Author's Notes: Okay, I am STILL undecided about the paring…but I am leaning toward YukiHara. Cuz they are so cute together! And they match really, really well. Their hair, I mean…like seriously…the blue and the black look so good together…okay, you guys can just ignore me…XD Also, I am still going to respond to reviewers…cuz it's fun, and it makes me feel special ) but, I might not pick you out specifically…but I probably will answer/comment in a general way…and if you think I haven't responded before…well, you're wrong; I just can't respond to them all the time. XP Also, for the last chapter…I thought it was just necessary to have sort of an explanation chapter…although the title will have a greater significance later on…I might edit it though, there were some parts I wasn't happy with…

Okay, as an additional side note: school will be over in…a week. (I'M GONNA GO TO HIGH SCHOOL NEXT YEAR! YAY!!!) So, yes, finals have started. ) In fact, I'll be taking the regents…because (for some unknown and completely unjustified) reason, I took biology this year (supposedly cuz I'm smart, but it's really cuz the bio students are the stupid ones, and they throw a few really smart kids in to make you think it's for the smart kids…I have this whole theory…that I didn't even come up with) okay, so that basically means that updates will be slower. I know you are crying (or laughing on the inside, but there isn't too much of a difference in this case), but I will update, and will (hopefully) finish before camp. Okay, moving on…

To KirharaAkaya (because you're my first reviewer; you get special treatment lol): Wow…whatever you're going through right now, I feel for you. A lot of this is based on things I have experienced and felt first hand (although I have applied those to different things…kind of) and, yes; I do know you can overdose on cough medicine. This is completely irrelevant, but I have a friend who overdosed on cough drops…she ate three bags in an hour, and got high on them. Also, to the whole counseling thing…last year, I was sent down because the school thought I was cutting. ME. Forgive me for being stereotypical here, but you have to hear this: a ditzy, preppy, Abercrombie and designer wearing (supposedly) intelligent flirt…CUTTING! WHO WEARS SHORT SLEEVES AND SKIRTS IN THE MIDDLE OF APRIL! slowly kills the school and then you have kids that take out razor blades during class, and cut themselves. (And this really happened…and more than once, too). My school is very cliquey, and we don't act otherwise; but I'm friends with a lot of people who are in different cliques…and I'm going on and on, and I'm pretty sure you clicked on this to read whatever nonsense I decided to write, and not this whole thing. Oh, and just so you know: I'm going to be one of the 8th graders to graduate this year…I'm pretty excited (FREEDOM FROM MY CRAPPY TEACHERS!) but I am going to miss the 7th graders…okay, now I'm really going to go to the story…well disclaimer, then story…okay, I'll stop now…

Disclaimer: If I owned POT, this would be in the series, and not on Also, Sandileina's nicknames are unfortunately not a part of my imagination, they are a part of hers…and the title of this chapter is also a song title, by 30 Seconds to Mars…I heard their song on Z100, they're pretty good…

Just as a side note, I really kind of made fun of the Rikkai boys…sort of like a test stress relief thing…

Chapter 11: The Kill

"I still don't see why his parents won't send him to a rehab." Sanada looked questiongly at Yanagi, who (usually) had all the answers.

"They do not think it will help him, because in that environment, there are no drugs or alcohol to tempt him." Yanagi had spent three hours getting this information out of Akaya; and in the end he had had to agree not to tell any teachers. The rest of the team agreed not to, but for different reasons; reasons that they themselves didn't even know.

"I don't see the logic in that." Sanada and Yanagi looked worriedly over at Yukimura, who hadn't taken Akaya's problems…well. "Obviously, rehabs must work; otherwise they wouldn't have them…" His voice trailing off, Yukimura looked around the room. To him, it just didn't look the same with Akaya. It just wasn't…complete.

"So, I heard the brattling's back in school." Yukimura, Sanada, and Yanagi turned around to see Niou standing there with a bored look on his face.

"Really? It thought he wouldn't be back for a few more days…data…" Caught up in him mumbling, Yanagi started quickly filling up one of the new notebooks he'd bought for Akaya. Because they hadn't had morning practice, no one had seen him; and since it had only been about a week since the "Pill Incident" (as Niou named it), they hadn't thought he'd be back in school.

"That is really strange…I thought that, since his parents know about it, they would at least have him seek help, or keep him out of school for a while…" Frowning slightly, Yukimura gazed distractedly around the room. "Strange…"

"What's strange?" The topic of their conversation stood in the doorway, eyeing his sempais suspiciously.

"You." Niou paused a moment to give Akaya some time to react. When no reaction came, Niou decided it was time for "drastic measures". The fact that Akaya was an addict, an alcoholic, and a cutter (was there anything he hadn't tried, the Trickster wondered), and now he wasn't even responding to insults that would normally make him glare…yes, f there was ever a time for drastic measures, now was it.

Completely ignoring the fact that this was not going to help Akaya in anyway (and probably make him run enough laps to last him a lifetime); Niou turned and commented loudly to Sanada,"You know, I heard that people usually do drugs when they want attention. And it made me wonder…what if this whole thing is just a little scheme to get attention?"

Akaya turned around and glared at Niou. Niou was practically screaming this, and he didn't want the world to know…the school just might take action. Pleased that he had got a reaction, Niou turned around to Marui and Jackal, who had just walked in, and announced proudly, "I know why Akaya is an addict!"

While Jackal wondered about the accuracy of that statement, Marui said, "Really? What's the reason?"

"You see, Akaya doesn't really grave highs. He craves attention!" Now Yagyuu, who had just walked in, began to seriously wonder about Niou's (in)sanity. For one thing, Akaya had not wanted them to know he did drugs and alcohol, and for the next…nope. The first reason was enough.

"Haru…I really don't think Akaya is slowly killing himself for attention." Yagyuu silently thanked his poker face, because it granted him immunity from the looks he was now getting.

"Oh, come on…doing that doesn't kill you." While Marui rolled his eyes, it was now Jackal's turn to worry about he sanity (or stupidity) of his doubles partner.

"That's kind of the point." Akaya looked over at his sempai-tachi and rolled his eyes.

"Akaya you want to die?" Marui was just the type of cheerful person that people who were suicidal, or even just pessimistic, tried to avoid…and so his seriously lacking in that department.

Akaya, knowing there was really no point in answering, just shrugged.

"Akaya, I think you need to upfront and honest. After all, we just care about you…and you're not going to get any better unless you get help." Yukimura gazed anxiously at his kouhai…there was something in Akaya's eyes….something that had flashed in them when he had come clean about the drugs…and something that he didn't like.

"It's just…" his voice fading out, Akaya shrugged, but the look in his eyes got stronger. Sensing a breakthrough, all the regulars quieted, and gazing expectantly at Akaya, waited for him to begin.

Akaya shifting nervously, opened his mouth and burst out, "I just feel like…like I'm going to die eventually, and that there really isn't any pint in living. Like, everything is just getting worse and worse and worse…I know what I'm doing, and I'm not going to live past 40, but I'm doing it anyway…I hate everything and everyone. My parents have given up on me…hell, I've given up on me…there's just no point to anything, in anything…and the only things that make me feel better are the things that are slowly killing me." Taking a breath, Akaya laughed bitterly. "Everything is so stupid, and all those things that are supposed to be important…just aren't. it's so fucking pointless…and right now, it's just easier to die than to go through feeling like this…and I can't explain how I feel, it's too complicated…" voice fading out, Akaya registered, for the first time, he began his outburst, the shocked looks on his sempai-tachi's faces.

"I-I said too much." And before any more questions could be asked, Akaya turned and left the changing rooms, going to the tennis courts that the rest of the club, excluding the regulars, had left for 20 minutes ago.

Okay…so Akaya kind of broke down…hmm, I don't know if I'm pleased with this…tell me what you think. All you have to do is push that little button right there (you don't even have to sign on!) and I swear, I won't take anything personally…just please review…it'll make me update faster! I SWEAR!

LoveableDuck