Chapter 11: Sippy Cups and Nap Time
By: courthale
POV: Emmett
My hands shook as I turned the knob to start the shower. The hot water cascaded over my stiff muscles and I relaxed slightly at the pulsing of the massager. I put my palms flat on the shower wall and let the water envelop me. It pelted the top of my head and ran down my face. I gasped as I breathed in. I turned around to let the water hit my back. I tilted my head back and rinsed my hair, washing it quickly. I washed off the rest of my body and took my time. I was stalling, and I knew it.
Today was a big day for a few people. Today I would meet the two who had fundamentally altered my life in a matter of minutes the first time I saw them that night.
I would for the first time meet my sons as their father.
I felt a mixture of emotions rise inside me. Everything was changing. I was scared shitless, but also happier than I could ever remember being. My life had been just a coax through the world. Sort of being there and doing what had to be done, but with these two lives, I could really make an impact on the world.
They were my world.
This realization made me move quicker. I quickly rinsed off and grabbed a towel, wrapping it around my waist. I walked back into my room and put on some casual clothes for the day. I called into the office and old my VP that he would need to handle all the business and that I was taking a day off.
I pulled on my shirt and jeans to make myself look completely comfortable, but on the inside, I was dying of nervousness. I grabbed my wallet and phone. I looked at the screen and it noted that it was 8:30; Plenty of time to stop and get coffee and maybe have it as a peace offering.
I sat in my car in front of her house at five minutes til nine. I breathed in deep and counted to ten before letting it out in a rush. I did that one more time before I felt calm enough to get out of the car and walk to the front door. I knocked with one hand while the other held our two coffees and then two small hot chocolates for the boys in a drink carrier. I didn't know anything about them, but I figured it was the thought that counted.
The sound of feet coming toward me made my shoulders and back straighten and stiffen. I breathed in deep again as the door opened, showing a very tired looking Bella. She smiled kindly at me and opened the door wider. I looked over her and saw she was wearing some black sweat pants and a CBGB T-shirt.
"Good morning," I said, handing her the one coffee. She smiled wider at me.
"I think I just fell in love with you," She chuckled and took a long swig. Her eyes grew wide as she realized what she said. She shook her head at me and laughed awkwardly. I chuckled too and she looked at my hands. "Alice and Jasper aren't here," She said, but I stopped her.
"These are for the little guys," I said and followed her into the kitchen where they were both sitting in high chairs. They each had some banana slices and cheerios in small bowls. Aiden smiled at me and dropped the cheerios he had in his hand.
"Hi!" He said enthusiastically. He reminded me a lot of myself. I felt my heart swell with that fact.
"Hello," I said and sat the hot chocolates on the table.
"Mama," He smiled and held his arms out. She smiled and leaned down. He hugged her neck and she laughed. "Em!" He said and held out his arms to me. I walked over there and leaned down. His arms came around my neck and he squeezed tight. I breathed in and his scent filled my senses. He smelled of fresh rain and baby lotion. He kissed my cheek and then let me go, "Mornin' kisses," He smiled some more before going back to his food.
I stood straight and then walked over to the hot chocolates. I turned to Bella and she held up a finger. She walked over to the cabinets and got a few cups that had lids with a spout.
"Sippy cups," She smiled. I nodded and she took them from me.
She poured them both about half a cup full and then screwed the lids back on. I watched in awe of how right she looked in this element. She was a mother through and through. These boys were very lucky to have her with them through life. She handed them off their drinks and then sat down at the table.
"Have a seat. They won't take too long," She said and looked down at her coffee. I took mine from the carrier and sat across from her and the boys. She helped them both along as they ate.
I looked to her right and saw the quiet one, Evan, watching me. He seemed to be a little more cautious than his brother. He would whisper things to Bella instead of just speaking out loud like Aidan. I smiled at him and he blushed before looking down and shoving a piece of a banana into his mouth.
I was in a daze of watching them when my trance was broken.
"What's your name?" Evan asked in a quiet voice. Bella smiled encouragingly at me and then at him.
"I'm Emmett," I answered, unsure if it was the right time to say that I was his father. He nodded and took another drink from his sippy cup.
"Thank you, Emmett," He smiled at me. I gave him a smile back and his widened, showing his deep dimples. They really were so much like my side of the family.
They had the clearest blue eyes that struck me the first time I saw them. The blonde curls that topped there head were reminiscent of my mother's. Pictures of her as a young woman hung in my house. My father was also a blonde, so it was something that was an absolute for me. The oddest thing I noticed was the twinkle in their eyes; That was all Pops.
I pushed the sadness to the back of my mind that he would never meet them. What was saddest of all is that they would never meet him. I felt the familiar pain in my chest and breathed in deep, looking down at my hands.
"Time to go outside big boys," Bella said and stood up. She went and got a towel, wiping them each off of the excess food and drinks. "Good to go," She smiled and took off Evan's table first and then put him on the ground. He went to stand by the glass door that led to the back yard.
"Mama!" Aidan said and squirmed in his seat, trying to push the table back himself.
"I'm coming. I'm coming," She said and smiled at him. I love watching her with them. How could she ever think I could ever take them from her? She was a part of them just as much as they were a part of her.
"Yay!" He shouted and ran over to where his brother was still standing.
"I take them outside about this time everyday. Want to have your coffee out here with me?" She asked, standing by the door handle.
"Of course," I rose from my seat and made my way over to her.
She bent her knees slightly and looked them both in the eyes. They looked back at her with an intensity that made me chuckle.
"Rules?" She questioned and continued to look at them.
"No hitting," They both said at the same time.
"And?" She asked as she quirked an eyebrow at them.
"No eating grass or bugs," They said in harmony. I chuckled loudly at that and she smirked up at me.
"They are only boys," She said and opened the back door. "But Jasper ate a bug last week because Jake bet him 50 bucks he wouldn't. So, is it really only the boys?" She smiled, questioning her statement.
I shrugged my shoulders, "Guess not."
The laughter from the boys was loud and joyful as they ran to the play sets and toys in the backyard. I smiled again at the sound of just how innocent and perfect they sounded.
"Over here," Bella said and pointed to a table outside, close to the house and close enough to the little ones.
We sat in silence for a few minutes. I drank my coffee and watched the boys as Bella did the same. They played together quite well. They seemed to have an unbreakable bond between them and even an acute sense of the other. One would hold out his hand and the other would place what he needed in that hand. It was amazing to watch.
"They've always been like that. Even being so young they just know," She smiled at the sight of them playing in the sandbox.
Aidan was sitting in the corner with his legs spread, pushing the sand around. Evan was on the other side with shovels and other toys. Every once in a while Aiden would wordlessly hold out his hand and Evan, still playing with on his own side, would hand him the tool needed.
"It's fascinating," I breathed.
"Mmhm," She said and took another sip of her coffee.
"So," I said awkwardly.
"So?" She looked to me, but glanced over at them briefly.
"How are we going to do this?" I said and looked into her eyes. She sighed and put her coffee on the table. She turned her body to me and looked into my eyes also.
"I want to have faith in you. I want to be able to trust that you are here with good intentions, but for two, almost three years, I have been so afraid of losing them to you. No, I didn't know you. I had no clue what kind of person you were. So, my worst fears and insecurities were intensified. Add that to your status and I became terrified because you do have the power to take them from," She said and I cut in.
"But I'm not going to," I said and she nodded.
"You may know that, and I may want to believe that. But that doesn't suppress three years worth of fears," She sighed.
"I guess I can understand that. Sort of," I added. We were getting somewhere now, understanding one another more.
"It's an automatic response. I can't control how passionate I feel about my sons and the need to protect them." She paused and looked over at them on the swings now. Her smile was bright and beautiful. Her love for them was more than obvious. It was almost like this glow around her of warmth and comfort. She was their haven.
"It suits you," I said softly. She turned to me and had a curious look on her face.
"What?" She asked and titled her head to the side.
"Motherhood. It suits you. Like this is what you were born for," I said and gestured to the boys. She smiled genuinely for the first time.
"I think that's the best compliment I've ever gotten." Her eyes were glassy with emotions and she looked at me with thanks. I nodded and picked up my coffee.
"It's the truth." I smiled at her.
"They have your smile," She whispered.
I gulped down the swig I had just taken. "I know," I said just as quietly.
"Your eyes and hair and, just... everything." She said with a little chuckle.
"That a good thing?" I asked her light heartedly.
"I think it's good and bad," She said thoughtfully.
"How's that?" I asked and turned my body to look over at her. She smirked at me then looked out at the boys.
"They are cute boys," She paused and looked over to me. "And will make handsome young men." She said and made a gestured towards me. "Heartbreakers." She laughed. I laughed loudly with her at the point she was making.
"They have a hot dad. What can I say?" I said and smiled at her, making it a point to puff out my chest and hold my head up high. She giggled and looked over at the boys again, like she did every so often. She looked down at her watch and sighed.
"It's about one now," She said and I looked down at mine.
"Where did the time go?" I asked and scratched my head.
"You'll find out that, as a parent, time moves fast." She said wistfully, her eyes trained on Aidan and Evan. "It seems like only yesterday they were just small little things that couldn't do a thing for themselves."
"When do you…?" I asked, trailing off. She nodded and stood.
"I think I know what to say for them to understand what I'm saying. Just follow my lead, okay?" She said and looked up into my eyes as I joined her in standing. I nodded and took a deep breath.
"Let's do this," I smiled.
"Boys!" She shouted and walked over towards them. I followed suit behind her. My eyes trained on the two small bodies that charged toward us. She took both of their hands and walked us over to two big lounge chairs. She sat down and took them both into her lap, one sitting on each leg.
"Hey," Evan said, waving at me as I sat in the one opposite them.
"Hi," I smiled back and said it just as softly.
"You guys know how some of your friends have someone like me, a mommy?" She said and they both nodded, looking at her with rapt attention. "Well, they also have someone else too. Someone called a daddy." She told me. They both nodded.
"Like Mr. Mitch?" Evan asked, playing with a piece of her hair.
"Yeah, like Abby's daddy, Mitch," She said and kissed his forehead. "Well, like Mr. Mitch is Abby's dad, Emmett is yours." She said and they both looked up at her, confused.
"Daddy?" Evan asked and pointed at me.
"Yeah, little guy," I smiled. He blushed and buried his face into her shoulder.
It was Aidan who made his joy apparent at this news.
"DADDY!" His small body attacked mine with such a force that he knocked me back onto the lounge. His small arms wrapped around my neck and held on tight. I laughed loud and heartily. He giggled and turned his face into my neck. "Daddy," He whispered.
The next few hours we went about our day as normally as we could. I helped her fix them lunch and even ate with them. We had sandwiches and apple slices. I chuckled at how much of a kid I felt at the choice. It was nice to just relax though. No lunch meeting at a fancy restaurant today. No budget cuts having to be made that would affect thousands and thousands of employees.
While they napped, Bella and I discussed the financial aspect of it all.
"I want to be able to provide for them in any way I can. It's not me marking my territory on them. It's just my peace of mind needing to be sated that I gave them all I could." I explained to her.
"I just don't want you thinking this is all I want from you." She said, then looked at the figure I gave her. It was a lump sum for a bank account along with a number for the deposit into that account monthly. She shook her head at the number again. If only she knew that was even lower than what I wanted to give her.
"Trust me, I know." I said and placed a hand on hers. She sighed and nodded.
"Okay," She resigned.
"Great. I'll get you the debit card for the account and checks in your name." I told her, typing all of the info into my blackberry. "I'm also starting a college fund for them. And one of my lawyers will set up a will to ensure that all my assets go to them in the event of my death. Also, a trust fund will be set up…" I continued and she cut me off.
"Whoa, stop. Too much to process at once." She said, putting her fingertips to her temples and massaging them.
"How about I just send you the paperwork?" I questioned with an encouraging smile.
"Sounds good," she sighed. We heard sound from the monitor between us and she stood, "The boys are awake. I'll be right back."
"Can I help?" I asked in a small voice, afraid she would say no or that I was overstepping.
"Of course."
We walked side by side quietly to their room. The door was already open and we could see that Aidan was standing in his crib, rubbing the sleep from his eyes.
"Daddy," He said and held out his arms. I smiled at him and walked over to him. I picked him up and he laid his head on my shoulder. I saw Bella picking up Evan as he was awake also.
"How's my guy doing?" She whispered and kissed his cheek.
We both looked over at the other and smiled. I had found my place in this world.
Right here.
Right now.
My sons.
Forever.
A few more hours later it was about 6:30. Bella was working in the kitchen and I was laying on the couch with Aidan on my chest and Evan laying beside me. The couch was massive enough for it. We were watching some child's show on DVD. I think we all must have fallen asleep because the next thing I heard was whispers.
I kept my eyes closed and listened in.
"It's so cute," A feminine voice, I assumed was her friend Alice, said.
"It's kind of surreal," I heard Bella sigh.
"And even Aidan fell asleep in his arms. He only ever does that for you," She seemed to be barely containing her excitement.
"I know," She whispered. "I should put them in bed." I heard her footsteps get closer and soon I heard her soft voice close to me, "Emmett?"
"Hm?" I sighed contentedly. I held both of the little ones closer to me out of instinct.
"I need to put them in their cribs. And you should get home," She told me. I was filled with a slight sense of loss, thinking about leaving them. I knew it was irrational, but I think I would just miss them so much.
"Okay," I whispered and opened my eyes. She moved my arm and picked up Evan from beside me.
I put my arms around Aidan and stood up. His arms tightened around my neck, like he had been doing all day. He almost seemed scared I would disappear. My arms tightened around him enough to communicate with him that I was here.
We walked into the room, she laid Evan down as I did the same with Aiden.
"I'm glad I thought to give them a bath and got them ready for bed before the DVD," She smiled as we stood in the middle of their room. I watched the two faces of my sleeping sons.
Standing there with this woman, looking at our sons, hit me with the fact that this was real. We had made these two people.
They were ours. Ours to keep. Ours to hold. And ours to raise.
I was finally part of a family.
My family.
I belonged.
I was home.
Home wasn't about having a roof over your head or a mortgage. It was about where your heart was. In my life, that had always been with Pops. He was gone. I missed him so damn much. Since he was gone, my heart was gone too. But with this here and now, I had a new home.
And it was beautiful.
