This contains graphic content such as: Self harm, nightmares, and self hate. If you do not want to read anything containing this content, please do not read, as I do not want to offend anyone.


"Okay, Ed, it's time to take your pill," Hughes said, holding out the tiny blue pill to the teenager. He knew he shouldn't have expected the kid to lunge at it, but he could show a little more enthusiasm.

"I'm not taking that thing," Edward said stubbornly. The parent sighed; he knew this was going to be a problem. He turned to Alphonse for a bit of help.

"Brother, please, if you don't take it, you might want to hurt yourself again…" the armor trailed off, unknowing of what to say to his elder brother. Edward continued with his stubborn streak.

"I told you guys I wasn't gonna do it again, and I won't. You just gotta leave me alone to do this on my own." The teenager leaned back in the sofa, turning his head away from the pill.

"But wouldn't it be so much easier if you had us here to help you?" Hughes asked. "You can lean on us for help, Ed. It's not a weakness," he reasoned. Apparently, Edward did not see it this way.

"No offense, guys, but I don't want your help," the blonde said, standing from the sofa and storming up the stairs to his bedroom. If the door was still attached he'd slam it, but it wasn't, so all the others heard was the creak of the bed denting in from the weight of the young alchemist.

Hughes sighed. "Guess he's not taking this then." The father threw the pill back into the container full of a one week supply, screwing the cap back on it.

"I'll try to talk him into taking it," Alphonse said. He stood from the sofa before the parent could get a word out, walking up the stairs. He also would have preferred the privacy of the door in this moment. He didn't want anyone to hear what he had to say.

"Brother." This seemed to get Edward's attention. He rolled onto his back on the bed so he could see his younger brother.

"What is it, Al?" Ed asked in a gentle tone. The last thing he wanted to do was upset the youngest Elric. Alphonse had what he wanted to say prepared since the night before.

"I found your razors in your compartment in the suitcase." Al held a hand up just before Edward could interject. "I'm not going to burn them like the colonel did to your other blades, but…" he trailed off. It was much easier planning what he was going to say before large golden eyes were looking up at him like a lost kitten. "I want you to stop using them. Please."

Deciding this conversation was best not done on his back, Edward sat up in bed, throwing his legs over the side so he could sit up completely. He sighed. Alphonse had found his stash. The stash he had been able to keep away from prying eyes for years had been found by his baby brother. It was something the teenager never wanted to expose Al to. Yet it had happened. And now he had to take care of it.

"Look, I said I was going to stop, and I will." It was now Edward's turn to pause. Though, unlike Alphonse, he hadn't been up all night preparing what he would be saying. He hadn't even had the thought that Alphonse would find his items. "I'll get rid of them myself, okay? Just…Just let me hold onto them a little longer," Ed pleaded.

Alphonse sighed, wondering what the others would say if they knew. He hadn't shown Hughes nor Roy of his discoveries. He had planned to keep it a secret between brothers. The two men didn't need to know of these items until it became completely necessary. Al could handle it all on his own.

"Alright, brother," Alphonse allowed. "But on one condition."

"Anything," Edward shot up immediately. He didn't want to lose these blades too.

"They stay with me and when you feel the need to use them, you'll come to me and we'll talk about it?" The way Al stated it, the condition almost sounded like a question. He wasn't quite sure Ed would go along with it, but when his brother was furiously nodding in front of him, he was shocked. Edward never listened to what he had to say – his big brother was always the boss. Alphonse let out a relieved sigh. "Thank you, brother."

"Al?" Ed asked quietly. It was unnatural how quiet the teenager was, yet Alphonse assumed it was his brother trying to keep quiet around everyone else.

"Yes, brother?"

"Will you get me my pill?"

There would have been a smile if possible.

"Of course, brother."


"How'd you do it?" Hughes asked as he gazed down at the sleeping blonde. The pill had caused Edward to fall asleep soon after taking it, as the doctor said it would do during dose for the first week.

"I just...talked to him," Alphonse said, his armor clanking as he shrugged. "We talked and then he asked me for his pill." There was no way the younger brother would betray his brother by telling anyone what they had been talking about.

"Well, whatever you did was genius," Hughes said before walking out of the room, leaving the brothers alone.

Alphonse could have smiled in that moment. This was how it should be. A brother being able to take care of his brother, knowing him more than anyone else. If mom was here…Al refused to let himself think of that. If their mother was there or even their father, Ed wouldn't have bothered to do this to himself in the first place.

"That's it," Alphonse whispered to himself so not to wake Edward. He made sure his brother was tucked in carefully under the blanket before walking downstairs. "Gracia?" he asked when he saw her in the living room doing Elysia's hair in ribbons.

"Yes, Alphonse?" Gracia responded quickly, yet not interrupting what she was doing. The skills a mother could possess.

"May I make a phone-call with your phone?" he asked. She smiled softly and nodded.

"Of course you can, Al," she said.

"Thank you." Alphonse quickly made his way to the phone, dialing a number he remembered Pinako reciting before waiting for the ringing to end. Finally, there was a voice on the other end of the line.

"Hello?" the voice asked. It was gruff, yet familiar to the armored teenager.

"Is this Van Hohenheim?" Al asked. His voice held an unsure squeak in its tone.

"Who is this?" the voice asked in alertness. Now Alphonse knew that this was who he wanted to speak to.

"Alphonse Elric," he answered quickly. Al had hoped that if he did this as quickly as possible, they could get to the reason of his calling.

"Alphonse? How did you get this number?" Hohenheim asked.

"Granny Pinako gave it to me. She said if I ever had a problem I could call this number." This wasn't entirely true. Ed had gone digging around in Pinako's home when they were kids and found the number. Pinako had said if anything happened to their mother they could call the number, though no one had answered when they called right after their mother had died.

"Do you have a problem?" Hohenheim asked seriously. "Are you in trouble?"

"Well…brother and I do have a problem…" Al paused, unsure of what to say next. Unlike when he had spoken to Edward, he hadn't planned out this speech. This was a spur of the moment decision. He also wasn't sure whether or not to tell their father or not.

"Where are you? I'll come to you as soon as I can," Hohenheim said instantly.

"We're staying at a friend's house in Central," Alphonse answered. He quickly gave the address before hanging up the phone.

Al just hoped he had done the right thing by contacting their father.


"Ugh, what time is it?" Edward groaned as he forced himself to sit up in bed. It was obviously dark outside, as there was no light shining through the window, and he felt sore all over. The marks his automail left on his body suggested that the teen had slept in an odd position during the day, not moving.

"Midnight," Alphonse answered from where he sat beside the bed his brother resided in. "I didn't expect those pills to make you so sleepy."

"Yeah, they knocked me right out," Ed said with a yawn. He groaned a little, raising his arms to stretch.

"Mister Hughes said when you woke up it would be okay to take the bandages off of your arm," Al said, standing as quietly as he could and walking toward his brother. "Is it alright if I do it?" he asked.

"Uh…" Edward trailed off. He wasn't sure he wanted his brother seeing the scars and cuts once again. He really wasn't sure he was ready for the bandages to come off. They had restricted him from access from seeing the marks; not allowing him the feeling of panic as his cuts faded away.

"Can we wait until morning, Al?" Ed asked. He didn't want to make his brother upset. "If they need to be treated or something, I'd like a fully awake Hughes there if you don't mind," he covered.

"Sure thing, brother. You should probably try to get back to sleep," Alphonse said. He pulled the blanket out from under his older brother, tucking him into the bed gently.

"I'm not four, you don't need to tuck me in or anything," Ed said, though they both knew that he enjoyed the gesture. It wasn't too long that Edward had fallen asleep once again, and Al assumed the medication was still in his system and continuing to make him tired.

"Goodnight, brother."


Next Update: 10.25.14