Chapter Ten

Keeping Secrets

-oOo-

Chloe returned home, strangely empty and nauseous. She had no choice in the matter now, it was her move. She was more frustrated that none of this was working out as planned or at least remotely easy. Fache was suspended; he couldn't help her even if he wanted to. She couldn't ask Jerome because she would be putting his career on the line along with hers, plus there was some pride left in her that refused to ask for help.

Chloe poured herself a glass of wine and sat on her sofa in her dark and quiet apartment. She had been surprised that Silas had not blindly followed her to see Aringarosa once she revealed she could take him to him. But she could understand his suspicion. He was a clever man even though his entire life was ruled by a man in the sky and a man he shot.

Chloe ran her index finger around the rim of the wine glass and starred into space. She flashed back to the last thing Silas had to her.

'That you're not as perfect as you seem'

Chloe could only imagine the look on her face when he said that. It was utterly ridiculous and she felt ridiculous though she didn't know why, especially when a tingling feeling in the bit of stomach erupted as he starred into her eyes.

Finishing off the wine she shook her head, of course it hadn't been sexual. Silas was a celibate monk, not to say he didn't have urges, but she was sure his strong beliefs and perhaps with the aid of a cilice he was able to quash those feelings.

Chloe felt disgusted with herself for even thinking that there was a sexual and perhaps caring man behind those murderous pink eyes. He had still killed, whether or not the law saw it that way and he seemed to find joy in taunting her and making her feel weak in front of him. But if anything he made her want to be stronger, to prove she was not afraid nor intimidated by anyone.

Chloe put the rest of the bottle in the fridge and curled up in her bed, the question burning in her mind. Should she tell Silas? If it meant finishing the Council of Shadows? It all weighed on her now, so would she be selfish enough to decline the monks offer, or would she finally face her demons?

-oOo-

She hardly got any rest that night, but she lay in bed until eleven in the morning, purely to allow to debate in her head to play out, but she still had not reached a decision.

Frustrated, she recalled that she had dinner plans and forced herself out of bed to shower and spend the rest of the afternoon cleaning her flat and doing grocery shopping. She felt like treating herself with a day off the case, besides it was a Sunday and she still had to make a decision.

Although the dilemma never left her mind, her apartment had never looked cleaner or the fridge as stocked as it was. She normally did get carried away when she was trying not to think about something. She had almost worked her fingers to the bone after the first four weeks since being raped.

Chloe went about the arduous task of getting dressed for her godfather's dinner. Normally she would like to just throw on a comfy pair of jeans and a shirt, but because Isabella and Jonas would be there, she would have to make an effort. Both were the very wealthy and proper neighbours of Jerome. She never understood why they and her godfather were friends as they were completely different. Jerome liked beer, they liked wine. He liked football, they liked tennis. He holidayed in Toulouse or Bordeaux; they took their private yacht to the Mediterranean.

Chloe chose a nice pair of black trousers with an elegant frilly top, a silver pendant given to her by Jerome last Christmas and her only pair of high heeled ankle boots. Just as she had finished applying her make-up, Jerome called her mobile to let her know he was waiting in his car downstairs. With a final spritz of Chanel on her wrists, she grabbed her handbag and rushed down the stairs to join him.

Jerome's house was ridiculously large for just one person, but since his wife died, he felt loathed to move because of the many memories the house held. There were two bedrooms, one which was a guest room, normally reserved for Chloe when she housesat or didn't want to go back to an empty flat. The whole décor was subtly modern, aspects of the furniture was classic but with a modern twist. The kitchen opened up into the sitting area, where soft velvety sofas huddled around an open fire and plasma television perched above the fireplace.

Isabella and Jonas had already made themselves at home and were drinking enthusiastically from Jeromes fine wine glasses that he only broke out on special occasions.

Chloe received warming hugs from both. Isabella was in her late fourties, but still carried some of her youth in her vibrant red curly hair and sophisticated tailored suits. Jonas mirrored his wife in his smart dark trousers and pressed shirts.

"Oh my dear!" Iabella exclaimed with gusto, "I've been dying to see you, it's been too long" she smiled.

Chloe smiled, not very used to dramatic acts of welcome, but she recipucated curtiously and joined them both on the sofa with a glass of wine as they chatted about the weather and politics.

She always found it particularly hard with these meals that her godfather threw, because of the prying questions that began once the guests had consumed a little too much alcohol. Of course the winner of these questions was brought up just as the desert of ice cream had been cleared from the tables.

"So Chloe, when will we be expecting to see a ring on that finger of yours?" Isabella smiled, dabbing at her mouth with a serviette.

Chloe internally flinched, "Erm, not just yet" she said forcing a smile.

"Oh Jerome, you must invite some young men to these dinners of yours, some of the girls at my tennis club have bachelor sons I could introduce the pair of you too" she smiled, gulping down more wine.

Jerome glanced at his goddaughter and saw the pain behind her eyes. He always knew she hated these prying questions into her love life, especially as it hadn't been in existence since the rape. He wished he could take her out of this embarrassing situation, but it seemed she was one step ahead.

"If you excuse me, I must use the bathroom" she smiled and left the dinner table where Isabella was now discussing the absurd fashion sense her sister-in-law had.

In the bathroom, Chloe splashed water on her face and leaned over the sink. She liked Isabella, but she didn't know when to keep her mouth shut. It wasn't as if Chloe didn't receive any interest from the other sex. She had been asked out on numerous dates since the attack, but she just didn't feel comfortable about it. She had tried to force herself once, the guy was nice and friendly, there was nothing wrong with him, but she never replied to any of his calls and in the end he just gave up.

Feeling slightly refreshed, Chloe stepped out of the bathroom and starred into the guestroom where the door was open. She walked in and sat on the bed in the dark, listening to Isabella cackling away downstairs. Something crackled underneath her, she reached down and pulled out a thick brown file.

Curiously, Chloe opened the file and saw her own face starring up at her. It was picture taken the day after the attack. Her face was bruised and cut, her face was pale and alien to her, but why did Jerome have this? She flipped through the pages and was distressed to find report after report on her attack and that of several other girls, all around her own age that had been attacked by the same man, spanning right back to eighteen months ago. She held her hand to her mouth and sobbed. All this time, Jerome had all this information, all these other girls had been attacked by the same man and he hadn't said anything to her.

Chloe read the report on a twenty-two year old University girl, she was pretty apart from the black eye and slash down her cheek. She had been attacked walking home from a nightclub. Another girl was raped walking her dog through the park, another had been found distressed and half naked only a block from her parents home.

All these girls and Chloe had thought it had only been her. Shaking, Chloe dropped the file on the bed and furiously tried to wipe her tears away. Jerome had kept this from her, despite all her efforts to track down more leads. He had known all about this and had watched her futilly try to solve the case herself.

"Chloe?" came her godfathers voice from outside the bedroom.

"I'm in here, Jerome" she replied shakingly.

The dark silhouette stood in the doorway; she could see his eyes roam from her sad face to the file on the bed.

"Oh no" he whispered.

"Why the hell didn't you tell me?" she snapped through gritted teeth. Jerome took a step forward and wrung his hands.

"I am so sorry, Chloe. I was trying to protect you. I didn't want to see you get pulled apart by the case" he explained

"I was pulled apart! I was trying to find that monster so I could be whole again, but you went behind my back and withheld all this from me!" she stormed, "Those girls! Those girls are like me, they suffered like me and you thought I shouldn't know about that?"

Jerome looked terribly ashamed, "I am sorry, petit poisson-"

"Don't call me that! I can't believe you! You betrayed me" she hissed angrily.

"I only wanted what was best for you, I didn't want you to see what he had done to those girls, I only wanted to protect you!" he begged.

"I've been having nightmares about that night ever since it happened, I barely sleep, I barely live anymore, and the only way I can is if I catch that bastard myself! If I find him and make him pay for what he did to me, but you took that all away" she cried.

"Chloe…" Jerome said sadly, "…I am so sorry. I honestly thought I was doing what was best for you"

Tears blurred her vision, but her rage was clear and blunt, she couldn't bare to look at her godfather right now.

"I'm going home" she said and walked past him.

"Let me get my keys-" Jerome began but Chloe cut him off.

"I'll get a taxi!" she called over her shoulder and bounded down the stairs to see the curious faces of Isabella and Jonas.

"I say, what's going on up there?" she asked.

Chloe grabbed her coat and swung it over her shoulders, "It was nice to see you both again" she lied, "Good night" and with that she left the warmth of the house and entered the cold chill of the October air.

-oOo-

The bed was warm but Chloe felt cold inside. She knew she had perhaps been too harsh on Jerome. She knew he wouldn't intentionally hurt her, but she was angry that he had withheld that file when she had needed it to solve the case or at least get that bit closer to healing herself.

The phone rang for the seventh time that evening, each time Jerome left desperate messages for her to get in touch and that he was terribly sorry. She knew he was, but she still didn't want to talk to him, at least not yet. So glumly she flipped onto her back and dozed into an uncomfortable sleep.

-oOo-

Strgazer - Thanks very much, hope this is still up to standard!

Possessed-Gummy-Bear-Inferno - Construction is already well on the way for that cliff problem of yours. Hope you had a good Thanksgiving. I don't actually know when it is so if it's still to come, have a good one!

Laura - Simple yet sweet, thanks!

Stephanie - Wow, another positive review, I better not stop this story!

Angie - Well you better get together with Phoenix Rising, she's attending a support group!

phoenixrisingGhostLoveScore - Thanks mate, what a lovely review, reallys gives me that Oomph to continue jotting down the little movie version of this story playing in my head.

Mish - Yes, yes Aringarosa just has to be in this story. Do you have some kinda Bishop fetish?

i run with scissors - See, you can have fun AND learn...French that is. Thanks for reviewing!

A/N : Wow! I've had such positive feedback for this fan fic! I really thought I get a load of grief about MarySue but hey! not a word! Or are you all waiting for me to make Chloe something completely unrealistic. Maybe I'll give her superpowers or learn seven languages in two hours?

Keep up the reviewing, folks! You are my inspiration!