Families and other Freaks

I'm so sorry I haven't updated for a while but i'm really getting bogged down with A - Levels but this chapter is again a little longer so I hope it makes up for it. Also, thankyou for all the reviews, please keep it up!

Chapter 11 – Of All The Crazy Towns

Lorelai was standing frozen in the doorway, unable to process the information she had just received. Her baby girl was engaged! To JESS! What was she thinking! He's been back in her life for less than five minutes and he's already got her on drugs! For to Lorelai that was the only explanation as to why her daughter had agreed to go along with this madness.

"You're breakfasts ready." She repeated simply. Her daughter was staring at her with a look of pure fear on her face. It was a look her daughter had never given her. Luke had once or twice, even the occasional stranger in the street but never Rory. But oh boy, did she have a reason for it this time. But no, Lorelai was going to act calmly about this, even if it did go completely against her nature.

"Erm, Rory before I flip out and start screaming and yelling, and possibly even pass out, could you please explain to me what exactly it was that I heard in case I'm somehow mistaken and cause a whole ugly scene for nothing?" Rory took a deep breath and stood up to face her mother.

"Mom," she started calmly, "what you heard is true, I'm engaged to Jess." Suddenly calmness was lost on Lorelai.

"WHAT THE HELL FOR! YOU'VE BEEN BACK TOGETHER FOR TWO WEEKS! OH, MY GO ARE YOU PREGNANT! IS THAT WHAT YOU WERE TALKING ABOUT! I KNEW HE'D DO SOMETHING LIKE THIS! HE CAN'T GO ANYWHERE WITHOUT CAUSING HAVOC! I KNEW IT! I KNEW! FROM THE MOMENT LUKE SAID HE WAS COMING, I KNEW HE WOULD DO THIS! TAYLOR'S RIGHT, HE'S A WALKING NATURAL DISASTER!" She continued like this for several minutes, not letting Rory get a word in. Then finally –

"MOM! WOULD YOU SHUT UP A FOR A MINUTE! I'm not pregnant, though Lane here might be which is what she wanted to talk to me about. And no matter what you want to believe or what you think of Jess, I love him and I've never been surer of anything in my entire life!" Lorelai stared at her for a few moments and then turned around and ran back down to the diner. "Mom? What are you doing? Mom?" She followed her down to the diner where she found her fiancée scared for his life. Lorelai was behind the counter throwing donuts at Jess from across the room.

"Lorelai-" he said, ducking as she threw them at him. "Lorelai, what the hell is wrong with you?!"

"You're ruining my daughter's life!"

"How could I possibly be doing that?!" asked Jess, now truly terrified.

"Mom, would you leave him alone?" she said as she moved between them. But Lorelai ignored her and continued to stare at Jess.

"You've convinced her to marry you!" She paused to let the shocked gasps of the townsfolk fill the room. Jess noticed Babette take out her phone, undoubtedly to call Miss Patty. "After just two weeks. And then she'll get pregnant and she won't be able to get the career she's always dreamed about, then you'll break her heart again and then I'll be left to pick up the pieces!" The anger in Jess was now beginning to rise.

"You are crazy! It's going to be nothing like that! Oh, and FYI, your daughter proposed to me!" Jess' last words had Lorelai truly gob smacked. She turned to look at her daughter for verification, when she nodded she started again!

"ARE YOU CRAZY! HAS THIS BOY GOT YOU ON DRUGS! PLEASE TELL ME THAT IS IT BECAUSE THERE ARE LOTS OF PROGRAMMES THAT CAN HELP FIX IT!" That's when Luke decided to step in.

"Okay, that's enough. The four of us are going back to the house to discuss this n private. April could you please stay here and help Lane and Caesar after you've finished your breakfast?"

"Sure, Dad."

"Good. And everyone else, get back to your breakfasts and mind your own business!" And with that the four of them left the diner and headed back to the house.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Later at the Crapshack-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Once they had gotten back into the house and sat down in the living room, an awkward silence descended upon the room. After five minutes of staring at the floor, Luke, surprisingly, decided to break it.

"Okay, seen as how I'm still not completely sure of what happened back there, do you think you could fill me in? You know just in case I'm called to testify if my wife flips out again!" Rory decided to explain.

"Mom got a little upset when she found out that Jess and I have decided to get married." Jess groaned behind her and put his head in his hands unable to witness his uncles' reaction. Luke raised his eyebrows in surprise but ultimately tried to stay calm.

"Married? Wow! When did you guys decide this?"

"A couple of days ago." At these words Lorelai made a noise behind Luke.

"Even less than two weeks to decide! How wonderful!"

"Mom would you just listen to me?"

"Listen to what? How you plan to throw your life away? I thought we were passed this Rory?"

"Past what?"

"Past this self destructive stage you were so fond of in college. I thought we were back to the old Rory, the Rory that planned carefully before doing anything not the girl who makes completely irrational decisions!" At these words Rory stood up and looked down at her mother.

"YOU want to talk to ME about irrationality?! The woman who just pelted my fiancée with donuts?!" Lorelai stood up to face her.

"I had a right to be upset! You don't just decide to get married after five minutes together Rory! Have you learned nothing from 'Friends' and Britney Spears?" Before Rory could retaliate, Luke intervened again.

"Okay, lets all just calm down again. Now, Rory though your mother is acting a little irrationally," he then held up his hand to his wife who was about to interrupt, "she does raise quite a valid point. Two weeks is rather a short period to make such an important decision, do you think you could explain the thought process to us a little more?" Rory nodded.

"Look, Jess and I are completely aware as to how this sounds but we have thought this through. We're not saying we want to get married next week or even next year but we know we want to spend the rest of our lives together, just like you two knew. Only we don't want to waste all the years you guys did getting there. Mom, you know me and Jess are perfect together. You saw it the first time we tried it and although it didn't end so well, if Jess and I had been who we are now back then, it would have. Jess and have both had are issues to work out which we have, and yes we know there is a lot more to work out before we do actually get married but we can do it – together! I know this is a lot for you to digest mom and I didn't mean for you to find out this way. I wanted you to really see how good we are together before I told you. But Lane was upset at us earlier and I let it slip and that's how it all started. Jess is my soul mate, mom. You'll see that eventually." It was then Lorelai started to cry.

"But you're my baby, you can't get married!" Rory sighed and moved around Luke to hug her mother.

"Oh, mom I know this was shocking for you but I'm not a baby anymore – you've even said you didn't think I was ever a little kid." Lorelai nodded and then sighed herself.

"Do you really like him?" Jess rolled his eyes and Rory laughed.

"Yeah, I really do."

"Okay, let's go into the kitchen and make some coffee." She got up and went into the kitchen and her daughter followed, leaving Luke and Jess alone. They turned to look at each other and Jess was knew what was coming.

"You take care of her or you'll have me to deal with!"

"Got it!"

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------6:45 pm on the way to the Gilmore Mansion-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Lorelai, Luke, Rory, Jess and April were all on there way to the Gilmore's to give them the 'good' news, though Rory doubted that they would take it as such. Jess and Rory were taking his car and Luke, Lorelai and April were taking the Jeep. Jess kept glancing sideways at Rory as he drove, and it was beginning to annoy her.

"What?"

"Nothing."

"Then why do you keep looking at me?"

"Because you're pretty?"

"Try again."

"Are we really going to tell your grandparents tonight?"

"Yep, that was the deal me and mom made, she wouldn't flip out again if we told my grandparents."

"That's because she's hoping your grandmother will save her the job of killing me!"

"That's not it. She just doesn't want a repeat of what happened when she got engaged to Max. The entire town now knows we're engaged, we can't risk them being told by someone else."

"Yeah, those freaks in that town of yours just can't keep to themselves!"

"There not freaks!" She said defensively and he gave a sceptical look. "There just unique!"

"Well, you'd certainly never find people like them anywhere else."

"Tonight will be fine!"

"Yeah, but if your grandmother brings up that $200 haircut you used to date or any member of his family, I swear to god I'm leaving!"

"She's not going do anything like that. She knows we're together, I've explained everything to her. She knows I love you. Trust me." But still, Jess could hear the doubt in her voice.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------7:30 pm during dinner -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Oh, by the way, I spoke to Shira Huntzburger again this morning." At these words Jess looked over and scowled at Rory.

"Stay put." she mouthed at him. They'd made it this far through dinner and they hadn't had a chance to tell them yet, and she knew she wouldn't have the courage to face it again. It was Lorelai who decided to keep the conversation going and to humour Emily.

"Boy you two sure are chummy these days, aren't you? But I really don't think Rory and her fiancée need to hear news on her ex-boyfriend!" she took a sip of wine and then froze realizing what she'd said. Rory, Jess, Luke and April were all staring at her but the elder Gilmores appeared not to have noticed. Richard just sat chewing his meat silently and Emily just continued talking.

"Oh, Lorelai it was for nothing like that. Actually it was for something that may concern you. Do you remember that house your father and I were looking at for you and Luke during your first engagement, the one just outside Stars Hollow?"

"With the stables and tennis courts? Vaguely, why?"

"Well, once she's finished with Mitchum and their divorce she'll need a house of her own, won't she. The house she and Mitchum lived in has been in his family for over a hundred years, even she wouldn't dream of taking that away from him. No matter how much he may deserve it. No, she wants something that's just hers with no memories. Something smaller and away from Hartford, so I suggested it. I checked and it's still on the market; apparently after our inquiry everyone else's credit didn't check out, well that certainly won't happen with Shira. You don't think you might like it in the future do you? I could help her find somewhere else, if you do."

"Err, no mom we're happy where we are, thank you. But smaller, mom? That place was the size of Rhode Island!"

"Compared to the Huntzburger mansion Rhode Island is small." And with that they went back to their meals, no damage appearing to have been done. Then Lorelai spoke again.

"Hey, mom, could you please pass me the salt?" All of a sudden Emily froze.

"What did you say?!" Lorelai looked at her strangely

"Please pass me the salt?"

"No, before, you called him, Rory's fiancé!" Everybody, including Richard had now stopped eating, and was looking between Emily and Lorelai.

"Boy that took some time to register! Are you sure you've been taking your vitamins?"

"I had a train of thought going, that's all! Now why did you call him Rory's fiancée?" Everyone then turned to look at Lorelai. Who in turn looked at her daughter, but she was unable to speak. At a loss for what to say, she, much like her daughter in recent times, decided to opt for the truth.

"Well mom that would be because Rory is going to marry him!" And that's when the yelling commenced.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------About an hour later outside the Gilmore mansion-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

All five of them stood outside the front door, each one with the exception of April feeling considerably smaller than they did when they went in. Well it was safe to say that the evening could have ended a lot better.

"Well, that could have gone worse!" stated Lorelai, always trying to be optimistic. Her daughter stared at her.

"How could that have possibly gone worse?!" Rory yelled. "Despite the fact that you blurted it out before I had a chance to ease them into it, Emily then conceded to put down every aspect of our choices in husbands; yelling so loud, their maid of the week refused to get out from under the kitchen table. And then! After dinner finally recommenced after all the madness, you get me roped into lunch with both Grandma and SHIRA HUNTZBURGER, tomorrow!"

"I'm sorry but the only thing I could think off to get everyone out safely. In Emily's eyes you agreeing to see the mother of you ex-well bred-boyfriend, no offence Jess, gives her hope of reconciliation, even if everyone else has completely moved passed that train wreck and knows there is more chance of a Sonny and Cher reconciliation. And it worked didn't it? We're all here, not one injured!"

"Just mentally scarred." Muttered Jess.

"Hey you knew what you were in for when you agreed to marry into this family!" exclaimed Lorelai at her nephew/ future son in law. God that sounded weird, she thought. "Everyone just stop blaming me! I made a tiny slip, you know how I get when I'm talking to my mother I can't be held responsible for what comes out of my mouth!"

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------The Next Day-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

After breakfast at the diner the next morning, Jess left Rory, agonising over the upcoming lunch, to spend some time with Jimmy since he would be leaving the next day. He wasn't quite sure if Jimmy had gotten wind of his engagement yet, but he was sure he would have plenty to say on the matter. Jess got to the inn about ten; he was barely through the door when Jimmy started to push him out of it.

"Jimmy, what the hell are you doing?" he asked as his father

"Saving you from hours of pain! Sasha and your mother got wind of a rumour going around that you and Rory ran away to Vegas to get married! So now the two of them plus about ten other women from town are in the dinning room waiting a barricade you with questions. I figured it would be better if the two of us talked first so we could we straighten this whole thing out! Now, are you married?" Jess starred at Jimmy blankly for a few seconds trying to register everything he'd just been told. Couldn't anyone mind their own business in this town? And if they had to gossip, couldn't they at least do it accurately?

"What? No, we're not married! How the hell would we have had the time to run away to Las Vegas?! This whole thing is just a big misunderstanding!"

"Okay, well then do you mind explaining how this whole thing started because I got to tell yah, I'm stumped!"

"Rory and I are not married –yet!"

"Yet?"

"We're engaged." Jimmy stared at him in disbelief.

"Engaged!?"

"Yes."

"After just two weeks?"

"Yes." Repeated Jess. Now getting annoyed.

"Boy, I have to say son, you definitely don't like to waste time do you?"

"We've already wasted enough, but still we're not talking next week or anything just in the future!"

"But how did you get her to say yes, after just two weeks?"

"I didn't. She proposed to me." Regretting saying it as soon as he saw the smirk rising on Jimmy's face.

"She proposed to you? Well at least we know who wears the pants in your relationship!"

"Hey, for a guy who has spent the past few days hiding from both his wife and ex-wife I really don't think you're in a position to comment. And besides this is the twenty first century, woman pop the question all the time, her mother did!"

"Fine, fine, whatever you say. But you can be the one to tell Liz and Sasha all this but lets leave that for a while and go for a walk. Give them all time to calm down or get bored and go home."

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Later at the Inn----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Rory was sat in her mother's Inn waiting for an agonising lunch to begin. She'd just gotten rid of half of the town busy-bodies, and now it was time to face the wrath of Emily Gilmore. She'd already got a pep-talk from Jess and her mother plus three bowls of coffee and had a fourth on the go; she was as ready as she was ever going to be. She took another sip of her coffee and then she saw her Grandmother walk in with Shira. Shira, Rory noted looked as stunning as ever. Oh, yeah, Rory thought, she's really broke up about her divorce. She waved over to her Grandmother.

"Rory," her grandmother greeted, "I'm sure you remember Shira."

"Yes, it's nice to see you again Mrs Huntzburger."

"And you Rory, but please call me Shira." She said as they sat down at the table. "I must say Emily; your daughter's Inn is very impressive. I especially love the stables. I wonder if I should ask her who she hired to maintain them, my current house doesn't have its own stables but if I do buy the one we looked at I'll need to have it looked after properly."

"Well of course you will." Agreed Emily. "You want the best care for all of your home but whatever you do don't use and agency. I know you and Mitchum have had a set staff for a number of years now so I don't know what you're used to but it's always best to interview staff yourself. I can't tell you how many useless maids they've sent me over the years-" And they were off. It was thirty minutes of them talking about the correct staff to hire, to decorating and the potential of changing the Stars Hollow boundaries, their lunch had even arrived but they still didn't stop.

"I must say it is a charming little town. I think I might like living here."

"The man you want to speak to is the mayor, Taylor Doose –"Rory faded out of the conversation and focused on her food, praying her fiancé would return soon. Fiancé, that word still made her smile. However she was soon brought out of her musings, by her grandmother.

"Do you think that would work Rory? RORY!" cried Emily.

"Oh, sorry, what?"

"Do you think that would work?"

"Err, would what work?"

"Asking Mr Dosse to consider changing the boundaries so the house we just looked at, so it becomes part of Stars Hollow? Shira thinks the town is just charming!" Rory finally remembered what they were talking about.

"Oh, yeah sure. If you donate enough to the Stars hollow Bridge fund Taylor will give you anything you want." As soon as she had gotten these words out Jess and Jimmy walked through the main door. "Err, could you both excuse me for a minute." She then got up and walked over to them. "Hey, were have you guys been? You left me to deal with the gossip queens of Stars Hollow AND your mother and – who and earth told them we'd eloped?!" Jess smirked and pulled her into her hug.

"I'm sorry; Jimmy here dragged me off as he thought they would eat me alive, but I knew you could handle them!"

"Oh, please!" she pouted causing Jess to smirk again.

"Oh, come on I'll make it up to you later!" he said, making Rory giggle.

"Dirty!" For some reason this seemed to make Jimmy uncomfortable so he decided to excuse himself.

"I'm just gonna see if Sasha's back yet." And with that he left and went upstairs.

"So how's the lunch with your grandmother and the ex's mom going?"

"Err, okay, they've mostly just talked about the house she's buying. Actually it's going quite well, not one mention of Logan."

"Well, good come and find me when you're done." He kissed her on the cheek but as he started to move away she wouldn't let him. "What wrong?"

"You can't leave!"

"Well, not if you don't let go of my arm I can't!"

"No, I mean I left the table to come and find you so it would be rude not to introduce you."

"You want me to meet the mother of your ex-boyfriend?"

"Just come on." They walked into the dining room and over to the table where the two socialites were sitting. "Hey, err Grandma, look who's here."

"Oh, hello Jess."

"Hello, Mrs Gilmore." He then turned to look at Shira who was staring at him intently.

"Oh," Rory finally realised she hadn't introduced them, "Shira this is my fiancé Jess."

"Fiancé? Really? Well it's very nice to meet you. He's certainly a handsome young man, isn't he?" Rory laughed.

"Yes, he is." Jess fidgeted awkwardly, a little embarrassed.

"Oh, I'm sorry for staring before, it's just you look so familiar to me, have I met you somewhere before?"

"I rather doubt th-" Before he could finish Jimmy entered the dining room looking for Jess.

"Err, Jess, Sasha and the kids aren't back yet do you wanna head out for lunch?"

"James?" a voice behind Jess said. Jimmy turned to look at Shira and the blood completely drained from his face.

"Shira?!"

( Please don't hate me! You'll soon see where it's going! I hope you enjoyed it and I promise to update as soon as I can!)