DISCLAIMER: I don't own Naruto, the songs, or anything else, THANKYA MASASHI! FOR JUST BEING AWSOME!
Hyper
WARNING!!!!! READ ME! READ ME! READ ME IF YOU WANT ANY OF THIS TO MAKE SENSE! PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE!!!!!!!
WARNING!
READ ME!
HERE HERE LOOKIT MEH!
RIGHT HERE!
READ ME!
NOT A CHAINLETTER!
READ ME ME ME!
READ READ READ READ READ READ READ READ READ READ READ READ ME!
HI RIGHT HERE!
LOOK!
RIGHT HERE!
THIS THING RIGHT IN YOUR FACE!
YOU NEED TO READ
ME!
HI!
HEY! WOO-HOO! READ ME!
IMPORTANT!
IMPORTANT!
IMPORTANCE TO THE MAX!
READ THIS THING RIGHT HERE!!!
SEE? THIS THING!
RIGHT HERE AT THE BOTTOM!
RIGHT HERE DAMMIT!
THIS |/ \/ \/ \/ \/ \/
\/ \/ \/ \/ \/ \/ \/
\/ \/ \/ \/ \/
\/ \/ \/
\/ \/
\/
NAMES HAVE CHANGED!
Hebi is now Fuu. Taikun is now Yagura. Taifuu is now Utakata. And Yu is now Han..... Damn you Masashi Kishimoto,
----------------------------Chapter 10: Da' Coolest Monster
Tuesday, police go to Fuu's place and find out that alot of the kids were adopted from other orphanages so the owner could get more money from charity.
Wednesday, I'm called off school to testify, owner pleads guilty because of a bargain that he'll tell police where the childrens records are.
Thursday, I return to school and Yugito glomps me for helping save Fuu,
Today, Friday, everything's normal. And Roshi actually ended up adopting Fuu, I leave the RDC meeting calm, and normal, I also ponder if I get my name in the paper or not,
"NARATO!" Thunderous steps and children screaming signal Killer Bee running up to catch me. He runs infront of me and does the pointy-finger-Happy-Days pose, "Rap time!"
"What is it today Killer?"
"I don' know!" I stare at him for a few moments, makeing a mental note that everything is definitly back to as normal as normal can be. "That's why I'm here!"
"....Are you supposed to be makeing sense?"
"Not yet!" He does another un-comparable pose and I listen, "Alls I can start out wit' is, member' me rappin' tha personals of all mah otha homies?"
"....Ya mean when you were all like- 'Mah name es Knuckles, unlike Sonic I don' wanna chuckle, I'd rather flex mah muscles,' " Yes, Me and Kiba are mayjor Sonic fans, but please, don't ask if we cosplayed, slash took advantage of our Sims game,
"YEA!" He yelled, and I continued to listen, scared at the fact that he actually does seem to somehow make sense to me,
"What about it?"
"Well, I liketa make a rap bout' all mah homies, buh' I can't seem ta thinka one for ya!"
"Have you tried watching South Park?"
"Oh, ah love chef but dah' ain' workin'." He said smileing to himself, and I imagined him in the outfit....Heheh, Chocolate salty balls, heheh, "Anyway! I wasa wonderin' if maybe ya' could allow me ta' follow ya' around for a bit, ya' know, geta' knowya' bettah' " The thought of getting stalked by a rapping indian scared me a little, but I nodded my head not wanting to know what'd happen if I said no, Killer Bee seems to be one of the most normal outta the group, so not too much'll happen with him around.... right?
---------------------Ichiraku
"HELLA BRAH!" Killer greeted the for-once weirded out Jiraiya when we got home, I was already tired! HE FRIGGIN' KEPT ASKIN' ME WHY I TOOK A SECOND LOOK AT THE DOG ON THE WAY HOME AND WHY I WALKED THE WAY.... THAT....I...... WALKED!
".....Welcome, my good company, would you like a fruit cup?" Jiraiya greeted like a dignified gentlemen.....Ohmygawd,
"Dah man I would buh' I needstah' keep mah eyes an' senses on Naratoh," He said, Jiraiya replied with a smile followed by jumping backwards onto the counter and danceing like the retarded maniac he is. I love my extended family, but if my company's gonna think I'm weird I want it to be cause I was running repeatedly into the wall.... Because my dear mind-reading alien friends slash Han, insanity is where you do the same thing over and over and expect diffrent results.... Boo-yah, ba-be,
I then run into my own door because I'm retarded, and because I kinda want Killer to get freaked out and leave, but I forget that this guys apparently psychotic, and not effected by my anti-normalness,
----------------------Later
"So' Narahtoh? Why is yer room all orange likeyer hair?" He asked holding up a notepad sitting on my floor as I leaned agenst the wall on my bed, no longer careing about my mental health,
"This place was decorated by my insane godfather so apparently from what he said my moms favorite color was orange," I answered every damn question he through at me, why? cause I no longer have a life,
"Now who wuset thah' put tha' fool Jirai' as her goddaddy?"
"JIRAIYA! WHICH ONE OF MY PARENTS SAID YOU COULD BE THE GODDADDY!?" I yelled,
Jiraiya jumped into the room and did jazz hands, followed by his answer, " Your dear departed father told me during brunch that he loved my book 'Tales of a Gutsy Ninja' and that he wanted you raised to be just like the main character, then stateing that he would name his son, you darling sweetheart, after the character, your beautiful mother came in and agreed and I laughingly stated that that would make me the godfather, and your father replied with that it would be an honor for you too ever be raised, and it was probably my fault for leaveing town right after that that caused you to go to a orphanage when you parents found they couldn't spoil you as much as they wanted," He skipped backwards out and I turned back to Killer Bee,
"......What's yer fav' gem?"
"The light blue ones,"
---------------------------Later again
Two-thirty in the morning, and, I'm, going, crazy,
"Whas yer favorite sad rememberin' song?"
"....Yawwwn, Freeze by Jordin Sparks,"
"Favorite sad slasha happy song?"
"I dunno, Take my Hand by Simple Plan?"
"Why?"
"Cause-"
"I mean why Freeze?"
"....Well that's cause I imagine a buncha old pictures falling down and fadeing each time it goes 'Freeeeeeeeze, the moment"
"Now why Take mah' Han'?"
"Cause I secretly watch gay porn when no one's looking, can I call my friends now so the eight-year-olds don't get pissed at me again?"
"M'kay!"
I stumble out of the room after haveing been in the same position for over three hours, (The last time I picked my nose it was at least midnight) Killer obviously followed me, and since it was my first time being up this late here I was very surprised to see that Jiraiya had actually gone to bed. I picked up the phone, and I don't know how it was that I thought somebody would still be up this late.
I cursed under my breath and Killer Bee apparently took intrest in the exact word I used since he seemed to write it down, I dialed Sasuke's foster house number but it picked up before my mind registered hanging up,
"Yeessss? Anko the totally sweet n' sour princess of snakes and puppys here?" Cooed the voice of the 'darling' lunch lady, I smiled knowing she was crazy enough not to be pissed at me for calling so late,
"Hey, I had a messed up sch-med-ual, is Sasuke still up?"
"Probably! I was watching porn on the big screen and I heard his door open," The giddy footsteps showed she skipped over to her next destination, she then swore after realizeing that she had a corded phone and I heard her pick up the cordless (How many phones do they have in one room?) "Sasuke-Kuny! you on the pooper?" She cooed sadisticly,
I heard Sasuke's signature grunts and a door open "Hey,"
"Hi Sasuke!" I said with (almost) un-intended enthusiasum. I smacked my head as Killer wrote something else in the notepad that apparently ISN'T FULL YET, "....Hat'cha doin?" I said not sure if he was still emo,
"Othin' " Well, he sounds like he's in his bored 'Why the hell are you calling me at three in the morning?' mood voice that I hear so often,
"Ell'...... Why you up so late?" So very curious. Not that I don't remember the thousands of times we stayed up all night watching Nip Tuck re-runs and drinking a giant jug-o-coca-cola-o. Or the first time when it was unintentional and me and Sasuke were just innocently seeing how many times we could follow a trail of ice cubes from the kitchen to the living room on the rug of which was coated with salt for reasons I don't recall.... Okay, enough remembering I don't wanna sound too em-ZOMG I WANNA GO HOME!!!
".....Stuff," He sounded tired to all-get-out but not any more emo then usual...... Damn if only those bitchy hormonal witches had left poor Cole alone he wouldn't a had a break down and slept with Rosie O'Donnel! damn, that show was annoying..... I'm off track again huh?
Anyway, I can't think of a thing to say and Killer Bee's I think's starting to take it the wrong way, I sneak my hand up (Not that he can't obviously see what I'm doing) and press speaker phone, "So, uh, anyway, nice haveing this fruitful conversation with you my man,"
"...Is someone else there?" Sasuke asks. Killer Bee now seems to be writeing his opinion on Sasuke's voice down,
"Yea, there's a indian rapper guy stalking me and all that normal crap," I say, stareing at the expression of dumb-founded wonder on Killer's face,
"....Okay then," He yawns and hangs up on me, I pout like someone's watching but remember that Killer Bee is right next to me of course, I dial Iruka's number completely forgetting about speaker phone like the idiot I am,
"HIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINARUTOITHOUGHTYOUHADFORGOTTENTOCALLMEAGAINBUTYOUDIDNTYAYHINARUTOHIHOWYADOIN!?!?!?!?!?!?!?" Konohamaru yelled before the phone even had the chance to ring,
Then, Jiraiya bursts through his door screaming, Me and Killer discovor he sleeps in the nude, Jiraiya screams like a banshee and jumps out the closed window, I put the phone down for a second because I can hear Konohamaru still rambleing on and on about what sounds like his lunch. Me and Killer get to the window and Jiraiya's full moon is sticking up and he's face down on the pavement. He then calmly gets up, brushes the dust off, pulls a piece of glass out of his side, and walks back up,
I stand there and Killer randomly jots down things in the notebook, I look up and twirl around when the door opens. Jiraiya smiles and waves at me and walks back into his Purple bedroom where he then closes the door and within seconds I hear snores. Killer continues to write and then points to the phone that still has un-intellige-id-abley words comeing out that I somehow understand,
I walk over slowly and pick it up, "Kono?"
"YEA!?"
"....I'm gonna go to bed now m'kay?"
"........OKAYTHANKSFORTALKINGNARUTOYOURMYBESTFRIENDBYE!!!" Konohamaru hangs up and I fall backwards, Killer Bee now seems to be writeing down how I chose to crawl back into my room and fall asleep,
----------------Five in the Morning
I wake up, sprawled onto my bed with the covor I half-dragged onto me before I passed out. I intended to roll-over and fall back asleep untill looking up mid-roll showed me that Killer Bee was standing on my head-board looking down on me writeing in his still-not-full-notepad,
I scream and jump to the other side of the bed, makeing the wrong move since it was reveiled to me that Jiraiya 'doesn't like' loud noises as he screamed from his room again, ran into my room (In the nude of course) Jumped out my window, but suceeded in opening it first, jumped down, made a big thud, and after a few minutes of stunned silence I heard Ayame scream, him walk back up the stairs, open the door, go into his room, and start snoreing......
"...... Now do ya' regularly wake up this early or didcha' jus' have a bad sch-med-uals?" He asked, I fell back hitting my head on the bedframe, I screamed like a little girl, fell to my side, hit the wall, screamed again, and then forced myself forward to pass out again.... I heard scribbleing,
--------------Later
I woke up glad with the fact that Orihime-the-Calendar said Saturday. Like expected, my head didn't hurt anymore, I pondered my resent boost in recovory time as I turned to my side and saw Killer Bee lying next to me in my bed..... my bed,
"....Are we comfy?" I said with a raspy voice, I felt about to cry as Killer wrote more down in the notepad,
"Yah' I jus' wan'ed a close-up ofyar sleepin' habits.....Ya kick in yer sleep,"
"Yup," All the time,
"An' talk," Only when stres- I DID WHAT?!?!?!?!?
"I DID WHAT!?!?" I closed my eyes tight as Jiraiya once again started screaming, ran into my room, jumped out the still open window.... You get the deal, ".....What'd I say?"
"Somin' like 'sha up geh ou' then a li'l moans of 'Saska' Saska' " Oh good, I don't know what a Saska is...... wait, OHMYGAWD NOT AGAIN!
Yea, I dream about Sasuke often, expecially resently, but when I started forgetting more and more of my dreams, I blamed it on stress and bad sleeping. But I also haven't been expecting 'sleepovers' anytime soon. And so, it was nine-year-old me in camp again, when I was rattleing off adventures of me and the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, I woke up and everybody was singing the song and laughing at me..... Ohgawd, flashbacks, flashbacks, flashbacks,
-------------Later
I didn't register anything after my flashback montage, but I came to and we were downstairs with Ramen infront of us, Jiraiya calmly slirped down his bowl because of the lack-o-females and Killer took notes,
"....How long was I out?"
"Ah Narato! yos were in anotha' worldfer bout' three hours," Hm, no wonder I was able to covor all of the forth grade.... Damn my life sucks, good thing I don't have low sefl-esteem or else I'd be crieing,
"How ya' doing Naruto!" Jiraiya slirped his last noodle, "Your friend Killer Bee was just tellin' me about your sleep!" Oh, my, gawd.... More flashbacks, more flash-o-backs-o!....'s........ ZOHMYGAWDZ! NOT THE WHEELBARREL! NOT THE WHEELBARREL!
"NOT THE WHEELBARREL! SASUKE!" I fell backwards (Again) and then realized I was saying it aloud again..... Killer, Jiraiya, Ayame, Teuchi and a number of customers stared at me, I looked behind me out the window maybe hopeing they'd think I had special needs and leave me alone,
I stared out the window and two people passing by caught my eye, I coulda swore in the daybreak sunlight the one guy that was laughing at me was blue. But then I saw the other guy, and for a split second I got locked on red eyes,
----------------Later again
I woke up on the tiny couch in the living room. Immidiantly thinking back and trieing to remember, the two guys had left as fast as they appered, but then I couldn't think of what had made me black out,
I remembered the screaming, I hadn't been being bothered by it but it seemed like maybe I was too used to it bringing me down. I felt just like the other times when I'd blacked out but there was the smallest diffrence, like instead of the darkness when I woke up everything was redder,
Killer Bee still wrote on his notepad but had one hand holding a washcloth on my head. In the background I focused almost annoyingly hard on makeing out Jiraiya on the phone,
"Op! sleeping booby's awake!" Jiraiya skipped over mumbleing 'Here he is' into the phone and handed it to me,
"Ello'?" I groaned,
"Hey Naruto! you feeling alright?" Iruka's trying-not-to-be-worried-voice said in my ear,
"I'm fine, just tired, haven't been sleeping right lately, my fault," I said honestly, still half-asleep,
"Okay Naruto, now your sure that's all it is?"
"Yeah Ruka' I'm fine," Yaaaaaawn, just TIRED,
"Okay Naruto, but, could you do something for me real quick?"
"Shyea, sure, what?"
".... Talk to Sasuke for a bit," He sounded about as tired as I feel, he handed the phone away and I sat up. I didn't think Sasuke'd be up so late last night and then go back to Iruka's.
"Ello?" Sasuke actually sounded cheery, which I wasn't sure if that what was scareing Iruka,
"Ey' Sasuke, whatcha' doin?"
"Nothing, just wanted to visit here for a little bit," He sounded zombie-ie too, but I couldn't put my finger on the emotion, "You pass out again loser?"
"Shyeaup, an' I feel like shit right now," I looked up and Killer was writeing rapidly on the notepad, "now, I'd love to compare dresses for the dance darling, but, yaaaaawwwn, I'm tired, and I wanna go to sleep now,"
"Okay sweetheart!" He said, and I suddenly got the sick feeling of maybe he's been hanging out with Anko too much. Oh, gawd, the worlds, the two totally opposite worlds are crashing, zomygosh, one has too much gas, zomygoshzomygoshzomygoshz I want my mommy, "Buh-bye Naruto!"
I pulled the phone away, but when I did and Iruka echoed Sasuke, I figured out that speaker phone was still on....
"Can ah' have anotha' pencil?" Killer asked Jiraiya as he held up a-... what was now a lone eraser.
"M'kay sweetheart!" Jiraiya skipped over to the kitchen, opened a drawer and through a pencil at Killer who then continued writeing, and I started to notice how not only was the speed he was writeing comical, but it was also, and this is me talking, logicly impossible,
Knock Knock Knock
Jiraiya answered the door with a anti-normal 'ELLO SIRE! WELCOME TO MAH HUMBLE HIVE!'. And the only reply were muffled chuckles, then a diffrent voice said something
"I saw that boy pass out earlier, I just wanted to check out and see if he was alright," The soft voice sounded vaguely familiar, I looked up as far as I could but once again. The only thing I saw before I passed out again were the same red eyes, and for a moment the screaming, the pressure feeling, and all of everything was gone, and all I could feel was peace, and how tired I really was.
---------Killer Bee's POV
Huh? Narato's konked out again, just like that ina' flash. Ah' well, just gonna continue writeing everah' thing ah' think of, good thing ah' write so fast.... Wonder if I should turn to the next page soon?
Anyway, Jirai' mah' man's lettin' those weird goons from earliar in. And I dunno why buh' that one guy es-
Blue blue, dablu-de-dah-blu-dah, man mah homie ova there sure is lookin' fly. So blue lika big blue berrah' he's lookin' kinda slimey but not really hairay.
Ah' man! dog why can't I just do that wit' Narato? come up with a nice li'l ryhme, I feel lika' fool wit' the busted up ryhmes- Why is it tha' I can't jus' look wit' mah' eye? Narato's pretty much, like, two or mor' otha' guys, why es it not like all tha' otha' times? ya' fool ya' fool, Killa Bee is sucha fool, can' even find a ryhme for this mah' fella' fool! Whatta life!
..... Yup, lost mah' mind there again. That otha guy, the non-blue one, has dark hair bout' Yugi's length, and creepy lookin' eyes. He leaned over tah' Narato, an' jus' brushed his head n' face. He looked'd up at me an' grinned, then walkin' ovah' to Jirai' "He's been under great deals of stress, let him sleep for awhile and he'll be good as new," Tha' guy smiled at Jirai' and jus' left. Weird-i-o-o-os
--------Later once again, Naruto's POV
Oh my gawd I'm actually pissed at myself! What's up? I can't friggin' stay awake two seconds and the-...... Holy crap it's still morning?
I feel as good as new, like friggin' magic or somethin' and the screaming was actually completely silent. For a few seconds, there was one sharp pierce and it started back up again like turning on a car, and I realized just how much it really effected me,
Now it was like thousands of people screaming, diffrent pitches, tones and voices. Almost like a friggin' carnifal ride in my damn head, the sudden burst was starting a headache and I looked around the room for a distraction.
"HEY NARUTO!"
"HIYA NARATO MAH HOMIES!!!" The beat of Jiraiya and Killer's voices put two breaks in the sound but it still thumped in my ears once they were done. I focused on their faces blocking it out and wishing for a endless conversation,
"How long was I out?" I asked, and the screams thudded out with my voice too,
"Three hours tha' firs' time, then ya' werse out for anotha' three," Killer answered. Okay, I find it hard to believe three hours of sleep made up for all my sleep deprivation but I feel fine,
"...What happened to the guy that was here?"
"Ah those boys! that kid said he was certified in first, second and thrid-aide and said all you needed was sleep!"
"Shyea' an' they left sooner hen' they came," Killer said with his arms behind his back looking into space.... He's finally... stopped..... writeing....
"...You run out of room Killer?"
"...Huh? nah' I jus' wan'ed ta-...... WAIT FERYA!!!!" He jumped across the room like a man dodgeing a bullet for the president, went through the kitchen and grabbed his notebook, hitting his head on the counter. He jumped up like nothing happened and skipped back over to us, ".... Why ya' look so confused?"
".... I, don't, know," He scribbled on the notebook and didn't stop for five minutes, "..... Dude, is there anything more you need?"
"Hm? wella' was thinkin' thatcha' could spen' tha nigh' at mah place now!" ..... Why do I see porn everywhere?
---------At a time after that one,
"The.... bus?"
"Shyea, I takit' everyday," Oh gawd, oh gawd, oh gawd, oh gawd, last, time, took, public, bus, oh gawd, oh gawd, oh gawd,
--------Flashback-Sasuke's POV
"Naruto!" I hopped up and down waiting for Naruto to kick it into gear.
Yesterday we rode the bus to Sakura-Chan's house, and we're going back cause I forgot my Gameboy, and I think Naruto's going really slow cause on the way back last night there was the goonies from downtown! Naruto's got secret clausterphobia so I think that sitting in the back of the rickity tiny-bus didn't help either,
"Naruto hurry up!" I said again, he was still pretty much in the same spot he was before, give or take a few centimeters. "The bus will be here in five minutes!"
"Oh yeah!? well how's it you know that!?" He whined, like usual. I held up my hand with my Digimon watch and Naruto pouted, he still can only tell time with digital clocks,
"Hurry up Naruto!"
"Shut up! you just said that you- you-... butt-head!" I laugh and Naruto's face turns several shades of red.
He runs up and attempts to wack me, but I just step to the side and he trips, " Are we alright Naruto?"
"....Syea," He sits up and pouts. The bus finally comes and the door opens to Mr. Ibiki Morino, our super-scary gym teacher from second grade,
I hear Naruto squeak and shudder, from the size and clean-smell this is one of the more deluxe buses, but Naruto has always been scared of Morino-Sensei,
"Sasuke! it's nice seeing you again!" He smiles at me and I smile back (Where as for me, Morino-Sensei was one of my favorite teachers cause he's really nice out of class) He looks down at Naruto, and puts on a playful demented expression from under all his war-scars on his face, "Hello, Naruto Uzumaki,"
"Hi Morino-former-Sensei!" I call, looking down at Naruto he looks about to pee his pants,
"H-h-h-h- YES SIR!"
Naruto runs on past him, I step up and leaning over the bus is mostly empty except for a bike rider, and old man and a librarian-looking lady. But Naruto cradled his legs in the very back sucking the nail of his thumb like he does when he's in an embarressing situation,
Morino-Sensei looks down at me "You boys can just ride for free then,"
"Thank-you Morino-former-Sensei!"
"Just call me Ibiki boy," He smiled, turning back to the road, "Hold on Naruto!"
I grap the pole for a second and Ibiki jerks the bus forward, Naruto lets out a little scream and I smile again,
Later, when we got to Sakura's, she then beat him up for putting glue in her shampoo,
"NARUTO!" She yells as me and Naruto get off the bus and he clings to me. He screams again and trys to run as she tackles him and her friend Ino trys to calm her down and pull her away. Her mom hands me the Gameboy as I watch Sakura use her solid-spiked pink hair to stab Naruto,
-----------Present day
....Hm-hm, that's why Naruto's scared of buses now, "Checkmate," I beat Kabuto in chess the third time in a row,
He glares at me and I accomplish a little victory-smirk. He throws the board agenst the wall and stomps off to whine and vent with the rest of the little girls, heh, he's just mad cause Cho went to the ball with Cedric and didn't give him the time of day untill Cedric turned into a vampire and ran off with Carlise,
---------------Naruto's POV
"NO! NO I CAN'T DO IT! YOU CAN'T MAKE ME KILLER BEE YOU BLOODY BASTARD!" I SCREAM! OHMYGOSH AND I CRY! I CRY LIKE A SCARED LITTLE GIRL CAUSE I AM, A SCARED LITTLE GIRL!!!!
"Narato ya' fool! just calm down an' get on tha' bus! m'kay? comon homey I just said the word, an' I'm tellin' ya your tears they be absurd, it's just a little bus Narato mah' ho-me, it's just a bus don't be absurd I'll get ya a po-ny, PLEASE NARATO! jus' get on board,"
"I'M SORRY SAKURA! IT WAS JUST A JOKE! PLEASE MOMMY PLEASE MAKE HER STOP! IT HURTS OHMYGOD INO! SASUKE DO SOMETHING!!!"
-----Later
Hhhh, p-p-please let it have stopped'ed mommy, please let it have stopped'ed ZOMGOSH NOEZ!
"Narato?"
"GRANDPA!"
"NARATO! DUDE' MAH' HOMEIE WALK AWAY FROM THA' LIGHT!"
I snap out of it after seeing that we're not moveing anymore, we're on a messy street-corner and I smell old people foot-sweat and feel the tears welled up in my eyes, "..... Wha' happend?"
"Uh, We took'ed tha' bus," We- WHAT!?
"We- WHAT!?"
"Shyea man. Why wer'ya all cryin and booin' an- hue-hue-huein' I tell ya I was this close to lu-lu-losein' buh' then ya got' all quiet and I saw this guy from class, we talked and shalked and you wus all brooked' then I goh' off, buh' membered you wus on, so I ran be-'hine tha bus an' it stopped real un-soft, an' "
"- Okay! okay.... I have bus-phobia, 'kay?"
"....." He pulls out his notebook out of seemingly nowhere, "Why?"
"...."
---------Later
I told him the whole story, yes, the horrid story that to this day still makes me shudder and Sasuke laugh, Killer Bee wrote down on his notebook for about fifteen minutes after I'd stopped talking,
Now we're in a crummy part of town, gunshots are heard in the distance and I think that's blood in the street, I've watched the news here and everything seems relatively normal.... as in that creepy normal..... perfect happy normal..... Stepford Wives (The original) normal.... "Killer?"
"YES?!" He yells in my face, looking as curious as a five-year-old,
"....Where's, your house?" I asked,
"Mah' house es the bomb ho-me, even though the lan' lords a bit loo-ney. I live here wit' a few close rel-ah-tives did I mention mah' brotha's in the sen-et"
......Sen-et?...... M'kay then, but he points to a dirty white-bricked apartment building,
"....Niiiiice,"
"Now it's time ta' wipe our feet, cusa mah' cousins all nice-n-neat now lets wi-wi-wi-wipe our feet, then she might get us somethin' sweet!"
--------Later
We walked inside, it was actually less filthy then I thought, like it was supposed to look like I pictured it but someone attempted to clean it up, it was small but the kind of small that some can deal with and other's can have heart-attacks in, Killer smiled as he showed me. The kitchen was dirty but only because there were dishes in the sink, and then there was a kinda-big white living room, that acutally looked decently clean, as in, the whiteness looked like it was still the color it was when it was bought, there was a fireplace that I had no idea how could fit in here, and then three doors,
"Welcome! to mah humble pad!" He said, finally not rapping, I smiled best anyone could for just being dragged out of school on a forced sleep-over with a twenty-somethin' looking teen,
"Kirabi?" A girls voice called, out of one of the door's came a professional-looking girl, she looked a little like Killer-Bee with smaller mucles and red hair, shoveing things into her black-suade purse while holding a briefcase, "There you are, now I don't have to lock the door," She... was..... hot..... More then Miss Kurenai and Yugito together.
"Ah! mah babe!" He ran over and attempted to hug her, but she moved out of his way makeing him trip on the coffee table, and then he got right back up smileing like nothing happened, "Narato! This is my gorgous cousin! I call her MAGNIFICANT!"
"That's not my name Kirabi,"
"It's Killer Bee,"
"Yeah yeah," She said, like she'd heard it a thousand times, "It's nice to meet you Naruto, I'm Karui, and I hope we can get together sometime and properly introduce ourselfs. But I have a meeting I'm late for," She said as she walked past me out the door, "And- 'Killer'?- Please hide the newspaper so you-know-who doesn't have a breakdown again," She shut the door and I heard her heals clack down the steps,
"Who's 'you-know-who'?" I asked,
"Mah' other cousin Omoi, A.K.A. Lookuz, he's a wack case who- 'ova thinks', -as in one time ah' broke mah nose an' mah brotha called him in his office an' he though' it wus causa him puttin' mayo on his tater's...O.... And then I hav' a even GORGOUSER third-cousin-twice-removed next to her," He said pointing to the empty doorway,
Is that a word? popped into my head, but I just replied to myself with 'Believe it' "Soooooo then..... Now what?"
"....... I DUN' KNOW!" He said throwing his arms up and smileing like an idiot.... I'm starting to like this guy,
----------Later again
Me and Killer actually fell asleep on his couch, he told me a buncha storys about him and his family. dateing from yesterday when he told his one cousin Karui he'd be kidnapping me to when he was two, and his brother ate his favorite Barney spork,
I woke up at probably two or three in the morning by the door,
"Well look what the Bee dragged in," A crop-cut bleach blonde lady walked inside wearing a red suit. She was pale with fox-like eyes holding her purse, she put a blanket over Killer Bee as I stretched, "Your probably Naruto, I suppose?" .... Did I mention her boobs put Principal Tsunade to shame?
"Yeah, yaaaaawn, he dragged me over here,"
"He kiddnaps his friends often, I couldn't count the times Yugito's spent the night and when Yagura's been suckered into staying, make yourself at home, it won't be the last time your here I'll assure," She sat down in the chair across from me and held out her hand "I'm Samui, Killer would of reffered to me as Miss, Gorgous," I shook her hand, to distracted by her cold voice, name, and hands to stare at her chest.
"Killer's still not awake?" Karui from earlier came through the kitchen doorway, letting down her hair and un-doing the buttons on her shirt,
"Must you really strip with company?"
Karui sat down in another one of the couches "Naruto do you think I'm hot?"
".... Yeah, but I also don't think your a pedo,"
She smiled, "Don't be fooled, I'm fifteen, but you don't mind do you?" I checked her half-open blouse that just barely showed a black-lace bra that hadn't even caught my attention till I looked, so I nodded my head pointing to Samui,
"These gain more attention," Samui was complaining about Karui when her blouse wouldn't even close, and she had a tight T-shirt under it to covor everything,
"Hey, secretary's get more money when the business men keep coming by for meetings just to see them!" Karui joked, and from the look on Samui's face it was one she used regularly, I laughed thinking about how lucky Killer is, ex di! Gets to sit between two cat-fighting girls all day!
Samui changed the subject, probably wanting Karui to lose a reason to talk, "You can sleep in Omoi's room, he's out,"
"Nah I can stay here on the couch," Hee-hee, I like Karui, and Samui's failed attempt made her flinch and leave the room, "But can I use the phone?"
"Sure tough-guy," Karui (Now my offical older sister in my book) led me to the kitchen phone.
I just dialed Sasuke's number knowing Iruka'd handle Konohamaru's rage and that he was probably the only one still awake anyway, and Anko picked up again
"Ello' mah little pretty stranger! this is the Orochi-Chan morgue! would you like a free finger nail that may or may not contain serial killer DNA?" She gidded, I would have laughed if it wern't for the fact that I was calling from a strange number meaning that I might have been anybody,
"Ank's? it's Naruto,"
"SASU-CHAN'S HUBBIE! Sasu-sasu-sasu-SASUUUU-CHAAAAN! phone fer' ya!" I also would of thought she was drunk if I didn't know this was her regular personality,
"Hello?"
"HEY SASU-CHAN!" I yelled, Karui was laughing cause she already heard Anko's greeting, who was heard in the background faintly chanting 'Sasu-Naru-Sasu-Naru-Uke to the To-Sasu-Naru!'....... hold it, HEY!
"Yes, yes, yes, Naru-Kun, what now?"
"Hi!"
"Hello to you too, now do you have a reason for waking me?"
"You were already awake,"
"And do you want me to not sleep at all?" He said, but of course his voice showed he's planning to, but I still through back at him a big old-
"Better not! I haven't come over with the 2-liter of coke and porn yet!" Karui was offically on the floor laughing her ass off, Samui looked at her weirdly and I could hear Sasuke's grunts of holding-head-in-embarressment-ness,
"Goodbye, Naruto,"..... He hung up on meh! ZOMG he hung up on meh!....eh!
"Are the two of you done?" Samui growled,
"Yeah, yeah, yeah! I'll go back to bed now!" I walked back over to the couch and Samui grumbled dragging Karui back to their rooms,
------------Next day
"MORNIN' NARATO'S!!!!" Killer Bee woke me up, I don't know why but I have a weird reaction that whenever I'm screeched awake I roll-over..... curiouser and curiouser,
Now I of course rolled-over right off the couch, "...Ow,"
"You kay' Narato?"
"Yeaaaaah.... Can I go HOME now?!"
"Come on buddie! your no fun!"
"Listen, we have school, so please, I wanna change my clothes," And secretly get out of here before Samui wakes up,
"Fine!"
"AND WE'RE WALKING!"
"Fiiiiine!"
-----------------Later
"An' finally!" Killer asks his last question he hadn't SHUT UP the whole way home, which was actually a really long walk, "......What's you favorite color?"
I stared at him, realizeing that was the one thing he hadn't asked me this whole time, he made me show him childhood pictures and what my favorite band was but he hadn't asked the most simple, and annoying.... question,
".....Blue?"
"THAT'S IT!" He through the notebook behind him into the trashcan, I started crieing softly in my head, and he rapped, "YA' FOOL YA' FOOL! if ya' don' know Narato then yar a darned FOOL! he's a buddie who likes ta make people feel the funneh MOOD! Narato like bowls of FOOD and the color BLUE! He's a little kooky sometimes, but hey HE'S AWSOME! Narato mah fool! his personality-an-his-abilitys are- pop-pop-POPPIN!"
I stared at him, feeling drained, tired, and ever so slightly emo,
"Thanks for the good time Killer Bee, I'm in love with your cousin 'Magnificant', and I hope to shower you with questions someday of how much of Samui is real," I turned and walked up inside Ichiraku and up the steps, Killer cheered and waved goodbye,
So, incredibley, glad, to be HOME! I throw the door open and throw my backpack across the room, I was about to half-sleep-walk to my room till I noticed Jiraiya standing there leaning agenst the wall on the phone, looking strangely normal, "Ey' Pervy, you there?"
"...Yeah he just got home," He smiled and handed me the phone,
-----Jiraiya's POV
Naruto put the phone to his ear and listened to Iruka's voice, he greeted him smileing and chatted for a few moments,
Iruka's joy couldn't hold the news in for long, I saw Naruto's face soon soften into a look of beautiful wonder, his lips moved softly, trying to understand what he just heard,
Yes, Naruto's eyes are good ones, they show every page of life in them, and a new, thrilling page just turned,
Iruka told only me the news of what's gonna become a climax in Naruto's life, but, he with-holds that information now, letting this page in his eyes glimmer brightly as Naruto's tender lips curve up in that smile he inherited from his father,
"I'm going home," He spoke so softly, as this chapter ends, in Naruto's youthful and hopefully happily-never-ending chapter, "I'm going home!"
Yes, 'The Tales of the Gallant Jiraiya' the sequel will be one for the wonders, this one entitled, 'The Tales of the Great Naruto Uzumaki'
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Finally done! XD
took me abot a week or more to finish this chapter
THREE MORE CHAPTERS FRIENDS! yes, I quoted Jiraiya's last words, because I love Jiraiya, and his story will forever be on the best-seller shelf in my heart ^_^
WEEEEE! I had a buncha stuff to say but I don't remember it any more!
I also quoted Naruto Ultimate Ninja Shippuden 4, and kinda the Last Unicorn, but hey, it's Jiraiya HE'S A AUTHOR! his mind narrates like a book!
WE LOVE YOU JIRAIYA!
.... XD I can't stop TALKING ABOUT HIM now.......
WE LOVE YOU JIRAIYA!
XD anyway, oh yes, mothers boyfriend got pulled over, but mister super-nice-cop-man let him go without arrest for driving under suspended license, so we just really have to pay to get the truck towed out of the impound lot and court fines.... And keep walking to the bus...... wha,
But I'll be spending the weekend with my granma! who has a computer that I've probably just posted this chapter on! yay fo Jiraiya, and the never-ending story, of the Great Naruto Uzumaki!
