A/N: This chapter is dedicated to Sasha Snape, who has not only been looking forward to it for absolutely ages, but she has been absolutely wonderful and so helpful and incredibly sweet and I cannot praise or thank her enough.
10. Greeting Bahorel's date in the morning with "Nice to meet you, you're prettier than the last one." is not funny and you run the risk of castration if you attempt it.
"Oh my fucking god." Éponine groans as she stirs under the covers. Her head is pounding and each crack of light that spills through the sheets is like a miniature explosion behind her eyes. "Owwwwwww," she whines and throws her arm over her face. "I am never drinking again."
"Ep, you express that sentiment every time you have a hangover." Enjolras's mumble comes from the bed next to her, voice thick with sleep.
Éponine cracks one eye open and squints at him. He seems to be in a very similar state to her; his curls are dishevelled, sticking up defiantly and he is frowning slightly with what she assumes is the throbbing of a headache.
"You don't seem to be faring much better."
He replies without opening his eyes. "Shhhhhh. It's only about half past 8. It's still socially acceptable to be asleep for at least another 3 hours."
Éponine rolls over to check her phone, desperately trying to ignore the way the room spins around her. The clock reads 08:29. Enjolras's uncanny ability to guess the time of day never fails to astound her.
She collapses onto her back and groans again as a wave of nausea hits her. "Euuuuugh. I feel like death."
Enjolras grumbles from next to her. "So do I. Remind me why I let R convince me to do Jagerbombs with him?"
Éponine laughs, then winces as it passes through her head as waves of intense pain. "He is very insistent."
There is a pause. "I am still shocked the marble man is so affected by alcohol. I always thought it would just pass straight through you."
"Shut up." He attempts to give her a shove but with his eyes still closed his arm meets thin air.
Éponine giggles, and shuffles towards Enjolras. He lifts up his arm when he notices the movement; she positions herself underneath it and he lets it flop down onto her back. His fingers run through the ends of her hair fondly, stroking the lavish curls with a tenderness that only Éponine was ever privy to. Enjolras sighs contentedly. Éponine cranes her neck slightly, to look at his face. The corners of his mouth are curved into a small smile, and his face is completely devoid of stress and worry. Something in her chest catches as she looks at him so utterly relaxed.
She moves so her lips are level with Enjolras's, and kisses him gently. He smiles softly, and finally opens his eyes. They gaze at other, inches apart. The gap closes as they kiss again. It becomes more heated and fervent as the seconds drag on; the dregs of sleep evaporating as hands run over bare skin. Enjolras wraps his arms around Éponine and pulls her on top of him. She kisses him hungrily until the movement sends more sickness rolling over her and she gags, hastily retreating to her earlier position on the bed.
Enjolras is breathing heavily next to her. "I fucking hate your hangovers."
Éponine laughs. When the sensation passes, she sits up. "I'm going to make some coffee."
"Éponine, you are a goddess."
She throws on some lounge pants and a tank top, as Enjolras watches from the bed.
"You're beautiful, Épona."
Éponine blushes furiously at the sentiment and the name he uses for her on very rare occasions, and smiles at him quietly before she ducks out into the living room. She winces at the bright light pouring in through the open window, and silently curses the person that forgot to close them.
When she wanders into the kitchen, there is an unfamiliar girl wearing an oversized shirt standing in the middle of the floor, waiting for the kettle to boil.
"Erm, hi. I'm Éponine."
The girl turns and grins back, talking loudly. "Hi, I'm Sophia. Oh god, sorry." She lowers her voice substantially as she watches Éponine cringe at the noise. "Rough night all round I think."
Éponine nods in agreement. A silence falls between them. "So... this is going to sound really rude, but-"
Sophia laughs and cuts across her. "Bahorel."
"Oh, okay. Would you like some coffee?"
"I was making some." Sophia gestures to the kettle.
Éponine smiles. "Yes, but would you like some decent coffee?
Sophia grins back. "You are a saint."
"Go sit yourself down in the living room, I'll bring it in for you, and Bahorel if he manages to make it downstairs."
Éponine watches the other girl wander out of the kitchen. She decides she likes her a lot.
"Woah. Who scored her last night?"
Éponine turns to see a tousled Grantaire wander into the room, rubbing sleep from his eyes.
"Seriously? That's how you're saying good morning? I'm actually surprised you're up. It's before midday."
Grantaire rolls his eyes but otherwise ignores her. "But really, Ep. Who is she?" He turns his head subtly and eyes her up through the doorframe.
Éponine kicks him hard in the shin.
"OW! What was that for?"
"If you must know, she's Bahorel's date from last night. Her name is Sophia."
Grantaire goes back to staring at her.
"Grantaire!" She hisses.
He turns to her and gives her a look which plainly says what? she's hot and you know it, and turns away again.
Éponine lets out a whispered noise of frustration, and turns back to the coffee machine, busying herself for a few minutes.
"At least she's not like that one he brought home last week, she was batshit crazy."
"OH MY FUCKING GOD SHUT UP 'TAIRE!" Éponine growls at him through gritted teeth.
"What? Even you have to admit she was insane!"
Éponine has no response. The girl had been completely off the wall, and everyone including Bahorel, had been glad to see her leave. She resorts instead to glowering at her best friend. When that has no effect, she returns to the coffee and ignores him.
When it is ready, she takes a steaming mug into the living room to find Bahorel has joined Sophie on the couch, and they are cuddling and talking animatedly. She sets the cup down on the coffee table and goes back to get another one for Bahorel. As she returns to the kitchen to get drinks for her and Enjolras, she gives Grantaire a warning glare.
"Play nicely." She says under her breath.
She gives Sophia a warm smile as she crosses to her bedroom. When she walks in, Enjolras has sat up and is already engrossed in a textbook.
"You can take the boy out of the classroom, but you can't take the classroom out of the boy."
He looks up and smiles. She sets the coffee down and climbs back into bed,
Just as she is getting settled, she hears Grantaire through the door.
"Nice to meet you, you're prettier than the last one."
"That little shit." She stalks out into the living room and sees both Bahorel and Sophia sitting in stunned silence.
"Grantaire I swear to fucking God..." Éponine doesn't finish her sentence before she strides into the kitchen and grabs a large, menacing knife from the worktop. She brandishes it at Grantaire and his eyes widen in horror.
"I am going to chop your fucking balls off."
Grantaire lets out a small squeak and dives for cover. As she chases him around the room, she hears Bahorel placate a worried looking Sophia.
"They're best mates, this happens a lot."
"Apologise or wave goodbye to your testicles."
"I'm sorry Sophia! You're wonderful!"
"Now go and kiss her hand like a proper gentleman."
Grantaire scurries over to her, and Sophia laughs loudly as he brushes her knuckles with his lips.
"Thank you."
Éponine goes and replaces the knife, and Grantaire falls to the carpet in relief, clutching his groin protectively.
"Everyone! I have an important announcment to make!"
Everyone in the room turns to look at Joly, who was wandering solemnly down the stairs with an incredibly grave look on his face.
"I have developed a severe allergic reaction to the glue used to hold books together, and I will not last until midweek."
"What a dreadful catastrophe that would be. Éponine what on earth have you done to Grantaire?" Enjolras has emerged from the bedroom and has stopped to take in Grantaire's cowering form.
"It looks like she broke him by threatening to remove his genitalia. " Jehan floats down the stairs. "I think I might write a haiku about it."
"You should add this particular occurence to the list, Ep. I feel like Grantaire might need fair warning next time." Combeferre follows Jehan down the stairs.
Sophia looks perplexed. "There's a list? Of what?"
"Les Amis de l'ABC House Rules." states Enjolras proudly.
Sophia cackles. "Bahorel, you're lucky l really like you. I didn't quite realise quite what I was getting myself into when I agreed to come back to your place."
"AND THAT'S HOW WE'LL BEGIN: THE WIZARD AND I!"
Courfeyrac's voice drifts downstairs, and Éponine snorts. "No, I don't think you did."
