Hey ole Friend, thanks for callin'
It's good to know somebody cares
Yeah she's gone, but I don't feel like talkin'
It might be just too much to bear
To hear somebody say it stops hurting
Or to hear somebody say she ain't worth it
Jason's going through the motions. Waking up, getting dressed, going to the warehouse to avoid Sam in any way. He knew he'd have to go through with the wedding. Its the only thing he has left in his life right now that makes sense. Because everything else in his life was completely insane.
Pulling out the books to balance them, he tries to focus on anything to get his mind off of her. It had almost killed him the last time she left, but this time he's sure it will. Everything inside him broke and now he wasn't sure he'd be able to put the pieces back together.
"Up for some company?" Francis questions, half his body showing from behind the door.
"No." Jason states, keeping his focus on the books.
"The guys are worried." Francis presses on. "Sam's been calling us...she's afraid for you."
"I don't care what you all think or how you feel." Jason says firmly. "I'm fine so drop it."
"You're not fine." Francis opens the door all the way. "You've been in five bar fights in the last two days. That the pure definition of not okay."
"Since when did this become okay?" Jason finally looks up at him. "We're not friends. Stop acting like we are."
"You're right." Francis says plainly. "We aren't friends, but she's my friend and I owe it to her to make sure you're okay."
"If she cared about me, she'd be here." Jason states, returning his focus to the books. "Now leave before I shoot you where you stand."
Francis walks out of the room. He had been surprised to hear that Elizabeth had left with Robin, she hadn't told him anything about it, which was strange in and of itself. With her gallery opening in a couple weeks, he was so sure she'd be here for it. Not wanting to push either of them, Francis has decided to let her cool down for a couple more days before he checks up on her in Venice.
You don't know her like I do
You'll never understand
You don't know what we've been through
That girl's my best friend
And there's no way you're gonna help me
She's the only one who can
No, you don't know how much I've got to lose
You don't know her like I do
"What?" Jason snaps at the knocking at his door.
"Whoa, relax." Johnny says, walking into the office. "What's with you?"
"Sorry." Jason sighs, running one hand down his face in frustration. "What do you want?"
"I know you hate it when people check on you, but that's why I'm here." Johnny says firmly. "You're not acting like yourself."
"I wish people would stop telling me how I should act." Jason states angrily. "What I do is my business! No one else but mine."
"That's where you're wrong." Johnny counters with conviction. "The people that love you have a right to be worried for you."
"I appreciate that." Jason says, closing the books and pushing it aside. "But its my life to ruin if that's what I want."
"Or here's a suggestion, do the sane thing!" Johnny snaps, tired of this version of his friend. "She ran...run after her! Stop doing the selfless thing and go after what you want."
"If she wanted..."
"Yeah, yeah...she'd be here, blah blah blah." Johnny rolls his eyes. "Ever thought that maybe...just maybe she wanted to know if she was worth fighting for? Maybe she loves you too, but she doesn't want to get in the way of your obligation to Sonny."
"She's the one that walked away." Jason states. "No matter what I say...she's gone."
"Who the hell are you and what have you done with my best friend?" Johnny counters, pulling open the door. "The Jason I know would never give up on someone he loved."
"She gave up." Jason states. "Not me."
"That's not what it looks like from where I'm standing." Johnny counters, shaking his head. "If you love her the way you say you do, go after her. The best things in life are worth fighting for."
I can't forget, I'm drowning in these memories
It fills my soul with all the little things
And I can't cope, it's like a death inside the family
It's like she stole my way to breathe
Don't try to tell me it stops hurting
Don't try to tell me she ain't worth it
Once Johnny is out the door, Jason stares at it, thinking back on the many years of friendship he and Elizabeth shared. The good and the bad, each one he wouldn't trade even if his life depended on it. Sitting there he wonders if there was something to what Johnny told him.
A part of him wanted to do just that. To get on a plane and fly to Venice. Lord knows that their friendship deserved a face-to-face goodbye - if that's what she really wanted. Even though the last thing he wanted was to tell her goodbye, he deserved the chance to.
Of course, there was the other part of him that didn't want to face her. The part that didn't want to hear the words from her mouth. To see the look on her face as she told him that whatever was happening between them could no longer be.
The note was one thing. To actually stand in front of her and hear the words from her mouth, it was just too much to bear. Grabbing his jacket, knowing he wasn't going to get any real work done, Jason left to talk to Sonny. Maybe he could help him put things into perspective.
You don't know her like I do
You'll never understand
You don't know what we've been through
That girl's my best friend
And there's no way you're gonna help me
She's the only one who can
No, you don't know how much I've got to lose
You don't know her like I do
"She left a note?" Sonny looked at him curiously. "That's it?"
"That's it." Jason sighs, pouring himself a drink. "Johnny thinks I should run after her. To prove that I love her."
"Don't you think she knows by now?" Sonny counters. "If she wanted to be with you, don't you think she'd be here?"
"That's what I said." Jason shakes his head, downing the glass of scotch. "I don't know what I should do."
"If she was worth having, she would stick around." Sonny says simply. "You deserve someone that will stick around, man."
"I guess." Jason downs another glass of scotch. "But maybe Johnny's onto something...maybe I should go to her and at least say goodbye face-to-face."
"Or you can just make it a clean break." Sonny suggests. "If she wants to leave you...maybe you should just let her go."
You don't know her like I do
You'll never understand
You don't know what we've been through
That girl's my best friend
There's no way you're gonna help me
She's the only one who can
No, you don't know how much I've got to lose
You don't know her like I do
Jason leaves Sonny's a little confused. On the one hand, he always said that everyone deserves to make their own choices. If she wants to be out of his life, he should give that to her. BUT, on the other hand, he loves her and he never gives up on the people he loves. Didn't he deserve the chance to say goodbye to her? Though it was only a note, she had her chance to say goodbye. Didn't he deserve the same chance?
Going off of chance, Jason calls the airline, buying the a ticket on the first flight out of Port Charles. Forsaking all the heartache that will be his reality once she says goodbye to his face, Jason had to see her. He had to say goodbye. One thing he learnt from both Elizabeth and Robin, saying goodbye is important and he had to have that chance. In spite of everything that has happened, he needed that to move on.
A/N: Thank you for the reviews, we hope you keep up with them.
-ROCkER & The Jackal's Vixen-
...You Don't Know Her Like I Do by Brantley Gilbert...
