Sire
By Knightmare
Kristin knew what they had to do. She didn't need to understand a lot about magic to see it. Willow knew it too, but instead Willow was working herself into the ground looking through every book they had here, and making a list of books to get next. Kristin shook her head slowly from side to side and let out a deep breath.
"If this takes much longer I might become dangerous." Kristin spoke up, startling Willow, who was starting to sag like she was going to fall asleep in a book. "I hadn't eaten, I was too upset to be able to stomach, the… well the blood you give me." Kristin bit back how stinky and nasty that blood was on a regular occasion, but with her being worried about Willow she just couldn't choke it down. Kristin's eyes stared into Willow's and it hurt to admit to this. "The longer I'm in here the nicer your heart beat sounds to me. I want to say I'd never hurt you sire, but this is going to take days isn't it?" It was manipulative, what she was doing, but days without food would make her crazy and it was a risk she couldn't take. One meal of her sire would be heaven, but eternity without her would be hell.
"It won't take that long." Willow said with confidence and Kristin just quietly sighed again.
"I would like to serve you in that way." Kristin spoke softly, her voice a little deeper. "Sire, I get so lonely." Willow blushed and the heat of blood so close to the surface made Kristin stare. "Maybe you'd have to tie me down if I'm hungry, but it could still be good." Kristin imagined being able to bite Willow in the heat of passion and knew that wasn't possible, but it was a nice fantasy.
"There will be no chains and funny business." Willow gave Kristin a stern look and Kristin pulled her knees closer to the body and just rested her head on them. She was getting tired too, but she couldn't risk moving or she'd get shocked again.
Willow was awake and looking more quickly through her books again. Kristin whispered a question, "Am I going to die in here? What happens to vampires that die?"
"They turn to dust, you know that, but I'm not going to let you die." Willow made a small sound that sounded a bit like a whimper but couldn't be. Kristin just tried to make herself into a small ball that could rest a little. The alarm clock suddenly clicked and the sound of Willow's radio station filled the room, warning Willow that it would normally be time to wake up and get ready for school. Kristin felt a wave of resignation hit her, knowing that Willow was going to leave her alone for hours in here. It was time for Willow to sneak out, pretend everything was normal, and steal more books to check into tonight.
"I want a pizza boy." Kristin muttered. "A big one with hot blood filled with fear. I'm so hungry."
"I'm sorry." Willow got up and walked into the bathroom, but Kristin swore she heard Willow's voice tremble. It made Kristin feel bad, even though her comment hadn't been mean spirited. It was just wishful thinking out loud.
…………..
"No." Willow stared into surprised eyes as Buffy backed up a bit at the forceful delivery of the rare word. Willow was mad at herself for not saying it yesterday and there was no way she was staying after school today after leaving Kristin trapped like that. "I have things I have to do Buffy. All those things I was supposed to do last night, but I didn't because I went dancing with you."
Xander came in smiling, "So is Willster up with the Pizza bonanza?" Willow turned to him and shook her head. He knew her well enough to recognize the resolve face.
"I have work to do. I have to pass." She told him and then started to pick up her backpack. It was a brief meet in the library before leaving, but it was time to go. She had the books she needed hidden in her bag.
"Will, are you okay?" Buffy asked gently and Willow sighed heavily.
"I'm fine. I just have a lot to do." She smiled just a little to try and make Buffy believe her, but it looked doubtful that she did.
"Will, I'll find and stake all those Vampwill vamp's for you. You don't have to worry." Buffy said just the wrong thing and Willow flinched a little at the thought. "I promise, a vampire won't get near you."
Buffy would have been shocked to realize how near her a vampire was, or that Willow was trying one last desperate thing before allowing that vampire even closer. Buffy survived sex with a vampire, and Kristin didn't have a soul to lose and wasn't a childe, she was just a pet.
Willow was a nervous wreck, because if she didn't find some other answer tonight she was going to have to give Kristin her virginity. It was only fair, she caused this mess. It wasn't how she'd envisioned losing it, but if her choices were to watch Kristin starve to death or have sex with her the decision was already made. Willow wouldn't starve anyone to death, not even someone she didn't like. There was no way she'd make Kristin go another day without blood.
"It's just homework and college applications Buff." Willow gave a weak smile to cover up her real concerns. Sure college was another big decision she was making, but right now it didn't seem all that pressing anymore.
"You know you can always talk to me right?" Buffy asked and Willow smiled at her friend. If only that were true, and usually it would be, but Buffy wasn't someone Willow could talk to about this. There was no one she could talk to about this. Willow really wished she could trust someone to understand. Kristin was her responsibility, Kristin was hers. They would never understand. They'd tell her to just open the windows and let the sun take care of the vampire if she didn't want to watch her starve, and Willow just couldn't even think about that.
……………….
On her way home Willow stopped off at the butcher shop and just stood there, wondering what might be better than cow or pig. She nibbled on her lip as various people came in and ordered. She sighed heavily as she held back.
"Psst." A voice from the back door called and Willow turned to see a younger man that clearly was the butchers son waving her closer. "You're the girl that gets the blood right?" He glanced out at the sun meaningfully and then back at her. Willow's eyes widened to realize he knew what went on out there in the dark. "Look, I can get human for a price. Fix your vampire friend right up."
Willow's jaw dropped as she stared at him. As a human he wasn't immune to being a monster apparently.
"You are Angel's friend right?" He asked and Willow nodded quickly, seeing the miscommunication and hoping it worked for her. "He comes in here at night sometimes, and he's saved my pa before, so I can arrange for a delivery to the hospital to get lost. I don't actually work here with my dad, I'm an intern at the hospital." And suddenly he wasn't a monster, Willow was a liar. She arranged to drop by the hospital in an hour where she'd get something that would hopefully make Kristin forgive her. Something she never wanted to feed her vampire, but felt compelled to now.
It would be better if Kristin weren't hungry if they really ended up having sex, Willow thought. Her body was nervous and her heart pounding as she waited in the parking lot, knowing she'd just barely make it home before dark and she'd be carrying stolen blood.
……………..
After Willow put away the blood, hiding it a bit even though she hoped it would be used tonight, she stalled. She found herself making a snack, drinking some juice, and being ever so reluctant to go upstairs. She muttered to herself about being a coward and finally grabbed her book bag and went to see how Kristin was.
Kristin sat on the floor looking depressed and helpless and Willow dropped her book bag and moved to her side quickly, feeling bad for stalling now. "Hey, I'm back." She smiled a little but noticed how slowly her little vampire looked up, and that the vamp grr face was on.
"You can't let me go." Kristin sounded like she'd been crying. "I'm too hungry, and I can't hurt you." Willow felt like her heart stopped hearing Kristin put her safety first and her eyes became a little glassy. "I'm not strong enough to fight this, and I just want blood so bad."
"I bought you some." Willow spoke soothingly, seeing tears trail down Kristin's face.
"It's bad. It's gross, and I want human. I'm sorry I'm so weak, but I'm so hungry." Kristin surely couldn't see through those tears. "Sire, you're my sire and I can't live without you, but I can't promise your safety right now. Just open the window Willow, just open it."
"Oh Goddess, no." Willow sat down heavily next to the forcefield and put her hands on the magical shield. "No, you aren't to ask me to do that." Willow felt like her own guilt would eat her alive, knowing she caused this. It couldn't go on any longer, she couldn't research for hours leaving Kristin like this. Being this close she could see how even for a vampire Kristin was too pale, and how shaky her body was. She could see the dark circles under her eyes that showed the vampire had precious little sleep in far too long. "I bought human for you. Once I do the spell you are to go downstairs and eat your fill, before we complete the ritual." Willow's hands were shaking as she pulled the book that had the spell she'd cast in it. "You'll be my first Kristin, and I need you to be in control of yourself and be gentle."
"You don't want me." Kristin's voice was softer, hurt.
Willow opened the book to the right page. "I don't want you to leave me, in any way. Do you want me?" Willow fidgeted a little as she waited for the answer, Kristin was taking a little too long to answer.
"Yes, but No." Kristin defied her openly and Willow just stared. "No, if you don't really want me then what you're asking me to do is horrible. I'll lose you, you won't be able to be around me. This is a mistake. This is supposed to be special. My first time was wasted, clumsy, and awkward and I didn't like it. I was with someone because I thought it was the right thing to do, and I hated every second. Even if we can not call this rape, it will be like that for you. If I'm not outright raping you, you'll hate every minute of it. And with a spell like this I'm supposed to make you enjoy it. I can't, I'm not that good. I can't make you want me if you really don't."
"This is my fault." Willow spoke softly, but her heart ached, because with Kristin's words Willow felt like the demon really had a beautiful soul. It shouldn't be there, but Willow really wondered it if were.
"I don't want to be your punishment." Kristin had never been so forceful, the vampire didn't submit to this. It was nice to see that Kristin would stand up for some things, but Willow didn't know what to do now. Apparently the vampire realized this, because her head bowed again. "Willow, sire… if you ever want sexual service I'll gladly give it. If you ever need to make me submit by violence I'll submit. If you need me to work, I'll work. I have no problems with these things. You give me so much, I have no problem with what you ask for in return. I know what I am and I know how lucky I am to have a sire that cares for me. Most vampires like me probably don't even live as long as I have. I know I have it good. Please, try to find a different way. Making yourself the sacrifice in this will only hurt both of us. I want you, I really do. I want, you to want sexual service. I want you to want it, me. I feel safest when you touch me." Willow could barely breath as the words she was hearing seemed to sear themselves into her mind.
"It's okay." Willow stopped the fast and heartfelt words. The book in her hand fell to the floor and she just stared at Kristin. She'd never known the depth of the bond they had. She really had nothing to fear from her vampire, because her vampire loved her. "We'll think of something else, then you can drink up that human blood I bought you."
Kristin seemed to release a tense breath and nodded. Willow wasn't so sure she wouldn't be willing to have sex with her vampire now. She'd never felt so soft and cuddly inside before, all from Kristin's words.
……………..
