imagine, they had to talk to the boss. I wondered how scared they were of Eri- of Mr. Y.

"Slow down Gustave! There are people working here. Be careful!" My paranoia was coming back and my having to chase after my child wasn't helping. He looked up at me with earnest eyes.

"But I want to find Mr. Y and go see the island." How was I to keep my child away from Eri- Mr. Y? Did I even have the right to do so?

"I'm sure he'll send for you when he's ready." Suddenly a familiar voice came from behind me. I turned to see Raoul talking to Dr. Gangle. He was holding a rather large folder and wearing a rather irritated expression.

"Who is this Mr. Y? What does he do, apart from spending ludicrous amounts of money on light entertainment?"

"Father, look over there!" Gustave ran off and Raoul started after him.

"Gustave slow down!" I was looking off into the direction they had just left when another voice filled my ears. It had been a long time, but I knew that I knew that voice.

"Heaven help me, could it be? No it couldn't possibly!" I turned and saw a woman staring at me in shock.

"Sorry do I-" I looked up from my music in confusion. Who was this woman?

"Yes I think you do."

"Have we-"

"Go on take a guess." Suddenly it hit me. I was staring at my beloved friend, Meg Giry. Meg and I had grown up together in the Opera Populaire. At one point we danced side by side bright and starry eyed. I ran to embrace her.

"Wait it can't be! Is it-"

"Yes!"

"Oh my god I can't believe it's you!" She pulled back from my hug to look at me.

"Look at you Christine, regal as a queen and beautiful." I looked at Meg. She was wearing a small skimpy bathing suit with blue polka dots on it. I never would have imagined innocent little Meg in such a costume but as I looked up I could see her face beaming with pride. She had grown to be such a beautiful woman and her smile was contagious.

"Meg and you as well, I could hardly tell it's you." We hugged once more, so extremely excited over the reunion.

"My dear old friend, can't believe you're here old friends."

"After all this time."

"Christine you came! You look sublime!" I looked at my dear friend.

"You look the same."

"My sweet old friend, didn't think we'd meet again."

"What of your career?"

"Everything's great!"

"And isn't fate a splendid thing!"

"It brought me here."

"To see the sights?"

"And sing!" As soon as I said the words I wished I hadn't. Meg's face fell and she turned to hide it a moment too late. Suddenly there were girls all around me giggling and asking for autographs. I tried to reach out Meg and ask her what was wrong but the crowd surrounding me was too thick to see through. After signing many autographs the crowd dispersed. I turned back to Meg.

"Sorry did I hear you right? Here to sing?"

"Tomorrow night-"

"That seems weird there must be some mistake. That's the leading lady's spot. I've been booked-" And then I realized what Meg was saying. Eri- Mr. Y had booked me over poor darling Meg.

"Oh surely not."

"This was meant to be my big break." She fell onto the rehearsal piano's bench clearly broken by the day's change in plans. I sat down next to her and put my arm around her trying to reassure her.

"Look, I hardly sing, just one little thing, and aria." She looked up at me with tears threatening to spill from her eyes.

"Christine, it's a thrill just to share the bill with you. My dear old friend, it's becoming clear old friend, someone's overlooked his leading act." I pulled her into another embrace. One of the stage hands asked us to move from our spots at the piano's bench. He moved his ladder closer and we quickly jumped out of his way. The man he was working with left him to come talk to me about my singing. As I looked up from the sheet music we were discussing I noticed Raoul talking to Madame Giry. He looked very angry and stressed out. I was worrying for him and for Madame Giry. I rushed quickly to his side before anything could happen to her.

"Darling, please are you alright."

"Tell me now this music, who was its creator." He grabbed my wrist with so much force I thought it would snap. As Madame Giry's gazed slid down to his grip on me I suddenly felt self concicous and embarrassed of my husband's actions.

I looked into his eyes and whispered, "Darling, please don't squeeze so-" But he quickly cut me off.

"Something's going on here. I'll deal with you later." He threw my arm down and turned to storm out of the tent. But he suddenly turned back to me. "The truth will out before we're through." It was almost a threat and it made me shutter. He walked past me to Meg. And Madame Giry came to where I stood. I found comfort in her old familiar, and very knowledgeable, face.

"My dear old friend, can't believe you're here old friend."

She pulled me close but something about her was rougher and more aggressive than I remembered. "My dear Christine."

"What does this mean?" I heard Raoul from behind me asking Meg, "What does he want." I turned to comfort him.

"My grand old friend, I don't understand old friend." Madame Giry and Meg both turned to me.

"Maybe it's joke"

"Some silly game." For some reason I found myself trying to comfort them as well. But I didn't believe for one second that a man that could kill so he could get his way, would set up some silly old game.

"And what his game is in the end, I can't claim to comprehend, old friend" Suddenly the room started to get smaller and the stress was making me sweat.

"I need some air."

I heard Raoul's voice to my left, "I need a drink." I turned to comfort him. I couldn't stand when he got upset because of me. I also couldn't stand the embarrassment I suddenly felt for him. But we both ended up turning to Meg and Madame Giry.

"My poor old friend, isn't this a poor old end."

I turned to Madame Giry and tried to tell her I was okay. I guess I was hoping that if she thought I wasn't nervous that she wouldn't be. "I'm still, at bay." As I turned from her to go to Meg, Raoul passed me and glared into my eyes, muttering, "I'm feeling used."

Meg grabbed my hands and spun me around singing to me.

"And yet let's not get upset old friends."

Madame Giry tried to comfort everyone. "We can sort this out."

Raoul murmured, "I'm sure we will."

Meg reassured him, "Without a doubt."

"Because we're still such grand old friends. Grand old friends with everyone. Isn't this great?"

"Won't this be so much fun?" Meg's bubbly spirit got to me and my nerves began to disappear.

"With two old friends just a ball and two old friends." We were holding hands and the tension began to slip away.

"Let us raise a glass." Madame Giry lifted poured everyone a glass of scotch.

"To times gone by." I feeling of dread washed over me as I saw Raoul pick up his glass. Meg and Madame Giry were calming though.

"To Mr. Y." I knew the words slipped out in anger but everyone turned to looked at Raoul who had brought up everyone's source of anxiety and frustration again.

Meg shook of Raoul's words and sought to comfort everyone. "To happy ends."

We all broke from our shock and anger towards Raoul's words to finish the toast. "To such sincere, and very dear old friends." Everyone looked down at their glass before setting back down on the table without a single sip.

"No offence but I need something stronger." And with that Raoul turned to leave for the bar. I rushed after him.

"Raoul…" He turned back making sure to only address the Madame Giry and Meg.

"Madame I shall see surely see you at the concert tomorrow. Where I am sure you both shall surpass yourselves. Good day." And turned and left.

"Raoul… Please. I can explain!" I couldn't help but raise my voice. I turned around blushing embarrassed for both of our behaviors. "I'm sorry. Meg would you mind, Gust? Gustave!" I was so confused and frustrated with the things happening around me I forgot about Gustave. He was nowhere in sight. He's disappeared here on Coney Island. Vanished! Meg looked at me confused.

"What's wrong?"

"My son! He was with… Gustave?! Gustave!" I ran off looking for my son. I could hear footsteps behind me followed by Meg's voice calling my name. She finally caught up to me behind the stage.

"You have a son? What?" She was trying to gather her breath along with her thoughts. I slowed my pace so she could keep up.

"Meg, my son, Gustave is missing. If Er- If Mr. Y finds him… Oh God!"

"Christine, it's okay. He's not like he used to be." She stopped walking and stood looking in the distance. "He's kind Christine. I can see how you fell for him."

"I did no such thing! I have a husband! How can you say such things?" I was so flustered with my feelings for Erik. I couldn't admit them let alone except them. But what did she mea… Oh my God! I knew there was something about Meg… Something different… Something strange. Meg Giry my childhood best friend had fallen in love with the love of MY life. I stopped and planted my feet where I stood. How dare she! Erik was the father of my child! The love of my life! How dare she have a single loving or even adoring thought about him! It was HIS music in MY hands. I doubt he would ever trust her with such an honor! I shook my head. What was I thinking! Erik left me. He wasn't ready to love me or my child. Erik hadn't been a part of my or our child's life for 10 years. Why was I so angry at Meg? Erik wasn't mine anymore. Erik hadn't been mine since the day I chose Raoul in the lair. And he couldn't be no matter how many times I told myself.

My eyes adjusted back to reality. The anger from my body drained. I could see Meg's confused expression but I pushed out of my mind and turned around continuing my search. "Meg, I do not have times to discuss such things with you. I need to find my son." We looked through the entire main tent coming up short. We then ventured on into the freaks' quarters. There we found no sign of my darling Gustave. As we walked out of the backdoor I fell to my knees and began to cry. How could he just disappear. My darling boy. Oh I wished Erik and Gustave could have met 10 years ago. I wished Gustave would have known a loving father instead of Raoul. I wished that Gustave could have grown up in a house of love and a house of music, place he could have been himself and not been yelled at and put down for who that was. Suddenly I heard a scream but it wasn't any scream. It was the blood-chilling scream from my boy's mouth. I got up and wiped my face in one swift movement.

There's something about when a mother's child is in need. A mother's instincts take over and she finds herself standing right in front of her child moments later. I ran and ran and didn't know where I was going but I knew who I was going to. When I reached my destination I yelled for Gustave and felt the instant comfort when his arms wrapped around my legs and his head buried itself into my waist. I grabbed his face and kissed him on his forehead. He kept murmuring something over and over again. Once I pulled his face out of my waist I heard the words.

"It's horrible, horrible." I pulled him back into my embrace and hushed his cries.

"Shhhh. Don't be frightened." Suddenly a voice came from behind me. Erik. A shiver ran through my body from hearing voice.

"How could you think I wouldn't guess?" I turned and Gustave ran behind my back. Erik walked towards me. He was clearly angry. His shoulders were hunched over, his wig was gone but his mask was in its place. "How could you think I wouldn't know? Do you have something to confess? I want the truth right now if so…" He was hurt and upset and I wanted to hold him and tell him everything was okay. Gustave was beginning to pull me away by the arm. Everything became clear. Erik realized the truth and showed his true face to his true son. But that face must have scared poor Gustave. I turned to Gustave then.

"Listen Darling, I want you to with Miss Giry back to the hotel. Alright? I have to talk to Mr. Y alone. Meg?" As I turned I saw Meg walking towards Erik attempting to reach out to him. He was hiding himself from her yet she tried to comfort him. She was attempting to show him that she accepted him. "Meg! Please would you mind? Please? Please?" She reluctantly turned towards me and took Gustavé's hand. I thanked her as she walked away. I turned back to where Erik was. He didn't show a bit of anger. He only looked hurt and betrayed. "Once upon another time you loved me, yet left me alone. But that's not all you did. You left me with a son." Hearing those words he fell to his knees and began to sob. "Ever since that other time I wished that you could somehow have known. I kept the secret hid, the secret my marriage forbid. What else was I to do? We love…"

"A son…" his voice cracked through his heavy sobbing.

"We love…"

"My son…" He was so hurt. He hunched over.

"Just give what I could give and take what little I deserved." I walked over to him and gently placed my hand upon his scared head. I could feel his pain as it traveled up through my arm into my soul. He placed his hand on top of mine and brought it down to his soft cheek.

"Forgive me." The words were barely audible through his sobs. But they were strong enough to make me jump and devastatingly sad enough to break the last intact part of my heart. "He sees me and shuns me, as you did once. Take him now, take him and go." I couldn't wrap my head around what he was saying. But I understood why the words came from his mouth. "Go now. Be free, but swear one thing to me. He will never ever know." There was nothing for me to do. Gustavé's fear of his father would just be a sword finding its way deeper into Erik every time he saw Gustave. I couldn't allow that pain in Erik's life, but how could I deny him the happiness and love a child brings to their parent. I had to do what was best for Erik. I had to do everything he asked for him.

I turned to leave and whispered the words as I left, "I swear it. Believe me, you know you have my word." And then I stopped. There was one thing on this earth that I could offer Erik, one thing that would bring him eternal joy. I turned back to him and gave him my soul, "And I swear this music won't remain unheard! This music, your music will live again, one last time just as I swore." He stood and looked at me. I could see the love fill his face. I picked up the music I had dropped when Gustave ran into my arms. I leaned down and picked it up and walked back to him handing it to him.

"And soul to soul we will once more be whole."

"When I hear you sing…." The power in his voice was overwhelming and I fought the urges within me as they crept up.

"Once more." And with that I turned and ran from him before they could get another chance to overpower me.