Chapter 11 : Troubles


The show was going well and with Effie's act missing and Johanna replacing her as his assistant, that was a small mercy.

Haymitch watched Katniss' performance from the shadow behind the ring, ready to jump back in there when she would wrap it up to announce Glimmer and Marvel.

"She got so much better…" someone commented to his left. He turned his head to find the mysterious Cinna making his way to him with an engaging smile and an outstretched hand. "We didn't meet earlier. I'm Cinna."

Haymitch shook the hand because he had no reason not to but there was something about the guy that left him a little guarded. Maybe it was the shadow of Vietnam that stalked his every step, maybe it was the fact that everyone he had talked to that afternoon had only had his name on their lips… Haymitch wasn't jealous, not at all. But being told that Cinna had been playing ringleader for a very short while before he had left to help Portia with her small tailoring shop – and then left further away to the other side of the world – hadn't exactly endeared him to him.

He wasn't jealous.

Why would he be? Sure, he hadn't really liked the way Effie had jumped in his arms but the guy had a wife and it was obvious they were friends and not… Sure, he resented how not sullen Katniss was around the man when she always scowled and dragged her feet every time he tried to teach her something… Sure, the easy acceptance and the genuine joy the others had displayed at his return rattled him because sometimes he still felt like the outsider… Sure, he had thought he was the first one Effie had chosen to be her right hand and not some sort of replacement for a ridiculously good-looking guy who, on closer inspection, actually wore eyeliner.

"Haymitch." he muttered, keeping his grey eyes on Katniss while she shot flaming arrows at various targets. It had been his idea to light the arrows on fire but he was still wary of the flames and always ready to move in case a spark caught the hay.

"I know." Cinna acknowledged. "You're all everyone could talk about today."

Haymitch spared him a glance, his eyebrows lifting up in surprise. "Could say the same about you."

The man laughed and shrugged. "I haven't been around in a long time. For some reason, they must have missed me."

The tone was genuine and Haymitch relaxed a little, telling himself he was being stupid. The guy had said he was going back in a couple of days and even if he actually chose to go AWOL… Even if he joined them… Effie wouldn't demote him just to give Cinna his place back. He was the ringleader now, that had been one of the terms they had agreed on when she had hired him.

She wasn't going to replace him now.

"You really did a good job with them…" Cinna continued, nodding at the ring. By them, Haymitch figured he meant the whole circus and not just Katniss. "The show is so much better than it was…"

"Yeah, well… That's what you get when you have a professional on the team." he snorted. Cinna smiled at him with clear amusement, apparently not put off by his arrogance.

Haymitch gave it a moment, long enough to go back to the ring to call out Katniss' name and introduce Glimmer and Marvel, and then took his place back next to the man who was watching with his hands in his pockets, apparently relaxed. Haymitch knew that kind of tricks though. He was ready to bet the hands weren't in his pockets because he was feeling at ease but because they were shaking.

"You're going back to Nam soon?" he asked.

"Three days." Cinna nodded. "I was lucky to get some leave in the first place." He shook his head and then tossed Haymitch a searching look. "You served?"

"Early on." Haymitch shrugged. "It wasn't pretty."

"You were lucky, then." Cinna commented. "It isn't just simply ugly out there. It's… madness. Some guys in my unit call it the arena." He scoffed. "None of it has any sense anymore."

"It never had." he told him.

They talked a little more and while the guy was interesting, Haymitch was almost glad when it was his turn to perform. Cinna had an intensity that made Haymitch ill-at-ease. He was an activist, that much the man had professed willingly and with pride, but the way he talked about it made Haymitch think what he truly wanted to be was a martyr.

By the time the show ended and Cinna had moved on to talking with the others, Haymitch felt a little bad for Portia. He had seen men with that spark in their eyes before. It wasn't long before they would do something stupidly heroic and get themselves killed.

After the show, he left everyone to the improvised party under the Big Top and went to his trailer as soon as Chaff assured him he had everything under control. He didn't even try to look for Effie that night, doubting she would be ready for her daily cigarette any time soon. He granted himself two mouthfuls of booze and then undressed and got into bed, eventually falling into an uneasy sleep.

An uneasy sleep from which he was snatched by a hand on his bare shoulder an indefinite amount of time later.

He didn't let himself think or hesitate. Thinking and hesitating meant certain death more often than not. He grabbed the arm, twisted his enemy over him and ended up straddling him with a hand around his throat. Smaller fingers wrapped tight around his wrist, nails dug into his skin…

The pain, small as it was, was enough to tear him from his confused daze.

"Effie." he breathed out when his eyes finally spotted her face in the semidarkness.

There was a small rectangular window not far from the bed and the night was clear enough. He was in his trailer. Not in a jungle but in his trailer. At the circus. Not the Quell but the Capitol. He was safe. He wasn't being attacked. He was home.

"Shit. Shit. Sorry." He let go of her throat quickly and moved off her and to the side, leaving her sprawled and stunned on the bed. "Sorry."

She cleared her throat and then gingerly touched her neck but eventually turned her head to look at him, the tension slowly leaving her body.

"I won't lie, I was hoping for a more enthusiastic welcome." she declared as if he hadn't just tried to strangle her.

He laughed.

It was nervous and almost hysterical. He was pretty sure his hands were shaking badly.

"Never startle me awake." he ordered, almost snapped. "Particularly if I don't know you're there when I fall asleep." He forced himself to soften his voice, forced himself to reach out because… She wasn't leaving. If she was scared she was hiding it extremely well. "I don't want to hurt you. I don't want…"

"It is alright. My mistake, really. You did not hurt me. You did not even squeeze that hard." she promised, covering the hand he had placed on her arm. "I am fine."

He peered at her throat, pretty sure that, hard or not, she would bruise anyway. Her skin was so pale… He had noticed she marked easily.

Still, he felt terrible for having hurt her, a little or not. The guilt was…

She turned on her side and reached out to cup his cheek. His grey eyes snapped to hers.

"I am fine, Haymitch, I promise. I should not have startled you." she whispered. The uncertainty must still have been dancing in his gaze because she brushed her thumb against his cheekbone. "You would never hurt me."

"Not awake, no. At least I hope so." he scoffed, reaching under his pillow for the knife he kept there and tossing it away. If she was disturbed by that, she didn't show it. But, then again, she had a good poker face.

"Is it… Is it from your time in…" she hesitated.

"Don't." he spat, shaking his head before leaning further in her palm. "I don't talk about the war."

"Alright." she agreed easily. "I am sorry I asked. It is just… I was talking with Portia and she mentioned similar… issues."

Which was probably why she wasn't that phased by it all, he figured.

"What are you doing here?" he asked, to change the subject. "What time is it?"

"Not that late." she hummed, lying back down and sprawling on her back like a content cat. Her dress was riding a little high on her legs, her blond hair was tousled on his pillow and the hand she placed on her stomach, right under the row of buttons that laid between her breasts gave him ideas. "I lent my trailer to Cinna and Portia, I could not leave them to sleep in their car! I did not think you would mind bunking with me but, of course, I can always go see if Johanna is willing to…"

He kissed her before she could finish that sentence.

The bed was narrow and his front was plastered to her side. There was no way she could miss his quickly growing interest. She chuckled a little against his lips and actually grabbed his head with both hands to deepen the kiss.

Truth be told, he wasn't too sure if it was kissing or fighting anymore. The heat of her mouth, the fingers tangled in his hair, the way his own dug into her hip…

It was hellish to break that kiss, to press his forehead against hers and take a deep breath…

"What is it?" she frowned and she sounded a little annoyed. Frustrated maybe.

"I'm waiting for someone to fucking interrupt." he snorted.

She stared at him for a second and then she chuckled… And then her mouth dropped soft enticing kisses along the length of his jaw, all the way up to his ear… She sucked in his earlobe and he sucked in a breath, clenching his fingers at her waist, bundling the dress in his fist…

"No interruption tonight." she whispered against the shell of his ear. "I am all yours."

Those words…

Did she know what a sweet torture they were? Did she know just how hot and bothered they made him? Did she know they shot straight to his groin?

I am all yours.

"Thought you preferred to be in charge?" he mocked – teased really because he was at a point when he would have gladly let her ride him into the sunset if only it meant he would get to have her.

"I am a flexible creature." she grinned, stealing another kiss.

"Flexible's a good word for it." he snorted, between two pecks. "Let's see how much, yeah?"

He pulled her back to her side so they were facing each other, ran a hand under her thigh… Her leg hooked over his hip but his fingers didn't stop their investigation, they found the soft curve of her ass… And absolutely no fabric…

"They were soaked." she answered his inquisitive glance and, this time, he didn't even bother to swallow back the groan because… How long had she been walking around him without underwear? "What was that trick you did earlier? With the buttons?"

He didn't have much patience for magic tricks right now.

He grabbed the dress and pulled until it tore, buttons flying everywhere. A shocked gasp passed her lips and then she scowled.

"I loved that dress!" she protested but it ended up in a squeal when he sat up to tug the dress off her.

He thought, for a second, that maybe he was being too rough, that he should control himself because… Well, he figured she might not be used to that. Sure, she talked big but when push came to shove…

Of course, then she snatched the sheets away and kicked them to the foot of the bed and if she was bothered to see he slept naked, she didn't let on. Her eyes roamed on his exposed flesh and he was aware of the weight of her gaze, aware of every flaw on display that told its own story – the swollen scar on his side, the burned part of skin on his shoulder blade, the soft stomach that used to be much firmer – but unable to really care because she was naked too and that was a much more fascinating sight.

He wanted her.

He wanted her so much.

He wanted her in so many ways, in all the ways…

Her black lacy bra was the only piece of fabric left on her and when he reached around her for the clasp, her hands flew to help him, undo it for him… And then she was truly naked and…

Fuck but she was magnificent.

He had known she would be. Of course, he had known. But…

He nudged her down, his nose immediately nuzzling the flat line between her breasts before taking a nipple in his mouth like he had been desperate to do that afternoon. He teased her with his tongue, switched breast only to hear her breathing quicken again… Her legs parted to frame his body, her hands explored his back, briefly groped his ass… Nails scratched his skin, prompting him to nip at the swell of her breast in rebuke…

Her back arched.

He felt her hand brush his thigh, sneak between their bodies… He prepared himself for it but when her fingers coiled around him, he couldn't help thrusting into her loose fist anyway.

"Tighter." he demanded, dropping a kiss over her heart. She tightened her hold but her movement were strangely hesitant. He frowned and propped himself on his elbows to study her face. "What's wrong?"

She licked her lips and shook her head. "Nothing."

He nudged her chin up a little, leaning down to brush his lips against hers. It was hard to pay attention, hard to think when her hand was pumping him…

"You wanna stop?" he asked before he was too far gone to do it. "Or… Slow down?"

It would kill him. Hell, it would kill him. But he wasn't going to force her into something she didn't want or wasn't ready for.

"No!" she protested immediately, her legs locking around his own, feet hooked over his calves. "It is nothing. You are just… You are bigger than…"

"Yeah?" he smirked, far too smug probably.

She rolled her eyes. "Oh, stop preening like a peacock and…"

Her sentence finished in a moan. He had pried her fingers away and had reached between her legs. She was wet already and that only made him smirk harder because the knowledge that she might want this as much as he did…

He wanted to eat her out.

He wanted her to suck him off.

He wanted…

Fuck, he wanted.

But he wasn't going to last long this time and what he wanted more than anything else was to be inside her.

He touched her and nipped at her breasts until she was incoherent with pleasure. He waited until he was sure she was ready before he nudged his head into her. Her whole body arched with bliss, a small cry escaping her throat.

He chuckled.

"Don't mock me." she scowled, out of breath. Her eyes were bright, her pupils blown… She was so beautiful…

"Ain't mocking you." he muttered, rocking his hips slowly until he was completely inside. It was difficult to stop himself from pounding into her but he forced himself to remain calm, to leave her time to adjust. There would be time for rough later. Now… Now it had been a long time for her and he wanted this to be nice. He was big, it wasn't just a matter of pride but practicality, and he didn't want to hurt her. "Shout away. I like it."

He liked it even more when it was his name she was shouting, he decided a few minutes later when the blood rushed to his ears and he was losing grip on everything that wasn't her, her warmth and his desperate need to reach his release.

"Harder." she kept begging between two calls of his name. "Haymitch, harder. Harder."

He forgot any notion of being nice and grabbed her under the thighs, forced her legs over his shoulders, almost bent her in two while he fucked her… Her cries spurred him on. Her voice became higher, louder… A part of him wondered if she could be heard outside the trailer, the rest of him really didn't care.

When she came, it was with a shout, her fingers buried deep into the muscles of her own thighs as she held herself open for him.

It was hot and dirty in all the right way and the way she kept mumbling his name afterwards like a chant, half unaware of her surroundings as she came down from her high, was too much for him. He felt his balls tighten, felt himself coming… One last thrust and he pulled out just in time to spill all over her stomach. He collapsed on the mess without one care in the world, breathless and sated like he hadn't been in a long time.

The trailer reeked of sex and for a while, the only noise was their ragged breathing. She petted his hair distractedly and he sometimes dropped kisses against her collarbone. She had hooked one of her legs over his and Haymitch might have fallen asleep like that, sticky mess forgotten, if it hadn't started raining. The familiar sounds of rain drops on the roof made the whole setting even more intimate, like a cocoon but it also roused them a little.

"Haymitch?" she whispered, sounding sleepy too. "Do you have a towel?"

He mumbled an assent and with a last kiss pressed against her neck pushed himself off her to go rummage in the small utilitarian bathroom. He cleaned himself while he was there and then came back to the bed with a wet cloth to wipe her stomach. After a second of hesitation, he also cleaned her thighs and between her legs. She let him, a soft smile on her lips.

When he slipped back into bed, she immediately snuggled against his side with a content sigh.

He was relieved she didn't ask why he had pulled out because he didn't want to have the kids discussion right now. He wasn't sure he ever wanted to have it. Children… He didn't think he wanted any. Certainly not while the war was still raging on. He might change his mind in time but…

He knew there were contraceptive methods out there, certain ways to make sure no baby was conceived, but they were expensive and difficult to find and he wasn't sure they were even legal for unmarried couples. They would have to make do for now.

"I had a thought…" she hummed against his neck.

"You don't say." he deadpanned, earning himself a playful slap on the stomach. He pulled her leg higher over his body in answer, only happy once she was half draped on top of him. There was a lot of giggling on her part and a few attempts at biting her shoulder and neck on his. "So? What's that thought?" he asked when they had stopped fooling around.

"We should do it again." she grinned.

"That was in question?" he snorted, burying his fingers in her blond hair. He loved her hair, he decided. The curls bounced back into place when he tugged on them. It was a game he could have spent hours playing.

"We should do it again tonight." she clarified, her hand brushing a path down his chest to the thin patch of hair on his lower belly. He shivered, his mouth suddenly parched. He felt himself twitch with renewed interest.

"Give me ten minutes." he requested.

"Oh, I am pretty sure I can cut that time in half…" she joked and before he could say anything else, her mouth followed the path her fingers had traced and…

When her lips closed on him, he brought his hands to his face and forced himself to breathe not to embarrass himself like a teenager.

She was too perfect.

She was too perfect and he might have been half in love with her already.

At that moment, she could have asked anything and he would have found a way to give it to her.

Fuck, but he was in so much trouble…


Sooooo Haymitch is in troubles :p Did you enjoy the smut? We agreed I cannot write that to save my life BUT I did my best! Let me know your thoughts!