I walked to the front window and pushed back the curtain. Could it be true that we had been partners? And if so, why couldn't I remember him at all? I sighed, not that I could recall much right now anyway. I continued to watch him slam shut his car door and sit in it, his head against the steering wheel. I stared too long. Enough to know he had been crying. I felt the lurching again.

"Just close the curtain." Rosalie placed her hand on my shoulder. "He'll live."

"Who is he really, Rose? Don't lie to me." She contemplated it and rolled her eyes. She seemed to love doing that quite often.

"He's Edward Cullen. The liar, the cheater, the master manipulator, the "I'm straight- no, I'm bi- no, I'm gay- no, I'm bi" guy. He hurt you Jasper, so badly. He hurt me and his sister, and brother, even his parents. You were right to break up with him."

I took this all in and it wasn't making sense. "So he was my boyfriend?" I said softly, a question but more of a statement.

"Yes. Don't tell Mom I told you, 'kay?" I turned away from her and walked to the couch, flopping down on it.

"How'd Mom pay for all of this? The house is incredible."

I looked around in awe at the inside of it. Chandeliers hung in nearly every part that I could see. We had a great oak bookshelf full of all the stories I enjoyed. No one else was really a reader so I knew that had to be one of my many presents. A grand piano stood in the dining area. I didn't like it. I hated that darn piano for no reason at all once I noticed it there. In my head I heard distant melodies and laughter, but I couldn't get to the voices. I shut my eyes.

"Breathe, Jas!" I gasped some air into my lungs quickly. Some how I had ended up laying down on the sofa. My mother's face came into focus, stricken with panic. I sat up and then sat back, the room beginning to spin.

"What happened?" I breathed slow and deep, willing the room to stand still.

"You passed out." Rosalie interjected. "Remember…transferring from the wheelchair to the couch?"

Her tone was suggestive and I took it.

"Yes, I remember. I got up too quickly."

"Well, don't scare us like that again. We've all been scared enough." Mom's face relaxed.

"Yes ma'am."

"Hungry?" Before I could answer 'not really' she was gone in a flash.


Restlessly I tossed. I wasn't used to having such a spacious bed or room for that matter. That I knew. I sighed and angrily fluffed my pillow. Something was missing. My phone buzzed on the nightstand and the guy from earlier face popped up. I opened up the message and blinked.

Coming up.

What's coming up? I jumped, startled, at the sound of my window flying open and the picture turned into the human form as a person climbed through. I sat there dumbfounded at his ragged appearance. A far cry from what he looked like earlier. His 5 o'clock shadow definitely needed tending to.

"Jasper it's me, Edward." He whispered.

"I know that. I lost most of my memory from the past but I still recall the present. I'm not stupid." My sarcasm shocked him.

"I'm sorry…" I felt like I should run and hide from this male who probably was about the same age as I. My legs wouldn't move. Not because they couldn't but because I was semi curious about him. Even if invisible danger signs flashed neon bright around him. He sat down on the edge of my bed. "Can I just…well we… I just want to sleep next to you. Like old times. Give me a little to adjust to you not needing me here when you sleep."

I frowned deeply. Maybe that was part of my restlessness, I probably had overnights with him since we had been boyfriend and well, boyfriend. I wasn't sure why I agree but the words slipped past my lips before I realized. His ear-to-ear grin was dashing as he slipped in beside me. I felt relaxed and comfortable. I frowned even more when he scooted up behind me and wrapped his arm around my waist, pulling me closer. I lay there unmoving. My mind racing. What was I doing? Was it even normal to not shy away from his touch? I didn't know him.

After an hour of listening to his soft breathing I found the courage to sneak away. I sat on the side of my new bed watching him for minutes. He shifted onto his back and I noticed a slight bulge in his pants. I blinked, unsure of what I might be seeing.

I took the time then to study him from head to toe. He had a nice array of bronze hair. It was all over the place, which made him seem innocent. His almost cherubic yet masculine face made me gasp. His cheeks weren't chubby like a cherub though, just flushed. His lips were a nice deep red. He could've been a model.

I continued downward. His shoulders were broad for his body size in a way that was just right. Even though he had a lean frame, it was all corded with muscle. His wife beater fit him snug and his shorts were loose which wasn't doing him any favors on containing his sleep-induced boner. His legs were nice for a guys and his feet complimented them nicely. I winced. I had to be gay to think something like that. Why couldn't I remember him?

I crawled on the bed closer to him. So it's true, curiosity probably did kill the cat. He shifted and just my luck his mouth collided with mine. I know I should've pulled away but I needed to make all my nine lives worth it. On second thought…

I shifted away from him a moment before his mouth found mine again. Crushing my lips in a demanding kiss. His eyes were open now but hazed with lust. I didn't mean to respond but I instantly hardened when he grinded into the front of me and stuck his tongue into my mouth.

I pushed my hands against his chest and he didn't relent. He was like a starved man, hungry for..me? His teeth nibbled on the sensitive part of my neck and I shivered. This was good, what ever it was. He couldn't be bad if he made me feel this nicely. I felt his warm hands pushing my boxers down. I bit my lip. I didn't really know what to do at this moment.

I groaned when his hand wrapped around where I throbbed, lightly stroking the flesh of my head with the pad of his thumb. I wanted to stop this insanity but I couldn't remember ever feeling this way before. I bucked my hips, I needed more friction. I was so close to something, I didn't know what.

First it was his warm, soft fingers around me, then his warm and wet mouth. I didn't even notice him moving down my body. I looked down and it was noticeable where he had bit and sucked me. I whispered his name with out recognizing that I had. Lights danced behind my eyes and my hand slipped into his hair. I cried out and he placed his hand over my mouth.

"I'm not ashamed …" I saw him. His hand over my mouth. Then the memory quickly jumped to a video. Then the fall out: the car crash.

"No." I pushed against his head. He continued and I arched my back trying to stop the feelings rolling through me. "No!" I said more authoritative and I pushed harder. He looked up and released me from his mouth. Just that tiny friction sent me into a soaring but brief orgasm. It was bittersweet and I cried when I exploded over his face. I couldn't clean up or cover up, all I could do was cry.

"You remember don't you?" I could only nod when he wiped his face with his shirt. He sat up and ran a hand through his hair. "Shit. You want me to go?" I cried harder. The sad part was that I didn't.

"Why?" I croaked out, it sounded strained.

'I can't even begin to tell you. I was jealous and delusional. That's all I can say. I'm sorry."

"You never loved me did you?" I whimpered when he grabbed my hand.

"I did, I do. Let me show you. Please, let me show you. I came out Jasper. I wanted to share it with you but I couldn't. Every one knows about us, what we had, what we don't have any more. My father knows. I don't fucking care. I just want you."

I tried to remember other things but I came up blank. All I could remember was the things pertaining to him. The pain that he brought with him.

"You want to prove you've changed, Edward? Get out." My eyes squinted at the images of all his manipulations crossing my mind. Despair clouded his eyes and he quickly left the way he came. I was lost as to why he didn't argue with me.


I paced the room, trying to control my limp. Alice watched me unsure. She was pretty, I just noticed. Like, really pretty. I stirred in my jeans. I was so confused. Maybe I was the bi one. I watched her twiddle her thumbs and for some reason I wondered what her palm felt like. I stopped pacing and ogled the curves of her calf as she bounced one of the legs she had crossed.

I remembered her now. We had sex, lots and lots of it. So I was bi? Funny that was the only thing of her I could remember. But only in scattered bits. Our first night had happened to get back at Edward, but it had been good. I enjoyed it even if I felt guilty.

"What?" She laughed.

"I was just noticing how amazing you look in that dress. And for the life of me, I'm trying to figure out why I want to see you out of it. If I'm gay or what have you, I wouldn't want to." I didn't mean to be so bold but I couldn't help it. That was one plus, I was more outspoken now.

"So you really want to see me out of it?" Her jaw dropped.

"This time, I guarantee you, that I would love to do more than that."

BWAHAHAHHA say what? What the heck is wrong with my Jasper : ( LOL