Reminder on the Roles:

Hamlet—Julius ; Claudius—Blood ; Ophelia—Alice ; Horatio—Boris ; Laertes—Ace ; Polonius—Elliot ; Rosencrantz and Guildenstern—Twins ; Gertrude—Vivaldi ;

Player—Gowland ; Ghost—Nightmare ; Fortinbras—Gray ; Other—Pierce and Faceless ; Narrator—Peter

*Quick formatting note: Normal type=play until otherwise noted. Italics="real life". Characters' names will be typed out the first time they appear in a scene, then followed with the appropriate abbreviations. Also, I will use Shakespeare's character names (mostly) for action in the brackets; if you get lost, refer to the list up above. Hopefully this clears up any confusion you may be having while reading. Enjoy!


Ch. 11 Act 2 and Finale

The lights dimmed, the crowd hushed. The room was filled with silent anticipation as the crowd excitedly awaited the second part of the play. The curtain opened. The spotlight clicked onto the left corner of the stage, where Peter stood with a rolled out scroll, and smiled up at the crowd.

Peter: Good evening, once again. A quick message before the second act: let it be known by all in the audience that tonight's cast of characters is the property of QuinRose and William Shakespeare. Nothing is owned except this present storyline. Signed, the Playwright.

xoxox

[Scene opens with several of the characters in black, staring at a cross in the ground and a coffin—Polonius' funeral. The "priest", a Faceless, is murmuring condolences to Ophelia while everyone begins to slowly leave the stage.]

Claudius: [comes up to Ophelia] I am sorry about your loss. I wish your brother were here to comfort you.

Ophelia: Thank you, your Majesty. We've sent word to Laertes; he should be home soon enough.

C: Again, I'm terribly sorry. But the culprit will be caught and tried soon enough. Justice will be served.

O: Thank you, your Majesty, for your kind words.

C: [pats Ophelia on shoulder, leaves. Gertrude comes, offers condolences. Leaves.]

Horatio: [passing by with Marcellus (Pierce)] But where is Prince Hamlet? I would have expected him to attend the funeral. He didn't even show at the wake.

[Stage finally clears out except for Horatio, Ophelia, and Marcellus]

Marcellus: You didn't hear?

Ho: Hear what?

M: [stage whisper] Prince Hamlet was the one who, you know, to Polonius.

O: [gasps, covers mouth]

Ho: My lord. Where is he now?

M: Being held in the castle dungeons. The king is still debating his punishment. I think he's waiting until Laertes is back from France.

Ho: But why would he do this?

M: [shrugs] He thinks…[M motions closer, O leans into conversation as well] He thinks the king killed his brother to gain the throne. Crazy, right? I think Hamlet lost it when Daddy died.

[No one else is laughing]

Ho: There must be a reason. I will speak to Hamlet as soon as I can.

[Horatio, Marcellus, clear stage, leaving Ophelia alone, stricken with grief and disbelief]

[Scene ends]

xoxox

[Scene opens, Horatio and Hamlet, each on the other side of a set of bars. The dungeons.]

Horatio: But why did you do this? Hamlet, are you crazy like they say you are?

Hamlet: I am as sane as you, Horatio.

Ho: But Polonius? The man was harmless, a loyal fool to the crown! And Ophelia's father! how could you?

Ha: I have explained it. It was an accident, and I would take it back if I could. But what is done is done, and I have to receive my punishment.

Ho: Your uncle will have you executed. Royalty or no, the penalty for murder is death.

Ha: I realize that. But because I am royalty, I may get a trial, or something of the kind. I will be allowed to defend myself. My plans depend on it.

Ho: [scoffs] You have a plan? You actually expect something fair?

Ha: No. I expect my uncle to take full advantage of the last barrier to retaining his throne.

Ho: [cautious] What do you mean by that?

Ha: Your dear king murdered my father to gain his throne. That ghost from so long ago was my father and he told me. I am going to avenge him for Claudius' crime.

Ho: [somewhat speechless] The last king was murdered?

Ha: Yes.

Ho: If that is true, you are as good as dead.

Ha: Yes, I know, thank you Captain Obvious.

Ho: Don't be sarcastic, this is serious. What are you going to do now that you're in here?

Ha: I don't know. But you can get me information, correct?

Ho: [nods] I can. Marcellus and I are friends, after all. He'll let me through.

Ha: Good. Go. You should not linger here too long or you'll be suspected of working with me.

Ho: [grin] Even if I am?

Ha: [grins back] Of course. Now, go.

[Scene ends]

The spotlight came to Peter in his far right corner of the stage.

Peter: Things were getting difficult and more confusing around the royal family. So much death in the palace in so little time—the castle inhabitants were scared, confused, and unsure of where they should stand. Rumor of Hamlet's madness and actions spread; he was a beloved Prince, and many had a hard time imagining where such a good man had gone so wrong. And they weren't the only ones concerned. But who was most hurt and lost of all was Ophelia, Hamlet's love and the daughter of the man he'd murdered.

Spotlight lowers, curtain draws back.

[Scene opens to Ophelia, standing in an outdoors scene, with a silver cloth as a lake. She looks exhausted and extremely troubled; the makeup around her eyes are red, like she's been crying a lot.]

Ophelia: I'm sick and tired of being so confused. My love was taken from me by my father, and then that same father dies at the hands of my love. I cannot do this anymore, I cannot live in such a confusing, eat-or-be-eaten place. Goodbye, cruel world.

Peter: As she was about to jump, suddenly—

Laertes: Ophelia, no!

O: What? What are you doing here, A—Laertes? Aren't you in France?

L: I flew in. The funeral, remember? What are you doing?

O: [Alice hesitates a moment before improvising] Going for a swim.

L: It's twenty degrees out here. You'll die. [It didn't help that Ace was grinning widely as he said this.]

O: [scoffs] No I won't. [Quickly] Please leave now.

[Elliot, Twins and Boris run up.]: OPHELIA, DON'T DO IT!

The crowd of faceless began to shift uncomfortably, and Alice's eyebrow was doing the cha-cha on her face.

O: Hey, guys, get out of here. NOW.

Elliot: Ophelia, listen to sense. Don't jump, it's going to be okay.

O: Listen, if you guys don't get out right now I am going to jump right here and nothing will stop me.

Twins: But if we leave, you'll jump anyway.

O: THAT'S NOT THE POINT!

Suddenly all four Role Holders on stage jumped her and dragged Alice behind the curtain, muffling her shouts of protest. The curtain snapped closed and the audience murmured in confusion as five full minutes passed. Just as suddenly though the curtain snapped open again and Alice was alone on stage, her fists clenched but her head held high.

O: Due to new knowledge and circumstances, I've decided to hold off on killing myself until another time. That is all.

xoxox

The scene closed, and the faceless that knew how the play was supposed to go looked around, very lost at this point, and wondering if the price of admission was worth it.

Thinking about it, it was. It was either pay the exorbitant fee or lose a finger. Or an arm, whichever the sadistic prison warden felt like. Speaking of whom, where was the maniacal ringmaster now?

The lights came back up, and the spotlight shone on the right end of the stage, where Peter stood, sheet of paper in hand, and cleared his throat.

Peter: So we now cut past a few things and leap forward a week into the future…now present. [clears throat] Anyhow. So Laertes and Claudius are meeting to discuss their plans on how to deal with Hamlet.

[Laertes and Claudius enter the stage; take their seats at a small table prop]

Claudius: So I think we're both in a mutual predicament here. My nephew knows how his father died, and this same nephew off'd your father. My condolences, by the way.

Laertes: Thanks. Old man was kind of an idiot though.

[Offstage] Polonius: Hey! I heard that! That's two hours in the Box, young man!

L: [wails] Not the Box!

C: [looks around confused] Who are you talking to?

L: Umm…[clears throat] Anyway, how do you plan on killing Hamlet?

C: I was hoping you'd have some ideas. Usurping a kingdom has somewhat drained my creative abilities, so I'm dead out of evil plans.

L: Well, we could also just set up a duel and call it a night. The one left standing is obviously the winner.

C: A fair match, then, to decide the fate of the kingdom?

L: Who said it had to be fair? Though it doesn't really matter, because I'm going to win. Hamlet's a pansy.

C: Well, in case you don't win and Hamlet surprises us…[chilling laugh]…why don't we up the stakes?

L: What do you mean?

C: Subterfuge, my good man.

L: What does this have to do with underwater exploration?

C: [Deadpan]…You are your father's son.

[Offstage] P: I heard that!

C: Oh shut up, Polonius, you're dead. Go enjoy your Elysium Fields already. Lord knows I'm not getting in.

[Offstage, indignantly] P: It's a very nice country club, thank you very much! They have the most heavenly carrot cake!

C: I hope you choke on it.

L: [looks around, confused smile] Who are you talking to?

C: Never mind. I'm saying we sabotage the fight. We'll line your blade with poison, so that if Hamlet just gets cut, he'll still die, no matter if you win the fight or not.

L: That's pretty cold, sir. [Pause] I like it. [Cue typical Ace smile]

[scene ends]

xoxox

[Curtain remains shut, Peter steps out in his usual position. Noises can be heard behind the curtain.]

Peter: Hamlet agrees to the duel, not knowing Claudius' and Laertes' evil plot. So now, ladies and gentlemen, we come to the end of our show. It's been real, it's been fun. It's been real fun. Narrator out. [Spotlight clicks off, Peter leaves the stage]

[Curtain opens to Alice and Role Holders, minus Gray and 'dead', plus one or two faceless. Faceless are holding props, and group splits to stand evenly on either side of the stage, except for Ace and Julius, who stand opposite each other in the center.]

Laertes: Well, Hamlet, time for you to face your fate.

Hamlet: [Shrugs] After I'm done with you, I'll take care of my uncle, and that will be the end of things. Bring it on, Laertes.

L: My sword, if you would.

Faceless: Here you go. Exactly as you wanted. [Holds out prop sword]

L: [Holds the sword, swings it a couple times, frowns] How the hell am I supposed to kill him with this flimsy piece of prop? [drops prop] Give me a real sword, will ya?

Ophelia: Laertes, just use what the man gave you!

L: Oh, Ophelia! Are you glad you're alive right now?

Ophelia: [death glare] After this is over, I am never talking to you again.

L: How sweet, you're still cheering for your brother over your boyfriend!

O: [groans] I'm never talking to either of you ever again.

C: [clears throat] If we're done with the improv, can we get on with the fight? I'm really bored here. The sooner this wraps up, the sooner I can get back to ruling my kingdom and drinking some tea.

Gertrude: So are we. We want to see some blood already!

[Everyone looks over at Vivaldi, who merely shrugs and mutters, 'What?']

[Suddenly Peter pops out from the stage, holding various sharp implements, and hands one to each of the remaining Role Holders except Vivaldi and Alice, whom he grabs and pulls to the side, out of harm's way. Other prop-holders leave the stage]

O: Peter, what the hell—?

Peter: [stage whisper] Quiet, lovely Alice—um, Ophelia. [Raises voice to normal] Um, everyone, if I can have your attention. [All turn to Peter] We've decided to make this finale an all-out brawl. The last one standing wins. Just for the occasion, if the Ghost, Rosencrantz, Guildenstern and Polonius, and anyone else who I probably forgot, would come up to the stage and retrieve your weapons. Your Majesty, if you could get down from there, that'd be great. I'll protect Al—er, Ophelia. Have fun, boys. [Bright smile] If you actually kill each other, I really won't mind.

[Screams of "Peter!" and "White!" fill the air. Peter shrinks back.]

Ros & Guil: [As they come back] Those were not part of your lines, stalker rabbit!

C: Well, since we're here already… [Gladly takes sword]

R&G: Yay! We're back! [Picks up weapons] Bring it, you old geezers!

Ghost: [Yawns] Wake me up when it's over. I'll be hanging out in Purgatory.

Ha: [tugs on jacket collar] Just do it.

The crowd was muttering in utter confusion, and a few had their faces covered, knowing that this couldn't end well. A select few in the back were vibrating in their seats, trying not to laugh. Then again, these were the ones with no sense of self-preservation whatsoever.

"Please be quiet while the play is going on," came a sinister, calm voice from behind these poor unfortunates, who immediately froze in their seats and stared straight ahead, no longer laughing.

Everyone on stage was positioned, miniature one-on-one set-ups already in place and at the center a wide open space for Julius and Ace to square off.

L: Since this is still a duel between us, let's be formal about it.

Ha: [stares, confused]

L: [holds up sword, goes into stance] Hello. My name is Laertes. You killed my father. Prepare to die.

Ha: [Holds up sword in mirrored stance] Fine. I killed your father. Mine was murdered as well. So I can fully understand your anger.

L: Enough talking.

Peter called from the side of the stage, firm grip on Alice (and fully enjoying it), "Ready, everyone? Good. You may begin at the sound of the bell."

A boxing bell sounded off and multiple resounding clangs filled the stage as every Role Holder commenced their fight. They all fought rather theatrically, but still making sure to let Julius and Ace's fight remain the focus. Alice and Peter watched from the sidelines and Alice cringed at each close call. Members of the audience reacted with loud "oh!"s and "ooh!"s at every daring stab, swipe and dodge. A few yelled things like, "Go for the jugular!" and the like.

"They aren't really trying to hurt each other, are they?" she asked Peter worriedly.

"Not really. We thought about it but then decided that since you wouldn't like it, we would avoid real fights. But I'll be here if anything gets out of hand, okay? So don't worry. Everything is under control."

Alice looked up at Peter, and he smiled reassuringly to her before turning his attention back to the fights.

The other fights had ended one by one and the actors left the stage, leaving Julius and Ace in center, at a standstill, pushing against each other. In a sudden move Julius twisted Ace's sword out of the way and slashed the air in front of him—so close that it actually cut the fabric of the costume. The crowd and Alice gasped, and Ace fell down, sprawled out. He was "dead".

Boris stepped out and took Julius' hand, holding it in the air.

Horatio: Ladies and gentlemen, we have our victor! Hamlet has won the duel!

C: [Appears again, suddenly] He may have won the duel, but this isn't over yet. [Holds up sword, evil grin]

Ha: Uncle. [Holds up sword. Horatio backs off]

[Sudden loud crash offstage. The cast onstage turn and look out. Out steps Gray, looking extremely annoyed.]

Fortinbras: Of all the ridiculous… [Sees staring cast] Oh hello there.

Ha & C: Who are you?

F: I'm Fortinbras. I'm from the neighboring kingdom, Norway? You've heard of us.

C: Get on with it. I'm currently trying to stop a coup.

F: Well, that's not really necessary. You see, my troops and I are actually here to take over your country. But considering the mess around here, I think my job's already pretty much done.

C: Not while I am king.

Ha: Well, then. [Stabs Claudius] That's that, then.

[Claudius falls to ground, dead]

F: [looks down at Claudius] I take it there were some family problems?

Ha: Some. [Motions to Claudius] All solved.

F: Glad to hear it. Now, I'm still planning on taking over the country. So we can do this the hard way or the easy way. Which would you prefer?

Ha: Which results in my death?

F: Definitely the hard way.

Ha: And the easy way would be?

F: You sign a little agreement—call it a treaty—that hands over the rights of rule to me.

Ha: [sheaths sword] Sounds simple enough.

F: [Whips out paper and pen] As it so happens, I already have a draft written up. So if you could initial here [points, Hamlet initials] and here [flips page, Ha signs] and here, here, and here…[more signatures] And that should wrap it all up.

Ha: That was a lot easier than I would have thought.

F: I am very thorough. Is there anything you want to do or see before I banish you from your—excuse me, my—kingdom?

Ha: Well…[looks around, spots Alice and Peter] Hey, White, could you kindly let go of Ophelia now?

Peter: [disgruntled] Do I have to?

O: Sorry, Peter. [Leaves, goes on stage] What is it, Hamlet?

Ha: Do you still love me? Despite everything that's happened?

O: …Yes.

Ha: Then will you leave with me? Will you endure me and build a new life with me?

O: [big smile] Yes. Of course I will. [They leave stage]

[Peter comes on stage, still looking rather sad now that Alice was gone.]

Peter: Well, that's the end everyone. The Norwegian Prince Fortinbras took over management of Denmark and the now-exiled Prince Hamlet and Ophelia went off, got married, had a couple dozen kids and lived relatively happily ever after.

[curtain closes]

xoxox

There was nervous moment of silence as Alice and the others waited, worried about the reception. But they need not to have. A second later there was a roar of applause, and as the curtain opened for their bows, they found themselves staring at a full standing ovation.

xoxox

Alice and the others stood outside, accepting handshakes and congratulations from the crowd, many of whom said they really enjoyed the final scene. It was so unexpected but satisfying, and they'd really enjoyed the production.

A faceless woman came up to Alice and said, "I really loved it. But I have to ask: why did you change Ophelia's suicide in the second act?"

Alice smile uncomfortably and said, "Actually, it was all just part of the play. The finale wouldn't have worked otherwise. I'm glad you enjoyed it though."

Satisfied the woman went off to her territory.

xoxox

Everyone was gathered, out of costume and back into their normal clothes, and they were going over the play at the after-party, which was located, obviously, at the Clock Tower. Everyone was enjoying the food-Blood sat with a cup of black tea, very pleased and speaking in pleasant tones with Vivaldi. Boris and the Twins were exchanging word play with Elliot, who was on his third slice of carrot cake, and Pierce was hiding behind Elliot, just out of claw's reach of Boris. Julius sat in silence, enjoying a cup of coffee (grade 85, thank you) while Gray and Nightmare talked some about work. Ace was eating and sat beside Alice, grinning as per usual, as was Peter, who was glaring at Ace for being beside his Alice, and Gowland was speaking with Joker-comparing ideas, as it seemed. Overall, it was a very pleasant atmosphere and Alice finally spoke up.

"You guys never had any intentions of going through the scripted second act, did you?"

"Nope," came the unanimous response.

"But you are going to keep your end of the deal, aren't you? Because I kept 'living'?"

There was a momentary silence and Alice groaned. "Come on, you guys. Really?"

"Fine, Alice."

"Yes, onee-san, we promise."

Alice smiled. Finally! A full week of peace and quiet! Hallelujah!

...

...

Wait…

"That means absolutely no sabotage. What. So. Ever. I am to get my full week of quiet and solitude to do with what I wish. No stalking—" pointed look at Peter, "no impromptu camping trips—" dirty look at Ace, "no surprise visits and dragging to around amusement parks, nothing."

"Tea parties?" Blood said smoothly, smile on his face.

"What part of 'nothing' do you not understand?"

"Oh, little Alice, you know me. I don't understand when 'no' applies to me, do I?"

Alice sighed but a small smile came to her lips anyway.

"I…" she hesitated, and everyone looked expectantly at her, waiting for what she was going to say.

"I'm…really grateful. This was a lot of fun, and I really think we did a good job tonight. So, thank you. All of you."

"Even me?" Peter said in a small voice.

Alice did something very unexpected then: she leaned on and placed a small peck on the top of the white rabbit's head. "Yes, Peter, even you."

The Prime Minister blushed but said nothing, content.

"That was really fun," Ace said, smiling, as always, but this time it seemed genuine. "So, Alice, when's our next production?"


Well, that's it, everyone. Thanks for sticking it out until the end. The support has been amazing, I enjoyed you all's input and hope you'll stick around for another story at another time!