GASP! IT'S AN UPDATE! Amazing, no? Feel free to pelt me with rotten tomatos for beeing a lazy terrible and altogether evil authoress for not updating this earlier.
On another note, KISH VS. COOKING HAS 54 REVEIWS!!!! This may not sound like alot to most of you (far better) fan fiction authors/esses, but that's four more than what I got for my (GAWD AWFUL) Inuyasha story that I wrote...EONS ago that I utterly LOATH with every fiber of my being because it is so STUPID and terribly written. And as you probaly have noticed Inuyasha fanfiction is insanely more popular, and let's face it, a large portion of TMM fanfiction is crappy, terrible Mary-sue filled garbage that most like to write and few bother to read, so to get so many reveiws from a less popular fandom is amazing. Not to say that I haven't written any of that type of fanfiction...-shifty eyes-
Anyways, I'll stop rambling now. ON TO THE (LAST) CHAPTER!!!!
Kish Vs. Cooking
Chapter Ten (which I should have written AGES ago...)
Kish stared at Q. "You suck." He stated bluntly.
"But...WHY???" Q wailed in an over-dramatic fashion.
"This chapter was due ages ago, and the last two chapters were filler. Really bad filler, I may add."
The baka authoress paused for a moment."I'm SORRRRY!!!!" She glomped her faithful readers, plus Pai (who really was close to getting a concussion), Kish (who looked quite alarmed), Tarto (who was still convince that the kitchen was haunted((see chapter two)) and Gabrielle (who really shouldn't have been in there because she/it was rather...unsanitary)
"Anyways today we're making..." Q whipped out her handy (dandy) reveiw list. "Cupcakes, pizza, and birthday cake. Hmm, coulda sworn the list was longer before. OH WELL. With us will be KisshuFanGirl, Mew-Sahara, and SAKURA1234, SassyDragon and Lula-san." Q nodded importantly, feeling very...important... "And Bowleena, Pai" Pai looked possitively horrified at this "and Tarto because it's the last chapter!"
Gabrielle tugged on Q's sleeve, how she managed this amazing feat (so amazing due to the fact that Gabrielle is made of a bunch nasty stuff from the back of the fridge and has no hands), no one will ever know. NEVER, NEVER I TELL YOU! NEVER! MWAHAHAHA!!!
Evereyone in the room gave Q a cautious look as she randomly burst in to manical laughter.
"Q, I wanna be in this chapter tooooo!"
"You're a blob of goo that was food at one point."
"SO? THAT'S RACEISM!" Gabrielle declared indignatly, and if she had them she probaly would have put her hands on her (non-existant) hips.
"You were food at one point...You cooking would be like...FOOD CANABILISM!"
Gabrielle stared at Q's strangely warped logic.
The poor logic, Q must have left it out in the sun again.
"Besides," Q continued, nodding sagely, feeling very...Sagely. "Didn't you die in the last chapter?"
Gabrielle blinked. "Oh yeah..." She said.
And then she exploded.
Everyone stared at the spot where bloob-of-DOOM-y-goo-Gabrielle had stood...oozed...EXISTED a second previously.
"Well..." Tarto stated slowly. "That was...odd." Then he fainted from shock.
And then Q's messed up logic shattered, sending bits of logic flying. A particularily large piece hit Pai on his over-abused noggin.
He fell over, he had been knocked out again.
"Jeeze!" Q exclaimed. "Just when my logic broke, the worlds logic starts to work again!'
"Would someone like to take Tarto and Pai to the hospital?" Kish asked boredly, waiting for the plot to hurry up and arrive; honestly 382 words and no plot.
"KisshuFanGirl and SassyDragon will!" Q exclaimed (again...where's my thesaurus when you need it?)
The two reveiwers blinked. They had been volenteered for something without beeing asked. THEY ACTUALLY, GASP, GOT TO DO SOMETHING! HURRAH!
They happily walked off screen, draging Pai and Tarto off in the direction they presumed the HOSPITAL OF DEATH, little did they know, they were actually heading towards the...(insert Q trying desperatly to think up something funny. Her brain just blew a gasket! OH NO!) ...CITY OF TOWNSVILLE!
Yes. Q did just make a Powerpuff Girls and a Blues Clues reference in the same chapter. Someone please shoot her.
The remaning people, plus one alien, just sat. And existed. Because you can't just stop existing simply because you want to.
"Well!" Q exclaimed indignantly. Why indignantly, you may ask. She exclaimed indignantly, instead of peeved, because it's is a funny word. Please, those of you that still have a little of your sanitly left, don't atttempt to understand that last sentence, it will steal your remaining sanity. And possibly your socks.
Anyways, where were we? Ah yes... "Well!" Q exclaimed indignatly. "We'll have to start without Bowleena! She's late! Very late! HOW DARE SHE BE LATE FOR SUCH AN IMPORTANT CHAPTER! HOW DARE SHE?" Q grabbed Kish by the shoulders and started shaking him roughly. "HOW DARE SHEEEE??"
Kish shoved Q, who continued to wail 'how dare she', off of him
"HOW DARE SHE?" Q shouted to the heavens.
"Er...easily?"
"Eh. Probaly." Q nodded intellectually, feeling very...intellectual?
Q shrugged. "Let's start!"
"No!" Mew-Sahara declared. "Let's STOP!"
"SURE!" Q agreeded exuberantly.
"...how do we stop if we haven't started?" SAKURA1234 asked sounding somewhat confused and... sane...
"GASP! You still have LOGIC! AND SANITY! How DO you do it?"
"Er...easily?" Lula-san guessed bemusedly, tilting her head to one side.
"You copied my very intelligent and...SMART statement! I'd say 'gasp how could you' and then someone else would say 'er...easily' but that would be the third time. And that's over-quoting!"
"Says who?" Q demanded...feeling very...demanding...
"Some dead guy?" Kish guessed.
"THIRD TIME'S THE CHARM!" Q shouted unexpectedly. Everyone else felt very...unexpected...
"The charm of what?" Kish asked.
"You?"
"Me?"
"Yes you!"
"Me what?"
"ME ME!" The newly reformed Gabrielle shouted before dissapearing magically again.
Everyone blinked...feeling very...oh I give up...
In the city of TOWNSVILLE
"I TOLD you, we're going the wrong way!" KisshuFanGirl declared.
"I knew we shouldn't have used MapQuest..." SassyDragon mumbled.
"Where the fritter cookies ARE we?" Tarto asked loudly.
"HEY! YOU WOKE UP!" SassyDragon and KisshuFanGirl blurted in unison.
"Pai isn't though. I think he's in a coma..." KisshFanGirl stated.
"Well, he has been hit on the head quite a few times." SassyDragon
"HEY IT'S MOJO JOJO!" Tarto shouted pointing upwards at an almost painfully akward angle.
"And the PowerPuff Girls!" Added Gabrielle who disapeared magically again.
In the Kitchen of...(Doom...death...uhh) Diabolical...ness?
"Hey, Q..."
"Yeeees, Kish?"
"...you're weird."
"I'm fairly sure we've eptablished this. What were you going to say?"
"What in glarx name is that oddly-shaped snowman doing in the kitchen?"
"Because it CAN." Mew-Sahara said proudly.
The snowman snorted. "You think I WANT to be in this stupid kitchen? HUH? Dop ya? HUH? HUH? HUUUUH?"
Everyone stared at the outraged snowman.
"Um...no?" SAKURA1234 said after a long moment of akward silence.
"Actually I do!" The snowman said cheerfully.
"WHY?" Kish asked loudly"WHY in the name of Pai's pink teaddybear would ANYONE...thing...actually WANT to be in this horror of a kitchen?"
The snowman turned to Lula-san. "He's nuts isn't he?"
TOWNSVILLE
KisshuFanGirl, SassyDragon and Tarto, accompanied by the coma-ifyed Pai walked down the streets of Townsville searching for (the non-existant) Hospital of DEATH. Which you may notice is a very stupid name to give a hospital, and a more suiting one would be probaly something along the lines of the hospital of sunshine, lollypops and rainbows. But no, the morons that named the hospital named it the Hospital of DEATH.
"I think," Tarto stated in a very...stating voice, feeling very...stately? "that we're going the wrong way."
"NONSENSE!"
-One minute later-
"I think we're going the wrong way."
"ARRRRG!!!"
Kitchen of Diabolical-ness
Q, Kish, SAKURA1234, Lula-san and Mew-Sahara had finally started to cook, sans KishuFanGirl and SassyDragon, Bowleena, Tarto and Pai.
Though it was more of a food fight than actual cooking.
Kish was throwing eggs at everyone and their Aunt Sally (whom he was actually good friends with)
Q was alternating between wailing about how Bowleena was late and shooing Gabrielle out of the kitchen continuously.
Lula-san was singing a song that had to do with plastic pumpkins and flowers whilts spraying vanilla extract at everyone.
Mew-Sahara was hiding behind a counter, refusing to be apart of such nonsense, and eating the chocolate.
SAKURA1234 was trying (in vain) to steal some of the chocolate and was also dumping flour and salt in peoples hair.
They all looked somewhat like ghosts now. Tarto (if he ever returned) would surly be traumatized for life by this scene.
And the snowman? Ah, yes the snowman...has dissapered. Perhaps it was with Gabrielle.
"WE'RE BACK!" KisshuFanGirl and SassyDragon shouted proudly, still draging Pai.
Tarto took one look at the kithcen, let out a rather girly scream and ran off screen.
At that moment Bowleena (acompanied by various rabid salt 'n' vinegar chips and Satoshi plushies) fell from the ceiling.
"I'M HERE Q! YOU CAN START THE CHAPTER-" She stoped and binked, taking in the odd scene in front of her.
"You- you- YOU STARTED WITHOUT ME!" She bawled. "Houw could Youuuuuu?"
Tarto (who had magically apeared again) opened his mouth to say something
"Don't say it!" Kish shouted
"But-"
"No!"
"I-"
"NO!"
Tarto glared at Kish. As soon as Kish's back was turned he muttered 'easily'
"You started without meeee!" Bowleena was now shaking Q by the shoulders much in the same fashion as Q had with Kish earlier.
"You were with us in spirt!" Kish added cheerfully from behind the two odd people.
Bowleena released Q. "Well, ok then!"
"So..." Kish said to Q "Is the chapter over now? We didn't really cook anything. Just threw food."
Bowleena shrugged. "Close enough."
"I didn't really lear to cook you know."
"Do you really want to?"
"...No..."
And then Gabrielle threw the neon green cookbook of DOOM at Kish's head and everything faded to black.
Kish sat up in bed.
"Well, that was an odd dream." He mumbled, wondering why the back of his head hurt so much.
He walk into the kitchen. It was a disaster area; flour and salt was all over the floor. Vanilla extract was splashed on the walls, leving ugly stains everywhere. Eggs well on the celling and the shells were laying broken on the floor. Chocolate dribblets lay behind a counter. There were what looked like footprints on the counters.
In the midst of it all lay an bright green book, labeled 'The Neon Green Cookbook of DOOM'
Kish shuddered at the name, it sounded familiar.
He picked it up and a note fell out.
Dear Kish,
I thought you'd like something after all your troubles in the kitchen.
Have fun cleaning!
from,
Q and her army of rabid chips
Bowleena and her plushies
Gabrielle and her new best friend/obsession the un-named snowman
The wonderful reveiwers KisshuFanGirl, Mew-Sahara, and SAKURA1234, SassyDragon and Lula-san
Kish stared at the book for a moment.
A slightly crusty egg fell from the ceiling and hit Kish on the head.
"Oh for the love of GLARX!"
THE END
A/N (again)
I appologise for the crappyness, the weirdness, and any other ness-es you can think of. This was rushed and I had next to no time to correct it. Sorry.
Thank you to everyone that reveiwed. I worship you forever and ever.
In the end I somehow re-read all my reveiws I got for this story. That's what inspired me. Thanks for all the support!
I'm going to be taking a break, and probaly will disapear off of fanfic dot net. I have school and a life (GASP!) so that needs to be dealt with (stupid reality) I'll try and come back soon!
-Fnick AKA Q AKA authoress
