Hello, my loves! I'm so sorry this took a while to get out! I'm home for the holidays with my family and they make it a little hard to concentrate on my writing! Buuut its here now and I think you'll all love it! This chapter makes me really happy :) Enjoy!

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the intellectual property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of Stephenie Meyer. No copyright infringement is intended.

Thank you Leah, for keeping this from being a worthless chapter :) I loves ya!


Chapter 11: Fearless

"'Cause I don't know how it gets better than this
You take my hand and drag me headfirst, fearless
And I don't know why but with you I'd dance
In a storm in my best dress, fearless"

-Taylor Swift

"Bella, that's got to be the most disgusting thing I've ever seen," Edward said, wrinkling his nose and raising his eyebrows at me while I took another huge bite of my burger.

Containing my giggles, I closed my eyes and moaned at the taste, onion, lettuce, and bacon hanging from my mouth as I chewed. I opened my eyes and looked to Edward to see him shudder with obvious disgust.

I laughed, using my napkin to wipe the ketchup from the corners of my mouth. I might have been exaggerating my enjoyment of the burger slightly, but it was worth it to see the repulsion on his face as I ate.

"It's delicious," I said when I finally swallowed. "Try it."

I held the burger in front of his face and waved it under his nose. "Come on, Edward, just try it!"

He suddenly surprised me by snatching the burger out of my hands and taking a huge bite.

"There. You happy?" he asked, his mouth stuffed with the beef, lettuce, and tomato that I had been taunting him with for the last half hour.

My mouth popped open in shock. "I thought you couldn't eat that stuff!" I exclaimed when I got my voice back.

He raised his eyebrows at me before speaking again. "I said I don't eat it. That doesn't mean I can't."

He made a disgusted face before taking a deep swallow, finishing the bite of the burger he had taken. "It's like humans and... well, like humans and dirt I guess. You could eat it, but you never would."

"That's disgusting," I laughed.

He shrugged and pointed to my food. "No, that's disgusting."

OoOoOoOoOoOoO

When I finished eating, Edward led me outside into the cool evening air, taking my hand in his as we walked down the sidewalks of Seattle. People passed us, some hurrying home, some shopping, and others just wandering, like us, down the streets, simply enjoying time together.

We talked about our lives, I spoke of growing up; he spoke of being. We talked about our families, I told him about my hair-brained mother and my distant father; he told me about the loving family dynamic that had formed in his home over one hundred years. I learned about the way he and his family lived, and in turn, I told him why I had escaped Forks after high school. Being with Edward felt completely natural, despite our obvious differences. Talking to him made me feel warm inside, despite the cool Seattle air blowing around us. It was as if our souls were old friends, our bodies were simply catching up.

Once during our walk, I noticed a couple around our age. He was holding her hand, looking at her while she spoke. His eyes held unfathomable emotion; she looked as though she could live and die happily in his arms. It was obvious that they were the most important things in each other's worlds; they were a couple in love.

I wondered what people saw when they looked at Edward and me. Would they see the protective way he held me close? Would they see the endless emotion in his features? Would they be able to see that I cherished his very being? Would they see a couple in love?

Too fast, I chastised myself. I knew that I had feelings for Edward, and that I didn't want to be without him. I knew that I had never felt this way before, that I was falling in love. But could I really be in love with him? Could we really make this work?

We eventually made our way to a small park that occupied one of the city blocks, surrounded by a barricade of trees to keep out the bustling city scene. The pathways were lit by glowing lamps in a winding trail through the rows of hedges. He smiled before directing me down one path into the park, his golden eyes reflecting the soft light around us.

"Are you having fun, Bella?" he asked gently as he led me down the path.

I smiled up at him in complete happiness and nodded. "Very much."

"Good," he said, moving his arm to encircle my shoulders and give me a slight squeeze.

Eventually we made our way to a small circular pond surrounded by white benches, lit again by the glowing lights that gave everything in the park a golden glow. He sat down and pulled me to sit against him, my back against his solid chest and his arms surrounding me. He kissed my temple and we exchanged a smile before I decided to speak what had been on my mind all evening.

"Edward... can I ask you a question?" I asked slowly, turning so I could look at him while I spoke.

"Anything, Bella," he breathed into my ear.

"Is this really possible?" I barely whispered, looking up into his eyes.

His playful smile dropped and he was suddenly staring into my brown eyes with his strange, honey colored ones with a tangible intensity.

"Bella, you have bewitched me, body and soul. I never wish to be parted from you from this day on," he said, looking into my eyes with such sincerity that I almost missed the significance of his words.

I tried to contain my smile as I rolled my eyes. "That's from Pride and Prejudice," I said accusingly.

His wide, crooked smile bloomed over his face. "You said you liked Jane Austen. I was testing you."

I scoffed at his "test."

"Of course I caught it," I said, "but you still need to answer my question."

He leaned forward until his forehead was touching mine, but our faces were still angled away from each other while we spoke.

"I did answer your question, Bella. I may have used Jane Austen's infamous words, but the meaning is the same. You have captivated me, and I can't be without you. We will make this possible."

I was surprised at the rush of moisture that pricked at my eyes. Instead of trying to form words for the happiness that I was feeling, I put my arms around him and pulled him into a tight hug, pressing my cheek into his solid chest. We stayed like that for a moment, tangled together on the bench as I breathed in his rich scent and enjoyed his closeness.

"Bella," I heard Edward breathe gently into my ear.

I lifted my head from his chest and looked up into his eyes. I had never seen him look at me like this before. There was the familiar tenderness that I recognized, but there was also a certain element of lust in his eyes that I had never seen before.

"Don't move," he whispered fiercely, moving in the same moment to crash his lips into mine. He moved his hands so that our only point of contact was through our joined lips, but that was enough to send a current running through my body that I felt all the way down to my toes.

Don't move, don't move, don't move, I repeated in my head, trying to convince my hands to stay in their innocent position on my own legs. My mind spun and my thoughts jumbled as our kiss continued, and my mantra of "don't move" slowly dissolved and I found my hands moving from my legs to his, then up his abdomen and his chest, then locking around the back of his neck, pulling him closer to me in an attempt to deepen our kiss.

"Bella!" He suddenly yelled, pushing himself away from me and snatching my hands from behind his neck, holding one of my wrists in each hand in the space between our bodies. "I told you not to move!"

His eyes flashed dark and angry, and I felt my insides cower in embarrassment.

"I'm not normal, Bella," he said, his tone softening a bit as he released my wrists. "You... You can't trust me."

"But I do trust you, Edward," I said quickly. "I know you wouldn't ever hurt me."

"Don't say that!" he barked harshly, a pained expression on his face as he ran his hands through his messy bronze hair, still shining ethereally in the soft light around us.

I felt my forehead wrinkle in confusion as I waited for him to continue.

He was silent for another moment as he shook his head. "I would never intentionally hurt you, Bella. That is my worst fear. But I can't lose control... because of what I am. My... my being would hurt you, even though I have no desire to. If I let my senses take control, if I lost myself for just a moment..." he trailed off for a moment before shaking his head and continuing. "I could never forgive myself."

I searched for a response for a moment, but ended up just opening and shutting my mouth several times before shaking my head and remaining silent. It was another moment that I knew I should be afraid of Edward. In essence, he had just fought the urge to kill me. However, I could feel nothing but adoration and understanding. I had always known that Edward would never hurt me. He smelled my blood that first day in the forest when he helped me, and he had been near me numerous times since then without any problems, but a simple kiss seemed to bring out his primal instincts that he had been trying to bury for so many years.

"I'm sorry," I managed after a moment.

He lifted my chin with the tip of his finger so that I was looking into his eyes again.

"Don't be sorry, my dear Bella," he whispered softly. "You haven't done anything wrong."

He leaned down again and gently brushed his lips against mine before looking into my eyes again.

"Are you ready to go home?"

I frowned slightly, unwilling to end my time with him.

"Its nearly eleven, Bella," he reminded me softly.

I nodded. "Where are you staying?"

He shrugged as we began walking again. "I don't really need a place to stay since I don't need to sleep."

My eyes widened again. "Oh," I said. "Well, would you like to stay at my apartment? You can't just wander through Seattle all night."

At first he smiled, but his smile quickly faded and his brow wrinkled instead.

"I can't do that, Bella. Jacob doesn't like me as it is. I don't need another reason for him to hate me."

I was silent for a moment, contemplating his reasoning. It was true, Jacob hated Edward. Maybe if he didn't know...

"He doesn't have to know you're there," I said with a small smile. "Just come in after he goes to bed."

"Bella, I don't know if that's appropriate..." he began, but I cut him off.

"To Hell with appropriate," I said, waving my hand through the air as I blew it off.

He smiled that crooked smile at me. "You wouldn't mind?"

His question caused me to laugh lightly before I replied. "Quite the opposite actually-- I would love it."

He smiled widely in return and threw his arm over my shoulders, pulling me close to kiss my cheek as we walked.

I wasn't looking forward to going back home. I knew Jacob would be waiting there, ready to argue with me again about Edward. I also knew that, once again, I would end the argument upset and angry. This time, however, I knew more about Edward-- everything from his favorite color to his vampiric tendencies. Jacob could no longer argue that I didn't know enough about him, even if I couldn't share the new information with him. Besides, I couldn't imagine that the new information would do much to assuage his worries.

At that moment, I realized that Jacob was only one obstacle in the way of mine and Edward's relationship. I could not imagine that anyone would be very supportive of us. I remembered his sister Rosalie's reaction to my very presence in his home—I was very much a disruption to the happy home Edward had described to me earlier. It seemed that we had a long road of obstacles in front of us, if we could even begin to make our relationship work.

"We will make this possible," Edward's voice echoed in my head. He had spoken the words with such conviction that I had a hard time not believing them. We would make our relationship work, but at what cost?

We arrived home late, but Jacob was still awake, sitting in the living room, waiting for me. I asked Edward to wait outside the door until I could convince Jacob to go to bed, leaving me to sneak Edward into the apartment.

"Bella," Jacob greeted me curtly as I entered the foyer.

"Jacob," I said, returning his cold stare.

"Have you been out this whole time with him?" he asked.

"Yes," I replied. "And I did what you said-- I learned more about him."

"And?"

"And I still want to be with him." I wanted to tell Jacob that I couldn't think of anything that would stop me from wanting to be with Edward, but I knew he wouldn't take that news well. That particular piece of information was even a little difficult for me to swallow.

Jacob sighed and rolled his eyes.

My eyes stung with unshed tears as I watched Jacob stew in anger. I needed Jacob. I always had. Just because I now had Edward didn't mean I could be without Jacob's friendship—nothing could change the relationship I had with him.

I made my way over to the couch and sat down beside my best friend, trying to gauge his reaction to my emotional state.

"Jacob?" I said, trying to draw his attention from the TV that was running on low volume in the corner. I didn't think he was really watching it. I could tell his mind was far away.

"What?" he said flatly.

"Why are you upset?"

He scoffed and rolled his eyes again before answering. "You know why, Bella. You're being irresponsible and stubborn. You're going to get hurt."

I frowned. "We spent the entire evening learning all about each other," I told him. "I know all about him. You just have to trust me. I know what I'm doing."

"Do you really?" he asked, his tone suddenly colored with hostility.

"Yes!" I replied, my temper flaring in response.

"If you knew what you were doing you would get rid of him," he said, effectively ending the conversation by standing and stalking back to his room and slamming the door.

I sank my head into my hands as I leaned over, the tears finally flowing freely down my cheeks. I was lost in my sadness until I felt a gentle hand on my back.

"Bella," Edward whispered in his velvety, soothing voice.

"He hates me," I mumbled through my tears. "He's going to make me choose between him and you."

"Bella," he said again, moving to sit beside me on the couch, rubbing soothing circles into my back while I sobbed into my hands.

"I can't do it!" I choked out.

He took his hand off of my back suddenly as I said that, and he scooted away from me on the couch. "Okay..." he said. "I'm sorry. I should never have pressured you into this. I'll leave now."

My head shot up out of my hands and my panicked heart hammered in my chest.

"Where are you going?" I cried, my eyes filling with terror as I watched him stand and back away from me.

"I'm not going to pressure you into this," he said gently. "You said you can't do this and I completely understand."

Before he could take another step, I flew off the couch and into his arms, a fresh wave of tears filling my eyes.

"No," I choked out between tears. "No, no, no. Edward," I began, raising my face from his chest to look into his eyes. "I didn't mean that. I mean I can't choose between him and you. He's my best friend and I've known him for ages, but... I need you."

His arms came up and encircled me, pulling me close against him. His sweet musky smell calmed my tears after a few moments, and soon I was left brushing my cheeks and sniffling against the remaining tears.

"I know, Bella," he finally whispered into my hair. "I need you just as badly."

I looked up into his face and smiled through my tears. He needed me too.

We stayed like that for a long time, simply holding each other and reveling in our mutual feelings.

"You need to sleep," he finally whispered, pulling away from my hold and looking into my eyes.

I nodded and reached down to take his hand in mine. "Come with me?"

He hesitated, but only for a moment.

"Let's go," he answered.

As I got ready for bed, he watched me curiously, as if he had never seen someone get ready for bed before.

While I brushed my teeth, a thoughtful look came over his face.

"What?" I asked through a mouth full of toothpaste.

He met my eyes for a moment before speaking.

"Did you not get my gift today at work?" he asked.

His question caught me off guard, causing my cheeks to flush in embarrassment. I held up a finger to signal that I would answer when I got rid of all the toothpaste in my mouth. After I rinsed my mouth, I turned back to him.

"I did... and they were absolutely beautiful. Really-- they were the most beautiful flowers I've ever seen. But Jacob saw them while I was at work and they seemed to make him mad, so I decided to keep them at work. I didn't want to make him even more angry with me right before I told him about you."

A frown formed on his face and he nodded in understanding. Not wanting to talk about Jacob anymore, I left the doorway where I had been standing and went back into the bathroom to finish getting ready for bed.

I had to dig to the bottom of my drawer to find suitable pajamas. I found a pair of thick flannel bottoms and an old high school tee shirt that seemed appropriate to wear around Edward. When I came out of the bathroom, he laughed.

"What?" I asked as I let myself fall onto the bed beside him.

"You don't look very comfortable," he said.

I shrugged. "This isn't what I usually wear to bed, but with you here I have to put more clothes on."

A sly smile covered his face and he laughed. "Well, I wouldn't mind, if you wanted to be more comfortable..."

I rolled my eyes and threw one of the many pillows on my bed at him.

He gave me a shit eating grin and leaned over to kiss the tip of my nose.

"You ready to sleep?" he asked.

I nodded as I curled under the bedspread and pointed to the light on the wall opposite the bed. He rolled his eyes at me, but he stood and flipped the light off for me anyway. I smiled at him as he came back to my bed, marveling at the way the dim light coming through the window cast a strange glow on his skin.

When he reached the bed, he carefully tucked the comforter tightly around me before lying against my mummified form. He kept his head propped on one arm as he lay on his side, looking down at me as my eyelids began to feel heavier.

Just as my eyes fell shut, I felt his hand brush across my cheek, moving a stray piece of hair back behind my ear. His touch brought me back to consciousness and I opened my eyes slowly to look into his once more before falling asleep.

"Good night, my Bella," he whispered softly, his sweet breath clouding around me and sedating my senses even further.

"Mmm," I managed in acknowledgment before finally slipping into unconsciousness.

OoOoOoOoOoOoO

I awoke the next morning to the sound of pots and pans rattling in the kitchen. I kept my eyes shut in an attempt to shut out the noise, but after a few more minutes, I gave up on trying to sleep and opened my eyes.

The first thing I saw was a long, beautiful rose lying on the pillow next to me. The frown that had formed because of the noise suddenly disappeared and was replaced by a wide smile as I reached over to pick up the rose.

I held it to my nose and took a deep breath as I rolled over on my back and used my elbow to prop me up in bed. Right as the fragrance of the rose hit my senses, I realized exactly how many roses there were in my room. My eyes first fell on the dresser directly across the room from my bed. There were two full vases of roses sitting there, along with several loose roses just lying around the vases. My attention was caught next by another vase sitting on the bedside table, full of another dozen deep red roses. As I continued to look around the room, I realized every surface in my room was occupied by at least one vase of roses, with multiple others scattered around it. I continued to hold the first rose to my nose, enjoying the rich scent as I took in the beauty of the rest of them.

I was still sitting like that when I heard my door open a minute later.

"Good morning," Edward's velvety voice said as he walked into the room.

I turned to him with a smile on my face. "Did you do all this?"

He nodded. "Do you like it?"

My eyes widened and I nodded vigorously before throwing back the covers on the bed and running to him, throwing my arms around his neck and whispering, "Thank you so much," in his ear.

He laughed gently as he hugged me back, resting his cheek against the top of my head as he held me.

"I hate that you had to leave your flowers at work. I hope this makes up for it," he said, pulling away from me for a moment and smiling down at me. "Now go back to bed. I have one more surprise for you."

My brow wrinkled in confusion, but I obeyed, crawling back into bed and rolling under the covers again. Edward smiled at me before leaving the room. I listened intently for any noise to try to figure out what he was doing, but it was silent outside my room.

After another silent minute, the door slowly cracked open and revealed Edward, pushing the door open with his back while he held a tray in both hands. When he turned, I saw that the tray was piled high with all of my favorite breakfast foods and a tall glass of orange juice, finished with one of the roses sitting in a short vase in the corner of the tray.

"Hungry?" he asked with a smile as he set the tray down on the bed in front of me.

"Edward this is amazing!" I exclaimed as I surveyed the contents of the tray. "How did you know how to do all this?"

He just shrugged. "After one hundred and fifteen years I've come to learn how to do a lot of things."

I laughed as I picked up the first piece of bacon off the large plate in front of me.

"Are you sure you don't want to eat any of this?" I knew that he would refuse, but my manners dictated that I had to ask. "I don't know how you know how to cook so well, but this is amazing."

"It's all yours," he said, lying back against the headboard of my bed next to me and leaning his head on my shoulder.

"I've never had breakfast in bed before," I said as I took a sip of my juice.

"Really?" he replied, seeming somewhat surprised. "I thought you humans did that a lot."

I stifled a laugh as I searched for any signs of teasing in his face. "You watch too many movies, Edward," I said, finally releasing the giggle I had been holding in.

"Well how else am I supposed to know what you people do all the time?"

I shrugged before turning back to my meal. "Well now you've got some first-hand experience."

"I love first-hand experience," he said, leaning to kiss my shoulder as he spoke.

I smiled widely at him and blushed slightly as he replaced his head on my shoulder.

He closed his eyes a moment later, taking a deep breath as he did so.

"Are you okay?" I asked when I noticed the pained expression on his face.

He groaned slightly. "You're just so tempting, Bella," he said stiffly. "You blush and your pulse starts beating faster and your beautiful smell just takes me away. God, you're… you're mouthwatering."

My brow furrowed in concern. I didn't know whether to apologize and back away or to comfort him. In my confusion, I simply remained quiet and waited for him to speak again. I watched as he rubbed his temples for a moment with his eyes closed, and then put his hands over his mouth and nose to keep my smell from his senses. As I watched him, I realized I couldn't just back away and leave him alone. Even though I knew it was my fault he was struggling, I felt like I had some innate need to help him.

As I looked at the beautiful creature in front of me, all shreds of doubt melted away. Every obstacle seemed smaller, every disapproving opinion no longer mattered. It didn't matter that I had only known him for a short time—his heart had spoken directly to mine the first time we met. We would make this work, we had to. The instant attraction, the magnetic pull, the need I had for him, and the fact that I could never fear him, even as I watched him struggle for the control not to end my life, all led to one inevitable conclusion. I was completely and irrevocably in love with Edward Cullen.

He finally lowered his hands and took a breath again. His expression lightened slightly before he spoke.

"I'm so sorry, Bella."

"No, I'm sorry," I replied quickly, reaching out to place my hand on his cold cheek to offer some sort of comfort.

"After all this, you still trust me?" he asked, forcing a small smile.

I looked down into my lap for a moment before forcing the words that finally rang true in my heart.

"I can't help it," I replied. "I've already fallen in love with you."


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